Tuesday, October 08, 2013
Okay, I found it! The way to eat all you want and still lose weight!
It happened while I was making my standard yogurt parfait of unsweetened blueberries with Fage 0% yogurt, a grind of nutmeg and pumpkin seeds. I weigh and measure everything now because if I don't I will inevitably serve myself more and for some items that can boost me right out of my recommended nutrient range. I usually want MORE.
As I was weighing out my punks, I decided that 0.3 ounce was just not enough. I wanted MORE. I was tired of being deprived and I was going for a full half ounce! Grrrrr, I wanted it, I deserved it, it wouldn't bust my calorie bank and gosh darn, I was going to have it! I weighed out the half ounce and picked up the serving to sprinkle it over the yogurt and then it happened.
It looked like too many seeds. Now, my love of nuts and seeds is deep, abiding and passionate. They have called me across a room to stand before them and eat them in handfuls from the jar. But it just looked like too many to be in balance with the other portions. Like having a tablespoon of ice cream floating in a cup of hot fudge. (Sorry if that sounds good to anyone!)
Then it occurred to me. This is the point of most of what I've been learning and practicing with the last several skills from the Beck book. Make a plan. Stick to it. Eat mindfully. Stop eating when you're full. They finally internalized. Enoughness! Somehow I made the switch from "more, more, more!" to enoughness. After weeks of just doing it, I was finally feeling it.
And what a powerful tool enoughness is! Not just for eating but for everything we think we own or accomplish. I feel so blessed.
Wishing you all a day filled with gratitude for the enoughness in your life! If you aren't there yet or just today, keep doing what you need to do and you will.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
BECK DIET SOLUTION DAY 19: STOP FOOLING YOURSELF
This exercise reminds me of a night in Puerto Rico when a lizard dropped from the ceiling onto my face, waking me. Walking into the kitchen that we swept and mopped each night after dinner and turning on the light, I saw an army of cockroaches scatter from across the floor into the cracks and crevices. They had come in from the lush tropics outside, under cover of night, to make their rounds. Just checking to see if anything was available for munching and making egg nurseries, I guess.
Iíve cleaned up a lot of my mental space over the last eighteen days of Beck training. Iíve felt pretty solid in my new skills and Iím showing small but steady losses on the scale. But the past few days Iíve noticed that Iím starting to nibble on slivers of carrot and to lick measuring spoons when Iím cooking. I wasnít aware of any thoughts triggering these actions but they must be sneaking in under cover of darkness and finding some part of my brain to feed on.
The Buddha said that thought becomes action, action becomes habit and habit becomes character. So watch the thought! He must have been great at thinking like a thin person.
Day 19 shows up just in time to help me shine some light on those stealth thoughts and, I hope, keep it on so they either donít crawl back or if they do (as seems more likely) I can swat them with a mental broom. Beck has a handy checklist of delusional thoughts and I recognized some of mine in the light of her checklist. Ready for a peak into the tropics of my mind for some unskillful thoughts?
Itís just a little piece.
Itís not fattening.
Itís really part of my planned meal.
It wonít matter.
It will go to waste!
I really want it.
I donít care.
Iíll adjust for it later.
It wonít matter.
I made one Response Card for all of these delusional thoughts. I could have made a response to each delusional thought but for me, it all comes down to one thing... and one thing is easier to remember. As I've done for every other Beck skill, I made a commitment card and a reward-from-this-skill card.
RESPONSE CARD: Itís NOT OKAY TO CHEAT. Cheating on a diet and expecting it to work is like cheating on a marriage and expecting that to work. Honor your commitments.
COMMITMENT CARD: The next time I catch myself thinking a delusional thought Iím going to say out loud, ďItís not okay to cheat on your spouse or your diet.Ē
REWARD CARD: DIETING WILL BE EASIER ONCE I STOP FOOLING MYSELF.
My Beck index card file is getting fat so I wonít have to.
Friday, September 27, 2013
This is the snapshot of me as I step off the deck after our 12-week cruise on the good ship BLC23:
I start each day with prayer, meditation and exercise.
I strength train three days a week.
I weigh 12 pounds less.
I plan and prep the week's meals in advance on one day.
I follow my meal plan.
I am not vampire dessert because my HbA1C is below 6.5!!!
How will I get there? With S.M.A.R.T. goals, of course.
Week 1: Prayer & meditation 5 min, exercise 10 min
Week 2: Prayer & meditation 5 min, exercise 15 min
...now add strength 3 times per week (10 min cardio, 10 min strength to start)
Week 3: Prayer & meditation 5 min, exercise 20 min
Week 4: Prayer & meditation 5 min, exercise 25 min
Week 5: Prayer & meditation 5 min, exercise 30 min
Week 6: Prayer & meditation 10 min, exercise 30 min
Week 7: Prayer & meditation 15 min, exercise 30 min
Week 8-10: Prayer & meditation 15 min (morning); add 5 min/week (evening), exercise 30 min
Plan and eat within Spark Nutrition Tracker or WW guidelines.
Block out Sunday on calendar and plan, shop and prep until I know how long it takes. Then block out the time needed on each Sunday.
Use support from Azurite team mates, Beck buddy Callie and awesome Beck coach Marsha to stick to it.
Do blood tests on awakening, before and after every meal or snack and before bed; treat appropriately.
It's out there, it's scary in writing now!
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