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FUN WITH COLOR!!!

Friday, February 01, 2013

You guys have *got* to try this!

http://www.xrite.com/custom_page.aspx?pa
geid=77&lang=en

The bands are four separate exercises - arrange in order from one end to the other (the ends are fixed, the rest are drag-and-drop.)


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Okay, got your scores?

I shocked myself - got a 3. I did better than my children, including the professional photographer. I *am* good at something! emoticon



Now, how can I make money with this skill..... emoticon


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Incidentally, as for all that blogging I did yesterday, I've decided to slay one dragon at a time. February will be devoted to fitness.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLORIDASUN 3/13/2013 8:42AM

    I'm a little miffed! emoticon Known by my friends as 'the Queen of all things Color" I only scored a 10! How can that be...I must have been in a hurry..hee..hee! emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 2/2/2013 10:41PM

    LO. Fitness it is.

I promise to try this when I can see straight.

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BETHGILLIGAN 2/1/2013 2:38PM

    Your site is causing me much frustration today! I got an email that you posted a blog about an I hate to cook team. Sounds right up my alley--however, it doesn't seem to be on here. Next, I can't get the link in this one to work. emoticon I have copy and pasted the link a number of times with no luck. Now, I'll never know if I was good at this or not.

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AURORAMILLET 2/1/2013 2:00PM

    Interesting, I will have to try it!!

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TIME2BLOOM4ME 2/1/2013 11:10AM

    emoticon

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February...it's a short month...

Thursday, January 31, 2013

so I figure it's the best time to set some goals - better than a month with 31 days, anyway. Hey, baby steps.

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So I wrote all of the below, then got an unexpected call from daughter #2, who took her car in to be looked at by a local mechanic. He's a father of three daughters himself, and she said that when he looked underneath her car, he just blanched and told her that she could have been killed, literally any moment, driving that car. Apparently the steering is so bad that it's a hairsbreadth away from locking in a right turn, sending her into the car next to her or over the cliff (and in Pittsburgh, there are plenty of cliffs.)

The thing is, she got the whole steering thing replaced a year ago, so this mechanic is going to have words with the place that did it, and with any luck she can work out a way to get the other things fixed on some sort of payment plan. I wish I could help her, but she makes more than I do, by quite a bit.

____________________________

In light of the above shakeup, I'm considering just swearing that in February, I will be A Proper Grown-Up and set a Good Example for the Children.

________________________________________
__________________________________
written earlier:

I'm not even going to promise to log everything, because I know I won't do it. I won't log food - I've sworn too many times to do that, and it never happens. I'll try (and don't get on me about the Yoda thing) to check off the water and freggies, but I don't promise.

I *will* promise to do some sort of fitness thing every day, even if some days it's just the One Minute Yoga. And I *will* promise to log the fitness - I'm interested to see how much I actually do and don't do. I worked so many jobs where fitness was just sort of a side effect of daily life, like when I had the landscaping company, that it's difficult for me to make exercise a daily priority, but now that circumstances have changed, I see that I need to do this.

As a corollary to the above, I promise to wear the FitBit every day and remember to download its info. I also promise not to throw another one into the washing machine, still attached to the bra it was clipped onto - that was getting expensive.

I also promise to cut back the glasses of wine from 3-4 to 1-2 (no, it's not an every day thing.) No problem there - just need to pay more attention. That goes hand in hand with the next one:

I promise to do the dishes after every meal. (Thank goodness that doesn't start til tomorrow .) That might seem like I'm being an awful slob now, but if you live alone and hate to cook, you really don't generate that many dishes, so they're easy to ignore..

I also promise to be sure I'm getting a sufficient amount of protein.

That's enough for now. February isn't a great time to swear to eat more vegetables or fruits, since I'm pretty much devoted to local produce and right now there isn't any. I'll promise that in another couple months.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MYOWNHERO 2/5/2013 5:50PM

    Wow...what a month!

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MORTICIAADDAMS 2/2/2013 10:37PM

    That is so scary about your daughter and the steering wheel. I'm glad she had it looked at.

I loved you goals! So uniquely you.

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BETHGILLIGAN 2/1/2013 1:50PM

    Geez, Louise!! That's quite a list there!!! I think you've about covered the bases!! Do what you really care about and forget the rest. (I don't care if you don't do your dishes. You live alone, it's OK!!)

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HIPPICHICK1 2/1/2013 1:47PM

    Great goals list!
I know what you mean about having a job where fitness was part of it. I taught dance for 7 years and could easily burn up to 600 calories on those days. Now that I have to WORK at it....
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It ain't that easy.

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TIME2BLOOM4ME 2/1/2013 11:11AM

    emoticon

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FLORIDASUN 2/1/2013 9:35AM

    Hey...those goals are pretty admirable! At least you don't lie in public! Smirk...I have many sparkling friends that are just too...well...perfect!

I'd like to shadow them for a week or two and make sure they REALLY eat only nutritionally balanced meals with each and every lettuce leaf properly calculated into the tracker. Come on Lucy! No one is that perfect every single day of the spark week!

But...on the other hand...maybe that is why they have a ga-zillion spark points at the top of their page and I have a measly...what is it...20,000 something after almost FOUR spark years!

Some days I'm reduced to grabbing a 3 point booster on the recipe page...and DON'T get me started on those that take the 3 points without even rating the recipe..there should be some spark zapper that flys out of the keyboard for those who rant without rate.

I'm going to my Slow Cooker RIGHT now to make my Slow Cooker Spanish Chicken for tonight...ohhhh those 3 extra points are going to feel SO good tomorrow!

Seriously I love my FitBit...love it to the moon and back. It really inspires the booty to keep moving! AND...I don't have to log it...it goes into the tracker automatically!

Boy howdy! emoticon The wonders of technology! emoticon

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KASEYCOFF 2/1/2013 2:34AM

    I hear you about the dishes: I used to frown at my mother-in-law's habit of rinsing them, putting them in the dish-drainer, then re-using them, without soap and hot water in between. She lived alone, and only washed dishes "properly" if people came around for a meal. Now, with the kids grown and gone and just the two of us rattling around here - I can sorta see that the ol' lady made sense. Far better things to do than a few dishes. Besides, why waste the soap / hot water until there's a basinful?
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_UMAMI_ 2/1/2013 1:14AM

    Sleep!
That's what I would rec to you in your part or the world, at this time of year.
Also, I have no idea if this is legit, but we've had many, many grey days for weeks, and, even when it wasn't grey out, I'm kind of a skin cancer poster matron, so I started taking Vitamin D, and I realized that today, despite stress, lack of sleep, the usual, I felt pretty damn good! I'm NOT a supplements advocate, but I think I may try to keep taking the anti-depressant med supplements: Vit D, FIsh oil, B vitamins, etc.

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DOLLFACEDX 2/1/2013 12:14AM

    emoticon emoticon

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SUZYMOBILE 1/31/2013 8:12PM

    Don't forget to make your bed.

(Just kidding! Whatever is important will rise to the top of the list and get done.)

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NORASPAT 1/31/2013 5:53PM

    I have sworn back to my Fitness for 28 days. I began with Spark in January but it took the entire month to work out what to do. I almost QUIT so February was my first success. I hope I can repeat the result.

I hope your Daughter is able to get that car fixed. I hope it was a dealerships garage and she has the paperwork too. It is good the new place will attempt to help.
Take care of yourself and eating more protein always works for me. I rarely feel hungry with protein.

HUGS Pat in Maine. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Another Blog About Nothing (This Time, the Mayan Apocalypse)

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

(Hey, it worked for Seinfeld.)

No, I never really thought the world would end on December 21st. Even though I get a great deal of enjoyment out of Doomsayers, I have more intellectual respect for Weird Scholars, and the Mayan expert at a nearby Ivy League university told us early on that all this was being misinterpreted. He seemed to have his head on straight, and his hat wasn't covered with tin foil (which I suppose is actually made of aluminum now...was it ever made of tin?) so I went with his opinion.

Anyway, the one thing that I was interested in never came to light - I wanted to see if there'd be a huge rise in the number of people who would "Buy It Now, No Payments Til 2013!!!" on the theory that they could enjoy the product, then the world would end before payments were due.

A somewhat related question was whether people would hold holiday parties earlier (to get them in before the Apocalypse) or later (to avoid the whole thing), and whether Christmas spending would be significantly up ("May as well spend it now, before the cataclysm") or down ("We'll need all our resources for fighting off the zombies after the 21st.")

And speaking of zombies, I never did find out why The Zombie Survival Guide is on the list of NYT Bestsellers under NONfiction. Personally, I find this troublesome. No, I have not read the book, so perhaps the title is misleading and the book has nothing at all to do with zombies. Still...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WONDERFUL2BME 2/1/2013 9:30AM

    I never bought into the world ending either ... well okay it did catch my attention. Haha. I guess put it this way, I didn't care either way. Haven't we been dealing with Zombies for a loooong time. I see them everywhere just going about the day in trances.


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FLORIDASUN 2/1/2013 9:23AM

    Yaha...love this blog...love it indeed!

The whole Y2K apocalypse put some SERIOUS doubt in my mind about the panty whiners! I'm WAY too busy worrying about slowly irradiating ourselves with polluted food and water to pay attention to calendar predictions. Although I seriously have more respect for the Mayan ideology in comparison to the wonkers we have in Congress running our country!

I mean REALLY what kind of moron elects people to do OUR work and allows them to give themselves raises, life long health insurance, the ability for THEIR kids to get educated without having to pay back their college loans AND takes money from shysters to make the laws that allow the shysters to flouish unabated!

Yea...those zombie characters...I don't have to read about them in a book...they walk the streets of Washington EACH and EVERY day. You can't kill em...so what to do...what to do...they have no consciences so I'd say they are already amongst the walking dead!

We need to start a squad...Zombie Killers Unite! Just kid din ...well....sort of! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 2/1/2013 9:25:03 AM

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KASEYCOFF 2/1/2013 2:37AM

    Here in the UK the date is written day / month / year. I usually write out the full year - 2013 - just to remind myself I'm in the 21st century, let alone that the year has changed. Yesterday, packaging soup for the freezer, I dated the containers "31.1.13" - and it occurred to me no thought there might be any sort of apocalyptic event, ala 12.12.12. Me, now, I figure a palindromic date is even more likely to invite cosmic forces, lol...
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AJDOVER1 1/30/2013 11:53PM

    Yeah, December 21 was the worst apocalypse EVER!

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REDWRITINGHOOD 1/30/2013 12:00PM

    I love all things zombie. I don't want to be one just fight them if the need ever arises, lol.

The Mayan Doomsday thing was a great running joke last year. We did decide since it fell on my mom's b-day we would all spend it together and that it would also be an end of the world party (AND ended up being partly a family Christmas party since my sister left the next day for Canada to spend Christmas with her hubby's family).

I saw the calendar as a cyclical thing. Not a complete ending of things, just an end of one thing and the beginning of another. I'm kinda disappointed that nothing cool happened like aliens arriving and curing all our woes, lol.

Love the blog and you (((hugs)))

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APPLEPIEAPPLE 1/30/2013 9:48AM

    My son is into Zombies. But the the book is about surviving any disaster. In theory, if you can survive a Zombie attack , you have the skills to survive other major disasters since the same stuff happens.

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BETHGILLIGAN 1/30/2013 8:54AM

    I almost held off on Christmas shopping (hate it!), hoping I wouldn't have to do it. But, thank goodness, thought better of that idea!! You do have to wonder---the world is a pretty big mess right now. How do we ever straighten it out??? Too depressing--guess I'll mop that kitchen today!! emoticon

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JANEDOE12345 1/29/2013 7:25PM

    You know, I think we are in the end times. Just about every single thing I look at is whacked in some fundamental way. It's depressing when I really focus on it. This is not what I expected: dirty air, climate change, gross things like bedbugs becoming a middle-class scourge, religion going to waste, the entire middle east (and the USSR) collapsing, the US economy in deep doo-doo...need I say more.

Feeling sad about it, actually.

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JANEDOE12345 1/29/2013 7:19PM

    My son did a paper at MIT on aluminum hats. I will see if I can dig up a link as it was quite funny...Found it http://berkeley.intel-research.net/
arahimi/helmet/
Read it, it is fun. It was all over the web at the time, a hoot for geeks of all ages.


Here is a favorite article about it..."I’m not sure how this study out of MIT slipped our notice for so long, but I’ve instructed my executive assistant (Miss Betsy Whiskercuddlebunch, Esq.) to update our Google alerts so we’ll get news about tin foil hat studies even when they don’t fit the criteria of +cat OR +dog.

(Names Blocked) at Electrical Engineering and Computer Science department and the Media Lab at MIT put together a thoroughly tongue-in-cheek study of the radio wave deflection capabilities of three different double-layered tin foil hat designs: “the Classical, the Fez, and the Centurion”. They tested frequencies from 10 Khz to 3 Ghz at three different spots of the skull in four subjects wearing the tin foil hat then not wearing it. They used a $250,000 network analyzer to plot the attenuation between the signals, which is obviously the most important thing to do with a $250,000 network analyzer.

Now get ready for some conspiracy stuff. Every helmet amplified the 2.6 Ghz band by 30 db and the 1.2 Ghz and 1.5 Ghz bands by 20 db regardless of the position of the antenna. Bands between 1.2 Ghz and 1.4 Ghz are allotted to the U.S. government, while the 2.6 Ghz band is reserved for mobile phones. The researchers conclude their tongue-in-cheek study with this statement:

It requires no stretch of the imagination to conclude that the current helmet craze is likely to have been propagated by the Government, possibly with the involvement of the FCC. We hope this report will encourage the paranoid community to develop improved helmet designs to avoid falling prey to these shortcomings. [Intel via ZGeek]"


Read more: http://www.uproxx.com/gammasquad/20
12/06/tin-foil-hats-amplify-gov
ernment-signals/#ixzz2JPfsSa7p


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MORTICIAADDAMS 1/29/2013 6:51PM

    Like Seinfeld, hubby and I got a lot of mileage out of the Mayan Doomsday Prophecy. Unfortunately, there are those people who get insulted because they actually believed it.

The zombie book in nonfiction does sound very interesting. I'm intrigued now.

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SUZYMOBILE 1/29/2013 6:34PM

    So, Bill's birthday was the day AFTER the Apocalypse, so he was pretty determined that they be wrong.

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SHERYLDS 1/29/2013 5:23PM

    www.maxbrookszombieworld.com/
ha
s an attack preparedness video for the ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE
funny stuff.

Actually ... looking at the world in which we live...I sometimes think the MAYANS may not be totally wrong...just that their calendar stopped working. When you read about the way things are all over the world ... you have to wonder. And someday, fresh water will be at a premium and the only clean water will be in bottles...Warren Buffet is buying up water rights even today.

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A Minor Thing that Really Bothers Me (Totally OT)

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Okay, where I live it's been cold as...let's see, "hell" isn't cold....I don't like "witch's tit"..."ice" is so cliché...I remember an old phrase, probably WWI era, about freezing the brass balls off a monkey - or possibly the balls off a brass monkey - , but I don't recall the derivation any more...

All right, let's just say it's been really cold here. Single digits on warmer days, wind chills into the negative 20ºs. (for all you folks who live where it gets colder than that...God bless you.)

What really bothers me is when you go to The Weather Channel or the NOAA weather site on your computer, and they say " Low of 3º " when it is currently -1º. Obviously, " Low of 3º " is incorrect.

What's more, I believe that even I could write a quick and dirty program to fix that, and I'm no coder (I remember guys in my class - this was a long time back - saying they input something-or-other "...and it gave me a Mode 4 Error!" then helplessly collapsing in gales of laughter. I had Not A Clue.)

I hate when it says we're to have a partly cloudy day, but when I let the four-leggers back into the house, they're all wet. Rain, obviously. Not "partly cloudy."

I remember one day not long ago when the local Weather Guy gave the following forecast: clear early, then some wind and clouds, rain or possibly sleet or snow developing. Come on! What the !@#$ else is there? I'd rather he'd just shrug and say, "I dunno. Weather's changeable around here. "

When I still worked as a landscaper, I had in my truck at all times a tank top, flip flops and sunscreen, a rain suit, boots, a knitted cap, a sweatshirt, three pair of socks and a change of jeans and underwear (because no one wants to be wearing soggy underwear after an unexpected downpour.) I understand the nature of living in a place where, for some reason, it's difficult to predict the weather.

Still, to come right out and promise that it won't get any colder than Xº when it *already is* X-3º is just...stupid. And annoying.

Thanks for listening. I feel better now.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

_UMAMI_ 1/25/2013 8:46PM

    Not the same issue here, but, we're in a metro area, yet the weather forecasters try to cover ALL OF NORTH TEXAS, even into OK. Impossible. Irritating! Unreliable!

And, in a pinch, internet goes down and you can't check the national radar sites or sites off the grid!

How 'bout this for predictions?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cr
omniomancy

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APPLEPIEAPPLE 1/25/2013 1:25PM

    I just went through that!! Venting does help. emoticon

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HIPPICHICK1 1/25/2013 12:16PM

    Oh, LOL!! Apparently the weather can only be accurately forecast about 3 hours before it happens. I have seen rain on one side of my house and sun on the other!
"Changes like the weather," is another saying to add to your collection of monkeys with brass balls...or brass monkeys with balls.

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JRSWHIMSY 1/24/2013 11:37PM

    You've forgotten my father's favorite - colder than a well digger's butt!

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FLORIDASUN 1/24/2013 10:12PM

    Okay...no griping about the dog days of summer here in SW FL where the stinkin' humidity is 100% at 5 a.m. in the morning!

The weather forecasters here are useless...absolutely useless! I prefer Seri's forecast...and she's an I-Phone!

Being in the concrete biz for so many years..rain warnings are necessary. Our forecasters got it right maybe...hummm...scratches head thoughtfully...hummm...nope can't put my finger on a SINGLE stinkin' time.

I think the constant sun beating on one's head...frys one's brain...me myself...I use sunscreen..only possible reason I'm so bloomin smart! emoticon emoticon

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SLIMLILA 1/24/2013 10:08PM

    Glad you got all that off you chest and vented it away.

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NORASPAT 1/24/2013 9:43PM

    Today i saw nothing but oil trucks in my area of Augusta. In Our home the furnace has run almost all day long. It is most definitely a degree day.

I never experienced deep snow or nose frozen inside in England. That was my big panic if my nose freezes inside I will be unable to breathe. I have made all kinds of weird hats and ear muffs.
We are surrounded by thermometers on all sides of our home and most neighbours have the big round ones in our back yard so in essence we know what we are facing before we leave the house.
We rarely watch TV and so we just have to wing it. It helps that we are both retired so we can just stay put. In fact we are definitely housebound since DH had his surgery. I and he are doing fine. I love reading your blogs. HUGS Pat in Maine.
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SUZYMOBILE 1/24/2013 8:57PM

    I knew Morticia would have something to say about THIS topic! She's a weather connoisseur. Your weather sounds like New England, though I know you aren't there. The saying there: "If you don't like the weather, wait a minute."

Comment edited on: 1/24/2013 8:58:26 PM

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MORTICIAADDAMS 1/24/2013 7:59PM

    Yep, everyone complains about the weather and no one does anything about it. LOL. We have a local station that will be telling us it is partly cloudy when it is absolutely pouring outside at the exact time they are talking. You feel like calling up and asking if they hear something unusual outside on the roof or see anything different out the windows. The answer is no and no. The barely out of their teens newsmen and women on our local channel have a laptop in front of their face and when you watch the news and weather you feel like you are tearing them away from their Farmville game. "Hello - you are on the air. Look into the camera! Look at us! If we wanted to be ignored we could get our news off of the internet." We have the worst weather forecasters here. If we get a good one they will soon be gone. Most of ours spend their time doing just what you said - not wanting to go out on a limb to predict the weather but they will tell you how to dress your kid and yourself. I don't know how many times these morons have told me to take my umbrella and I have had to carry the darned thing around all day while a cloud didn't even pass in front of the sun. They are idiots.

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SHERYLDS 1/24/2013 7:27PM

    i get nervous that they still can't accurately give solid info when they have a major storm and people have become complacent about the news overstating the danger...so they don't take precautions.

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BETHGILLIGAN 1/24/2013 7:19PM

    Although my daughter complains about the same thing, it seems the cold weather may be making you a bit cranky! emoticon

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ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 1/24/2013 6:30PM

    I'm sorry it's so cold! Yes, it is annoying.

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UUCEEJAY 1/24/2013 6:26PM

    Well, I hope they are wrong about the rain in NY on Tues and Wed. It would sure be nice if it didn't rain on my ski vacation. Sure, I plan a vacation and it is cold and snows then the next week it is supposed to maybe get all the way to 50 degrees. Unfortunately, they did a great job of predicting the rain on my ski vacation last year about the same time.
Send your weatherman my way and maybe he can jinx this by predicting rain and it will snow. emoticon emoticon

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2012: lots of good, some bad, a few real uglies.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

I've been debating where to start, how to explain, how much detail to go into before I bore you guys (and myself) stupid with the Continuing Saga. I've decided to do what they tell you to do when you're packing for a trip - put in everything you want to take, then remove half. So I'll write a short novella here, then edit out at least half so we don't all go out of our minds. Deal?

HOLIDAYS:
Due to financial, employment schedule and travel issues, I couldn't go see my daughters and they couldn't make it here. I spent Christmas and New Year's alone, just me and the snow and the four-leggers, without a functional vehicle. Well and truly housebound, I discovered how much there was to eat in the house (quite a bit, if you aren't fussy, and I'm not) and how many lovely books I hadn't read in years (many, many.) Funny... I was braced to be devastated, depressed, and was oddly okay with the whole thing. I think partly it was I was freed of decision making and responsibility - I had no money and no car, so that was that.

EMPLOYMENT:
The job at the candle company (which won the Martha Stewart Award for American Made Excellence back in September) was fabulous and they thought I did a great job. For reasons largely beyond my control, and to a degree theirs as well, I don't work there any more.

Now I have a job at a local - as in, Very Small Town - EZMart sort of place - gas, cigarettes, deli, strange assortment of random items, lots of (mostly nasty) brands of beer and fresh coffee pretty much any time. I make the same money I made at the other job, only it's a third the distance. And they gave me free T-shirts. *shrug* Money's money.

Working on several other things - you know I'll tell you as soon as I have something concrete.

HEALTH:
Fine, thanks. Lost a little better than 40 pounds last year (forty to go), mostly because I ate what the CSA gave me and pretty much only that. Getting out of the house more (because of jobs, both paid and unpaid) caused many fewer alcoholic beverages to be consumed, also. The doctor insisted that I come in for a check-up because it had been several years since she'd seen me - hey, I wasn't sick! All the things that they check - BP, temp., HR, and basic blood work was all great. Looks like I've got a few miles left on me.

FINANCES:
Suck, for the most part. Last year I had the phone, tv and finally internet all turned off for lack of payment, and got seven months behind on my home equity loan (I paid off the mortgage years ago, but the line has a substantial balance.) Student loan people very displeased as well. Everything I made at the candle place wound up going into new snow tires and auto repairs. However, I got a new contract for haying, and the advance on that allowed me to get caught up with the equity line, get the internet turned back on, and get everyone else (the electric company, the tv, the phone, etc.) all paid off, although I opted not to have the landline restored and didn't get the tv turned back on (didn't miss it enough to bother.) Student loan deferred. Taxes still an issue, but I'm working on them.

WHERE TO LIVE:
I'd resisted even the idea of moving from here with all my strength and determination, but somehow, somewhere in my brain, a switch flipped recently and I realized that I was desperate to stay here because it was a place my late husband loved with all his heart, my children had grown up, and where I'd been happy, none of which has anything to do with The Now.

When I'd sold my mother's house (she and my dad had bought it when I was three months old), I'd reluctantly realized that there was nothing for me there anymore - it was all memories, rather than future. I've - like in the last ten days - realized the same thing about here. I'm 57, and given that the women in my family tend to live well into their 90s, unless I want to live 30 or 40 years with my eyes on the rear view mirror (and I don't), I have to allow for the possibility of moving. Just as in Philadelphia, there's nothing for me here. There are people I like well enough, sure, but neither they nor I will fall apart if I go. So I'm working on a deal with some local Amish folks (two separate families have indicated genuine interest) to sell not just some acreage, but the whole shootin' match. Details will undoubtedly follow as they get worked out. I'm not in a big hurry, but I feel completely free to do whatever I want to do. I think I'd like to move back to the part of PA that's quite near both where my daughters live now and where my mother's family comes from. Maybe there's something to that "land being in your blood" thing.

FRIENDS:
Lost a friend of 30+ years because I got tired of letting her Always Be Right. I'm very live-and-let-live, and whenever we'd have a disagreement, I'd just let it flow over me, because, well, that's pretty much how I am. I don't have to be Right ( I won't generally agree that I'm wrong, but I won't fight about it.) Recently she crossed some lines that just weren't to be crossed - embroiling my children in controversy, labeling me as mentally ill because I didn't agree with her approach to life. I saw us as different; her view that she was Right and I had to be mentally ill not to see that and agree with her position.

Realized that sometimes you have to be willing to let go. Discovered that real friends give you a shoulder you need in times of crisis, rather than arguing about whether you should need it or not. Also that people who haven't been in a particular situation have no clue about how you feel and most certainly have no business defining the "correct" way to respond. Allow people the dignity they deserve, even if you don't understand how they could possibly live as they do.

CURRENT ACTIVITIES:
Working at the EZMart, dabbling in This and That, sorting through decades - hell, centuries in some cases - of Stuff. I realized just how much of this Stuff is the accumulation of other people's lives, and even though I wound up with it, I'm not its Designated Keeper. Lots of things I'll hang onto for no reason other than I think it's fascinating - the war ration coupons, for example. I love history and Old Stuff in general. I'm doing The Big Sort in the barn, and when I'm finished, I'll probably have the local auction people take it out and auction it for me. Not sure I have the patience for a yard sale. I dunno - I'm a long way from that point.


Yeesh. This still turned out to be waaaaay too long. Anyone who's still here, thanks for hanging on - it's been a hell of a ride. 2013 is going to be very different from previous years for me, and I believe for a lot of people - in a good way.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLORIDASUN 1/24/2013 10:33PM

    I so totally 'get it' and understand the comfort in having walls wrapped around you that your former beloved enjoyed and walked about in. That's exactly how I feel about this house...it was our Josh's home and we were a happy family together in it. The familiar is a safety net.

But like you...if the time comes that I must part from it I will move on...and most likely never look back. It's the real live people in our world that bring us comfort and joy...not the stuff they leave behind for us to mourn over in our role of guardians of their past.

You are a wise wise woman and an enterprising and evocative friend...I have always admired your boot strapping style and the most beautiful thing is that where ever you go...you have your most valuable prize with you...and that of course is your own sweet fierce self!

Oh...and NOT to leave out the 4 legged buddy's!

I wish you all success...maybe it's time to go out and join civilization again...they are in for a treat! emoticon



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SLIMLILA 1/24/2013 10:15PM

    Been behind on things lately, but came across this blog of yours that I had missed, and was so impressed. I have read a few others that people have written summarizing their last year more specifically, but yours was was awesome... I really enjoyed it. Guess that sorting and purging that I did in Aug. was part of what you talked about, getting rid of someone else's past. I know my mother is in a huge 15 room house, her dh died last March, so probably after this winter, she will have to make some decisions, bet you know how she feels. Like you said, there is no big hurry, take your time with what you need to, but I love the conclusion you have come to.

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SUSANNAH31 1/23/2013 11:08PM

    Thanks for writing about what has been happening with you this past year. I have thought of you often - and hoped all was going well for you.

Ah, for some words of wisdom to write here. What I can say is that you seem to have all the wisdom you need. Your decisions and the changes you are making sound like progress to me.

I'm happy for you that you are about to step off into a new life in a new place.

If I were a 3D friend of yours I would help you with your move and share in your planning. I would be toasting your good health and your weight loss and cheering you on in moving forward. I would visit you in your new location, wherever it was, and learn -along with you- about the new interesting possibilities and opportunities it offers. I would celebrate your new life with you.

But as I am limited to being an SP friend - let me just offer you my very best wishes. May this next chapter in your life build on the happiness of the past and bring you new adventures and pleasures in the future.

emoticon




P.S. Formerly known as PennyAn45





R>



Comment edited on: 1/23/2013 11:09:56 PM

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BETHGILLIGAN 1/21/2013 8:53PM

    I love this blog!! There's something about your writing that I find soothing, comforting no matter what you're writing about.
My, my, my! You have had quite a year. I totally hear you about the holidays. Since our kids are grown, we often spend Christmas day alone and always spend New Year's alone. I always dreaded when I would reach this time in life but, you know what? We've decided it's OK and even kind of nice to just have the quiet day.
I feel badly about your job at the candle place. You were so excited about that job and it's too bad it didn't work out. Sounds like the current job suits your needs so that is good!
It's always good to be in good health (and to have lost weight) but not good to be in poor financial health. Ever since your husband died, I know it's been a struggle for you financially. I have "worried" about you since then. Sounds like you are getting that under control and you always seem to "make do" with what you have. You are a strong woman!!
Now, I was surprised to see that you are thinking about selling but, you know what? I think that may be a very good thing for you. You have struggled long and hard to hang on to that house. Maybe it is time to let it go and start a new chapter in your life. (trite saying, I know) Get out from under the past so you can move forward a lot lighter physically and emotionally.
It sounds like it was time to let go of the old friend. Maybe another "drag" from the past? You deserve to be surrounded by people who value you, support you and care about your happiness and well being.
Sounds like 2013 is going to be another adventure for you. I'm hoping for more ups and fewer downs for you!!! Hugs!

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UUCEEJAY 1/20/2013 7:42PM

    So much of what you said resonates for me. Especially the part about " I realized just how much of this Stuff is the accumulation of other people's lives, and even though I wound up with it, I'm not its Designated Keeper." and needing to live in the now. My job will end this year and I need to make some decisions about what to do next. You have a lot of courage facing the issues head on. Too many people just put off making decisions and in the end someone else make them for them. emoticon emoticon

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ADARKARA 1/20/2013 8:05AM

    I know exactly what you mean about no longer feeling tied to a place. I lost my dad this August and now that he's gone, I no longer feel like I have to stay here. Which is good because it's expensive here.

Whatever you decide, do it for you, and not anyone else.

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AUTUMNBRZ 1/20/2013 7:22AM

    I am sending you a virtual HUG! (can you breathe? I am squeezing you very tight! ) emoticon

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UNIQDRGNFLY 1/19/2013 11:23PM

    Organizing thoughts! I love it! You have a unique way with words and I love to read your writings. Ever thought of writing a book???

Your wisdom helps a lot of people and I hope to see more! emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 1/19/2013 10:57PM

    I think you are doing great myself. You are in the process of defining who you are at this time in your life. It's not easy to have your life turned upside down.

I have found that when forced to be alone I am good company for myself as well. It's important to "plays well alone" as it is to "plays well with others". I always applaud using up food that is around as I hate waste and reading and rereading good books is always a good thing.

I have often said that if I needed to work again I would not return to my stress filled former position. Candle stores and EZ Marts sound great to me.

Good job on the health front. Losing 40 pounds is major!

Sounds like the finances are improving. Almost everyone I know is struggling in this economy.

It's funny about house attachment. I wondered if I would miss the homes I lived in growing up and, strangely enough, I don't have to miss them. I spend a lot of time in them in my dreams. I'm always surprised because I don't remember the details as well when I'm awake. I've wondered if I will stay here if my husband is gone and I don't know that I will. I have an attachment to this house and land but no relatives here other than my son and hubby and my friends have mostly moved away or plan to later on.

I lost a good friend years ago too. She moved away and we seemed to grow apart. We had less and less in common and the changes in her were not for the good. She became very critical of me and controlling. She searched for things to say to hurt me. It became apparent to me that this was not friendship.

I am also going through decades of stuff - mine and other - my sons, my hubby's, my deceased relatives. If I really love it, I keep it. If not, it goes.





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NORASPAT 1/19/2013 10:34PM

    Yes I read to the end, of course I would for you.
I realise you have a lot on your plate right now but I admire how you are taking it step by step. I do not want to even think about advising you in any way.
OUR kids are miles away and I hope we can be closer in distance but I think if we move away from here any of them might get a different job in another state. DH loves Maine so I stay here.

I have missed you. I am happy you are really thinking about your own future and where there will be support and happiness.
I am subscribed to your Blogs and I hope you are able to sort it all very soon. I am here for you anytime. HUGS Pat in Maine.

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SUZYMOBILE 1/19/2013 8:38PM

    The parts of your saga that mean the most to me are those having to do with living in the now and being completely honest with yourself--the latter a trait that you're never lacking in. Also the ability to let go and move on when it is time to do so. I don't see you weighed down with panic or overwhelming worry, as I would be. You DEAL, and you sort through the issues to determine what's really important and what can be let ride until another day.. It sure doesn't hurt that you have that all-important Health, which many people take for granted but is key to handling what life throws at you.

I think you should call American Pickers. I understand that they're real, and they'd love that barn of yours!

emoticon , Karen! I'm glad you've got Internet again, so that you could blog at length!

Comment edited on: 1/19/2013 8:39:29 PM

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JANEDOE12345 1/19/2013 8:34PM

    I read every word.
I am so glad you are back.
That's all I have to say from here.

Zennily,

Pam

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ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 1/19/2013 8:10PM

    Thank you! I am always glad when you are on Spark People because I care about you ina way that I do not care about those loud, braying extroverted real life people. You have been brave and candid and hard working and true to yourself.

Yes, of course I had to hang on to the end.

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LIZZIE888 1/19/2013 7:48PM

  I loved reading this. Thank you for your candour and for sharing it all.  There is so much I want to say - about what you're going through, your resolve and determination, about what life throws at you at different times and of course about me (!) - but I'll spare you my tedious pontification.

I wish I lived near so could pop by for tea...  or that I could pixelate myself and travel through the internet.  I think we would have a lot to share.  Knowing my luck I'd stay pixelated and everyone would assume I was in the witness protection programme. 

Keep with it. You're doing really well.  It's also later than you think and you need to get moving.



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AWESOMECAROL55 1/19/2013 7:46PM

    I hung on to the end too....thanks for the great insight. It's as you said when you stopped by my page to give me a goodie.... As long as we learn from our experience! Here's to a new year, a new beginning, and continued growth! Thanks for sharing....glad you are back!

Carol

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BIRDLSLAURIE 1/19/2013 6:45PM

    I hung in there to the end because I find you to be insightful and I get it. You are taking charge of your life and you are inspiring. As long as we are moving forward there is hope. As long as there is hope, well, that's everything. Good luck to you.

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_UMAMI_ 1/19/2013 6:24PM

    Ma'am, you've only got ten years on me, but you're a helluva Wise Woman.

I think it's great that circumstances didn't just take things away from you, but opened up new lines of vision. And I like your way of addressing life, not watching the rear view mirror, but enjoying the path as it unfurls.

Change is exciting, and can be good for us---not just scary.

Nice blog, and wonderful to hear an update from you!
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p.s. I hate people who have to be Right (afraid I am sometimes one). I do try to stand by the "let's agree to disagree" principle in general.




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VALERIEMAHA 1/19/2013 5:25PM

    WOW! I love catching up on your fascinating and ever-undulating life with you. Thanks for the red suitcase...wish I had one like that!!!

Bright blessings to YOU!
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Maha

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SLIMMERJESSE 1/19/2013 5:25PM

    Wow, I've missed you a lot, and tried to reach out a few times. Will reread and comment again. Big hug.

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EWL978 1/19/2013 4:39PM

    Hello....I DID read all the way to the bottom....seems to me as though you've got a good handle on your situation. Living alone without the possibility of that changing soon is not only lousy, but unhealthy.

If you're able to sell, you'll need to have a better handle on where you'll go...it's a double edged sword that you need to consider carefully. One thing you don't want to do is to take all that "stuff" with you, and believe me, it IS STUFF!! To some it might be worth money, to others it's nothing but junk.

You take care and I hope it works out for you and soon, too!

Keep on keeping on...at least you have a place to debrief and let others who may care in on it.

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