RUTHXG   44,804
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I need to be two or three people.

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

Really, the next few days hold WAY more than I can do. I probably won't get to exercise, except fast walking to & from the train & bus.

1. finish potting herbs on the back porch--too many of them have died because they weren't getting enough water/sun inside the house
2. put clean sheets on bed
3. get last dry clothes from dryer & bring all clean laundry upstairs
4. pack for St. Louis, including poems to revise & books to read on the bus
5. store dried sage that I picked off the dead plant--it smells yummy
6. get to work EARLY Thursday to have enough time to meet a deadline
7. attend fascinating discussion Thursday night, which was planned weeks ago--& I earnestly promised to attend, & I want to!
8. [before leaving for work early] pack some extra food tomorrow since fascinating discussion won't include supper & there won't be time to stop by home
9. get to work EARLY on Friday b/c I have to leave early to catch the megabus to St. Louis!
10. continue reviewing student papers--when???
11. lavish attention on my beautiful granddaughter
12. figure out how not to feel guilty & harassed because I'm neglecting one necessary thing in order to do another necessary thing . . .

Yeah, friends, please forgive me for being just one very limited person! I won't be around much for a few days . . . emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 6/2/2011 1:06PM

    we'll miss you! hope you get everything checked off!

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SEAWAVE 6/2/2011 12:29PM

    You do have a full plate. Just focus on *the next most important thing*, and when that's done do it again. I'm way behind you -- I haven't even cleared last year's herbs in the garden, and the new ones are already growing.

Oh well, we can only do what we can do!

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RUTHXG 6/2/2011 11:01AM

    I forgot--there's another one!

13. deposit assessment checks & write quick treasury report for my building neighbors--I'm the treasurer this year (I didn't volunteer--it's my turn) & am missing the meeting Sunday night because of my St. Louis trip!

Thanks for all the kind words, friends!

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BEATLETOT 6/2/2011 8:49AM

    A gajillion things...but some of them are quick, so that's good! Crossing them off your to-do list will give you so much momentum!

I hope you're doing well, in spite (or maybe because) of being busy!

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CZARINA_TV 6/2/2011 8:30AM

    You're busy, but that sounds like good busy to me! Have fun!

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SGILBER6 6/2/2011 8:23AM

    That DOES sound very busy! But you can do it and a lot of the stuff seems active anyway so don't fret too much about not getting exercise in!

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JECKIE 6/2/2011 8:14AM


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CTEMPLE 6/2/2011 1:14AM

    Ruthie if that was my list I would start crossing out, doing too much is one of my stress triggers. Have a good time with Bea.

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SHANSHE 6/1/2011 11:06PM

    Shew! Take a deep breath and I will be praying or you and hope you get more done than you thought you could.

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REMODELINGPAT 6/1/2011 10:47PM

    emoticonBack when I was part of the working world, I told my supervisor we needed to put me on the copier and run off 2 or 3 duplicates...then I could get my work caught up...We never did figure out how to do that! emoticonHang in there...You WILL make it...and you will feel so proud of your achievements!

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CLAYARTIST 6/1/2011 10:45PM

  hang in there...

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Rewards this weekend

Friday, May 27, 2011

I have planned two fun treats for myself this weekend . . . not because I have met a particular goal, but to treat myself with kindness as I walk the painful path of divorce.

1. Tomorrow I'll have my first ever salon facial! There's a special at an Aveda salon about 1.5 miles from me--$25 for a 30-minute facial--& I have a $25 Spafinder certificate, so it's time to use it. I'll walk to the salon as part of my exercise for the day. I'm really looking forward to it.

2. I will take Sunday as an actual whole day of rest instead of squeezing in some freelance work. And sometime in the afternoon, weather permitting, I'm going to take my new tent out into the backyard & practice setting it up. I'd like to get the hang of it so well that if I land in a campground after dark some night this summer, I'll be able to put it up by feel.

There's a third treat too--a cookout at my sister's in the evening of Memorial Day. That will be a reward for spending most of that day marking up my students' projects. (My sister & I will also visit our parents' graves at a cemetery near her home.) I'm going to take along a veggie grilling tray & a bunch of cut-up sweet peppers, mushrooms, onions, & maybe brussels sprouts to roast over the coals alongside the meat my brother-in-law prepares. Yum!

Peace to you on this Memorial Day weekend!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CZARINA_TV 5/29/2011 10:15AM

    That sounds like a great weekend plan. Enjoy it!

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/28/2011 11:53AM

    Have fun! You deserve this!

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SHANSHE 5/28/2011 11:31AM

    I think a weekend of rewarding and taking care of yourself is oh so wise and beneficial to make you feel better in the midst of your pain. YOU, oh Ruth, are soooo wise and many of us would do well to follow your example! :)

Enjoy every part of your weekend, even marking students papers and just soak in the beauty all around you, including yourself!

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JATHUENER 5/28/2011 9:27AM

    oh your plans sounds wonderful so have a good day

P.S. about setting up the tent one time we left to go camping got there could handle the dark brought a flashlight but did not have a rain poncho it came down fast and we were drench by the time we got to shelter so i kept one just incase from then on. May not need it that often but if and when you do you will be happy you have it.

have fun--julie

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SEAWAVE 5/28/2011 8:55AM

    Sounds like a great week-end... Have fun!

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KRISTA64 5/28/2011 8:42AM

    Very good plan!! Enjoy!

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CTEMPLE 5/27/2011 10:35PM


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Melting away the spasm

Monday, May 23, 2011

No public transport OR driving this morning . . . I did my 30-Day Shred routine first thing, & partway through I noticed that my back muscles around the left scapula were kinda hurting. I pressed through & finished with stretches, but the pain didn't go away. It got more intense after shower & breakfast, so that leaning over or doing things with either left or right arms was really hurting.

I decided to take a sick day & get a massage at a day spa in my neighborhood. It isn't open till noon, so in the meantime I got myself set up on the sofa with a firm pillow behind me propping a heating pad in place. I watched Au Revoir Les Enfants, my Netflix film that had been languishing on top of my TV, & the heat felt really good. Turned it off after a while--& my back was MUCH better.

I asked for just the "express" 25-minute neck/shoulder/back massage, but my masseuse didn't have anyone immediately after me & gave me more like 45 minutes--so kind of her. She used some wonderful essential oils at the end, along with hot towels. Now I'm fragrant & relaxed & my shoulder blade area is almost back to normal!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CTEMPLE 5/25/2011 1:34AM

    Happy ending!

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CZARINA_TV 5/24/2011 10:53AM

    Good for you! I'm glad you could fix it right away...

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4LEEFCLOVER 5/24/2011 12:16AM

    I need to follow your example! Thanks for sharing this. Self care is a necessary habit. Way to go!

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SWEETNSKINNY 5/23/2011 11:02PM

    So glad you were able to take care of it and get better!!! Your massage sounds fabulous.

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SHANSHE 5/23/2011 9:11PM

    I am glad you are feeling better and soooo glad you were able to take a sick day and take care of yourself and even indulge in a needed massage!

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BEATLETOT 5/23/2011 7:32PM

    I'm really jealous, too! I wanna take a sick day at the spa! Unfortunately, my work makes us bring a doctor's note for even one day!

Next time I go to Peru, I'm going to have another spa day. I got a six hour spa day for, like, $130 there last time!

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KAREN_NY 5/23/2011 7:12PM

    Love the you could so immediately get what you needed. Excellent!

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/23/2011 6:54PM

    Wow you were way more productive than I ever am on a sick day! Sorry to hear about your spasms but I'm glad you're feeling better!

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JECKIE 5/23/2011 6:00PM

    That sounds so nice! I haven't had a massage in ages. Good for taking care of yourself!

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AMYLONGHORN 5/23/2011 4:48PM

    OMG that sounds *awesome*!! I'm glad your back is feeling better, and I'm totally jelly of your sick day! LOL

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Paying someone else to worry

Friday, May 20, 2011

I sat down with my lawyer this morning & handed over the case to her. I have some jobs to do--completing the disclosure, hunting down documentation connected to the purchase of my condo--but she is going to do the main work. My boss had told me, "Get a good lawyer & then don't worry about it. That's what you're paying the lawyer to do." Actually the attorney won't worry too much; she reduced her usual retainer for me because "this is not a complicated case." I'm so thankful for that.

I had to get up early this a.m. & skip exercise to get to the lawyer's office--but then I made up for it after my appointment by walking about a mile to the CTA center to pick up my new transport card. (I thought I lost my old one . . . after I requested a new one, I found it just where it should have been, where I had looked several times! Is that a sign of stress or what?) Then I walked nearly a mile to State Street to catch my bus to work.

I think I'm going to set up a new "other goal" for myself here on SP: take public transport to work. I need to break the habit of staying up late & then needing to drive to work to save time in the morning. When I drive, I pollute more, plus I miss the downtime on the train & bus to read, pray, & write. This morning I got some good work done on a new poem.

One more thing: after eating my lunch today, I felt a bit unsatisfied & thought about going downstairs for a candy bar. Then I reminded myself, "Tomorrow is weigh-in day! I want to be able to record the weight I lost this week!" So I restrained myself. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JATHUENER 5/28/2011 9:12AM

    great to hear about the good lawyer that is good news

oh taking the bus or train sub etc i think that is a good way to relax and read my magazine work a puzzle or something in route but do understand must get going in the morning to do that brings back the memories of trying to catch the school bus every morning because if you missed it the had to tell parents and then they had to beg to get a lift

proud did not give in to temptation i would have no matter what that is a good to hear and we are proud of you


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CZARINA_TV 5/24/2011 10:52AM

    I love taking the subway -- I get time to myself... I can't imagine driving to work!

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SASSACAIA 5/23/2011 3:31PM

    Good for you, Ruth! This must be such a huge weight lifted from your shoulders! And yay for good public transport! That's so great that you can do that for yourself and the environment! emoticon emoticon

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PJBOKC 5/22/2011 10:26PM

    Sounds like a good plan for time utilization, and doing something for yourself. You need that!


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CTEMPLE 5/20/2011 9:34PM

    So good to hear you're feeling more positive. Your boss is right, try to think about the divorce as little as possible. Nothing can be done.

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SHANSHE 5/20/2011 7:38PM

    Good for you for hiring a good lawyer to take care of things for you and to "worry" in your place.

Sounds like you are doing good...


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SEAWAVE 5/20/2011 7:34PM

    I'm hoping to be able to take public transport, or even bike partway, once my stamina is back up. Actually, biking would be my preference, as most of the way from my DH's work would be on beautiful bike paths along the river and canal.

I have also been thinking about tomorrow's weigh-in. I somehow lost 3 lbs overnight (I weigh myself every day) and I'm hoping it will keep until tomorrow!

Go emoticon

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BEATLETOT 5/20/2011 7:19PM

    I stopped taking it to work because DC Metro is SO unreliable! Now, I drive unless the roads are icy. I miss reading on the Metro, but I listen to books on CD now, so I don't feel like I'm missing too much.

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/20/2011 5:51PM

    I miss taking the train/subway/bus to work! It was always so nice to be able to read or knit, which I definitely can't do on the freeways in Los Angeles! emoticon emoticon

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From the sublime to the paranoid

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

"Repeated acts of mental cruelty."

I was served papers today at my workplace, by a sheriff! And besides the normal grounds of irreconcilable differences, they include an accusation that I repeatedly inflicted mental cruelty on my husband.

Now I know that I'm dealing with someone who is seriously disturbed. My boss thinks his purpose is to milk me for some money (after he freeloaded for years & left me in nasty debt). All of this scares me, but I am enlisting the help of a good lawyer & the support of my family & my church community.

So I've had to descend from the sublimity of my weekend with Bea & my son & daughter-in-law into some serious soap-opera-level ugliness. Please pray with me, friends, that we'll all have wisdom to respond well to this & that truth & justice will prevail. I am heading for bed & will rest in the arms of God's love.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SASSACAIA 5/23/2011 3:33PM

    What?? Really??? Wow... am I glad you got a lawyer to let someone else have to think about this! Ugh - I'm so sorry you're going through this ugly mess. Yuck.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PJBOKC 5/22/2011 10:22PM


I'll definitely be praying for you! Will send you a note soon.

emoticon emoticon and encouragement to you!


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BABY_GIRL69 5/18/2011 7:39PM

    People can cruel men & women alike. I think its something to do with control or he has a personality disorder? Who knows? He wants something from you & he is getting it by putting all the pressure & burden on you. Keep close with your family & friends & church family. You will definitely need them. Definitely praying for you. . . .

God bless & enjoy everyday!


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SHANSHE 5/18/2011 3:57PM

    Gee, that is something else! I will be praying Ruth!

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EYES_ON_THEPRAZ 5/18/2011 11:49AM

    Wow... that is crazy! Sounds really petty to me and definitely like someone just looking to squeeze every dime out of you!
You are awesome and I hope your lawyer rips his "case" to shreds.
i'll be thinking of you :) emoticon

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KRISTA64 5/18/2011 11:48AM

    God's Blessing to you... (((hugs)))

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BEATLETOT 5/18/2011 11:34AM

    Wow...from Kant to Kafka.

Anybody who has ever met you--even from afar and virtually--can tell within seconds that you are incapable of inflicting mental cruelty on anyone. Any divorce court and attorney is going to see the same thing.

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JECKIE 5/18/2011 10:53AM


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CTEMPLE 5/18/2011 4:00AM

    Ruth what a pain. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this.

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