Thursday, April 21, 2011
As some of you know, since early January I've been on isoniazid, an anti-TB med, because I've been TB positive since childhood (exposure in southern Colombia, but never an active case) but had never been on the drug. I have to take it for 9 months & avoid alcohol during the whole course of medication.
There are numerous possible side effects; the drug can be hard on one's liver, which is why I have to be a teetotaler while taking it. A nicer possible side effect is weight loss. I'm thinking it may have helped me finish well in the first 5% challenge in January.
During the more recent challenge, as noted in my 4/15 blog post, I started to lose weight but then lost focus because of all the different big events in my life. This past weekend I was away visiting my granddaughter, & on Monday, my final weigh-in for the challenge showed me up something like 0.4 lb over my beginning weight--so as predicted, my challenge results were a wash.
What's interesting to me is that since Monday morning I have not been very careful with eating, yet I have LOST a little weight. Tuesday I had a big breakfast & a smallish lunch; in the evening I was at an event where there were trays of food--fruit, cheese, crackers--& I grazed before & after; then some of us went out for a late supper & I had a large slice of Giordano's pizza! I had told my Colombian guest that he needed to try Chicago-style pizza, which is just embarrassingly thick & cheese-laden, with a thick crust-rim. Jesus Emilio had fun tasting it, but he gave up once he was halfway through--he's a little sparrow of a guy (but strong--a hardworking farmer) & didn't have room for the rest. But I happily ate every bite of mine.
And Wednesday I ate pretty substantial meals & indulged in THREE sweet snacks. And I haven't had time for vigorous exercise for a whole week. Yet today my weight is down a bit.
It must be the meds, right?
So I need to take advantage of this. Not to continue eating lots of desserts & gooey pizza, but to get back into a modest rhythm of eating & regular exercise so that I can lose these 11-12 lbs & get to goal weight!
It would be silly to waste the opportunity.
Friday, April 15, 2011
I think my weigh-in is going to be a wash--that is, I will probably be around the same weight as when I started the 5% challenge that ends tomorrow. That's still down a nice chunk from where I was last fall, & I'm still feeling the difference in my clothes. Yay for looser pants!
Somehow these past 8 weeks have been terribly, terribly busy--I guess it's not surprising, with Bea's birth + a new teaching gig + my daughter's crisis + regular PT for TMJ on top of my already-large pile of responsibilities & relationships. It can't go on this way indefinitely. If I need to slow down debt repayment in order to keep a more human pace of life, I will do that.
I find myself just longing for a monastery, a place where I can sit in front of a fire or walk through a forest WITH NO AGENDA except rest & prayer & silence. I'm going to schedule a day-long personal retreat soon (there's a Catholic retreat center not far from my home, near Lake Michigan & the meandering lakefront trails). A camping weekend will be heavenly too--even if it rains. Falling down in the mud--yay!
So these past 8 weeks I have been erratic about tracking food, & at times I've had to skip exercise several days in a row. Right now I'm stealing time from my work--practically anytime I go on SP I'm stealing time from work, either at home or in the office. But I'm going to stay involved: I'm signed up for the upcoming challenge already, & between now & then I'm going to keep working out & eating properly.
When the next 5% challenge starts, I will have started my divorce process; I am going to start working on that the week after Easter Sunday. It's a grim undertaking, but at least the days are getting longer & more flowers will be blooming by then--I'll be surrounded every day by reminders of the earth's renewal. My life is undergoing renewal too!
Thursday, April 07, 2011
But exercise is really hard to find time for when I'm truly behind in my work. Tonight I elected to stay up late working, though that means I won't be able to get up in time to exercise tomorrow morning.
And food tracking would have been too time consuming, since tonight I took my friend to a wonderful vegan restaurant & I ate "chicken legs" made of soy & wouldn't have any idea how to track them. They were fabulous, though! I will have leftovers tomorrow.
Good news: the TMJ pain in my right jaw is practically gone!
Bad news: I'm now having TMJ pain in my LEFT jaw!
It makes eating very painful (which should help me lose more weight, but so far it hasn't). Clearly my jaw alignment has shifted, & I'm confident that my physical therapist can help me get it where it should be.
This is a portentous time of year for me: yesterday was my 8th wedding anniversary--preceded by a few e-mails in which my soon-to-ex & I discussed the fact that later this month I'll be filing for divorce--& Friday April 8 will be the 1st anniversary of my dad's death. Also the news about my grandbaby is that somehow she has not been getting enough nutrition, though her parents have been doing everything right--of course that's worrying! They will now be supplementing nursing with regular bottle feeding, both pumped breast milk & formula. I hope to go visit them either Palm Sunday or Easter weekend.
I'm doing OK with all this, as in not falling apart, & I am grounded in God's love, but deep inside I'm feeling disappointed/sad (about the loss of my marriage), sad/lonely (about the loss of my dad), & worried (about Baby Bea & her parents). No wonder there's not a lot of room to focus on eating right & exercising. I will be back on course shortly, though, because I'm determined to take good care of myself!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
This morning the scales show that I have landed in the 150s--yippeeee!
Now the question is, can I make my 5% goal by April 16? I still have 4.8 lbs to go, & just over two weeks. That's a faster rate than usual for me. It would require stepping up my efforts, both exercise & eating/tracking. But it's SO REWARDING to make a goal by the deadline!
I'm going to try! I just redeemed some debit-card points & received a $25 Spafinder certificate. If I make 154.8 lbs by 4/16, I'll make an appointment for a massage to celebrate!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Yesterday I did take that 3.25-mile brisk walk to Evanston. The forecast showed light snow throughout the day, so I was wearing my trusty Bearpaw boots. Not good! I saw not one snowflake all day, & by the time I got well into Evanston I could tell blisters were forming. The boots are very comfy but not designed for tromping long distances on hard sidewalks.
After the poetry workshop, on the way to the dance performance a few blocks away I stopped at a Whole Foods to buy some bandages. I confess that I took off boots & socks while waiting for the show to begin, & after it began, to put bandages on the heels & balls of my feet! Fortunately I wasn't sitting right up next to anyone. Then a friend offered me a ride home after the performance--that helped too. Today I've still got bandages on, & I took a break from cardio exercise. I wore my athletic shoes to work for max cushioning. Later I plan to do an upper-body ST routine here in my office.
The poetry workshop was a really good one, by the way, & the dance show was WONDERFUL. The movement & music brought tears to my eyes more than once. I realized that despite all the therapy I've been doing for months, I have been protecting myself from the pain of my marriage breakup. Sometimes art that involves no words is the best for dismantling my inner defenses. And I think I'm ready for them to come down.
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