I think I was so unsure of getting to the goal - I never thought about the "after"!
I've been thinking about what happens after we reach our goals? What happens after the race is over? The wedding dress we squeezed ourselves into is moved to the back of the closet? Or we have a baby (and get to our pre-pregnancy weight)?
I've done all these things- I trained and was focused to complete a marathon, I was diligent about fitting into my wedding dress (although the irony is that the closer you get to the wedding the more obsess you become at NOT losing weight because bringing a dress in and buying new undergarments is just as bad as outgrowing the dress) and a month after giving birth I was 5 lbs away from my pre-pregnancy weight (okay I didn't technically reach pre-pregnancy weight but believe me close enough!).
The problem...after every goal the focus waned and what I thought were "lifestyle" changes started to shift and fall away like a house of cards. They turned out to be what I term "under the gun strategies" all used to get to the goal but not a true change. Which is hard to accept as some of those changes lasted months and months!
What do we do once the pressure and thrill of meeting a goal is removed? I believe I'm moving towards figuring that out for myself and with this in mind while setting my current goals - I want to try and remember this and plan accordingly.
Short term goal:
1. Be pre-pregnancy weight by July 1st (Andrew's first birthday).
I'm 274.7lbs today and will be striving for 246lbs (so 29lbs in 3 months)-yup you read that right - a month after he was born I was close to this weight (lost over 40+lbs that I had gained during the pregnancy -he was 10lbs when born and a cutie!
but atlast my love affair with quick food, no sleep and general what to do after "achieving my goal" set in and 8 months later I'm up 29lbs...
2. Run again (any race) recovering from plantar fasciitis has been extremely hard and a long process (it was caused by pregancy and wearing flip flops...ugh wear supportive shoes is all I can suggest)- but I think my right foot is getting better and I have the green light to slowly start jogging again- here I am on my first run in a loooong time...I ran a mile in 16 minutes last weekend while Dad took Andrew to the park...
(I paid for the mile due to some simple mistakes- I did not stretch enough or tape my foot before the run- I will from now on :)
I have a slow build up to a 10K in mid-June
3. Come up with one thing that is a true lifestyle change- work in progress
4. Do some things I normally have been shying away from as I've started to regress to being a homebody due to being frustrated at gaining weight and feeling uncomfortable with myself...
If anyone has any advice on shifting from getting to goal and maintaining once there- feel free to chime in
So it's been a long time since I have blogged (almost a year) and a few things have changed :)
(here he is picking out his first library book!)
I'm here to say that you can actually lose weight (gain a normal amount while pregnant) and come out 4 weeks after delivering being the same post-baby weight.
I was surprised that my hard work was not for nothing and I had a cute new friend to boot!
Then transitioning back to work, discovering the challenges of breastfeeding, an unexpected case of plantar fasciitis and lack of sleep can nudge that scale back up a little :(
So now that I have taken a deep breath and started to get my bearing with my "new" life- it's time to continue my healthy journey!
Not sure how consistent I will be on the blogging front but I figure I need to start somewhere (right?...right!).
So here I am today stepping back into the frame of photos ( I like any new mom take tons of photos of Andrew) and being an active part of my life. It will be hard to remember to change out of my comforty yoga pants, take a shower, eat regular meals and carve out the time to focus on my health and exercise.
Looking forward to checking in with everyone and getting back to my marathon running weight! More discussions on goals and how to get to them later.
So up until a couple of weeks ago I felt like no one could tell I was pregnant. I just felt uncomfortable and thought I looked overweight.
I won't lie- I was sad. And had major baby bump envy as I walked around and noticed other pregnant women.
Then I stopped by the store to try and find some pants-the ones I have I thought I would just keep using with the belly band. I tried the belly band and it just kept riding up and I felt really uncomfortable (plus I had the feeling that I looked like a stuffed sausage!).
So I decided to just buy some bigger sized pants (I resisted this long as I just didn't want to even try and guess what size they would be-but I felt just like if I was gaining weight and not baby and continued to wear clothes that didn't fit it would depress me-and in fact it has been making feel bad to stress every morning when I went to get ready for work and knew nothing would really "fit").
Well, in the dressing room I happened to glance in the mirror while wearing clothes that actually fit me and there it was....my baby bump that in no way could be confused with "just gaining weight and being overweight"!!!!!
I'm so excited that it was there! And I'm glad that I found some clothes that fit and was so happy that they fit and I felt comfortable that I couldn't care less what size they were!
For anyone who believes in wives tales- I am in fact "carrying high" and having a boy- so maybe that one is right.
So far I have gained 13lbs. I was on medication for nausea/vomiting up until 2 weeks ago and once that went away and I could actually eat - well I picked up the weight that had not been there before (I think I've gained 6lbs in these last 2 weeks).
Now that I have gotten back into normal eating and have settled into my new job ( I switched jobs 3 weeks ago to one that makes a little more money then my last job but the real reason I took the position is that it offered a hybrid work schedule-so I can work a couple days a week in the office and the rest at home-so I can be home with Andrew some days (with help as my job requires about 80% of my time to be on the phone with clients- but still I liked that I would be home with him as I will have a short maternity leave and wanted the option-something that my other job that had me traveling 50% of time could not allow).
My current goals are to:
-actually track my food
-be more diligent about making healthy choices
-try to get some exercise in at least 3 times a week
Whew! I am glad to report that I am healthy and still plugging away at things but it has been hard! A lot more then I would have thought when started on this journey of pregnancy!
Here's my little peanut at 11 weeks (I'm 16 weeks today!) We are having a little boy that we have named Andrew!
My first 3 months were rough! I have been (and still am on) medication for nausea and vomiting. I actually take more medicine/pills then when I wasn't pregnant! I have the nausea medicine (thank god for it!), heartburn pills, stool softener, some Tylenol for back pain and I was trying Unisom (but atlas I just do not sleep as well as I used to - regardless of medications or how tired I actually am).
Everything about my body and what I considered "normal" is a distance memory- its all so different now. I look and feel different. What I didn't expect was the constant worry about the most random things! And it's nonstop worry and concern- I'm sure it's normal.
In fact any symptom I have short of death seems to be "normal for pregnancy"!
We have had all the tests you could have by 16 weeks and everything has come back normal and I am so thankful and happy for that! It's odd but sometimes I actually forget that I am pregnant- I can't wait until I'm 7 or 8 months along and it's apparent there's a baby in here and I can readily hear a heartbeat with the little monitor a friend bought me!
Here's a picture of me today. It's crazy but I am actually the same weight I was 16 weeks ago when I became pregnant. While scale shows the same number my stomach area is definitely different and I notice a little side bump (plus I feel like Dolly Pardon of late!). I actually lost 6 lbs in my first couple of months and have slowly been gaining it back. I was so sick and had horrible food aversions in the beginning.
It has all evened out though and I am looking forward to keeping up the healthy habits I have been sticking to- It helps that Andrew hates sweets (especially chocolate -if I eat even a little I'm in the bathroom) and he also loves fruits (sadly all I want are summer fruits at the moment-apples and kiwi fruits have become my good friends lately but I can not wait for some fresh, cold watermelon and ripe cherries!).
Basically spotty of late. I was so exhausted in the beginning and had issues needing a bathroom close at hand that I kind of just gave up on my exercise streak. Then I became lazy and had no motivation to even go outside for a walk (which was the bulk of what I was doing towards the end anyways).
Well that's just not acceptable and I am going back on a streak of at least 30 minutes a day. Today was Day 1 (I'm hoping to go longer than my last streak of 155 days total).
Day 1 of ?: 30 minutes on the elliptical (it was hard and I felt way out of shape!). I'm sure near the end of my pregnancy I will just be walking but for now I think the elliptical and swimming will be my main choices.
Life in general Update:
Is going great! I'm excited about what is to come and have been feeling much better lately. I hope to blogging more and keeping up on everyone's great start to the new year!
I have been doing well this week (as in no weight gain). My goal is to stay within my doctor's recommended weight gain of 0-3 lbs for the first trimester. Since I'm at 246 at 5'6" with a BMI of 39 my suggested weight gain is 11-20lbs for the whole pregnancy.
The first 3 months, I am focused on eating better (by better I have been eating well for awhile but I think eating Luna bars for breakfast might not be the best choice so I have packed up all my easy foods that are more on the processed side and have tried to eat better by cooking eggs or having a bagel). And to continue to exercise consistently- I'm on day 152 in a row today!!!
It is odd to be in a type of "maintenance phase" for the next couple of months. I have been so focused on losing weight that it is hard to shift gears and think beyond it. I have added some calories (about 300 daily) but other then that not much has changed and in a way I am glad as it seems like a lot of things are changing lately.
Hoping to get more runs in this week (tried last week but went to the gym instead on a couple of "training days" as I was just feeling lazy)- although with a storm traveling up the east coast I might get washed indoors this week!