ROXYZMOM   74,479
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Update on My Son...

Friday, November 29, 2013

I know many of you have been praying for my son.

Tuesday's blood work didn't come back good. His creatinine level was at 6. This is a sign of major kidney problems. My son used to panic when it hit 3, now he thinks the lab messed up. So, he went back for a retest this morning - yes, he procrastinated! He is ignoring the Dr's request to go to the hospital. The Dr told my husband if his lab work comes back the same today he is going to demand admittance.

He is not speaking to my husband because my husband told him he needs to go in to treatment and we will not be helping with his car insurance bill next month unless he is in treatment for his eating disorder. My two sons are now not speaking over an Xbox purchase -- and his brother's patience is worn out!

I took him out to lunch and mentioned a medication he could take for his OCD which is the root of his problems. His response "I told you not to talk about it". Mine "too bad, you need to know what will help".

He changed the subject. I just keep throwing things in here and there!

On the up side, he ate half a large Philly Cheesesteak and lot of fries. It's the most I have seen him eat in a long time.

So, we are still on limbo!

Thanks again for your concern, prayers and support!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAREN_NY 12/4/2013 3:44PM

    Thinking of you and praying for your health and his.

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WONDERGALE 12/2/2013 11:46PM

    Kidney problems are nothing to play with. The doctors kept calling my brother in law to come in because his tests showed he needed treatment for his kidneys. He ignored the doctors. He went to the hospital one night for a totally unrelated problem and almost died. His kidneys failed him and he went into a coma. He's alright now, but will be on dialysis for the rest of his life. Ask your son how he feels about dialysis? Praying for you and your family.

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KAYWEB555 12/2/2013 8:50AM

    Knowing what is best for you doesn't always mean that we can see it. Just like those of us that need and know that we need to lose weight for a healthy body, we continue to feed our inner child.
My prayers continue to come your way, hoping that once he gets the blood report and it is still to high he will consent to being admitted for help. May God walk with you during this difficult time .

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SPAMUNDY 11/30/2013 9:28AM

    I'm glad you got him to eat, it'll keep him going for a little while. He will be in my thoughts and prayers. emoticon

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MWWENSIN 11/30/2013 8:34AM

    This is a problem that has been going on for a long time so it's not going to go away soon. I'm glad he has previously shown some signs of improvement. I'll keep praying for you and your family.

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OVERWORKEDJANET 11/30/2013 6:23AM

    Tough spot to be in. Good luck. I know it hurts.

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LIZALOT 11/30/2013 6:02AM

    hugs from here. you are doing all you can, and i so hope he realises this and accepts he needs treatment.



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CASTIRONLADY 11/29/2013 9:10PM

    I am praying for all your family healing and comfort.

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REBBLTX 11/29/2013 8:25PM

    Here is a link for resources here on sparkpeople:

http://www.spar
kpeople.com/resource/health_a-z
_detail.asp?AZ=32

I hope you'll be able to find some help there :)

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FIT4MEIN2013 11/29/2013 7:54PM

    Prayer said!

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CHUBBY_MOM 11/29/2013 7:15PM

    Thinking of you and your family! emoticon

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SHERYLP461 11/29/2013 5:30PM

    I hope he comes to a realization before much longer.

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TERI-RIFIC 11/29/2013 4:19PM

    You have my continued prayers.One of the best quotes I've ever read on parenthood is: "Once you become a parent your heart goes walking around outside your body for the rest of your life." Hang in there and I'm glad there was some good news that your son did eat. emoticon

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KRISZTA11 11/29/2013 4:11PM

    emoticon

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CYCLINGSANDY 11/29/2013 3:28PM

    High creative levels showed my hubby's kidney failure before they completely shut down. It is sad to know he does not have to be sick. I am praying he gets admitted to get some help.
May God give you peace and wisdom in the midst of this storm.

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MBTEPP 11/29/2013 3:22PM

    Keep hangin' in there. Use whatever leverage you can to get him motivated in the right direction. Something will click, and when it does, you will be there to support him 100%. My prayers are with you. Stay strong.

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 11/29/2013 2:57PM

    emoticon emoticon

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PEZMOM1 11/29/2013 2:32PM

    Praying for your son and the rest of the family.

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FIRECOM 11/29/2013 2:27PM

    I am in a terminal cancer condition right now so I think I understand some of the frustration he is going through.

My prayers are coming his way. Hang in there Mom.

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Another Week In Review...

Monday, November 25, 2013

I did great last week with my food and portion control. I made a couple new spark cookbook recipes. I brought samples into work. I didn't do as good with fitness minutes which is why I lost 1 pound.

I have been going through boxes I never unPacked since I moved three years ago. I am giving stuff away like crazy. I did find a tennis bracelet and two diamond rings I had hidden.

My bathroom and guest bathroom drawers are now all lined and organized. I found a $100 gift certificate to brookstone and ordered a mini fridge for my bathroom coffee bar (I have a coffee bar in my bathroom - yeah, I am spoiled!)

I finished going through my closet and have three big bags ready for good will.
I took tons of stuff to work for whoever wants it - most is gone.

I find cleaning very de-stressing. It's such a great feeling to me.
My son's bloodwork is up a little bit and he is going to the Dr every week. My doctor is still pushing my son to go to an ED treatment center. I pray he will decide to go.

Thank you very much for your prayers and support. It means the world to me!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CKTALL 11/29/2013 3:15PM

    Stay the course with your son

He will thank you in the end

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SABLENESS 11/27/2013 7:59PM

    Add bookshelves and you'd have my ideal bathroom! Happy Thanksgiving, my friend.

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CYCLINGSANDY 11/27/2013 5:00PM

    Glad you gave this update on your son. He has been on my mind several times at random times of my days. I am still praying God changes his motivation to go to that ED center.

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SUNSHINE20113 11/27/2013 3:07PM

    It sounds like you are finding some amazing things!

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NEWKATHYNOW 11/26/2013 11:24PM

    Such a relief to hear you had a better week. I'm still cleaning out things too. It makes me feel so much better. I understand it is supposed to help ease depression as well. Have a great Thanksgiving and enjoy yourself!

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MWWENSIN 11/26/2013 5:25PM

    Glad to hear your week went well.

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SPARKLED146 11/26/2013 4:30PM

    It's inspiring to read about your cleaning! I must do the same!

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MBTEPP 11/26/2013 11:41AM

    Baby steps. Your son is making progress. Your clensing your soul and doing a darn good job. Keep the faith. Ive been there.

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KIMPY225 11/26/2013 11:39AM

    That is great you did some unpacking! Hopefully it did help you de-stress a little bit!

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IFDEEVARUNS2 11/26/2013 7:55AM

    You are a declutter demon! I should take lessons.
Glad to hear your son is relatively stable. emoticon

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 11/25/2013 11:38PM

    emoticon

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COFFEELS 11/25/2013 11:23PM

    It pays to clean! emoticon Hope you have a good week.

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KALISWALKER 11/25/2013 10:27PM

    LOL so we are both trying new recipes and unpacking treasures. Takes time and commitment to get it done.

Hope the blood work is good!

Have another good week.

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Moving Forward...

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Last week was very stressful. My son was told to go into the hospital and didn't. He got more blood work done again Friday. During the visit the Dr again advised him to go to the hospital if it came back bad. Today my son said the Dr said the blood work came back better. We don't know how true this is, but the Dr said he would call us if it was bad and we have not heard from him. My husband and I are going to get in touch with him tomorrow and find out "the plan". My husband and I thought my son would be in the hospital by now. I did see my son yesterday for breakfast at the waffle house (his new breakfast spot). I got oatmeal. He ate one poached egg, 1/4 of a piece of what toast, and 1/2 hashbrowns with tomatoes and jalapenos. He also met us and other friends out for dinner last night and ate a little more than 1/2 of his salmon and 1/2 his potatoes. Yes, everything is "half" with him, just like we are taught to do to lose weight. He told us that his co-workers gave him a get well card and $900. on friday! I am hoping that something clicked in his mind with that. He was very thankful for the money.

I didn't lose or gain any weight last week. I think that was good under the circumstances. My husband and I went out to eat dinner most of the week, between my husband's birthday and our son's dilemma. I did pack all my lunches for the week and somehow slept 9 - 10 hours every night except 1! And I stayed pretty close to my calorie limit.

One of the 5% challenges this week is portion control. Yesterday I did great at breakfast and lunch, dinner out didn't go so well. I ordered healthy but ate too much. I am glad we are planning on eating at home this week!! But, this challenge should help if we do go out. I don't want to let my team down!

One of my favorite bowls to use for portion control are from Crate and Barrel:



They hold exactly one cup and are microwavable. One of my favorite things to use them for are cooking egg whites (fill half way and microwave for 1 min, 20 secs) and you have the perfect size egg white (34 cals) for an english muffin! I also use them for soups and cottage cheese. They are so handy!

This weekend I went through my clothes. I had 4 pairs of running shoes in there! I ended up with two big bags for goodwill. My closet is all organized again!

All I have left for Fall cleaning is decorations I have stored in the basement. I am going to get rid of decorations I haven't used since I moved into our house 3 years ago.

Last night after we went out to dinner, we met up with a lot of neighbors for a bonfire. The weather was in the mid 40s and the night was beautiful. The Elk River glowed from the moon. It was a fabulous night to be out.



Today I "re-organized" my vision board. It had accumulated two years of running bibs, pictures, metals, etc. Seeing what I have accomplished re-affirms that I can do it! I organized the bibs by date (I always write the date and time ran on the back). My 1/2 marathon bibs are individually displayed with my pins. I forgot that I had earned to medals for 5ks! I looked at all my times and thought about the races I have run. I bought a special "Believe" rack for my half marathon medals at my last half marathon in October, so I finally hung it up! Everything is around my computer in my home office.



All I have left to do is get pictures developed from the Disney family 5k and my Delaware Marathon Relay team. I am going to display the pictures with the bibs and medals this week.

Thanks to all of you who have been praying for my son. I really believe in the power of prayer. You have been so nice and supportive and I really appreciate it!

I hope you have a fantastic week!


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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CKTALL 11/29/2013 3:12PM

    Tkmes may be stressful for yoj but you have been a motivation for me with all the racesdone

Awesome job

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_RAEVEN_ 11/21/2013 4:16PM

    I hope your son continues to eat and starts getting better and stronger.

Your wall of accomplishments is so emoticon Great job!!!

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SABLENESS 11/21/2013 12:55PM

    emoticon continuing prayers for you and your family. Keep taking care of yourself. emoticon

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LIZALOT 11/19/2013 1:01PM

    Sounds as if things could be looking up a bit for your son - let's hope so! And kudos to you for being so strong and seeming so calm (on the surface...) and for keeping in control and sleeping.

Sending courage and hugs

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IFDEEVARUNS2 11/18/2013 2:15PM

    I'm so glad the week ended well. Your corner looks inspiring. I wish I could motivate myself to declutter - again!

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KALISWALKER 11/18/2013 2:04PM

    I hope your son is doing better. I love your vision board. I was planning on doing one to have by my treadmill desk.

Have a great week!

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BOILHAM 11/18/2013 9:30AM

    Glad the Dr. hasn't felt the need to call you with unwelcome news, and that your son is eating, though small portions. I can't imagine the stress this puts you through. I pray for you and your family.

Your wall made me smile. It looks like mine and probably thousands of others who run. My daughter gave me a necktie rack to use for my ribbons, after my first rack filled up. I didn't like it so much, but I had to use it, right?

Take care.



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COFFEELS 11/17/2013 11:20PM

    You are doing really well staying positive during the difficult week you have had. emoticon

I really like those cups. That would make measuring so much easier. I will look into getting some. That is a beautiful picture you took the night of the bonfire.

That is a great vision board! I really need to set something like that up. It would be a great motivation.

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MWWENSIN 11/17/2013 8:27PM

    I love the believe medal hanger is that a shoe? Glad your weekend was better. Hoping everything goes better this week, I'll keep praying for you and your family.

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MBTEPP 11/17/2013 6:26PM

    RM, You are incredibly strong. You got past a critical point, and I hope your son is getting stronger. Keep that love a coming! Praying he will take the bait.

Love your vision board and believe rack. We should all have such a corner in our life! What a daily upper to admire your own accomplishments. Kudos to you, and all your races!

Peace!

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KAREN_NY 11/17/2013 6:13PM

    Love the vision corner, and love that you are sounding so well! Still praying for you and your family... thanks for sharing the update!
K:)

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KIWIANN 11/17/2013 5:30PM

    I think that you are doing remarkably well, and I am impressed by how positive you are able to be in the midst of your difficulties! Attitude makes a big difference in life! emoticon
I have some of the 8 oz size ziploc storage containers that I find handy for portion control - especially for pre-plannning and packing leftovers!
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Back From My Son's House...

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

My husband and I went down to my 25 year old son's house to persuade him to go to the hospital. He has full blown anorexia, and, according to the family doctor, can have a heart attack or renal failure any time (according to his latest blood work). My son wants to wait until friday to take another blood test. He said that if it comes back bad, he will go to the hospital and then into treatment. As nice as that sounds, he may not make it until Friday, and, the results won't come back until Saturday. Also, he won't stay at our house until then. I went over the fact that no one will be there to help him if he has a stroke, etc. He thinks he is fine because he has no chest pain, etc. even though last weekend he couldn't urinate - he blamed it on too much salt intake!

This has got to be the most insane disease I have ever seen! And, the law isn't helpful either. We can get the police to take him to the hospital but they can't hold him more than 30 hours! The Doctor can't get him held more than 30 hours in a psych ward.

So after an hour and a half of sitting on his family room, trying to pursuade him to go to the hospital or even our house we left. We did talk to our therapist before and after the visit. We are going to tell my son to put in writing what he will do Friday and Saturday when the bloodwork comes back bad. We are going to tell him to add that he will do whatever the Dr says to do.

My son said he will text me a lot throughout the next three days and go to dinner with me tomorrow night.

This whole thing is still unbelievable to me ten whole months later.
What a nightmare!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHERYLP461 11/22/2013 10:08PM

    What a painful time for you. I am hoping he will choose to do what is necessary to get back to health. I will keep you and your family are in my thoughts
Sheryl

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SUNSHINE20113 11/15/2013 3:28AM

    Sorry he didn't want to go to the hospital then and there, and hoping that he sticks to his word today and tomorrow. Still praying.

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COFFEELS 11/15/2013 12:55AM

    Praying for your family. emoticon

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_RAEVEN_ 11/14/2013 10:28AM

    emoticon emoticon I hope your son gets the help he needs.

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MBTEPP 11/13/2013 10:53PM

    I know you have to do everything in your power to save your son. It is heartbreaking to know he has the power to overrule you, as an adult he can do this. You must protect yourself too. My heart aches for you, mother to mother. I too envisioned the worst with my son, and hoped for the best. My heart breaks for your son, who has lost reality.

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KRISZTA11 11/13/2013 5:44PM

    I'm so sorry he is in such a bad state again, and you and your husband suffer again. I wish him insight and healing, and I wish you power and wisdom to get through this.
I imagine it must be maddening to see this damage to his poor body, all because of a disease of the mind.
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KIWIANN 11/13/2013 3:05PM

    emoticon

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SPARKLED146 11/13/2013 1:13PM

    emoticon Keeping you in thought and prayer.

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CYCLINGSANDY 11/13/2013 1:02PM

    What a mess! I cannot imagine your fears and concerns for your son. I am praying God will give you wisdom and a peace to deal with this and to open his eyes. emoticon

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MWWENSIN 11/13/2013 11:39AM

    One other suggestion is having him carry one of those devices which alerts a service around his neck I've seen adds for that on tv

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MWWENSIN 11/13/2013 11:27AM

    The only thing I can think of is ask him to draft a will in case he doesn't make it to Friday. Sounds like you've tried everything else. I'll be praying for you.

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MBTEPP 11/13/2013 11:06AM

    I am praying that the healing begins right now. Feel the warmth. Cherish every moment you have with your son. When children want to have control, parents feel so helpless. I went through he** with my son, and feared he was endangering his life and ours. It is really scary.

Please take care of yourself right now. You need strength and good health.

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STEPBYSTEP1955 11/13/2013 10:08AM

    Sorry for what you are going through. My continued prayers and thoughts are with you and your family.

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SPAMUNDY 11/13/2013 10:03AM

    Praying for your son and also you and your husband. emoticon

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BOILHAM 11/13/2013 9:18AM

    So sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you.
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IFDEEVARUNS2 11/13/2013 8:41AM

    emoticon emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 11/13/2013 8:36AM

    What a nightmare for all concerned. emoticon

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STRIVER57 11/13/2013 8:26AM

    hugs & white light. emoticon

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MLH148 11/13/2013 8:25AM

    It is a crazy disease. One friend of mine has a daughter who was diagnosed in her teens and still struggles in her mid 20s; another has a son who is 14. It sounds as though you have a plan which is great. Good luck -- and try to know it's not YOU and sometimes things are out of your control no matter how much you do the "right" thing.
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WATCHMEGO! 11/13/2013 5:56AM

    emoticon

Praying for you all.

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LIZALOT 11/13/2013 1:26AM

    sending lots of white light from here.

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 11/12/2013 11:26PM

    emoticon

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SHARON10002 11/12/2013 11:07PM

    All I know as I read your words here is that as a mother I would be beside myself with worry and fear. Asking God to give you the strength and love you need. . .

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STRIVERONE 11/12/2013 10:05PM

    I haven't commented on any of your entries concerning your son because I don't feel like I can make a useful contribution, but I do feel badly that he, you husband, and you are going through this. Does he genuinely believe that he does not have a problem, or does he acknowledge the problem, but is just incapable of addressing it?

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LYNNIERN 11/12/2013 9:59PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon to all of you!

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NEWKATHYNOW 11/12/2013 9:45PM

    I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. It is such a horrible thing to have to deal with, so relentless. You are in my prayers as always. I will be thinking of you all. Please let us know how he is doing.

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5BADDOGS 11/12/2013 9:25PM

    I am so sorry for what you are going thru. I have only very limited experience with anorexia personally.... My mother in law is a "recovered" anorexic, which is curious way to refer to herself since her eating habits are still pretty abnormal - only now they are on the more eccentric, and less on the dangerous, side of abnormal.

She is such a control freak, and has said that was how she was able to exert control - over herself and over everyone who cared about her. It made her the focus of everyone's attention and concern.

What she won't admit is that she now manages to do that same thing with other behaviors that are less life threatening - such as setting a sleep/rise schedule that is completely incongruent with the rest of the people living in her time zone, and consequently eating meals at very rigid times that adhere to that schedule, but not to conventional mealtimes.

Anorexia does seem to be a very complicated thing... My prayers are with you and your son.



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FRENCHTOSD 11/12/2013 9:16PM

    I'm so sorry to read this Deanna. I will keep you all in my prayers.

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DEB62BIE62 11/12/2013 8:59PM

    I'm so sorry for you and your family. This disease from what I understand is not good at all. I hope that he takes your advice and goes to the hospital, but it is probably going to take a lot of therapy and counseling. God bless you as you deal with all of this. emoticon

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Prayers Needed...

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

My anorexic son's blood test came back bad. He doesn't know I know. He told me its ok. The Doctor told him he is on the verge of a heart attack. My husband and I are headed down to his house now to make him go.

Please say a prayer...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CKTALL 11/29/2013 3:06PM

    Prayers for sure

Wishing all turns out well

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BABAJEAN 11/21/2013 12:19PM

    your son and your family are now placed on my prayer board - Lifting you up - positive thoughts and blessings to all !

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SUNSHINE20113 11/15/2013 3:25AM

    Oh no. Will keep you and your family in my prayers.

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VGNRNR3 11/15/2013 2:42AM

    emoticon

in my thoughts, wishing you best of luck

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5BADDOGS 11/13/2013 11:56PM

    I am praying for you both too.

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KAYWEB555 11/13/2013 9:29PM

    prayers being lifted for your son & family !

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CYCLINGSANDY 11/13/2013 1:03PM

    Praying continually for this situation.

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FREES1 11/13/2013 10:06AM

    may you and your husband find the right words, the right way or the right source to help and guide him.. and may your son listen to your advice and find a way out of his personal hell... emoticon

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SHARON10002 11/12/2013 11:01PM

    I'll ask God to heal your son, and will keep you and your family in my prayers. I'm praying for your strength, too.

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_RAEVEN_ 11/12/2013 7:46PM

    emoticon I'll be sending you and your family healing thoughts and positive energies.

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GRACEOMALLEY 11/12/2013 7:35PM

    I wish you and your family healing and love and success at handling the demons, and of curse, I send prayers.

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ROXYZMOM 11/12/2013 6:32PM

    Got in the house after a bit of yelling and now we sit!

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ONEKIDSMOM 11/12/2013 6:30PM

    Prayers on the way, for sure! emoticon

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MJEFFERSON23 11/12/2013 6:08PM

  I pray that your son is receptive, and that you have positive influence. I pray that he is completely healed. emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 11/12/2013 5:38PM

    Good thing you found out. Hope it's not too late to do something about it.

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DSQUARE22 11/12/2013 5:34PM

    Hoping the best for you and your family.

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KIWIANN 11/12/2013 5:20PM

    Praying for your son, and for you! emoticon

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 11/12/2013 5:16PM

    I'm so, so very sorry to hear this!
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MAGGIENCALI 11/12/2013 5:08PM

    emoticon

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BERTAS_JOURNEY 11/12/2013 5:03PM

    Thoughts, hugs and prayers coming your way.

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SPEEDY143 11/12/2013 4:57PM

    On my knees emoticon

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PIGGYWAY 11/12/2013 4:56PM

  I will be praying for you and your son I am a mom I no what you are going through

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BLUENOSE63 11/12/2013 4:54PM

  I will keep your family in my prayers.+

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