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One Week Until The Philly Rock-N-Roll Half Marathon..

Sunday, September 08, 2013

I have hung in there with my training. I hit 10.5 miles last week. My left knee is bothering me somewhat so I am putting bio freeze on it nightly. I think the shot I got is wearing off, but I will be okay for the race.

I am running with two teachers. This is one of the teacher's first half marathons. I am really excited for her. She told me I inspired her to run. That makes me feel good.

We are going to have fun with this one. There is a rock band every mile and it is a flat race. My younger son is going with me the day before. We are going to stay at a hotel right by the starting line. I dont want to deal with race day traffic in Philly. (there is an Eagles game and Phillies game the same day as the race!) We are going to hit the expo and he wants to go to Fogo de Chao. He is a weight lifter and practices jujitsu so he loves steak and lots of food.
There is a rock concert after the HM so we all should enjoy the weekend.

While we are in Philly, my husband and other son will be in Baltimore for the Ravens game - so we will all be busy!

Tomorrow I am going to run 7 miles, then 3-4 the rest of the week. I have been walking a lot more too now that the weather is cooler for the Bostons.
I am more mindful about what I am eating and tracking my food again.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SABLENESS 9/16/2013 10:39PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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OPTIMIST1948 9/16/2013 8:07PM

    It sounds to me like balance is re-entering your life. Well done and lood guck on the HM

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OVERWORKEDJANET 9/10/2013 9:17PM

    Where is the starting line?


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KAREN_NY 9/10/2013 3:54PM

    Good luck girl, and have FUN!!!! I've already said a million times that I wish I could go this year too, but I'll be there in spirit. What a great running party it'll be!!!

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Comment edited on: 9/10/2013 3:54:24 PM

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INFLATED 9/9/2013 5:18PM

    Philadelphia is about 3 hours from here. I am glad that you will be doing this run. It sounds like you will have a good time all day long. Think about those shoes with wings, lol!

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IFDEEVARUNS2 9/9/2013 10:25AM

    Good luck! This really sounds like a fun trip. I love Fogo de Chao, but I would save it for after-race.

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KIMPY225 9/9/2013 9:24AM

    Best of luck at the half marathon! I am not too close from Philly! I am definitely not ready to run as far as you do though!

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MARGARITTM 9/9/2013 9:10AM

    Have fun with this - you have trained well! This is just the icing..... hope the cooler temps stay with you.

Can't wait to read about it!

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EDENZMOM 9/9/2013 7:59AM

    oh Im so happy for you!
you sound so focused and so determined. I'm so happy that you have a goal and you're going to meet it soon and accomplish.
I'll be rooting for you!!

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 9/8/2013 11:28PM

    Have a great race!

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MAGGIENCALI 9/8/2013 11:04PM

    That sounds like so much fun! Good luck emoticon

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BAREFOOTGRL 9/8/2013 9:54PM

    Good luck. It sounds like this will be a fun trip.

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TIMOTHYNOHE 9/8/2013 9:54PM

    Last year, the Ravens were in Philly the day we ran the RnR. It was pretty cool to be representing for Baltimore in "enemy" territory.

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No Matter How You Feel, Get Up, Dress Up, Show Up, and NEVER Give Up...

Saturday, August 17, 2013

Sorry I haven't blogged in a while.

I needed time to focus more on myself. My 24 year old son's obsessive compulsive disorder took over my life and my husband's life through his anorexia. He can be very manipulative -- who wants to see their child not eat when they are severely malnourished?

Through a lot of thought and focus and anger I realized this and decided:

1. It isn't fair to me and my family
2. It is feeding my son's OCD even more

So, I am working on getting myself back. Yes, it is still sad and he is still very ill, but dwelling on it isn't helping me at all. I am sure I will occasionally mention him, but I cannot focus on it 24/7 so don't be surprised if I don't bring him up all the time. I do appreciate your continued prayers for him :)

So... what have I been up to you ask?

A couple months ago I signed up for the Philadelphia Rock-N-Roll Half Marathon. It is being held September 15. I figured it would get me motivated to start running again. For a while there, I thought I was going to drop out. I hadn't run in 9 whole weeks!

Well, I started back running last week. I am running at a slower pace to get my muscles and lungs back to a good flow (and not burn out!) I am up to 5 miles. I plan to run 3 - 4 miles on my short run days. I will run a 6 mile run the early part of next week and 7 miles next weekend. I should be at 10 in a couple weeks. I will run 10 a couple times before the race and should be set.
It won't be my fastest but the fact that I am doing this and will complete it with so much going on will make it such a fantastic personal victory for me.



When I started back to running a couple weeks ago my mind was so cloudy with all the negativity of my son's illness. I was feeling very sorry for myself and thought about it the whole time I ran. I wasn't really motivated to train but did it anyway. I just kept thinking "Just Keep Going". Today while I was running I realized I am not thinking about it the whole time I am out there anymore. I am paying more attention to my running music and thinking about other things I have to do or new ideas or the race that is coming up or races I have run. I realized the Philly race is almost one year to the date of my first 1/2 marathon. I am not in shape like I was last year - darn it! - but I am still going!
And...I will slowly get back there now that we are not eating out all the time.

We did get a new addition to our family this summer!
My son got a new dog, Maizey. She is a 1 1/2 year old Boston Terrier. Here she is with Roxy on the boat...



To add to our chaos, she now lives at our house, too, while he is "recovering" and staying at our house. Roxy is the boss, has lost all of her bottom front teeth proving it while fighting/playing with toys!

I hope you are having a fantastic weekend! Thanks for your continued support!






  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

INFLATED 9/4/2013 4:18AM

    Great title for a blog. Running used to help me when I was stressed. It is good for you to make time and take time for yourself. The saying about the oxygen mask holds true for life, we have to take care of ourselves before we can take care of others. Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. Even this commandment speaks of loving oneself. Do not let guilt set in.

Your son has to be accountable for himself, we cannot change anyone. We can change our attitude and I think this is going to be a good change for you. Running gives you time to think and to pray.

I had to have my teeth scaled with a water pick and the dental hygienist
asked me if I was okay. She said they would have had to numb her so she could endure it. The room had music from the 1960's playing, and I told her that I was thinking about dancing to the songs or what was going on in my life when certain songs were popular. Music can draw our thoughts away from that which is painful or it can do just the opposite, if it reminds us of a lost love.

I am cheering you on in the goals you have posted. I think working toward them will do you good.

Have you seen pictures of dogs with dentures, lol!



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LYNNIERN 8/25/2013 12:08PM

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CHICA_BORICUA 8/20/2013 7:51AM

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EDENZMOM 8/19/2013 10:02AM

    so happy to hear you blogging again!
you're a very strong woman, and I'm so happy that you're running again. I need to get my lungs back into running shape as well. I committed to my first real race in a few months, so I'm excited and motivated to get on that as well.
Looking forward to hearing more about your runs :)

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NEWKATHYNOW 8/18/2013 8:38PM

    Hey, girl! Good for you. Life has to have some sense of normalcy just to flow. Running, especially with music, should help in so many ways. Good luck with the half marathon. I'll be thinking about you that day. I'll be at a women's district meeting for our church women so I'll remember the day! emoticon

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REMEMBER2BME 8/18/2013 10:27AM

    I am just so very happy that you are placing focused on you. That is no doubt key. I am so impressed. Sounds like you have a plan and are sticking to it!!! GO girl!

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KRISZTA11 8/18/2013 5:07AM

    I believe moving yourself up on your priority list is the best thing you can do for yourself and for your son.

Enjoy your runs and good luck to your race!
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SWEDE_SU 8/18/2013 2:35AM

    sorry to hear you've been having a tough time of it - it certainly isn't an easy road to travel. glad you are getting back to your running, it is so good to have something to reach for. and i love the way the music takes me out of whatever is bothering me at the time. keep putting one foot in front of the other! emoticon

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IMREITE 8/18/2013 12:48AM

    it is great that you got back to running again. it is hard when there is emotional issues but the exercise will at lease help destress you.

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SMORECAMPING 8/17/2013 10:53PM

    I have experience with dealing with people with eating disorders...it is not easy. I will pray for your son and I am happy for you that you are finding your space again. I know its a day to day process. Prayers to your son for a progressive successful recovery.

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FRENCHTOSD 8/17/2013 10:49PM

    It's nice to read this, Deanna. I'm glad you are putting yourself first and I know how hard that is when your child is involved. Enjoy your runs. Sharon

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ONEKIDSMOM 8/17/2013 8:17PM

    Great insight... seems like you have turned a corner, recognizing that obsessing on your child's illness is not helping you... it also doesn't really help HIM take the responsibility for his own health that he needs. You're still on my prayer list... take good care of YOU, because that ol' oxygen mask has to be on YOUR face before you can help anyone else with theirs, right?

Not that you don't know all that on an intellectual level, but "tell it to the gut" is another story. Time for the mind to take charge, and sounds like it is doing just that!

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MSSHERRY10 8/17/2013 3:57PM

  Love the coffee note! Glad your taking time for yourself. I find running is a good time to clear your head. I wish you well on your training. emoticon

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KAREN_NY 8/17/2013 3:50PM

    Love this -- the coffee stop photo, the fact that you're running and shifting gears, and the support that this gives me for trying another HM this fall even though I'm not back where I wanted to be yet either.

Philly is going to be a great celebration of your personal victory!!! My hip won't tolerate the drive AND all the running, or I'd be there with you! I'll have to keep it local for now, and just work on getting a little stronger and a little stronger...

Sorry to hear about Roxy's teeth - omg! But I hope the two puppers have worked it out.

Cheers!
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MJREIMERS 8/17/2013 3:10PM

    It's not easy having a child with an eating disorder. It's been a year this month that we found out my oldest was suffering with one for four years. She is the one playing soccer in college this year! She also has a lot of anxiety in general so I'm sure it goes along with the ED.

She is now recovering, long story, and is doing well. She is very honest with me and will let me know how she's feeling so we can talk before she has a relapse. So here are some big emoticon from one that understands!

I also understand the need to concentrate on us! To be the best we can be and to focus on ourselves. Our children are adults, technically emoticon , and we can't make them do anything at this point. We can love them and support them, but we do need to take care of ourselves.

So you JUST DO IT! Go for that 1/2! I'm trying to get the guts up to commit to one...and to find the money. (We are just trying to be very frugal and get some things paid off. The oldest is responsible for paying for her college, but we want to help where/when we can.)

Hang in there and keep at it. I can't wait to hear about the 1/2!!!

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 8/17/2013 12:24PM

    emoticon emoticon

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FITFOODIE806 8/17/2013 11:22AM

    You are such an inspiration! I hope the training miles are going good for you. Happy running!!!

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A Hard Blog To Write...

Monday, July 01, 2013

Well, I am an optimist, and I hate to write anything less than that on this site. I always look at the bright side but 2013 is really testing me. My oldest son
- age 24 - has anorexia. I am still in such disbelief everytime I think about it. Anyway, he is back at his own house. He bought a dog, a Boston terrier. They are the best breed ever - look at Roxy - so, I have no problem wth that. My son's therapist in California kept suggestioning it so I guess my son decided to try. My son and his dog stay at my house a lot. Roxy is the boss and the puppy is sweet and house trained so it works out ok.

My son is still very thin. Not sure how much he weighs, but I would guess -110. He cuts his food up really small. He did start to add carbs this week (half of a potato). It is strange to watch him eat. He makes all of his food so small. I did figure out if I stay at the table a long time he eats whole serving, but it is an extra half hour. I will sit there for as long as it takes!

How am I? Not good if I went to the doctor. I have gained 10+ lbs, my blood pressure is up and I haven't run in 2 weeks. I have no motivation and quite frankly, just trying to breath. I hope none of you ever have to go through this in your lifetime. Actually, one of my close Sparkfriends has - and maintained their sense if humor - God, I hope I will and hope my son survives the way her daughter did. Anyway, I live day by day, minute by minute. I am now living at home. It is do hard working snd taking care of him, but I am doing it. I literally have no drive to run or even walk.

I am a mess! I have thought about ways to end my life to get out of the pain I have in my heart, but then I think of my family and try again to
make it all better.

I love reading how you are doing! I read all of your blogs and status updates. I look forward to the day when I can do that again!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REMEMBER2BME 8/18/2013 10:16AM

    I am so sorry I have not kept up. I hope you are doing better. I can't imagine the weight on your shoulders. HUGS

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NEWKATHYNOW 7/5/2013 10:25PM

    It sounds like it might be time for you to talk to someone. You're under an incredible amount of stress and have been for months now. The thought of you doing any harm to yourself is unbearable to anyone who even knows you at all, but would crush your family. You are a very strong person but every one needs help at some point in their life. I went for counseling when my husband died suddenly. It didn't change anything but it sure changed the way I coped with it all. I've had you in my prayers since this all started but I'm adding you to our church's prayer list as well. emoticon

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INFLATED 7/5/2013 8:52PM

    Hey, do you want to come for a visit? You are handling it, though it doesn't seem like it to you. Just get the thought of suicide out of your mind.

My husband and I would welcome you here. You would have to leave Roxy because my rottweiler might tangle with her.

I met my son's girlfriend for the first time this summer. I met her Dad when he and her brother came over to eat with us. This was the first time we did anything "all" together. My son said he wants to move back home in August. Not knowing where I am at in my life, this is good. He is wants to save for a townhouse.

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HLTHYLIVN_BAM 7/3/2013 11:14AM

    emoticon

You have always amazed me that you share your heartaches and your successes so openly here. It is great that you find support here because you give so much support at home. Hang in there and remember that your friends here support you!!

Comment edited on: 7/3/2013 11:15:57 AM

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KAREN_NY 7/2/2013 2:09PM

    (((hugs)))
Heartache is hell. No, really.
Thinking of you each day...


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MAMMER3 7/2/2013 9:48AM

    I wait and watch for you to write, it might be hard and it might be short but sometimes it helps to just get it out there is something therapeutic about writing your feelings and just whats happening. Just know we are here to listen. It might be small steps but hopefully in the right direction!! Good Luck and not trying to be selfish or mean but take time for yourself you might not feel like it but after the long dinner go for a short walk not even for weight just for your mind!!

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FITFOODIE806 7/2/2013 9:23AM

    I think about you everyday.
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CELIAMINER 7/2/2013 9:15AM

    No advice from me, as I haven't faced what you are saddled with. Just
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NELLJONES 7/2/2013 8:04AM

    There are support groups out there for families of anorexics. It IS a family illness. It's not like there is medication to "cure"it. Your role is more like that of Roxy, one of uncritical support and love. Sounds weird,but you'll need to cultivate the aspects of a dog.

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SWEETYOUNGTHING 7/2/2013 6:25AM

    You are in my prayers and thoughts - as others have suggested, please do seek counseling. Hopefully your son will be open to seeking help as well.

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OPTIMIST1948 7/2/2013 3:56AM

    Are you in your own therapy? It might be worth investigating. You might feel better if you had someone - some place to put all these feelings. Not that Spark isnt a great place to put feelings, but sometimes you need a little more. I'm glad Boy Child is home tho.

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IMREITE 7/2/2013 1:05AM

    we all have ups and downs and it is hard for us to sometimes help others if they are not willing to get help. at least your sun is surrounding himseld with support.

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BUCKEYEMOM8 7/1/2013 11:44PM

  As a mom, whose teenaged son experienced a debilitating bout of depression, I understand some of the feelings you are describing. I am praying for both you and your son and sending you positive thoughts. My son is much better now and we have come a long way out of the darkness. Take care of yourself. Your son needs a strong and healthy mom! emoticon

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ANDYLIN90 7/1/2013 11:38PM

    Believe me, I know how hard it is to confront the truth when you've gained back weight that you thought was gone forever. I'm now confronting that truth and starting to slowly get back on track.

I would really encourage you to see your doctor and talk about how you are feeling. You are obviously carrying a heavy load. I'm concerned you have actually thought about suicide. Even though your family seems to bring you some comfort, medication might help with your depressive thoughts.
emoticon
Linda

Comment edited on: 7/1/2013 11:39:10 PM

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LIVE2RUN4LIFE 7/1/2013 11:35PM

    emoticon emoticon

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GINA180847 7/1/2013 11:19PM

    It is just not right or kind to have this burden placed on you but what the heck! Who'd have thought having a child would result in this kind of pain.

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EDENZMOM 7/1/2013 11:18PM

    I'm so glad that you're back in your own home and not travelling anymore like we have been for the past few months. Maybe you are just getting used to being back home, and this hard new routine of work then caring for your son. it's demanding, but I'm sure that you will find a way to find your motivation again.
just try to remember how it feels when you run, look back at some of your previous posts.
You're an inspiration to many of us, and we are also looking forward to the day when you can put this all behind you.
Stay positive, and keep being the best mom he needs :)
xoxo

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SABLENESS 7/1/2013 11:07PM

    Hopefully the dog will be a healing presence for him. Hang on there, dear; you're doing the best you can. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Ugh! What happened to ez Fridays??

Friday, June 07, 2013

Ugh!! What a week!

My son started the week with a stomach bug so is back to 121 lbs! I saw an employee mishandle a child so had to at that point gladly fire her, report her to child abuse, tell and cry with the parent ( the child was not hurt or upset but it was still disturbing), meet with the police and continue to cry for the child at home!

I want to retire and move far away with my husband who I have hardly seen I. 3 whole months!

On the up side, I am back on track with food! I am on day two thanks to KarenNY! I am getting my self back on track even while I feel lIke I am an arcade game - I am the target and all sorts of ammunition are hitting me. I am literally feeling like "what is possibly next going to go wrong"?

On the flip side I thank God I found out about this emplayee. She started while I was in California. I was supposed to have a new washer and dryer delivered and the truck broke down. I got to work at 11. I saw the teacher mishandle the child at 11:30. - so glad I saw it!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SABLENESS 6/26/2013 10:39AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon Hope things have settled down a little by now.

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KAREN_NY 6/14/2013 2:44PM

    Hey darlin' -- I'm so sorry I didn't see your blog until today! I've been trying to check in, but the last week has been crazy (as we shared in the status feed). Keep taking care of you! :)

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HAKAPES 6/14/2013 3:50AM

    emoticon

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MAMMER3 6/11/2013 8:48PM

    Your an amazing person, love following your journey ups and downs. Just so you know no matter how hard you are making the right choices. Glad your back on track and feeling better. That woman should be punished and the kids are lucky you are behind them!!


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FUSIONFITNESS3 6/9/2013 2:07AM

    Thankful you dealt with the abusive employee in such a timely fashion. Not something we want to be involved in but sounds like you spared this child from what could have become a bad situation.

Sorry that you son is having another rough challenge.

I can well imagine you want to escape but glad that you are taking back some control by getting your eating under control. Hope you're still finding time for your runs again. Take care of yourself by making time for yourself to stay healthy.

Maria

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MJREIMERS 6/8/2013 8:39PM

    Rough day I'd say! However, you did the right thing for the child and parents. You are also doing the right thing for yourself in regards to your eating! Hang in there...it will get better!

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OWL_20 6/8/2013 6:25AM

    Glad you happened to be there, too! emoticon

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KRISZTA11 6/8/2013 6:06AM

    emoticon

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IMREITE 6/8/2013 1:33AM

    It is never fun dealing with unpleasant situations, but at least you were able to handle it before it got worse and someone got hurt.

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BEWELL48 6/7/2013 11:34PM

    Work is hard these days in almost all arenas! I am 'putting out fires all the time '. It is sooooo hard,! I am taking tomorrow off after working 11 days straight! My brain & body need a rest! Hope you can rest also!

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ROCKYCPA 6/7/2013 11:10PM

    Glad you caught the woman in action and took quick action.

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OPTIMIST1948 6/7/2013 9:23PM

    At least you did see and took quick action.

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Home, Roxy And Unsolicited Advice...

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Roxy and I took the red eye from San Diego to Philly last night/this morning. One of my managers went into the hospital with chest pain yesterday. She has heart issues - she is only 47!

Anyway, Roxy got tons of compliments at the airport. She is a very calm, well mannered dog. Several observers commented on her calmness. I told them she is exercised everyday. That is key. She is also well trained and knows I am the boss. I read Cesar Milan's book and watched his shows all the time when Roxy was young. I also went to one of his seminars. I implemented what I learned. Because of that, I enjoy taking her almost everywhere with me and am so proud of her.

So, it has been a very, very long day. I got a lot done at work and planned on spending the evening with my husband. That was foiled when the fire alarm went off at our business. So my husband is still there at 10 PM while whatever is broken gets fixed.

In the mean time, my mom called me to discuss their house hunting. My parents sold their house in Rehoboth a lot sooner than they thought they would and have no place up North to live. They stayed at my house last night with my husband. My dad proceeds to get on the phone and tell me he went through my pantry looking for coffee and inventoried the food in my pantry! He said 90% of the food is unhealthy and he would be fat of he lived here. Now, the ironic part is that he is VERY overweight! So, because of my 109 lb mom, his pantry is loaded with all fat free, etc stuff - but something is amiss if he is the heaviest by far out of all of us! Obviously, I didn't say that to him but it is true! He blamed my pantry on my son's bulemia and anorexia
and my son hasn't lived at home in 1 1/2 years! And I have been gone for 3 weeks and didn't even know what was in there!! I told him my husband can buy and eat what he wants in his own home. He said my husband will need to put a lock on his food if my son lives here! My dad doesn't understand that my son needs oil and regular foods - not fat free. Obviously, my husband is now furious and said my parents don't need to stay at our house. I am ticked too. We are both 50 years old - not 2!

Of course I went into the pantry to see what he is talking about. We have healthy cereals, oatmeals, protein powder, poptarts, teas, progressive soups, tons of tuns and salmon, fruit, nuts, pastas, beans, and dog food. 1 shelf has cake and brownie and baking stuff if I have company and one shelf has crackers, pretzels, chocolate covered pretzels, Doritos, popcorn and fig newtons. The nutritionist would be fine with my son eating the things in my pantry except the popcorn.

I am so annoyed right now I could scream!

Anyone else have a family member like that??

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KICKINGKILOS 6/2/2013 9:35AM

    Iam glad Roxy is huge hit :)
My dad has tooo been behaving awkwardly specially since the last couple of months. I feel worried and guilty--guilty as I have limited my talks with him. I miss the times I could talk to him easily!
I feel ya.

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KIMPY225 5/31/2013 3:57PM

    yay Philly - I live right by the city!

People always blame something or someone whenever they can - sorry about that!

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INFLATED 5/31/2013 2:38AM

    For me, it was my Mom and how I did my housekeeping. My sister is much better at keeping a clean house, but when Mom would come to visit, I would call my sister and tell her to get ready for a white glove inspection. Both of us would change the sheets on all of our beds, but when Mom arrived, she would pull the sheets off the beds and wash them and remake the beds.

I realized it was her and not me and let her work, lol.

Your Dad may be acting out because he has no control over the situation. When one of us got hurt, my Dad would just cuss and swear. He was angry because one of us was hurt and it was beyond his control. It scared me worse hearing him swear, than the actual injury did.

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KAREN_NY 5/30/2013 3:09PM

    I've watched my ex make observations to his grown daughters (my stepdaughters) about their pantries, homes, child-rearing habits, etc. Similar to the way his mother tried to do, I might add. I've decided that they do it as a way of inserting themselves into their lives, because they don't know how else to do it, especially when they don't see them often.
Their "contributions" get edgy because they are anxious about it in the first place. The irony is that it's all very alienating. When his mother died, the family gathered around to profess their love and mourning, but it was a love bourn out of duty, not affection. They all bonded over stories of what a pain she was. That's sad, because her former loving nature was lost to their memories. :(

Contrast this with my mom, who just likes to complain, and is more comfortable with others' failures than with their successes. sigh.

Bottom line - you know your pantry is fine, you know your son's (and dog's!) needs, and I hope you will find a way to let this be his problem, not yours.

How's that for more unsolicited advice? ;)

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CHERRY666 5/30/2013 12:05PM

    "He blamed my pantry on my son's bulemia and anorexia and my son hasn't lived at home in 1 1/2 years!"

That would make me SO angry! I can see why you feel like you could scream. He's sounds ignorant. (Why is it the people who are ignorant always seem to be the loudest and most insistent?) I agree with what another poster said about it sounding like he's grasping for straws -- looking for a simple answer to something he doesn't understand. Hopefully they find a new home soon!

*hug*

Edited to add: You know, my dad can be the same way (commenting on food like that), and funnily enough he's the heaviest out of all of us, too.


Comment edited on: 5/30/2013 12:06:30 PM

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IFDEEVARUNS2 5/30/2013 9:27AM

    I suspect most of us have a family member like that!
So glad you got compliments on Roxy - well earned, for sure.

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MAMMER3 5/30/2013 8:23AM

    I know how you feel, I am over 30 a married woman with 2 children and when I tell my mother I am going out with my friends she says and I quote. "Have fun dear just don't eat anything".

They will never change I realized its how you react to them and how you feel afterwards that you can control. Your pantry sounds amazing your son will thrive if he lives with you again and just let it roll off of you!!

Rock on!

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KRISZTA11 5/30/2013 8:01AM

    Oh dear, this is right what you didn't need to hear right now. I wish they would be more understanding and supportive!
emoticon
By the way, your pantry sounds just fine : )

My mom used to give similar "advice" when my daughter had eating problems ( I mean totally non-constructive, blame-placing and hurtful remarks that made no sense whatsoever + detailed inventory of how worried and stressed SHE was). Huh.
I was sorry to hurt her because she meant well, but I just couldn't take it, on top of the problems. So I told her that this is my daughter's problem in the first place (as an almost grown up herself) and my problem in the second place (as I'm living with her and facing the problem every day) and I don't want her "advice" and don't want to hear about her feelings. I kept saying this and finally the message went through.

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SCAREWALDORF 5/30/2013 4:34AM

    I think we all have family members like that. Your dad PROBABLY means well, but hasn't thought about the effect his words would have on you. I hope they find somewhere to live soon.



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IMREITE 5/30/2013 1:15AM

    my inlawas have allergies and digestive issues so i dont comment on food in their house. when we get ther i pack my own heallthy snacks. and i focus on eating slowly and enjoying what i eat instead of stressing about it.

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NEWKATHYNOW 5/29/2013 11:53PM

    Yep and I am certain they are allotted one per family! My late husband's daughter who is now in her early 30s is a wonderful, strong personality who is also very opinionated. As I told him once after a very disturbing conversation with her years ago on the phone - "I am the adult here and in charge of my own life." In her case she is a control freak.
Your Dad sounds like he's reaching for straws. He's looking for an easy answer to something that he apparently doesn't understand. For your sake I hope they find a house immediately! Real estate is definitely picking up in our area. One of my friends put their farm on the market and sold it the very next morning! I still can't believe that!
Hang in there and I'll keep you in my prayers! emoticon

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