ROXY722   14,597
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Beauty from ashes

Monday, September 23, 2013

Today I begin again. I did a diet recently where I had great success. It was crazy expensive, but I saw results. I lost 35lbs. I felt amazing - I was getting tons of compliments - my clothes were getting to big! I got off the diet - I started eating carbs again - I started eating whatever I wanted to be honest. No tracking - no checks and balances and now? Now my total loss is 15lbs. I feel defeated - a failure.

I thought this morning - what are you doing to change? The honest answer is nothing. I haven't started moving more, or eating less, or tracking my water, or tracking my calories. All the things I know I should do for success.
The excuses roll in - I have 3 children under 3 - The littles are often still waking up in the middle of the night for one reason or another - I work full time - We get home and then its dinner and bedtime - there's no time to workout unless I get up early...on and on it goes.

Then I thought why am I putting such a high value on that number on the scale? My worth doesn't come from a number - or the size of clothes I wear. I've been reading Made to Crave - it's helped me put things into perspective and so it is TODAY that I will yet again begin again. I WILL drink my water and TRACK my food. I will even beging to move more - little as it might be at first. :) But I have also decided that I will not allow my focus to become the number on the scale. Instead - my focus will be on Jesus. My value, my worth is found through HIM. And there is plenty in my life to be greatful and thankful for. Even the extra pounds I'm carrying around is a sign of that. That being said - it's time for me to honor Jesus - to lay it down and come to the foot of the cross. I can do all things through Chirist - and that includes losing this extra weight I'm carrying around. It's time to lighten the load.

A couple of my favorite quotes from Made to Crave:
“So, I'm not on a diet. I'm on a journey with Jesus to learn the fine art of self-discipline for the purpose of holiness.”

“I was made for more than being stuck in a vicious cycle of defeat. I am not made to be a victim of my poor choices. I was made to be a victorious child of God.”

“God can take what Satan meant for shame and use it for His glory. Just when we think we've messed up so badly that our lives are nothing but heaps of ashes, God pours His living water over us and mixes the ashes into clay. He then takes this clay and molds it into a vessel of beauty. After He fills us with His overflowing love, He can use us to pour His love into the hurting lives of others.”

¯ Lysa TerKeurst, Made to Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NELLIEC 9/23/2013 3:39PM

    Excellent! It is hard to pay attention to your own health when you are responsible for little children and a husband plus a job. Yet if you don't pay attention to your health, it will be harder to care for them in the long run.

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KNYAGENYA 9/23/2013 11:02AM

    You can do it... I have faith in you.

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The next 12 weeks

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

So we're half way through BLC 20 and it's time for an update! MOVE, LOSE, GAIN. Let's reflect emoticon

MOVE emoticon I haven't been moving as much as I'd like - as if I didn't know it already - life gets busy and there is always something. My "something" the past several weeks has been sick kiddos. emoticon I have been doing some extra moves over my lunch break at work - so I'm doing more than before - need to keep it up and add some more.

LOSE emoticon I was doing great - down 5 pounds (I think) but this past week was a doosie on the scale - so now my total lose is only 2 or 3 lbs. WILL get back on track. Am hopeful that this next week I will show a loss. I've begun to become more aware of the carbs I eat - tyring to choose higher protein items.

GAIN emoticon I haven't done as much strength training as I'd like. I'm going to purchase a kettle bell and hope this something new will encourage me to not only move more - but become stronger too.

The past 6 weeks I've taken baby steps - but baby steps moving forward! I was thinking today how when my daughter took her first steps we cheered and cheered for her - we were so proud! My 8 month old twins are beginning to become more mobile and with every milestone we cheer and get so excited! I am going to choose to cheer and be excited for the progress I've made the past 6 weeks - regardless how small the steps. Here's to the rest of BLC! emoticon

Blogging weekly - I need to remember to do this. I totally forgot that I wrote that down! emoticon

Last week I began BLC 20 - it was encouraged that we write what our goals were for the next 12 weeks. I really like this idea so that I can remind myself what I want to do here. MOVE, LOSE, and GAIN.

I want to move forward. I'm tired of treading in the same space. I need to do something different in order to see results. no chage = no reward

I want to lose weight. I want to be happy with how I look in family pictures during the holidays. I want to be in the pictures - not only taking them.

I want to gain muscle and confidence. I had it once - I want it again.

I'm going to blog at least once a week. This is my space where I can write how I'm feeling. I'm going to write weekly goals. I'm not going to quit.


One year on SP and counting!

Monday, June 08, 2009

A year ago I found Spark People. I had better hopes for where I'd be (regarding the scale) a year ago for today -- but the good news is:
1. I have made progress (even if it's small)
2. I'm still here and active on SP
3. I'm not going anywhere :)

13 lbs gone forever - not really an impressive number for being on here 1 year -- but @ least I feel that I am now the one "in control." For the past couple of years before I found SP I knew I was out of control - but wasn't sure why or what I was really doing wrong. I was working out (sporadically) and thought I was eating well too but wasn't getting any results.

Thanks to SP I'm now able to chart what I'm eating and see what's really going on. I love being able to track what I'm eating and see the calories that I'm consuming and what they're made up of. I am able to keep myself accountable by really knowing what's going in and not just having an idea. Thank you SP!

Good things/accomplishments for this year:

1. Did NOT gain! Eliminated 13 lbs
2. completed a half marathon
3. I'm drinking 64-96 oz of water most days
4. have been able to hold myself accountable with what I'm eating by tracking my food
5. have stopped the roller coaster -- I may be losing slow -- but the great thing is I'm maintaining in between.
6. I have gotten involved with SP. I'm a member of various groups and even a Co-Captain for one team.
7. I've made friends through SP and have been motivated by others on this site. Hopefully I've motivated other people too!

Things to improve/ Goals for the next year:

1. Continue to eliminate - goal = 30 lbs. by 2nd yr anniversary
2. Track Food during the weekend.
I'm losing ground over the weekend b/c I'm not tracking. My hard work isn't paying off b/c I'm taking off on the weekends. JUST DO IT! (and I bet I'll start seeing faster results)
3. Cardio. I was great w/ my training for the half -- but have slacked since then. Stop making excuses and start making time.
4. LIFT -- I know it's important to incorporate lifting and I feel better and stonger when I do it.
5. Reward myself -- this is a new concept for me - but I'm going to try it. A variety of things... maybe purchase a book or go to a class @ the gym (blocking out that time) getting a mani or pedi, etc...
6. Make working out a PRIORITY


Help - I'm Stuck!

Friday, October 31, 2008

I was doing so well -- I was working hard and watching the scale go DOWN! But now I'm STUCK.

I'm up & down between a 12-15 lb loss and can't seem to get past it. I NEED HELP!

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get my mojo back? I will admit the past couple weekends have been full of weddings and traveling -- so that could be part of it. I just really need some encouragement that the scale WILL move again! And of course - any tips would be appreciated!

My current program:
Calorie range - 1200-1550 and I am almost always in my range
Cardio 4-5 x's @ 30-40 min each week.
No strength training right now...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GLITTERGIRL69 11/2/2008 5:02PM

hi, how are you doing? I have a few suggestions that I think will really help you. The reason you are having trouble losing additional weight is because your body had been "conditioned' to burn the current amount of calories for the amount of food that you are eating. In order to lose the extra pounds that you want to lose you either have to eat less or exercise moe. I recommend that instead of exercising 4-5 times a week for 40 min., instead exercise an hour 4-5 times a week. It is just 10 min, longer but it will make a difference. However, you need to do more than just that if you don't want to cut additional calories each day. I suggest also adding something different to your exercise routine. Run or spend time on a stationary bike, or walk at lest 30 min. a few times a week. I strongly suggest add weights to your exercises. The more muscle mass you have the more calories you will burn while resting ( reading, watching TV, talking). Just as it took some time losing weight when you first started to exercise so will it take time to lose this additional weight. It usually takes 2-3 months to see noticeable results. The bottom line is , you need to do more of it more often. I believe that you can do it. You lost the other weight you wanted to girl, you're almost at the finish line , all you have to do is finish this race!! Be patient with yourself. YOU CAN DO THIS! YOU BECOME WHAT YOU BELIEVE!!!!! Shelly emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/31/2008 8:05PM

    You can also try getting moving a little at night just to keep your metabolism going.

You are doing great!

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SPARKYTHESEAL 10/31/2008 11:15AM

    Hey Roxy - turn around - your MOJO is right behind ya - tapping on your shoulder darlin'!! Put the scale in the back of the closet. Start taking your measurements instead. PAT yourself on the back for your consistency every day! I definitely recommend strength training too! I love my weight lifting class and it is the only thing that has really shown me an inch loss!
You ARE doing GREAT and should believe in yourself!!!
Happy Halloween GIRL!!

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We fall down...we get up

Monday, September 29, 2008

Here's something I found on-line and had to share. By Jimmy Patterson:

We fall down, we get up
Karen and I have talked a lot recently about stumbling. Not literally, of course, but the spiritual and emotional stumble. She feels bad when she feels the urge to not be quite so healthy on a particular day and so she'll trip and order some nice, juicy, gooey, cheesy enchiladas at a Mexican food restaurant and then she'll spend the rest of the night wondering if the stumble is long term or only a fleeting break in what has otherwise been a wonderful self-improvement journey for her. And I consider my own issues and how I try to battle them daily. They are there. And then they are not. And then they are there again. And I wonder what will it take to finally get over those issues? What will it take to have total self-control for the rest of life? To do good every day for ever?

But one day recently it finally dawned on me: that perpetual goodness that we all wish we could achieve may or may not ever happen. We confront our demons, our challenges, our issues, whatever, every single day. We crawl out of bed and put our game face on and we go out and show ourselves to the world and we have no idea what the day will bring and how we will respond and often all we can do is try our very best and hope for the best.

After this bombshell epiphany dropped on me (it took only 48 years, understand), I told Karen that we can't really see ourselves as failures. If we have that chimichanga and beer after 30 days of Weight Watchers dinners and bananas and walking two miles a day, it's not a failure. At least it doesn't seem like it should be considered a failure to me. Life to me seems like a series of days, weeks and months of doing good followed by, hopefully, shorter periods of falling down. We fall, we pick ourselves up again, brush off the dirt and the leaves and whatever else has caked on us and we keep on. And then we do well for a while again and we feel good again and then one day we wake up after a bad day at the office and we don't feel like doing so good so we fall again.

The cycle repeats itself ad infinitum for many of us. I doubt seriously that any of us set out to do good in life and accomplish that task for the remainder of their lives every single waking moment. But it's not for lack of trying.

The good and the not-so-good cycle applies regardless the aspect of your life you've decided you need improvement. It doesn't matter your vice or your bad habit, you try to do better and then one day you wake up feeling like today's not the best day for doing good and so you don't.

If you fall down frequently, don't despair. It is not the falling down that is our failure. It is only in the failure to get back up.

Posted at 01:21 PM in This Real Life of MIne | Permalink

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNSHINE4747 10/1/2008 7:57PM

    This is great- thanks for sharing!!! I wish I would have read this two months ago- why are we so hard on ourselves?

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RUNTRILAUGH 9/30/2008 2:28PM

    I should have read this BEFORE going to the bag of pretzels....

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LUCKYLESLIE 9/29/2008 11:36PM

    This is very "deep" and it can be applied to just about any addiction in life! Thank you so very much for sharing! God Bless You-Leslie

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NELLIEC 9/29/2008 10:27PM

    Yes, each day is a challenge.

It is similar to our sin nature. We all sin (except Jesus and He was tempted in all things just as we are), and we all need to have those moments of seeking forgiveness -- whether it is from God, ourselves, or others. We do well sometimes, and other times .....

May God bless you!!!

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