Wednesday, June 11, 2014
How interesting it is to be here, at 11 am on a Wednesday morning to be posting on Spark people. Normally I would be in the thick of a long, rough week at work right now.
Summer is usually such a busy time...with so much hustle and bustle on the job, weekend get togethers, people wanting to come over and visit and by the way, swim in my back yard. And of course they happen to bring a dish for an impromptu cookout.
But things are not happening that way.
Two weeks ago I was driving back from a field assignment at work, when suddenly my vehicle was hit head on by another car as it crossed the center line.
My right leg is pretty badly injured, but I am so lucky to be alive. Getting my head around that has been tough. I am lucky my injuries weren't worse. I have some sadness, because the other person who was in the car with me is fighting hard to be alive right now.
But I am happy for the great weekend I had before that, celebrating my dear husband's birthday and visiting my family in my hometown for a picnic. And for what I managed to get done around the house.
In the last few weeks I have had to make many adjustments. I was in the hospital for a few days after the accident. During my time there I was told that it would be several months before I will be able to put weight on my leg. I won't be driving for a long time, though it will be awhile before I care to.
I am coming to terms with all of the help that I will need. I am grieving for the lost opportunities playing outside my boys. I am doing everything I can for them though. Again, I am thankful that I did not have to leave them behind to grow up without a mother...let's just say my constant prayers for a long and healthy life with my family were answered that day.
Next week I will be going back to the hospital for surgery to repair my heel fracture. They are talking about pins...screws...what I call "hardware."
I am wondering whether I'll ever be able to run again. I don't like the prospect of this injury affecting me the rest of my life.
It is hard for me to depend on others right now to help me with basic things. I can't take a real shower. Don't know when I will again. I am using a walker to get from the couch to the bathroom. I am starting to do a few things beyond that...little glimmers of hope but I have to work hard to stay upbeat.
I am happy and thankful for the friends and family members who are coming around....though sometimes I just like to be alone.
I am not sure what the purpose is of this twist of fate, how my life may change because of this accident, or what it will be like when I return to work in several months. But I know I have been dealt something. There are some positive things that came from this, but it is a battle waking up every day to again adjust to this situation and wonder how the day will go.
I am thankful to have the Spark community to help me stay as healthy as possible during this recovery, and if you pray, please say some for me next Wednesday.
Thank you for reading.
Saturday, May 03, 2014
"DAILY REMINDER : Be confident. Be powerful. Be beautiful INSIDE & OUT. Don't focus on what other people are doing. Focus on your finances, your relationship, your spirituality and your happiness. Be HAPPY with loving your life, having something to say, having something to give, giving to others, pursuing your dreams, knowing your worth, knowing God, and spreading positive energy. Today is the day to enjoy your blessings, expect new miracles and be better than yesterday. You deserve to be happy & celebrate your womanhood today."
-Shanel Cooper Sykes, Author
This sums up my thoughts exactly!
I woke up on my 32nd birthday weighing 166.4 lbs again. Slightly up from the progress I had been making.
I have 40 lbs to lose to get to a "healthy" weight for my height, I have babies and my love to take care of, a house to keep, church, friends, tons of family....and a job to do. The happier I am now, the happier I will be later, when I am older.
I deal with some difficult people sometimes, and there are many people in my family who need as much help, or as much of my time, as I can give them. But sometimes I have to tune them out. And some are hard to tune out.
But I have a new trick...
When I work hard to make a healthy choice (and sometimes I get tired so it's hard to do that), I do this thing now where I play the sound of APPLAUSE in my head
Friday, April 11, 2014
Having gained some weight in the past two years, I have been thinking about how much of this was caused by sources of stress I encounter on a daily basis!!! Seems that stress and procrastination leads to more stress and procrastination, all feeding on itself and causing your body to go into panic mode. So much on one's plate and and still they can be hungry for food they do not need.
I have learned some great ways to handle stress...but sometimes I become very frustrated when I feel I have tried everything I know and learned to do, and still find myself feeling low. So I am going to take a minute to write down a few positive thoughts, to keep me
1) There are some sources of stress that are just not going to go away.
The DAYS HAPPEN and you have to give your best, and find a way to be comfortable and confident with that even though you may not be completely satisfied. Even with the difficulties I face each week at work, I still love the job when all is said and done. And even though I always want to try my hardest to do better, I have adapted very well to the challenges that have come with motherhood and home life.
2) Relaxation takes some work sometimes, but it is also necessary.
One night this week I made a point to find something to do after the kids were asleep, instead of just getting ready for bed myself...or snacking and thinking. I did a little de-cluttering, folded some laundry and talked to my husband for a bit...just about pleasant things and not anything related to the daily grind. Funny how folding laundry could lead to such an "AH" feeling...but it did! Then again, there was also time when I had to tell myself it was OK to relax on the couch.
3) Choosing happiness more often.
This week I tried some "in the moment" techniques when I could feel the stress attacking my body. Sometimes you have to tell your mind..."you do not need to try to process this right now."
4) Seek and graciously receive some help.
I don't think there are many situations where people are able or willing to help me, but I found one when I was scrambling to put some music together at church.
Could I find some more ways to not only seek and receive help, but also give help...without worry of how it will contribute to more overcommittment? I'll have to think on that one.
Friday, March 21, 2014
This is a blog for a Spark team challenge...but I haven't posted for a long time so this is probably going to seem more like thoughts out loud. Out of practice having much of a Spark audience so bear with me!
There are Just a few things I want to remember in the midst of some hard work I have been doing....at work, home, church, and lots of other obligations...
Really it's simple to say:
It will get finished, I will find time, the weight will come off.
In the mean time though, there are lots of things coming up this spring.
Something I have been looking forward to doing for about two years now is to take a week off work, not to go anywhere...just to stay home and be with my sons. My opprotunity to do this is becoming limited as my older son will be in school this year, so I am thrilled it has worked out!!
There is a lot I want to accomplish between now and then, so that there won't be much of anything lingering to "let go" of and enjoy ten....that's right TEN days off!
Wednesday, January 01, 2014
If there is one big lesson I learned on Spark in 2013...it was from a post I read with a message that said "Love your body and the weight will take care of itself."
This being my chosen focus for 2014, I have decided to write it an open letter. Perhaps it's a cheesy idea, but a year from now I want to read this letter from a perspective of how far I have come from where I am today.
This year we will become a little older, but let's make sure we stay as youthful as possible. We have been through many up and down times together...as I remember all these seasons I thank you for the things you have done to heal when I was hurt or injured, overcome what viruses or illnessness came your way, and tried to help me realize I was under a lot of stress and I needed to try another way to cope besides becoming angry. Thank you for being a home to both my babies before they were born. I don't know body what the future holds with that, but let's prepare for it in case we do come to a time where that will happen again.
This year, I just want you to know how much YOU matter. I am sorry for the times that I was angry with you, and sometimes did not treat you with the respect that you deserve. I love the exercise we get to do together. I love the way you help my mind relax. I love the place that you are as a home to my soul.
I promise to fill you with more good things that are healthy for you and all of your parts and systems, and less of the things that are basically garbage as far as you are concerned. We are going to do a few things on the Spark login in page every single day this year to help with that.
Let's learn more about yoga and Pilates. And juicing so you get more of what you need to stay healthy. Will you help me take care of the things the doctor says we need to work on? If I can fit in more time for running, will you help me stick with it again?
I think we should also continue to do our best to stay away from stress. Some is unavoidable, but let's make sure we let our mind work to be at rest when that happens.
Let's try. Let's do our best. And let's see what wonderful things we can accomplish in the year ahead. I love you and I promise to take great care of you, forever.
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