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Spring Is Here; Time for my re-birth

Thursday, April 23, 2009

My birthday is in the spring and the Bahai New Year starts in March. The Spring months are my energy months. I have a need to correct all the bad things that I "let go" or was too depressed to do in the last three months. And it is sad because my husband is still in that "funk" and there is nothing I can say to make any difference. I'm better off not saying nothing. It seems to have become "mine" and "yours" more than "ours"...I'm not quite sure how to change that part of my life.

But I can change MY LIFE and my way of thinking. He says we don't communicate, I tend to agree. In fact, I agree with a lot of things I don't, just to make him happy.

I'm having a hard time with the way the roles have reversed in my life. He is the one that stays home and takes care of everything (more or less) but when I try to help and clean up and put things away...I get told to leave things alone. I'm left going to my work and paying the bills.

Been reading a lot of books about menopause/the second half of life...I wish that I had a household stressfree. Never...I can't see it happening. I've got to figure out a way to make my own peace with the way my life has turned out.

So I am working on my re-birth. Thanks for letting me vent. There will be more blogs in the future.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 4/23/2009 10:15PM

    My Scorpio husband has always had to run everything about the house, so I just don't argue. What ever I'd do, he'd criticize.
I'm glad you have a job and money to pay the bills. Do make a new start. Your birthday is the best day of the year to do that. This is TAURUS now, so it is a time to want to "dig in and nest" so know that. It is a time to have mother/daughter issues. It is a time to get money stable and pay bills.

Look within. There you will find as much light as anywhere you can look.

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Here I am again

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Here I am again....got called into working the 3-11 shift because the boss called in sick. So I am babysitting the front desk. It is soooo slow. I have 14 rooms and waiting for only 5 more reservations to show up. And 3 more working hours to go. At least I don't have to work the breakfast in the a.m. so I will still have one day off this week! But only 3 breakfasts instead of 4...that makes me happy!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 2/4/2009 2:02AM

    emoticon

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February's here!

Sunday, February 01, 2009

I am going to do better this month!

I am having to overcome a total day change....my old work schedule was 3-11 five days a week (sleeping in late) and 1 breakfast shift of 4 hours one day a week. NOW... 4 breakfast shifts and a 7-3 shift (having to get up at 6 am) and 1 desk shift on Monday that is 3-11.

I can't wait until my body gets used to this. Makes it even worse when I am having the worst night sweats imaginable!!! I feel so drained all the time. All I want to do is go home and take a nap....there goes almost my whole day already!

I can do it!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 2/2/2009 2:49AM

    Taking a nap is good. emoticon

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I'M STILL HERE

Sunday, January 25, 2009

LOOKS LIKE I WILL BE POSTING ON SUNDAY OR MONDAYS NOW. SO I HAVE TO WRITE DOWN EVERYTHING I DO OVER THE WEEK SO I CAN POST IT AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE I AM DOING SOMETHING!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 1/25/2009 9:41PM

    You are doing something. Being here is doing something. emoticon

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THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Actually, it is only Monday! My work week ends today and starts again on Thursday.

I've been doing horrible with my lifestyle changes. It's like I have to eat the goodies that the boss brings in...I can't get away from my chocolate addiction. I have to stay away from a lot of carbs but unfortunately, that is what food cost the least of nowadays.

I am lying to myself and to you all when I say that I am doing fine and I am not. I've gained back the 2 pounds that it took me 2 weeks to lose...

In exactly 6 weeks, I will be 50 and had the goal of being 110 pounds by then.

Tell me, what can I do to get myself moving out of bed in the am (when I am in soooo much pain)???

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 1/13/2009 1:05AM

    This is a battle and it sure isn't easy to win. emoticon

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