I scream You scream We all scream for crayons?

Friday, September 07, 2012

I have this really bad habit of not making my girls do their homework right after school. As a full time student myself by the time we all get home in the afternoon I've had it with learning. So I tend to let them go to the neighbors or have the entire neighborhood at my house until dinnertime and then sit down to homework time. Last night my 1st grader was the only one with homework so I decided we could do it this morning before school. She's really good about waking up and it wasn't a hard assignment so no big deal right? Well it wouldn't have been if this Mommy hadn't stayed up until after midnight playing on SparkPeople and Facebook and then slept through the alarm. So 20 minutes before the bus is due I'm shaking people awake and rushing around to get everyone ready. Now before the school year even started we went through the closet and I told each girl to pull out what the didn't like or no longer fit. Enter my pms-y 9 year old who almost has a meltdown bc she doesn't like the first pants I grabbed for her. Then pair 2 doesn't fit. Mommy is almost ready to have a meltdown by the time she gets out to the kitchen to help the 7 year old with homework. The sweet 7 year old who quietly got dressed, brushed her hair and teeth, and waited patiently for me to get done with her prima donna sister. I tell her to go get some crayons so we can complete her sheet and she asks me to do it. I snap. I snap hard.I scream at her to go get her crayons or while she's at school I'm gonna throw away every crayon in the house. And before Iknow it she's crying and then I'm crying. Bad mommy moment.
So we manage to get through the homework together and drive to school on time. As she gets out of the car I say I love you and she says I know. i say no I really really love you. She just rolls her eyes at me. Think maybe after school we'll go to the store for a treat. Maybe I'll buy her some new crayons :)

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANNIEGRL85 9/8/2012 12:23PM

Wow that sounds so much like me, and I only have 1. She is 6 and she is in first grade. Every morning its a fight to do everything. The good thing is that when I do my workout videos she is right there next me. She wants to do everything I am doing. It is so cute to watch a 6 yr old do yoga. Keep your head up and know there I am definitely just like you) Have a great and fun school year. Report Inappropriate Comment

MIAJOEB 9/8/2012 1:27AM

What a day.... enjoy them while you are able... My "children "are 40 and 43 but someday they will make you so proud because of all the time you took to take care of them today.... Report Inappropriate Comment

MOM5LILMONKEYS 9/7/2012 12:49PM

I can relate! My goal for this school year is to not yell before 8 am! We're trying to get on a schedule but it doesn't always work. I noticed you're in school for your nursing degree. Just got mine 3 years ago!! Hardest thing I ever did, but so worth it! Good luck! Report Inappropriate Comment

Soothing Sushi

Thursday, September 06, 2012

Up until about 6 months ago the thought of sushi made my stomach roll and the bile start rising in the back of my throat. Enter my high school friend JP. In an effort to see her and catch up one day I agreed to meet her at a sushi joint I knew served NORMAL food as well.
The thing about JP is she is VERY persuasive and so before I knew it I was guiding a piece of Cha Cha Lobster roll into my mouth. Hello food orgasm! It was divine. But not as divine as my friend or our lunches became.
What started as a desire to catch up has become a regular bi-weekly date. We talk about everything from kids and significant others to work, bills, politics, and all things in between. JP also suffers from depression. Sometimes we talk about that. Sometimes we wallow. Sometimes we celebrate triumphs over it. Sometimes we ban all depression talk. But no matter what we do or don't talk about, I always leave our lunches refreshed and rejuvenated. Ready to tackle the day and whatever life has planned.
Moral of the story: Never be afraid to try something new. For me it was sushi. For someone else it might be zumba, spinning, or the trapeze. You may find you don't like it or you may find its better than a trip to the day spa or therapist.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIAJOEB 9/6/2012 6:33PM

I looooove sushi. Used to get away to the shrimp roll... the one with the shrimp tail sticking out and the wonderful mayo sauce.... but too many calories.... but once in a while. Report Inappropriate Comment

For the love of good friends

Monday, August 20, 2012

Been very depressed lately but didn't realize it. I know that sounds odd but its true. I've been finding reasons to stay at mom and dad's overnight or practically throw myself at TR to spend the night there. I realized today that it was bc I didn't want to go home to my house. I'd let it get so disgusting that not only did I not want anyone else to see it, but I didn't want to look at it myself. I guess it started when our gas was shut off. And I've just let it get continually worse. Kinda came to a head today when my good friend Laura and her kids came by and I wouldn't let them in the door. As we sat on the porch talking I just got more irritated with myself. As soon as they left I set to work. Only took an hour for the girls and I to tidy up the living room, kitchen, and bathroom. The playroom and bedrooms will take a little longer but the wheels have been set in motion.
What does this have to do with weight loss? Well it is hard enough to focus on eating healthy and excercising when everything in life is perfect. But who's life is ever perfect? I have school, work, my kids, my depression, a mother with ms, and life to deal with on a daily basis before I even attempt to deal with my weight. So keeping as much as I have control over in order helps make life easier. One of my new goals is going to be 10 min/d just tidying up the house. Goes a long way towards making me happy with helps me be a better student/worker/mother/daughter/ and most of all ME.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIAJOEB 8/20/2012 1:03PM

With such a full plate of things you need to do, no wonder you are having trouble finding the time to do it all.. Have you asked for help and Ideas from the friends you are turning away at your door? Have you asked for Ideas from people here at spark? Your Ideas are good but some support would also be important. I belong to a fit and organize team. I know there are teams with people who are fighting depression. Maybe that will help. Getting ideas from others who understand and are going through the same problems. Report Inappropriate Comment

Did you take your meds today?

Monday, August 13, 2012

Last night the man I'm madly in love with took something I said wrong and asked if I'd taken my meds. I'm not ashamed that I have depression and am very open about my struggles, what works/what doesn't med/therapy/etc. But to have that thrown in my face hurt. But instead of letting it derail me I made an honest effort to make today count. I know my weight and depression are related and have high hopes that losing weight and feeling better about myself will allow me to better tackle my depression. So here's to small victories - not letting an ignorant comment get me down and not kicking my love's ass ;)

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRYS210 8/14/2012 2:36PM

You achieved a success with your choice and are well on your way towards your goal! Am very proud of your decision. Krys Report Inappropriate Comment

2BIGNBOUNTIFUL 8/13/2012 10:08PM

Way to go! Its hard to let it go, just don't let it build up. I wish you the best! Report Inappropriate Comment

GAELA-I-CAN 8/13/2012 9:59PM

Your wining the weight/depression battle. It's so tough. Congratulations. Report Inappropriate Comment

ENCRYPTEDTRUTHS 8/13/2012 9:58PM

Wonderful response. Its nice to see you channel your upset into something productive. So many times I have found myself in a similar argument/situation, I haven't always went to the positive place that you went with it. The world feels small sometimes and we lose ourselves in the negativity around us. It is great to see someone rise above it. Communication is key in all relationships, sometimes we forget how hurtful something so small can actually be to both mental and physical health. Stay strong and be proud of the person the person you are, as well as the person that you are becoming. Good luck! Report Inappropriate Comment

STUDLEEJOE 8/13/2012 9:51PM

great post. One step at a time, and don't let anyone steal your goals. Report Inappropriate Comment

My Spark is Fizzling

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Every few months or so I get super motivated to lose weight and be healthy. I spend hours filling a calendar with exactly how I'm going to work out everyday and what I'm going to eat right down to snacks. I browse online for new fitness sites. Everything is ready and as soon as the day to begin arrives...I'm no longer interested. So I slump through a few weeks and when I don't see results (bc I'm not trying) I give up and declare it a hopeless endeavor.
Well this time I vow to do things differently! I'm committed to losing this excess weight and feeling better about myself. More importantly I'm committed to getting healthier for my daughters so I can enjoy life with them.
1st change - Instead of pre-choosing each workout and/or meal I've filled out index cards with 7 days of workouts and meals. Each morning will be a surprise as I choose a card from each catagory. This way I won't psych myself out bc I've had all week to be nervous about that new workout or meal. Starting tomorrow I'm on the track to whole new me :)

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEFIT013 8/11/2012 11:06PM

Sounds like a really cool plan--i like the 'each morning will be a surprise'. Don't over-think it, tho. Just go with the flow! Good luck to you! Report Inappropriate Comment

STUDLEEJOE 8/11/2012 8:35PM

Sounds like a plan. Report Inappropriate Comment

DIET_FRIEND 8/11/2012 7:19PM

I think you might try not putting too much thought into it up front. Shop for some foods you can eat and keep it simple at first. With exercise, think of something you enjoy and do it, even if it's only 10 minutes of vacuuming the house--that will surely raise a sweat! What works best for me is carefully tracking all that I eat and weighing every day. Little by little, my weight is coming off. Good luck with your card system and keep on sparking! Report Inappropriate Comment

DIET_FRIEND 8/11/2012 7:19PM

I think you might try not putting too much thought into it up front. Shop for some foods you can eat and keep it simple at first. With exercise, think of something you enjoy and do it, even if it's only 10 minutes of vacuuming the house--that will surely raise a sweat! What works best for me is carefully tracking all that I eat and weighing every day. Little by little, my weight is coming off. Good luck with your card system and keep on sparking! Report Inappropriate Comment

WYLDNFREE1 8/11/2012 7:15PM

That is a really good idea... Stay strong believe me I know it's hard and easier said then done Report Inappropriate Comment