Sunday, December 15, 2013
Thought I was off from work today. I was poking around when my daughter said: "You'd better get going. You're going to be late for work." After insisting I was not working tonight, she said: "Go check the calendar. I'm sure you're supposed to work tonight." I did, and to my shock and horror, she was right. It was 3:55pm. I was still in my night clothes and my drive to work is nearly an hour, in good weather and traffic. The weather has not been good this weekend and there's an NFL game in the city tonight. I thought I would be stuck ordering out for dinner (probably pizza or something equally as high in calories, as choices are limited at night) or buying something in the puck-a-teria [cafeteria], which is, also, high in calories and low in nutrition. But, my daughter got my lunch together, while I threw on my uniform and, lo and behold, through the grace of God, I got to work and punched in at 5:22pm (my shift starts at 5:30).
Sometimes, the people around us, can be a hugh help in keeping us on the right path.
Now, just to give you a little more understanding of why this is important to me. I have often accused my daughter of being a saboteur to my efforts. She makes delicious foods and treats that are high in calories and, of course, insists on me having some. I guess it's important for her to know I think her efforts are paying off. Having realized this, and knowing she is trying to help, I've had an "AH-HA" moment. I don't need to eat a full portion when she's made something I really don't want. Just a taste, and an affirmation for her, will suffice.
I guess we seek our parent's approval no matter how old we are, and that's really all she wants.
To make this revelation even more timely. When I went to my Spark Coach plan for today, it was about surrounding myself with positive people to aid me in my journey. Talk about a message meant for me...... WOW!
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
It's been a long time since I've been on SP, and even longer, since I really tried to stick to a healthy way of eating. Forget exercising. I can't remember the last time I thought about it seriously. All of these things have been put on the back burner of my life. I've allowed myself to be consumed by taking care of others and made no time at all for ME.
Who cares what I look like? I never go anywhere anyways. Who cares if I eat right? I can eat whatever is available and easy and not think about the calories or nutritional value. Who cares if I exercise? I'm getting older and nothing is going to help all these aches and pains. Besides, everyone else needs so much, and I only have so much time and energy to spare. Everyone else deserves my undivided attention.
Well, this is the end of that kind of thinking!! I deserve to be treated as well as the other people in my life!! It's MY turn NOW!!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
I'm doing better today. I was feeling really down yesterday. I was disappointed with myself,f because I wasn't keeping up with the exercises, involved in the challenge to which I had made a commitment. I was, basically, beating myself up, for a situation which is out of my control.
I was very psyched up when I joined the Spring into Summer Challenge. I thought this would be the perfect time to start exercising. After all, I don't have to go back to work until the 27th of May. However, like so many other times in my life, a family crisis intervened. My time has been spent running back and forth to Pittsburgh everyday. OH WELL!! Things happen that often take priority in my life.
I was feeling so discouraged though, my mood was affecting my ability to deal with the things in my life which I can control. Like how much I'm eating. I was falling into the well of self-pity, which usually ends in emotional overeating. I refuse to go down there again, and if I do slip in, I refuse to stay there.
I'm back in my sane mind now! I wasn't able to do more than 20 minutes of walking today. I had to do that while I was at the hospital in Pittsburgh. I did, however, stay within my calorie limit today. If I can't get in the exercise, I will, at least, stay within my calorie range. This is still better than what I've been doing over the last couple of years; eating whatever and never doing any type of exercise. Maybe it will take me years to lose the weight I need to lose. So what? I've got the rest of my life to work at this. At least I'm working at it now!!
Monday, May 09, 2011
It's been a tough 6 weeks. First, my daughter was in the hospital with pneumonia. While she was there, my dad had a really bad respiratory infection. He's 87 with dementia. He's still able to do most things for himself. His respiratory infection got so bad, however, that he was extremely confused and incontinent for two days. Once the fever broke and he started to recover, his mentality improved. He is not normally incontinent. Except for an occasional "accident" at night, while he's sleeping. Fortunately, that improved also, as his health improved. This entire situation lasted about a week and a half.
About a week later, I had surgery to reconstruct my right thumb joint, remove a cyst from the tendon to my thumb, a release of the tendon, and a release in my right carpal tunnel. It was the most painful surgery I have ever experienced. It's a month now, and I'm still wearing a splint on my right hand.
After my surgery, my daughter started complaining of having trouble breathing and being unable to lie flat in bed. I took her to our primary care physician, who suggested she go back into the hospital. He was unsure of what was causing her symptoms, since her chest xray had improved. The hospital here ended up transfering her to the University of Pittsburg's hospital in Pittsburg. The doctors here were uncomfortable caring for her, since she is a very complicated patient. To make a long story short, it turns out she had a heart attack. She had a cardiac catheterization and three blocked coranary arteries were found. The doctor was able to open and stent one artery. Another one wasn't bad enough for stenting. The third was going to the area of the infarct (where the heart attack occured) and there was no point in stenting it, as the heart muscle in that area had already died.
She's still in the hospital. They can't seem to get rid of the fluid in her lungs. They're taking her back for some kind of venous catheterization tomorrow. It's to determine whether the fluid in her lungs is due to her heart or if there is another cause.
I've been driving to the hospital nearly everyday. It's a two hour round trip. I stay at the hospital for an hour or two. So, we're talking three to four hours daily. I spend my mornings getting my dad up and out to the daycare he attends. I usually get him there around 11am. He's back home at 4:15pm. Then, I have to fix dinner and get him to bed.
I signed up for the Spring into Summer Bootcamp, but I'm finding it nearly impossible to get in the exercise. I'm feeling discouraged and I think it's effecting my diet. Not that I'm pigging out or anything, but I feel like I'm struggling to stay within or close to within my calorie limit for the day.
I refuse to give up.... I may struggle, but I will not quit!!
Monday, April 25, 2011
Why do these things happen? It's a question which is asked over and over without ever having a real answer. No one knows. Why does a young mother lose a child at birth? No one knows what to say. There are, of course, the medical explainations about what went wrong medically. But, what is the comfort in knowing that? What words can we use to comfort a mother at a time like this? Words seem like empty cliches, without depth, without understanding. It must be so painful to experience this type of loss. After carrying a growing being within one's body. Feeling movement and life within and experiencing a closeness which only a mother can feel for that child. Such pain and heartbreak......
Pray for my niece, Nicole, as she goes through this horrible experience. Pray for my great-nephew, Elijah Anthony, as he lies in the arms of our loving creator. Pray for all of those who grieve for a life taken, before it even began.....
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