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More Fun From My Inbox—Tips For Student Pilots

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

1. Takeoffs are optional. Landings are mandatory.

2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller.

3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is dangerous.

4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.

5. The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.

6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.

7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.

8. A "good" landing is one from which you can walk away. A "great" landing is one after which they can use the plane again.

9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

10. You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp.

11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival equals a small probability of survival -- and vice versa.

12. Never let an airplane take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.

13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction.

14. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.

15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

17. Keep looking around. There's always something you've missed.

18. If all you can see out of the windscreen is ground that's going round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not at all as they should be.

19. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminum going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.

20. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, experience usually comes from bad judgment.

21. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward as much as possible.

22. There are old pilots and there are bold pilots. There are, however, no old, bold pilots.

23. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to repeal.

24. Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of takeoffs you've made.

25. The three most useless things to a pilot are altitude above you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.

And a bonus tip: Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth repels them.

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*

My Brother, Bob

Saturday, February 04, 2012

Some of you may remember that last summer Bob fell through a roof that he was working on, 30 feet to the ground. Miraculously, he survived, and has done quite well with his rehab. He was scheduled for rotator cuff surgery yesterday, but it had to be postponed because the anesthesiologist noticed that his EKG, which they ran in September, is abnormal. After a cardiologist reviews it, they will decide about the shoulder surgery.

We thank you for all your prayers, and ask that you continue to pray for this situation.

More Fun From My Inbox—Lunch On The Bank

Thursday, February 02, 2012

A pastor and two of his deacons are out on the river fishing in their rowboat. Twelve o'clock rolls around, and one of the deacons notices a nice spot on the bank to have lunch. He turns to the others and says, "That looks like a nice spot for lunch. What do you say we have lunch over there?"

The other deacon agrees, and so does the pastor. The deacon stands up in the boat, steps out onto the river and walks over to the bank. The pastor looks on with amazement, and thinks to himself, if his deacon is holy enough to walk on water, surely he can.

The other deacon stands up, picks up the picnic basket, steps out of the boat, and walks over to the bank and sits with the first deacon. Again, to his amazement, the pastor thinks again, if his second deacon is holy enough to walk on water, surely he can.

The pastor stands up, steps out of the boat, and sinks into the water. The first deacon turns to the second and says, "Think we should have told him where the rocks are?"

*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*


Wednesday, February 01, 2012

11 more Wii minutes today. Boy do I feel like a wimp! I used to be able to do much more at a my knees are weak by the time I'm on my last exercise...and I'm not nearly as good at the exercises as I used to be.
But, slow and steady emoticonsurpasses emoticonquick-like-a-bunny in the long haul. I've got 2 days in a row now with more activity than tottering around the house. That's a to keep on keeping on.

Wii Mii

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Today, WiiFit thinks I'm 56, much closer to also says I weigh 155. 10 minutes Wii-ing and I'm pooped...sort of. I don't feel like I can do more right now without falling off the balance board, but it's a good kind of tired...which is a big improvement over the utter exhaustion that has been my constant companion for so long. I like it!

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