Wednesday, March 14, 2012
"When is your baby due?" I was asked today!!! I let it roll off my shoulders a) because it came from a resident and most of them have lost their filter and b) because I'm pretty sure she was just being mean and vindictive because she didn't like the news that I was giving her.
In the past, this kind of comment would have REALLY got under my skin, but not this time. I've been fat! I may still be big, but I do NOT think I am fat! Not to mention, what do I have to feel bad about, I've lost 55 pounds for gawds sake!! I am PROUD. So yeah, screw the mean old lady!
Moving on, I have to share with you a forward that I got from my sister-in-law. I -hate- forwards, but this one got me!
When you are sad, I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry ***tard who made you sad.
When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile, I will know you finally got laid.
When you are scared, I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
When you are confused, I will use little words.
When you are sick, stay the h*** away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy a**, and then think about helping your dumba** up.
This is my oath. I pledge it till the end. Why, you may ask? Because you are my friend!
Send to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of four.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Ten Little Things ... About Me
1. I had to return some marbles to my jar. No big deal. I see them coming back out soon enough. Weight is a funny, funny thing.
2. I find myself noticeably happier now that it's Spring. I wouldn't say that I had seasonal depression, but I am definitely less happy in the winter. No matter what horrible things have been happening at work this week, the sun has kept my spirits high.
3. I went running outside today and was sorely, sorely disappointed in my stamina. So, to make up for it, I went to the gym and did 20 minutes on the StairMaster. But the gym was so HOT because of how warm it was outside that I was sweating before I got on the darn machine. My workout = suck. That doesn't happen too often, I guess I was due.
4. I took a road trip with Hubby and friends on Sunday to see Avenue Q. It's hilarious. It's a musical that's best described as the politically incorrect version of Sesame Street.
5. My coworker has a very enviable body - she's totally georgeous. Well, she told another coworker that she thinks my body is "bangin"! Haha! HUGE compliment, considering the source. Which leads me to my next point...
6. I think that all the compliments I'm getting about how good I look are hindering my progress. It's making me believe that my current size is good enough. I've realized this and have reminded myself that I am NOT totally satisfied yet and that this is NOT the finished product! I know... it sounds like horrible motivation, but IT'S MOTIVATION. I want to be smaller and the compliments I've been getting made me forget that.
7. I've been working harder on consuming my freggies. And I've also added yogurt to my pallet. Also, new obsession: Krema Natural Peanut Butter. The only ingredient is peanuts! It tasted funny at first and I paired it with honey, but now I find it just plain delicious and my old Jiffy PB tastes like POO.
8. I'm obsessed with two TV shows right now: Once Upon a Time & Walking Dead. Both amazing.
9. A man came up to me at the gym the other day and started the conversation with "Is your old man here with you today?" followed by "I've seen you here with your man before and didn't want to get in trouble for talking to you." WTF?
10. Cute belts are helping me keep baggy clothing in my wardrobe longer. For example, this shirt and cardigan are too big and looked plain frumpy this morning until I pulled out the belt.
That's all for now. Thanks for putting up with the randomness.
ENJOY THIS WEATHER!!!
Saturday, March 10, 2012
I have a new goal!
I've always hated them, but I'm pretty sure that was ONLY because I couldn't wear them! HA!
I saw a picture of someone rocking their skinny jeans and thought, you know, I could pull that off! (Soon...) WHY NOT! I'm going to rock them.
This goal stems from my last blog where I said I was most likely sabotaging myself because I couldn't visualize my goals: wearing smaller sizes, how my body would look, etc.
I'm starting to visualize it now! And I can see myself in SKINNY JEANS! So here goes nothing... I'm working on a new goal!
(I love this lady, no? PS - This is not me!)
AND, I bought a pair of $2 capris from Old Navy awhile ago. CHEAP! I didn't even try them on in the store because they're like a 14 or 16 or something. I just bought them and stuck them in my GOAL pile. Well, I eventually tried them on and realized that they were pretty much skinny capris. I thought "Oh hellz no could I ever wear these, even if they fit." But I've changed my mind! I'm going to rock the crap out of those pants!
All pictures are from pinterest and are on my style board HERE:
EDIT: None of these pictures are OF ME!
What's your new goal?
Friday, March 09, 2012
So I have awesome news. But first of all, a little update on my journey...
I've been cleaning up my eating, hitting the gym harder, and overall just refocusing on my weight loss after a pretty big realization two weeks ago. I've been stuck at 275 lbs since the beginning of December. Fifty pounds lost and I got stuck. I've still been exercising consistenty, getting a minimum of 1,000 minutes each month. I've also been mindful of what I'm eating and my eating in general has been betterl than my previous unhealthy ways, but still it has not been great - too many sweets, too many fatty foods. And why? Why have I been killing myself in the gym just to sabotage my efforts outside of the gym?
I think I have an answer now. I had a hard time imagining myself any smaller than I am now. I couldn't visualize my future success. I want so bad to get down to size 18 jeans (and then some) but at the same time, I can't imagine myself in size 18s. I haven't been a size 18 since probably 2004 and I couldn't believe that I'd be there again. I didn't believe that it was possible for me to be hot or skinny or any of the other "goals" I've got in my head. I'd be over the moon if I could lose another 50 pounds but part of me thought that was impossible as well. I mean, heck, I've lost 50 already... but lose 100 pounds total? That's unthinkable.
Well that's bull. I CAN do this. And I will. ...I just need to let myself!
So I've been sticking to my calorie range (mostly), I've been making healthier choices. I sprained my ankle two weeks ago - a very valid reason to NOT workout right? WRONG. I worked out to the best of my ability with my screwed up ankle. Something I would have NEVER done before. And I'm quite proud of myself for that.
I've lost seven pounds since recommitting two weeks ago. I'm down 57 pounds now - so close to that 60 lbs trophy that I can taste it. I have a jar of marbles - 50 marbles to be exact, representing the 50 pounds I'd still like to lose. Seven of those marbles are moving their happy little butts into the "pounds lost" jar. But that's not THE News.
The big news is this... I now weigh less than my husband! Two pounds less. Ha. BUT STILL.
I looked at the scale yesterday morning and saw 268 and thought "oh hellz yes". The first thing I did was text Hubby. "How much do you weigh now?" He's at 270. My head spun. I think I may have jumped and twirled.
This had been another goal of mine. When we started dating seven years ago, I did weigh less than him. Over the years, we both gained and I caught up with him. We had both been about the same weight for awhile until he started losing weight. When I started losing 6-12 months after he had, I knew I wanted to weight less than him again someday. I just hope it doesn't stop at a two pound difference. I've got to keep pushing forward!
Here's a picture of us from January:
Also, I found a picture of myself from two years ago and I know that my face was a lot bigger, but MY GOSH, I couldn't believe this picture when I saw it. I used to avoid looking in the mirror because I didn't like how round my face had gotten.
May 2010 - I'm on the right
And this is me this morning. :)
Thanks for reading, have a good day, and remember...
Saturday, February 25, 2012
I'm so sick of my stupid ankle and not being able to move! Waaaah!
On the up-side, it doesn't hurt to put weight on it. But it does generally ache from use. I'm resting it as much as I can, but I'm at work and have to actually does SOME WORK while at work! LOL. Luckily, I'm working the front desk and updating paperwork today, so not too much walking is involved.
My Hubby laughed his head off last night when I told him I couldn't keep up with my residents. I work with cute old people at a retirement home. It's pretty funny to imagine a 25 year old hobbling to keep up with a spry 90 year old, let alone some little hunched over cutie with a walker. Hubby wanted me to line them up in the hallway today and try to race them.
It's extremely neccesary right now, in fact. Aunt Flo stopped my by house yesterday for a lovely visit, so I'm pretty emotional right now. I broke down into tears last night because I was so frustrated with my physical mobility and just darn pissed that I did something so dumb. Of course, crying made Hubby laugh even harder at my ridiculousness. He's not mean, I promise... But he kind of is. LoL.
I'm trying not to cry again today but I'm worrying about my plans for the afternoon and it's upsetting me. And normally I wouldn't cry but that darn Aunt Flo gets me Every Time. I get off work at 3:00 because I have a conference to attend since I'm a volunteer staff member for my (co-ed) fraternity. When I was asked to work today, I had to cancel my plans to help with the conference this morning, but I definitely have to go this afternoon to speak. It's on campus and I'm so frightened about where I have to park that I've roped Hubby into driving me. Furthermore, I was supposed to go to this restaurant/bar for a fellowship event that I organized following the conference. But I'm so worked up about the parking and the stairs and over-working my foot in general that I've decided not to go. So I feel better about the whole thing other than feeling guilty for basically skipping out on the entire day's events. But I think I'll feel better at home on the couch with Hubby and a movie than at a bar with stupid stairs.
So to end on another funny note... everyone is so concerned about my ankle!! Moreso than I am so it's pretty hilarious. Friends... coworkers... residents... all concerned about my well being. It's nice, it really it. Slightly annoying too. Haha. My limp really looks worse than it is, so everyone's concerned. One coworker told me to sit down earlier because she'd get whatever I needed. I told her I had to pee. "Oh.. well... I guess you're on your own there!" LOL!
One resident was so worried about me walking around that he told me he though my boss needed to get me an electric scooter like some of the residents have. He came back to the desk a couple hours later saying that he's had time to "think about the situation" and he'd like to pay for me to rent a scooter.
It was really HARD not to laugh at him.
Too cute. I insisted that I'd be fine without a scooter. He doesn't believe me.
Have a good day, friends. I'm sure trying to.
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