Monday, February 28, 2011
Wow what a not so fun last couple weeks my friends. It all started the day after Valentines. Which it was a wonderful Valentine's Day!! Had a wonderful romantic date night with my husband.
Woke up the next morning with a huge lump on my jaw and ended up with what I have currently..... my tonsils, adenoids, and lymphnoids (I'm sure I missed spelled all of these lol) completely swollen painful and to put it politely, completely oozie with not so nice stuff!! A lovely infection throughout!! I have been to my doctor twice, my dentist twice (wasn't sure if it was a abscessed tooth or something), the ENT doctor, my Rhuematologist, and to the Emergency Room twice.... I've been on 3 different antibiotics and a steroid.
Now for the disclaimer.............
1. If you can't swallow due to throat pain you can't eat!
2. If you can't taste food you don't want to eat!
3. If your so stinkin tired you can't move and therefore you can't make it to the refrigerator to grab food.
4. If you have a week and half of fevers you burn a lot of calories as well!
So over all great way to lose weight if you don't mind feeling like complete dog poo! Or the many trips to doctors. Or the fact that after Valentines that's the only action your going to get because your husband thinks you are a walking plague!
But hey your jeans fit much better!
*On a serious note. I have been sicker than I have ever been before! I was pretty scared there for awhile because I have Rhuematoid Arthritis and I have to take a cancer treatment drug so my immune system is not strong in the first place. I am starting to feel mildly better. I still haven't regained my strength or appetite so I am going to work into it slowly.
** Does anyone have any suggestions on what might be a good option to eat. I need energy and protein packed, not spicy but flavorful!! Nothing really tastes good and it makes it hard for me. Any sickness fighting wonders??
Thursday, January 27, 2011
I WILL ENCOURAGE MYSELF NOT DEFEAT MYSELF!!
Well I am 10 lbs heavier than I was 3 months ago and I am actually OK with that. I have not been eating the way I should or exercising like I had been doing but with the 2 surgeries and with the holidays I think it is understandable. I am not going to be self-destructive and hate on myself and call myself lazy or a failure. I am going to start from scratch and look at the fact that I am still almost 40 lbs lighter than I was a little over 9 months ago! I will lose those 10 lbs plus another 35 lbs! I was rockin the healthy lifestyle 3 months ago - I was the fitness leader in my city - and I will rock it again! Because I'm just like that lol!
I HAVE THINGS TO DO AND PLACES TO SEE!!
This time I have a specific goal that I am going to reach my desired weight for! I am surprising my husband with an 8 day cruise to the Caribbean for Valentine's Day and the cruise is leaving in October 2nd. Which on October 4th we will be celebrating our 2nd Anniversary on the private beach of Labadee, Haiti. (Our first Anniversary was spent with me in an operating room getting hand surgery, so this is going to be our first real Anniversary.) I am so excited about this because...
1) I said I would never go on a cruise because I felt way too fat! Yes I know :)
2) I have never been out of the country! Yes I know :)
3) I have never felt comfortable in a bathing suit ever, let alone a bikini!!!
but I am going on this cruise at my goal weight and I am going to wear a bikini and I am going to own it!! That bikini is going down!!
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS.... IT'S ABOUT SELF-LOVE!
Losing weight and getting fit is great, it's wonderful, it's what we want right? Yes! But it's also about learning who we are, what we want out of life, and loving who we are.... what ever size we are. I want to get on that boat and have a sense of calm that I am exactly where I want to be. I don't want any doubts of "oh if I had only done that".... or "Am I really skinny enough".... I want to be happy with me and I want to love me!
I think this will be the harder goal to reach for me. I am 100% my worst and hardest critic. I have never felt good enough. I want to learn to accept who I am and know that I am the same as everyone else.... imperfect. Perfect in my imperfections. This is supposed to be a romantic, beautiful getaway and I want it to be just that. I don't want to spend my whole time self-conscious that everyone looks better than I do. I want to forget all of that and just be myself and hold my husband's hand down the beach and be in love!! With him and me :)
SO I HAVE 248 DAYS & COUNTING!
I AM GOING TO GET THIS THING DONE!!
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Hey everyone :) I just wanted to send out a quick blog and let everyone know just how much I have missed you all!!
It has been very hectic and as I have done in the past the first thing I do when I get overwhelmed is stop taking care of me. It has been a real struggle and I have not been counting calories and exercising like I should. I thank goodness have only gained 5 pounds but those are 5 pounds I am going to take off again plus another 25 to go to reach my goal. I have worked to hard not to reach that goal...... plus I want that tattoo I promised myself as my goal reward!!
I am starting fresh today!!! right now!!! this exact moment!!! and I will do it because I know I am the strong, bold woman who can get it done!!
So no more disappearing act!! You all get ready to get tired of seeing me because this chickie is back!!!!! I am sooooooo DONE BEING THE FAT GIRL!!!!
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