PROVERBS31JULIA   110,327
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PROVERBS31JULIA's Recent Blog Entries

Update on my dad...

Saturday, December 22, 2012

So much has been going on past week or two, and I can't begin to cover lt all. Some family drama is in the mix now. But after an surgery to attempt to place stents in thr lines going between kidneys and bladder, which failed, doctors discovered the cancer(s) are pretty much eating him up from inside out. Doubtless the toxins are what is affecting his mind. He only has Medicare part A, no part B coverage at all. It's complex why not, and yet simple why it is the case, but no point in going there.

My brother and his wife drove up from Katy and visited with Dad like 20-30 minutes, with Dad railing on about some conspiracy. Finally he asked Dad if Dad knew who he was. Dad said he was tne doctor. My brother said "No, I'm your son..(name)". He said Dad kinda looked startled and said "Thank you for coming up to see me!" and he said he might have seen Dad for about two minutes before Dad slipped back into his mental haze.

So we're planning to go down there. Gotta stop by my mother-in-law's house in SE Okla on the way, to make sure gas heat is still on, and then head on down to Abilene, TX.

Oh and I've never met this gal he married four years ago, who separated two years ago...

I hope she is nice, but we've had some friction, over the phone lines. I think part of this is from hospital staff having mistaken identity and talking to a woman erroneously believed to be his wife. So they sald I was in charge. Then they found her, and she is in charge... But she doesn't really know him! She has only lived with him two of the four or maybe five years that they met, "dated" and married. I've known him 50+ years... Thankfully, after I stated my piece, she seems to be a bit more inclusive on the phone. We'll see how she is when I meet her. I understand she has some health issues of her own. So we'll just have to stay with it and work with what we have...

I'm on phone typing and tired, so hope to write more later. They are trying to get him to a hospice type place, but no one wants to accept him now - they are all short-staffed for the next week or so.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AWOOD1973 12/27/2012 3:21AM

    Wish I had some magic wand to wave and make everything all better. I am praying for you and your family. Please keep us posted... emoticon

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ECOAGE 12/24/2012 12:24AM

    Sending you wishes for continued inner strength.

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PHEBESS 12/23/2012 9:58PM

    Wow, that's a lot all at once! Take care of yourself too, and I hope things aren't too stressful. They won't be easy - but keep taking long deep breaths.

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JUDI_CUTIE 12/23/2012 5:15PM

    Julia,
I am so sorry to hear about what your family is going through.
Judi

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SUNSHINEGB 12/23/2012 11:51AM

    emoticon Julia, you've got more than your share to contend with right now. I hope they'll be able to place your dad in a hospice as they take such good care of those in their final days/weeks of life. Praying for you to have a safe journey and a better outcome with your dad's wife. Keep the faith!
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Comment edited on: 12/23/2012 11:51:25 AM

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SPARKLINGHOPE 12/23/2012 10:44AM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 12/23/2012 10:18AM

    Hugs, sugar. It's so hard to deal with parents' health issues long distance, let alone have an obstacle like someone not wanting to share information about YOUR FATHER! HUGS.

You're in my thoughts and prayers.

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JANNEPERRY 12/23/2012 8:30AM

    Julia, so sorry for the health/family issues for your dad and family. Any time of year is difficult for that. Especially when you don't live close by. Your dad is fortunate to have a smart, good-hearted advocate in you, working for his best. Hang in there. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

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ASILLA 12/23/2012 8:03AM

    emoticon

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ILOVEROSES 12/23/2012 5:43AM

    emoticon emoticon

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M77355 12/23/2012 4:52AM

    Aw Julia, I'm sad for what you and the rest of your family is going through. I'll pray for strength, wisdom and faith to see you through all of this.

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MRE1956 12/23/2012 4:46AM

    Why, oh WHY must there be *drama* of ANY kind when dealing with such sad issues as you have? This disturbs and saddens me no end - especially during holiday seasons!

I hope you get some sense of peace while you're working through all this......I will keep you, your dad and the rest of your family in my best thoughts! Please be gentle with yourself and take care!

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LINDA! 12/22/2012 11:56PM

    emoticon

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My Dad is in the hospital...

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Just found out today that my dad has been in the hospital since Sunday. One of the Brethren from his congregation saw fit to check up on him before the cold snap that was to hit Kansas Okla and Texas, and discovered him talking incoherently. It's a miracle that an email from Amazon inspired me to call my dad's cell phone, which he had with him at the hospital. Or maybe coincidence, for those of you with an alternative spiritual belief system - I don't care what it is called.

I was able to get the number for hospital case manager and I knew going in that she might not believe me ( HIPPA laws and all that privacy but really no privacy stuff.). Miracles - she was really patient with my deafness over the phone (as was the guy who gave me her phone number and was patient while I was repeating to make sure I really got it.). She had to know for sure about me, before she could share info on his condition, and I understood thst. It was really a bit of struggle to get through calmly so that we could both get the info we needed )exchanging phone numbers, emails, names, etc.).

Evidently his estranged wife ( like a cult bride) won't have anything to do with him or the hospital earlier when case manage was looking for info about him or his family. So CM ( case manager) was evidently already trying to find me on thr Internet. I think she was pleasantly surprised I called her. Or just as awed by the miraculous coincidence. I really don't know.

I need more sleep. Evidently the doctor will call tomorrow to gain permission to do some procedures. I had raised the issue that I didn't know enough of my dad's affairs to know if I was listed as a Power of Attorney or any such like thst. She told me that since I'm first born child, thst Texas law says I'm next in line, since he is divorced from my mom and his currrent "wife" evidently has nothing to do with him.

Sigh.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CANDOSUE52 12/22/2012 8:18PM

   
I hope your Dad is doing okay, Julia!

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CAREN_BLUEJEANS 12/16/2012 10:20AM

    Wishing your father a speedy recover.

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DOLLYHOLLY 12/15/2012 7:47PM

    Sorry to hear about your dad. Hope the doctors are able to help and that you get the rest you need too.

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JESSIKA_56 12/15/2012 12:51PM

    emoticon

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ITISABOUTME 12/14/2012 12:27PM

    So sorry to hear of your bad news. Hope things are getting better and your dad is on the mend

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LNSYLVSDOGS 12/14/2012 5:05AM

    emoticon emoticon SOOOO glad you called when you did. Hope he is now on the mend and the complicated issues will resolve themselves. Sending prayers. emoticon

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HOPEFULHIPPO 12/13/2012 5:17PM

    emoticon

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PHEBESS 12/13/2012 5:03PM

    So sorry to hear this - hope it's something easy to fix, and he'll be back to normal very soon. (Older people can easily get dehydrated, forget to eat, etc.)

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1CRAZYDOG 12/13/2012 2:08PM

    Oh my! HUGS and major prayers for you and your Dad. It is sad how things turn out some times. Wishing him a speedy recovery.

HUGS my dear.

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SALTYCHOCOLATE 12/13/2012 10:24AM

    Will keep your Dad and you in my prayers.

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SALTYCHOCOLATE 12/13/2012 10:22AM

    Will keep your Dad and you in my prayers.

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NUMD97 12/13/2012 9:27AM

    Sorry for your travails, Julia. I hope that your dad makes a speedy recovery.

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JANNEPERRY 12/13/2012 7:49AM

    Sorry to hear about your dad. I'm glad you were able to get in touch with him and the hospital in a timely manner. I'll keep him in my prayers. emoticon

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GARDENCHRIS 12/13/2012 7:00AM

    sorry to hear this hope you can help resolve the issues.

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AWOOD1973 12/13/2012 2:31AM

    Oh my goodness! So sorry to hear what is going on with your dad (and you). I hope that all goes well and that you get through this with a sane mind. emoticon

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JILLYBEAN25 12/13/2012 1:30AM

    I'm sorry you had such terrible news and feel so conflicted. I hope you both find healing in this time. You're in my prayers!

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My viewpoints on Math Word Problems

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

I just saw this on Facebook and I just HAD to share this poster. It explains so much about me....




So now you know.

I'll understand if you feel you need to unfriend me...

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOLLYHOLLY 12/15/2012 7:45PM

    Aww, cute!

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HOPEFULHIPPO 12/12/2012 12:09PM

    emoticon yup....that all makes sense to me.... emoticon

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JANNEPERRY 12/12/2012 11:33AM

    emoticon emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 12/12/2012 8:48AM

    Hmmm...thought aliens were green! Boy, that describes my brain on math too! LOL You're not alone.

HUGS

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GARDENCHRIS 12/12/2012 7:17AM

    emoticon

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NTRACEY02 12/12/2012 6:23AM

    I like purple emoticon

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JILLYBEAN25 12/12/2012 12:30AM

    Um, we must have the same sort of brain 'cuz that is certainly how that feels to me.

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NORWOODGIRL 12/11/2012 11:31PM

    Love your sense of humor! emoticon

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I think I know what happened!!

Monday, December 10, 2012

Remember last thursday's blog? that headache?? I think I have figured out what that was about!!

look at The DailySpark blog for today:


www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=is_
your_exercise_routine_turning_into_a_h
eadache



Many of those things I was doing wrong before, during and after my scrubbing-tub-like-a-mad-woman routine. and the things that I seemed to want to do afterwards - like drinking a big glass of water emoticon,
some coffee later on emoticon ,
and a meal later on emoticon, all are mentioned in the article.

I just hadn't PLANNED ahead how I was going to exercise in the tub.... but will try to remember emoticon to be more careful next time emoticon I am so possessed to clean the tub (sooner rather than later, so it doesn't get as cruddy and as much to do!).

Too bad I wasn't able to wear my FitBit in the shower while doing all that cleaning!! I likely rcked up some serious activity "points". Whew!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JANNEPERRY 12/11/2012 8:16AM

    Thanks for the link! I used to tell myself that the kids would be responsible for the cleaning of their bathroom, and they were--until-----when it gets to that point, then I had to become the cleaning maniac! It's a marathon, not a sprint--pace yourself!

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HOPEFULHIPPO 12/10/2012 10:53PM

    glad it got all figured out :o)

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PHEBESS 12/10/2012 2:48PM

    Yup, water and nutrition after a vigorous workout! (And scrubbing is definitely vigorous!)

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JILLYBEAN25 12/10/2012 2:34PM

    WHOA! This happens to me every single time I run. In junior high and high school, I always dreaded that day during the school year where we'd have to run a timed mile and make it within a certain number of minutes/seconds. I'd always do just fine making it (usually, with a few seconds to spare) but for the rest of the day and the next day I always got what I figured was a migraine. I've never run for exercise since. Thanks for posting this!

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1CRAZYDOG 12/10/2012 1:50PM

    Interesting! Now you have an idea of what to do!

HUGS

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Overdid things... (this is more of a diary or journal type entry....).

Thursday, December 06, 2012

Woke up and went for a walk. Kinda hard to start my FitBit and my MaPMyWalk app on the iPhone at the same time. Both agreed that I had walked basically 20 minutes, so, oh well, that's my "10 minute streak" for the day. One said I walked 17.8 mph and the other made up some random number about 20 mph. Maybe it was measuring only the very last part of the walk, rather than an overall average?

Had my bowl of oatmeal and later on a cup of coffee... read paper. Did some email.

Then I had to take a shower as I was running out of time and had to be one place at 11 am and then I was to meet my husband for lunch and then I'd go to the ENT doc for my audiology appointment.

Well... I usually wash my hair in the tub. (long story) Today I used the guys' shower and it was nasty! I put my swim shoes on to protect my feet from whatever cooties there since they don't clean up after themselves. Got my scrubbie brush and a bunch of soap and scrubbed the dickkens out of that tub. But it was hard - lots of bending down and back up and head between my knees practically and that just wore me out. Pretty soon, I felt this weird headache coming up behind my head over the top and the sides towards the front. Got on out of the shower and made it into my room to get dressed.... but was feeling ill. Just feeling odd...I must have overdid it in the tub, since I was scrubbing like a madwoman knowing that I really didn't have time but didn't want to do it later in the day, but still grossed that it was so dirty.

Got dressed, somehow drove myself to the first place to get the car worked on, had to take the back roads as I didn't feel like I was stable enough to drive on the freeway. I kept drinking water... felt like I needed to eat but also felt sort of queasy. I should have taken my blood sugar then but I don't know if that would have been good info...

Called my husband as he was basically across the street, and he came on over and then I debated whether to eat or to go get some aspirin or what. Decided I really wanted to eat since I had done quite a bit more exercise and with that cup of coffee that I don't usually eat before exercise (did you read the Spark article elsewhere in the Health news about not drinking caffeine before exercise?).

We went to eat lunch - I picked out a beef veggie soup and a chicken veggie salad. And water. I gradually started feeling some better but still just had that feeling like I'd been beaten all over.

My husband really needed to go back to work, but I had this 2 pm appointment and still felt cruddy so I asked if he could drive me there and be there with me. So he did (one of the huuuuuge blessings of being salaried and on flex time and well, just the corporate culture of the place he works for, plus he's been that career for 35+ years. Of course, now that I'm writing this, he's back at work so he's putting in his 8 hours just later in the evening!!!).

So we get there and we'd already rearranged our Flexible Spending so that starting in January we'd have Flex Spending funds for at least one of the two hearing aids... and so we just visited with the audiologist. I wasn't really sure why she wanted me to come back - maybe because we didn't have time to finish that discussion after the last session last week when I had the long audiogram session (which always tires me and wears me out and I don't know, maybe it's just always a hugely emotional experience for me, just so mentally and emotionally draining. I put up with a lot at various doctors - poked prodded, shots, mammograms, X-Rays, 2 years of braces, drill into my jaw to install the dental implants, MRI, caesarian section, spinal block, maybe not as many procedures as many people have had....but audiograms are the worst things for me to deal with! I guess there's some baggage in all that, but in any case, it is what it is.

So anyway today we're sitting around and she's kinda starting up her pitch a bit, trying to determine what she can and can't do, if a loaner is available, if we we have insurance now, whatever... and suddenly it dawns on her where my husband works and she says "Oh Wait!! We just got paid by your current insurance for a pair of hearing aids for this other guy at your office." See - we've got this insurance but effective January 1, our company is switching to a different health insurance company. I kept asking my husband what kind of coverage we had, and for him to give me the propaganda and listing of the insurance coverage details... so the past two years I never got this info out of him. And I think he was so pessimistic, he never would make the effort of looking it up (maybe he thought it would get my hopes up? We've had such horrible experiences in the past....).

Anyway, the way it stands now, maybe the insurance will cover it even though we're just about to run out of time. She's got a plan to contact the insurance company or have her insurance guru do it tomorrow . If they deny it, then back up plan B will be the Flex Spending starting in January, as she's pretty sure the new insurance company we are being switched to will be a step or two lower in quality (or extra frustration levels...depending on one's point of view, I guess.). As she put it, she didn't know exactly what benefits there were for the employees but as a provider, that company was really awful to work with....would deny claims for the most capricious reasons (joking that even the Pope would have problems dealing with this insurance company!)...

And of course, we don't get a choice as to keeping the previous insurance company, since they've evidently been "voted off the island" by the head poobahs and bean-counters. To quote some famous management expert, can't remember the name - "The beatings (floggings, whippings, etc) will continue until employee morale improves...."


Soooo I have these loaners... keep in mind, this isn't a quick fix. I'm still deaf. I am hearing a lot of "stuff" but not necessarily clearer speech... guess it's a learning process, so they say.

Right now, my Channukah album playing through blue tooth off my iPhone iPod is sounding really tinny and horrible...

I'm tired!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRSCLAUS46 12/10/2012 4:58AM

    emoticon Just went thru getting donated hearing aide programed for my loss and a new ear mold--it is a very difficult time making the adjustment--like you said: what sound you do hear is horrible at first. Hope it gets easier for you! Good luck with the insurance company too--mine just denied what I had done as it was not done by my primary care provider (must check into this--he isn't qualified to do it!) and they claim I did not have a referral (which I most certainly did). Take care of yourself and have a wonderful Holiday Season!


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JANNEPERRY 12/8/2012 5:08PM

    Rest up! Difficult decisions are always exhausting for me!

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123ELAINE456 12/7/2012 1:12PM

  So sorry You had such a rough tough Day. I hope You are able to get a good night sleep and tomorrow will be better for You. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Day. Take Care. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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1CRAZYDOG 12/7/2012 9:52AM

    (((((((HUGS)))))))) Our insurance starts on Jan. 1 with a new group. I anticipate LOTS of fun . . . NOT! Wishing you all the best.

Had to laugh @ your comments that even the Pope would have difficulty dealing with insurance companies AND "The beatings (floggings, etc.) will continue til employee morale improves." YUP . . . that's how to do it for sure!

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JILLYBEAN25 12/7/2012 12:25AM

    It sounds like a very difficult day for you. Glad it's over? I bet you are. At least tomorrow is another day. emoticon

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DIET_FRIEND 12/7/2012 12:16AM

    Thanks for sharing your day. It is a blessing to have a good husband. HOpe the hearing aid situation comes together in your favor ASAP. You are a blessing with your family for getting to that tub! I don't like cleaning tubs myself.

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UMBILICAL 12/6/2012 11:27PM

  Good note

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