Friday, July 20, 2012
Well, to me it was a big one. I have been stressed all week about something; basically it was a job proposal I had to write for some freelance work; lots of angst etc. I have REALLY felt stressed, wondering how to write the proposal, wondering if I even had the time to take this extra job on (since I DO want to schedule time for exercise this fall when I am back teaching), wondering if I was capable or just a bogus teacher after all.
My default mode when I am very stressed is emotional eating. Yup, break out the chocolate chips and ice cream. Must calm and comfort myself. Haven't messed up on this one in a while, but today without thinking I reached for the junk.
And guess what? Out of (new) habit I counted out just 5 chips and put them in my mouth. Then I heard a little voice (must have been from Sparkpeople!) saying, "Will that really make you feel better? If food isn't the problem, then food isn't the solution." And wow! I listened!
The food DIDN'T solve anything--except to give me a rush of joy to realize that today I had actually conquered a decades-old habit.
If you look at my food tracker you'll see that many days I allow myself a few chocolate chips, a banana smoothie, a few almonds. That is OK. It is part of my plan. So it's not like I feel deprived at all.
THANK YOU Sparkpeople! Love this new way of living.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
I am SO excited to say that I have lost 30 lbs as of today. Wow. I never would have thought this possible. I have only a couple of lbs more until I am at the upper end of a healthy BMI, and only 20 more until I am in the middle, where I want to be. I could not have come so far without Sparkpeople and God giving me the strength and motivation. I also thank Him for generally good health. . . better than I deserve, considering how I've been overweight for 20 years and haven't really taken care of myself like I should.
Anyway the not so great news. . .I have been doing the walk/run your way 5K, and I am finishing up week 3. I am running on grass. . . but I think I have developed (or aggravated) a stress fracture. Not good. I will probably go see the doc in a day or two, but in the meantime, forget running. I am also doing exercise videos and walking a couple of miles a day with the dog; hope I don't have to give that up! Today, after biking and dog walk, I am trying to elevate it--sigh. Probably needs ice. Oh no! I hope this doesn't mean the end of anything! I have osteopenia, which I guess put me at higher risk, so I probably should have listened to my doc when he told me (30 lbs ago) that I "don't have a runner's build so shouldn't try". . . but I lost weight so I thought I would.
Sigh. On a positive note, I am loving biking. Did 12 miles this morning in the beautiful countryside where I live.
I am also starting to plan for the school year--a dose of reality.
Hope y'all are doing well!
Thursday, July 05, 2012
So, quick check: What does the word "grace" mean to you? As in, God's grace?
I confess, it's one of those specialized Bible words that I kinda don't stop to think about when I am reading. I know we are saved by grace through faith (Eph. 2:8), and that it is a gift of God. But I guess my default definition is it's just God overlooking our sins, or it's spiritual gifts, or even "gracefulness"-- poised or gentle behavior and speech.
But hey! I saw this today in Titus 3:4-7: Grace is "the kindness and love of God our Savior. . . not because of righteous things we had done. . . having been justified by His grace. . ."
And Hebrews 4:15-16 "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one (Jesus) who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."
Reread those verses and substitute "kindness and love" for grace. That's who God is! Jesus came bringing grace; the Father is on a throne of grace. When our undisciplined ways and poor choices get the best of us, God is not saying, "Well, OK, I'll overlook it this time." His throne is kindness and love; our advocate is Jesus, who totally sympathizes with us, having been there, and He GIVES US his grace. Kindness and love--and all that He is to help us--"Christ in you, the hope of glory." (Col. 1:27)
Hope this encourages someone. Thinking of God seeing me, his faltering child, with kindness and love, and Christ himself pulling for me before the Father, encourages me!
Thursday, June 28, 2012
I feel so blessed to have seen all 4 of my chillens and both wives this month. They are all in their 20's, but live scattered in PA and NY. We just got back from a trip to Buffalo--really a great, fun city, despite its economic woes. Went sailing, saw Shakespeare in the Park, walked, hung out with my chillens. My son and DIL are making a difference there in the inner city. So proud.
Lots of biking, walking, eating a tad over--sheesh the food thing is still hard. Oh my gosh Korean Tacos are the best! I guess I will always be a food addict. Yesterday--while on the phone with my sis--I mindlessly gulped a quart of blueberries I'd just picked, and followed it up with about 20 chocolate chips. Sigh. I've been away a lot this month, and only lost 3 lbs. I had been losing 7 a month. I guess I should be happy about that but instead I suddenly feel fat & discouraged. Need to remind myself that I CAN do this. Really. I am tall, and the middle of my "healthy" range is around 140. I will be OK with 145. But that won't happen until Jan 1, 2013.
Well OK I bought bigger weights yesterday for the SP 28-day bootcamp video. I am near the end of it. So I suddenly went up from 2 lb weights (all I had; for one-handed stuff I held them together to make 4 lbs, or added a resistance band) to 8 lb weights. Did the 52 minute Day 26 workout with 8 lb weights and now I think I am going to croak. Too much on my arms! Not fun! And I still have to do my 2.5 mile dog walk. And play guitar at the nursing home this afternoon on these arms! And help someone move tonight. A bit much today. Well I will get stronger.
Sparkies, we can do this. I think I need to read and blog more. And drink WATER when I think I need to eat. That helped me before. Hugs to all of you as you think about vacations or just spending a little extra time outdoors in God's beautiful creation.
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