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PRECIOUS_JEWEL's Recent Blog Entries

Starting Over Again...Mean girl vs. Nice girl

Saturday, November 15, 2014

I am good at beating up on myself...my friend calls it "mean girl." It's like there are two of me...one is being really mean to me and telling me what a failure I am. It's that perfectionist thing that says "if you can't do it perfectly, then it is wrong."I do that negative self-talk in all areas of life, not just health. My boss at work will tell you that when I make an error, it's the worst thing in world.

But there is another "me" that just keeps getting back up no matter how many times I fall down. I am grateful that this resiliency remains. When I go down, I may go down hard. I might even stay down for awhile but sooner or later, something has got to change. So here we go again...

How can I be gentle to me? Failure (if that's even the right thing to call this) is part of life and how much sweeter success will be because of the times I missed the mark. I think I will consider this a "relapse" into old ways. For a time, I didn't want to even log in to SP because I would see how the days are ticking away and I'm still not where I want to be. I had a "why bother" attitude for awhile thinking that a healthy happy is life is for others but not for me. To heck with that! I don't know where that thinking comes from but it's not serving me. I don't want to live the rest of my years feeling sluggish and unhealthy. No way!

Looking back on my SP entries, I was at my happiest when I was doing something toward the goal...anything...no matter how small. I was taking some action and moving forward. It doesn't have to be all or nothing. This time, I will be nice to me.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WOLFRUNNERONE 11/15/2014 4:11PM

    lol - I can relate - the good news is that your also your own best friend - the one that will always be honest with yourself - for me - I finally realized I can not run away from myself and know what I realized I was not that bad after all - and I stopped listening to the bad side and began to see all the good that I really am - confidence arose and the weight came off - emoticon

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JOLIEN99 11/15/2014 10:13AM

  emoticon

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DINAOREILLY 11/15/2014 10:12AM

    I understand completely. It feels some times that I am my own personal saboteur. I have never fully understood why and bad habits are hard to brak but I, too. Am in a mission to re-engage with myself and start to become the woman I was me want to be. Slim, healthy. Content and productive. Hugs and thanks for sharing.

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Revisiting my Goals...am I on track?

Sunday, January 27, 2013

I just re-read my Spark Page. I have the lofty goal of where I want to end up, but I also had some action goals that don't have an end....I forget so easily but I was pleased to see that I was meeting these goals more often than not these days.

Strive to eat 1200 calories per day~This is where I calculated I need to be at, (based on BMR) to lose a pound a week because I'm not very tall or young. Much more than that and I will only maintain my weight. It seemed impossible to do at one time. Most days I still don't get down that low but I am a lot closer than I used to be and some days I do stay within that range. I know it's possible now. I know about nutrient dense foods and how to fill up on lower calorie items. I am eating much cleaner.

Eat More Fruits and Vegetables~I didn't have a set number in mind. I know there is a recommended daily amount and I just wanted to reach for adequacy but I'm dangerously close to eating MOSTLY fruits and vegetables because I've been juicing green vegetables daily and also eating fruits and vegetables with almost every meal & snack. It's like the mainstay of my diet now instead of an afterthought. I am consuming green leafy things like Kale now, and it wasn't that long ago that I was afraid to taste it because it was foreign to me. Wow, that's progress in my book!

Break Addiction to Diet Soda and Consume Enough Water~I haven't "broken" my addiction and that sort of goes hand in hand with my water intake. I reach for a diet ginger ale more easily than a glass of water but I am not drinking diet cola...at least it's clear so it looks more like water ha!ha!..I am drinking more water though by adding lemon, lime or orange slices to it and keeping it with me. I'm doing better with it, and getting a little anti-oxidant with my water as a bonus.

Exercise at least 3 times a week~It's happened but the truth is, it's more like once or twice a week.

I am not expecting to be perfect anymore. I know that I will continue to work at it. I am just enjoying the journey to health right now.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ORANGE81 1/27/2013 6:02PM

    Sounds like you are meeting your goals. I keep trying to do the low end of my range since i turned 50 this past summer and it takes a month or longer to lose a pound where as 2 years ago I was losing almost a pound a week. Oh well like you I keep trying to do better. Keep up the fruits and vegetables. I use crystal lite in some of my water but I can go straight up!

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Can the Low Income Eat Healthy?...Food Bank Diet

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Today, I read a blog about how expensive it is to eat well. I really related and felt inspired to share my experience.

Here's the blog I read:

http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public
_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5180514

I've been dealing with periods of unemployment throughout 2012 and I have gotten food from local food banks when I had to. All I can say is that it has been near impossible for me to not gain weight when living on this sort of food. No surprise, I've put on 20 lbs this past year. I have never been a big pasta eater but that has been the mainstay of the food bank diet. Not to mention that bread is also at the top of the list. The rest is nearly all highly processed and junk food. Never have I felt so ill with all the blood sugar spikes and drops I've experienced. There has been the occasional can of tuna or chicken and once I even got a little fresh fruit which I've gotten super excited about. In shorter supply, there have been canned vegetables and bags of beans so I am learning to cook more and to utilize the high protein and high fiber items when I can.

All I can say is that this past year has been a struggle and I am glad that I didn't wait for the new year to make another empty resolution that I'm going to change my habits. Being healthy is a daily thing that has to be part of me every day for the rest of my life regardless of circumstances. There is no magic time in the future when it's going to be easy. Yes, I may have to eat what's there if it's not good for me or even what I feel like eating because I'm not going to starve either but I can change the things that are in my control.

The adversity I've experienced has made me realize that there are always going to be obstacles of some sort and all I can do is the best I can with what I have. I can still make small changes every day. I'm glad that water is still free and so is exercise.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WICKEDKISSES 1/6/2013 5:32AM

    I am also having this problem. On Disability and so much of my cash goes to rent and utilities. I've cut out what I can, but without a source of healthy veggies, I'm stuck.

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CHARMIN944 12/30/2012 11:44AM

    It's so frustrating to eat well during these economic times. I feel your frustration also. All we can do is survive until times get better and it will get better.

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Leting go of perfection and hit all the SP nutrition goals for the first time!

Saturday, December 29, 2012

I am feeling pretty excited because not only did I stay within my calorie range yesterday which is only like the 2nd or 3rd time since recommitting to SP around Thanksgiving, but I also ate "right." I got enough protein, didn't go over on fat yet still got enough of the right kind (well below the max on saturated fat), stayed on the lower end of the carb range, got enough fiber (barely), didn't go over on cholesterol (usually do because I eat eggs more than occasionally), and I even drank enough water which is always a challenge for me! It definitely helped that I ate more servings of fruit and veggies; that does fill me up and nourishes me. Surprisingly, I even broke down and had one of my homemade applesauce oat muffins (healthier recipe) from the freezer and I still did okay. So, I am realizing that I can indulge a little if I am doing well the rest of the day...and because I chose the healthier indulgence (instead of the brownies which were also in the freezer). SP has been telling me that little changes do add up...and maybe if I could just exercise 10 minutes today instead of zero minutes, it would be PROGRESS! Though usually I think 10 minutes isn't even going to begin to address my problem since I am so far gone, after my little success yesterday, today progress is good enough! I don't have to be PERFECT today!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LEMONCHEESECAKE 12/31/2012 3:41PM

    Good job!!! =)

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Cookie Monster

Saturday, December 15, 2012

I had been doing pretty well with healthy eating the last couple of days, and avoiding some of the temptations of this time of year but yesterday (Friday), I pulled a homemade cookie from the freezer and thawed it in the microwave. I thought it would be just one...thus started another binge...I think I had 6 in total but I lost count. I was feeling lonely and the sad events in Connecticut were on my mind so I think this was emotional eating. I felt nauseous from the overindulgence. One cookie has over 100 calories in it... and butter, pecans, chocolate chips, oatmeal...very rich. I want to remember how I feel when I overdo it. One was good but the rest were sickening. I refuse to beat up on myself for it though. It is done and I am going to get right back on track by drinking a glass of water to detox and as a reminder to be kind to my body.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARNETTELEE 12/15/2012 4:58AM

  Sorry, one cookie at a time!

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TCANNO 12/15/2012 3:42AM

    You are on the right track but it is not easy this time of year.

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