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PORTIAWILLIS's Recent Blog Entries

Day 1 with spark coach

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Decided to reread the book and use spark coach today. I have decided I need to be accountable to someone other than myself. I want to succeed at this and in the same process I hope to learn more about myself. It really struck home to that to succeed you first must know where you want to be. I find myself 57 and at a loss as to what I want to do with the rest of my life. I believe the weight I can't seem to lose and keep off is really more about not knowing what I really want to do with my life. I am going to work hard to find my way back to being the person God wants me to be and what I want for myself.

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GRANDMASHUNGRY 12/21/2012 7:32PM


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Reality Check

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Woke up this morning with a bad attitude. Not sure why I was so depressed. Nothing new that I could think of to cause it other than the usual thing of not being able to find a job. I made myself get out and go for a walk. This usually helps but today not so much. It was a beautiful day, sun shining and the trail on the river was really pretty. I really concentrated on being in the moment and not on walking faster or longer. I decided to go watch my granddaughter play basketball tonight. That helped a great deal. It was fun yelling and cheering for the team. On my way home I decided to except that today was just that a day and it is almost over. Tomorrow is another day and another chance to get over myself. Everyone has bad days. Here's hoping for a better day tomorrow. I have nothing to complain about. My heart goes out to the families that have lost so much. How they can go on is just impossible to imagine. I pray that some how they will find a way to acceptance and peace.



Thursday, December 13, 2012

Walked 4.06 miles in 1hr 6min today. I think that is my fastest time yet. It is the longest walk sense my knee surgery. No pain at all today. It is amazing to me how quickly walking on a regular basis is helping my breathing. Walked this trail about 1 year ago and had to stop several time on the hills. Made it the entire 4 miles without stopping today.

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GRANDMASHUNGRY 12/14/2012 9:25PM

    Way to go!

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Total disaster

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Boy did I learn a lesson. No matter how good you think you are doing DISASTER is waiting to strike if you don't follow your plan. I went away for the weekend to see a friend I haven't seen in almost a year. I had good intentions to spark daily and to track my foods. Well I did neither and on top of that I had one too many cocktails. Than to top it all off it was raining and did not get my walk in either Sunday or Monday. Did exercise for 10 minutes Monday. The worse thing about all of this is it sent me into condemnation mode. The worse I felt the worse my self talk went. From there everything I did or said just made me more depressed. When I get depressed I don't get weepy and sad I get mad. I can't stand myself like that. Last night I determined I would jump back in and lord knows I meant to but things got even crazier today. Now here I sat having ate everything I could get my hands on today, didn't track any of it, yelled at my husband and wanted to bang my head on the wall. No exercise cause my daughter called and wanted me to drive 11/2 hours to pick up my grandchildren and bring them to her. Did I say NO. Of course not I continued my pity party doing things I did not want to do but complaining to myself the whole time how everyone takes advantage of me. The only real person who took advantage of me was myself. I should have said NO and went to exercise and get my head straight. Enough complaining. Want to say I'm sorry for this posting but felt real good to get it out . Now I am going to get my butt up and go exercise, come home and plan my meals for tomorrow. Thanks everyone


Long Night

Wednesday, December 05, 2012

Last night my husband injured his leg at work. We ended up in the ER till six am this morning . When we got home I sleep till 12 and have been up since than. He is doing much better but on crutches with a leg brace. No fractures just a pulled muscle. Going to be off work for 2 weeks and he just went back to work. Worst time for this to happen. I am not working and money is tight. Can we say STRESS. Going to need constant sparking to stay on track. I am a stress eater. Been hungry all day. Managed to eat within a few calories of my plan but no exercise. Try to do better tomorrow.

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PEPPYPATTI 12/5/2012 6:05PM

    It is rough to stay on track when life throws you curve balls. Just do the best you can!
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