People who snore always fall asleep first.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. ~Erma Bombeck
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
The best way to get rid of a telemarketer is to ask them what they are wearing.