Sunday, July 24, 2011
I'm writing this down. Marking it. In today's paper, the Sunday section, a quotation inset for a little profile on someone or other... made me tear up, tear way up. The quote:
"(Mydad) always said, 'Jump into the river. It will just move and you'll make decisions as you go. Never be hesitant."
Jump into the river.
It will just move and
You'll make decisions as you go.
I've never well taken that advice. It is excellent advice. Probably. Yep.
Way deep from my center. Resonant. Resonances. And the tears, where this advice or directive -- which I've been given many times in life, usually by others, usually in response to my standing at the edge of the bank.... wanting to jump, or wanting to want to jump, or charcoal in hand in front of a large white tablet and easel in a figure-drawing class.
Afraid to make the first mark? Or afraid to make a mark?
Afraid of the water? Or the current? Or the cold?
Or afraid of leaving?
I well up with awareness that, gdi, THIS IS STILL A CORE ISSUE WITH ME.
I honor my own penchant for staying, too.
Feathering. Tending. Still if not stillpoint.
THE DANCE is here.
But many dances were out there. And I did not jump.
I did not jump.
Many times. So many times.
And many things, ideas, inventions, activities, friendships, artworks, poems....
drifted by in the current... without me?
(What would PEMA say about THIS? --- if they are only thoughts... and not deeds...
if they are only thoughts, not words.
I turn 53 this week.
Is this my story?
More than "just sayin'"
Book mark that, Martha!
Love it all