Sunday, January 06, 2013
I had an "aha!" moment this week. I actually stopped myself in the middle of a binge before it got out of hand.
I was alone in the house and bored, and I got hungry. I went into the kitchen and started grazing... then I realized I was eating too much and starting to binge. I was trying to talk myself out of eating more, but when I continued to eat, I started feeling guilty, and that made me want to just give up, give in, and keep eating until I was stuffed. I told myself that I could "just start over tomorrow" after I was finished eating everything in the house.
For some reason, I paused, and thought "It is only Jan 3, I haven't tried very hard, and I can't just keep doing this to myself over and over. This stops now."
At that point I decided to get on SparkPeople and entered what I had eaten in my food tracker to asses the damage. I really hadn't eaten all that much. If later i ate a small dinner, I would still be within my calorie goal range. By dinner time, I wasn't even hungry and I had a mug of warm milk and at the end of the day, I was actually a little under my calorie goal.
So I learned a few things:
1. If I am hungry, eat a small meal. Sit down and eat, don't eat at the fridge, and don't feel guilty.
2. If I am alone, hungry and bored...that is my "Danger Zone" and I am likely to binge. Keep busy and don't get too hungry.
3. It's never too late to pause and take inventory during a binge.
4. If I'm not hungry at dinnertime, it's OK to skip dinner.
So I turned a potential binge around! Wow! I am proud of myself!
Wednesday, January 02, 2013
Well it's day 2 and I'm off and running so to speak. My motivation is high and I know I can do this!
I am going to come at my weight loss problem a little differently. I want to stick with it for the rest of my life. So the goal isn't necessarily how many pounds I'll lose but how LONG I have been on track, eating less, and exercising every day. The pounds will come off. Each day is a drop of water that will eventually be an ocean!
I started walking again, and I feel great about it. I quit my gym membership since I wasn't going and the $$ was going down the toilet. I know that I don't need a gym to lose weight, I can walk and do exercise videos at home for free and not waste time and gas driving there and finding a place to park. I need to make exercise something that's easy to fit in my life, not another hassle.
Monday, December 03, 2012
I had a great week, I lost 4 lbs and I am feeling a little better overall. Yey!
I have been really working on paying attention to my body's hunger and fullness cues and how fast I eat. I am used to eating way too fast. I caught myself shoveling another bite in my pie hole before I had swallowed the previous one. Yikes! It's not a contest! No wonder I often feel stuffed after a meal. I am trying to slow wa-a-ay down, taking a sip of water or tea between mouthfuls, and taking mini breaks during eating by putting down the fork and taking a breath, and of course swallowing before I refill.
This week my goal is to walk at least one mile a day, track all of my food, and to continue the slow, mindful eating.
I saw a great mini series on Youtube about obesity and sugar, called "The Skinny on Obesity" I recommend it. Here is a link:
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Well here I am, back again. I have gained (back) 50 lbs in the past year and a half. I feel frustrated, ashamed and angry at myself. I am 9 lbs. shy of my all time heaviest. I can barely tie my shoes, my clothes don't fit, I get winded very easily, I have heartburn, feel tired all of the time, and my blood pressure is up again. I am miserable.
It's time to stand up, brush myself off, and solve this weight problem once and for all. This time I am gong to try to come at this a little differently. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes so I don't repeat them again. I know how to lose weight, it's the sticking with it and maintaining the loss that trips me up. So I'm listing the things that did and didn't work on my last attempt and failure.
Keeping it simple
Allowing all foods in moderation
Exercising a lot
Seeing other's success stories
Eating more vegetables, less starch
What Didn't Work
hating myself for being fat and wanting to eat
beating myself up because I was still fat despite losing weight
being impatient with myself and the whole process
being too strict
obsessing about food
reading diet books
setting my goal weight too low
Writing this down makes me realize that the impatience was probably the worst problem. I would get frustrated that I wasn't at my goal weight faster, then try to be be overly strict, and then rebound and start bingeing. Then after a while, I just gave up.
So I need to work on accepting myself with all of my flaws, and be patient with weight loss. If I stick with it long enough, I will make it happen.
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