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I have trouble letting go

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

I do. I remember stuff and it echoes in my brain, whether I want it to or not. Sometimes I can't get rid of whatever it is - the thoughts, the habits, the pounds. I just have trouble letting go.

I have no advice for myself. I hold onto resentments I don't want, emotions I don't want, habits I don't want, and, definitely, pounds I don't want. I try to empty my mind, put the resentments or emotions in a bubble and watch it float away - and back they are, in my brain.

I need a "pensive" like Dumbledore, where I can literally pull the thought out of my brain and put it in the container, to be brought out later if and when I need it.

But right now, what someone did on Monday is still bugging me. And I can't shake it. I keep trying. I've talked it out, I've thought it out, but I can't get it out. I feel like Lady Macbeth - "out, damned thought, out I say." Only it won't go.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JLPNURSE 12/10/2009 7:02AM

    I hate when that happens! A pensive would be great in real life.

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PHEBESS 12/9/2009 11:03AM

    I keep trying. I think part of it is I feel guilty for not taking part and helping out in an event that someone thought I had agreed to - but I only found out Monday that I was expected to be there, I had not been told of it prior to that, and I have a conflict - so there's no way I can participate.

I'm irritated that I wasn't told ahead of time, I feel like I'm letting the person/organization down, and I feel annoyed that they expected me to do this without being asked.

Just frustrating.

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TRANSMOGRIFIED 12/9/2009 10:54AM

    Have you tried visualizing pulling the thought out of your head and putting it in a jar somewhere? I've done that sometimes, and it helps a little. The best part is, it can stay there, because you'll probably never need that thought again.

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BBUTLER23 12/9/2009 10:51AM

    Hang in there. I feel the same way. There are days I am ready to pack it in and give up. All these negative thoughts in my head take away from the real goal.

Continue to push away these negatives and eventually the positive points in your goal will take over.

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TRANSMOGRIFIED 12/9/2009 10:51AM

    Have you tried visualizing pulling the thought out of your head and putting it in a jar somewhere? I've done that sometimes, and it helps a little. The best part is, it can stay there, because you'll probably never need that thought again.

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It's the little things that make us happy

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

My day is currently wonderful. Did I win a million dollars? No. Did I lose 20 lbs? No. Did a student give me chocolate? No.

What made today wonderful is that:
1. Nothing broke in the kiln (I'm currently doing a bisque firing).
2. The orange and ruby red (almost burgundy) glaze arrived, so we can make the tile we need for the mural.
3. I made it through traffic! (The Oasis of the Seas, the current largest cruise ship in the world, is here today.)
4. My gold Birkenstocks came.

As I said, it's the little things that keep us happy and going!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JLPNURSE 12/9/2009 6:54AM

    I think it's true too. It's the little things that keep our spirits up.

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SAPNA. 12/8/2009 7:44PM

    A day like that would make me happy as well. Anything would be better than the day I have had so far. lol.

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THERESEMB1 12/8/2009 10:06AM

    What an awesome gratitude list, Thank you for reminding me how important they are to make. namaste

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Confession - I am a Harry Potter junkie

Monday, December 07, 2009

One TV channel had a Harry Potter movie marathon this weekend. I watched three on Saturday (after my walk and shopping and synagogue and brunch with DH in the morning) - I was up until midnight watching HP 1, 2, 3. And then Sunday, I watched #4 - again, up until midnight (not so smart with school the next day).

And yes, it was some multiple time of watching them - but each time you see or hear something new, something you didn't see the first time. Plus I swear there were parts that I hadn't seen before, in the theatre or on DVD, that they showed this time.

Plus, seeing them in sequence like that, there were things I caught that didn't make sense. So I had to ask my students - the conversation (which sounds nuts to an outsider) went like this:

Me - "Is anyone in here a Harry Potter expert? I watched all four this weekend, I have a question."

Students - "Channel 24, I watched them too." "Yeah, I watched all Saturday." "Me, me, I know all the stories."

Me - "Okay, in the first one"

Student interrupts - "Chamber of Secrets"

Me - "No, Sorcerer's Stone"

Students - "Oh, right, right"

Me - "So, in the first one, the wand guy, the guy selling wands, he tells Harry he remembers BOTH his mother and father buying their first wands - so it sounds like they both were at Hogwart's, right?"

Students - "Yeah" "Right" "Uh huh"

Me - "But then in #4, Goblet of Fire, in the graveyard, Voldemort calls Harry's mother a dirty muggle - so if she was a sorcerer, at Hogwart's, how can she be a muggle? Or is she of muggle descent? So that she's a mugblood?"

Student - "Yeah, she's of muggle descent. That's what he meant."

Me - "Ah, okay, that's kind of what I figured, but that was a little confusing."

Then everyone went back to glazing their ceramic pieces that they made.

LOL - The students all acted like it was perfectly normal to have this conversation with a 55 yr old teacher! Just cracks me up!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PHEBESS 12/8/2009 9:33AM

    LOL, SF!

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JLPNURSE 12/8/2009 6:55AM

    That's not too bad. My bff who is 40 with kids is a Twilight junkie.

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SECRETFUN 12/7/2009 8:43PM

  I bet the kids were happy to have a conversation on something they cared about, and are trying to figure out how it will end up a school project. You are sneaky that way. :-)

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Tell Obama: No pesticide lobbyist nominees

Sunday, December 06, 2009

I can't believe this!!!!! Read on:

Somehow a top official from CropLife -- the powerful chemical industry trade group that went after Michelle Obama's organic garden -- has been nominated to serve as America's chief agricultural negotiator for international trade. If confirmed by the Senate, Isi Siddiqui, who has spent the last several years of his career fighting various restrictions and bans on environmentally hazardous pesticides, would bring that inappropriately aggressive stance on broadening pesticide use to the White House and influence trade negotiations with Europe and the developing world.

I just signed a petition to ask President Obama to drop the nomination of Isi Siddiqui as chief agricultural negotiator in the Office of the United States Trade Representative. I hope you will, too. Please have a look and take action.


Spreading the happy holiday-ness

Saturday, December 05, 2009

DH and I are members of our synagogue's Social Action Committee - our current project is getting donations and purchasing gifts and items for foster children for the holidays. So DH and I spent about an hour this morning shopping at KMart - he focused on toys for boys (big trucks and stuff) while I focused on things like dolls, stuffed animals, Play Dough - and we both bought big balls that would be great for kickball and other games. We both had so much fun! We also want to get to the bookstore and get some books we think the kids would like.

We took all the stuff to synagogue with us - in two weeks, the committee is having a wrapping party and we'll all wrap up whatever has been collected or bought (I'm shopping with two women from the committee in 10 days).

Then this evening, I got out all of our Chanukah decorations (a bunch of stars that I hang around, a fabric wall hanging I made, dreidls, and our five menorahs, including the one my grandparents brought from Europe when they emigrated) - DH said I'm getting ready too early, but Chanukah is my favorite holiday, and I tend to stretch it out for as long as I can.

So we're doing our part to spread the happiness this holiday season.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JLPNURSE 12/6/2009 6:58PM

    I love when we combine our celebrations with giving to others.

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ILOVEROSES 12/6/2009 9:07AM

    Go ahead and enjoy a long Chanukah!

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PHEBESS 12/5/2009 10:08PM

    And Chanukah is only 6 days away!

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SECRETFUN 12/5/2009 9:57PM

  Never too early to decorate for your favorite holiday! some around here have decorated.

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ROCKYCPA 12/5/2009 9:25PM

    Sounds like you are all ready - Happy Chanukah

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REILLYGIRRRL 12/5/2009 8:32PM

  Wow, you've had a busy day! Happy Chanukah!

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