Monday, July 28, 2008
I wearing size 18 jeans, im finally out of the 20's, in tops and bottoms I ve been in 20 something sized clothing since forever,i think the lasttime i wore a size 18 I was12 or 13.its been about 10 or 11 years, this was one of my main goals, I cant believe I made it!!Im skinnier now then I was in high school,im so happy.My whole image mentally and physically is starting to is starting to change . yesterday my hubby and I bought a basketball to play outside and a real little bike for Jayden.WE never bought those type of things before,because we were never active.I miss my daddy greatly but I know he is proud, of the things we have acomplished, my hubby and I plan on hiking to the top of one of the highest hillsin the catskills and letting some of my fathers ashes free to the wind, (if county law and state law approves of itcourse)
Friday, July 25, 2008
Masala Bhagra dance is a traditonal indian celebration dance Sarina Jain has a series she does on FitTv, im learning how to do it and im enjoying it, i have so much fun its hard to believe im working out as hard as i am till the ache and burn hits later in my muscles.
My son and his cousin join me at home, its a good way to get them tired out for the evening.
Try it ladies if you enjoy dancing and each session burns more than 500 calories.Im really not trying to sound like an infomercial LOL, but i was getting bored with my workouts and I wanted to share something that worked for me.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
After half a week, of doing vacation bible school at my favorite church,I thought I wasnt getting any excercize in at home, boy was i wrong watching a dozen four year olds is a workout.we have gym and we chase the younguns around outside, they love that and i wasnt home to raid the kitchen when the hunger pangs set in so i had to drink water to suffice.
Thank you god for providng this opportunity to enrich these young ones lives, and for them to get me very active to break this mental and physical plateau, I knew I was there to help them but i never knew they will help me in the end!!My sadness and lonlyness is gone unfortunately this schooling only lasts a week.I will miss those precious preschoolers ; (
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
I feel as though my depression is slipping in again...Or I could be feeling the effects of being a stay at home mom, Im starting to feel isolated, and lonely.
Im down to 220 now, but I am starting to loose that zest sometimes. usually when I do my daily walk i do it by myself with the children and I miss having adult companionship, someone to talk to and relate to, all the girls around my age in this area are only interested in drinking and partying, i gave that up when I got Saved a couple years back and started a family .I stand outside of them now because I am literally a 45 year old in a 23 year old body.
Ive grown and they want to be children forever, letting thier parents raise thier kids while they party and goof around almost being a sibling to thier own babies.Once I knew my first baby was in my womb I grew up and stopped being selfish.
They dont like the new mature me, the one who doesnt social drink anymore, I still like to make jokes and still a lil adventerous and mischieveious.I know if i start drinking again ill never stop, because it feels good to get so buzzed you almost forget the pain that life hands you, but then I cause much pain becasue of the things I say and do when im drunk.Its in my blood to be an alcoholic and I dont want that for my children.
Why cant they understand it??Ive lost alot of "friends" due to my new goodie two shoeness, they love the old me, the one who drank to hide sadness and was always happy all the time.
II spend sunday mornings in church while they are overcoming hangovers .Im physically alone now due to my faith in Jesus, and my hunger for the knowledge of the Word.Spiritually no im not alone, god and jesus are there for me.
The best friends I have now that are always there for me are from this site SparkPeople, they understand the struggles and pain ive went through to get healthy, being skinny is not the only end result i want.Being healthy is the main goal.Some days I feel so excited and invigorated other days not as much.
This is just one of those days where im feeling a little down , hey it happens. i wouldnt change my life I love my babies, if it wasnt for them i would be in a Rehab unit somewhere, because that was the only way I knew how to handle stress.Playing with my children is good therapy, they are the whole reason why I wanted to get healthy to begin with, they are my miracles, and i feel so blessed with them.
Saturday, July 05, 2008
i broke my plateau... hurray im 222.2 today after it not moving for a couple of weeks,Im so happy im one step closer to my goal....I thoguht it would be a gain today because I had one extra hot dog last night, but I met my caloric goal exactly, and worked out with my son yesterday to Tae bo,Billy blanks kicked my butt literally LOL, and did a lil belly dancing too.
Without you ladies I would be so discouraged and i probally would of given up on my own god bless all of you, may you prosper in your journey to good health and weight loss.May your journey be filled with wonderful moments, laughs and good friends.
I love you all,
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