PCOH051610   47,511
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PCOH051610's Recent Blog Entries

Leaving a team gracefully

Saturday, December 03, 2011

Hi,

After much deliberation I decided to pull out of the 5% Winter Challenge and in turn leave the Teddy Bear Team. My heart really wasn't into it and I wanted to leave gracefully and to give somebody else a chance. Since the challenge only officially started today I hope I haven't let any of my team down.

Why am I leaving? It is not a decision that I took lightly. I went back and reviewed how I felt on each day of the Fall 5% challenge and realized that I always felt rushed. It was nobody's fault but my own but that is how it made me feel.

I think teams, like SparkFriends, have to be joined and welcomed when you are ready. It is no good to pretend you feel a connection when it simply is not there. I need Spark to work for ME plain and simple.

So farewell my teddy bears! I will be cheering you guys on from the sidelines this challenge and I wish you all the very best.

Susan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LUVMYCRAZYKIDS 12/6/2011 9:30PM

    Sorry to see you leave, but completely understand your viewpoint. I am feeling that way about another challenge I am doing right now...not the 5% Challenge, but a different one. Too many daily tasks to post on and I just feel like I cannot keep up...Best wishes on your journey!


Dawn

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BOVEY63 12/4/2011 9:28PM

    You need to do what is best for you. It is great that you took action when needed. We can all learn from your action in doing what is best for us.

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LALASLAND 12/4/2011 2:24PM

    Susan, I could have written this very same blog a while back when I was on the "A Team"! I loved the friends on the team, but it did the very same thing for me (the challenge pressure, etc.). Sometimes, it's good, sometimes, it's not; and that's all there is to it! Good for you for listening to what is good for YOU! emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 12/4/2011 11:26AM

    I'm proud of you for following through on what your inside voice is saying. I'm sure it was a tough decision. This journey requires us to explore our own inner country. Discovering what works & what doesn't - and that is different things at different times.

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SLIMMERANG 12/4/2011 9:55AM

    You have to go with your gut! Good luck with your Sparking!

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MAMAPOSTIE 12/4/2011 3:37AM

    I'm sorry to see you leave the team, but wish you all the best in the path you do follow. The Teddy Bears will miss you, but SP will still benefit from your encouraging blogs and posts so we can keep in touch. All the best.

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NEWMAC2011 12/4/2011 2:27AM

    I was very sad to see that you left the Winter 5% & the Teddies. I understand your reasons and it's great that you did what you felt was right for you. You certainly haven't let the team down; I wish more people would be like you instead of continuing in the Challenges when they don't participate.

Wishing you continued success on your journey and hoping the timing will be better in the future & you'll return to the Teddies if and when it's right for you. I'll be rooting for you!

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KAYDE53 12/3/2011 11:48PM

    You did what was right for you, and you did it in the nicest way possible!! emoticon emoticon

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CHUBRUB3 12/3/2011 11:20PM

    There is no shame in finding your own path. Everyone here is for a reason...themselves. Do what works for you.
Hugs,
angela


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GLORYANDME 12/3/2011 11:03PM

    I enjoyed so much cheering each other on in the Fall challenge. You will be missed. I am happy for you that you are doing what is best for you. You will always be a tedddy bear! Keep on sparking!
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Comment edited on: 12/3/2011 11:04:23 PM

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CROOKEDLETTER 12/3/2011 10:54PM

    You are doing what you need to do to make things work for you. So kudos to you!

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HEALTHYBARB1 12/3/2011 9:33PM

    Hi Susan...I was your sparkbuddy before we were Teddy Bears together and will continue to be your sparkbuddy after...I so get where you are coming from. I am needing the challenge and support that the Teddy Bear team is made for but you have by great example shown me that there is a season for everything to begin and for everything to end. Your grace and wisdom make me smile!! Just talked to my dd this morning about choosing to follow her own dreams and do what God directs her to do not what everyone else is doing or thinks she should do. We need to apply this truth during all seasons of our life! Take care and have great December!
Hugs Barb emoticon

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BRIGHTPENNY 12/3/2011 9:28PM

    Susan, You have to do what is right for you and you have done that. This journey is about you and self reflection is key to the journey. You have shown that you can do this and do it gracefully. i am proud to be your SP friend!
Jan emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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APIRLRAIN888 12/3/2011 6:01PM

    Agree u did right thing

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_LINDA 12/3/2011 5:46PM

    Good for you Susan! You must do what feels right for you! Please don't give up that sweet photo of you and your teddy, think its so special. I had one Spark friend advise our team that it is ludicrous to belong to more than ten teams at most, and preferably fewer. It is hard to make a comittment to too many. I have only ever done one team challenge, and it was a basic five item thing. I just found its not my thing, and most of the stuff wasn't a challenge to me anyway. I love exercise, drinking water, eating lots of fruits and veggies and I tracked everything religiously so there wasn't much left except the elusive sleep.
Good luck with your healthy journey on your terms!
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SNOWFLAKELILYM9 12/3/2011 5:09PM

    What a gracious, classy, honest and courageous person you are to know what is best for you and do it with graciousness and honesty. I hope you come back to the Teddy Bears someday but if not we are cheering you on still!!!

Margaret

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CERIUSLY 12/3/2011 5:01PM

    Farewell isn't good-bye! Your blog is the second time today I've read about making a connection. I appreciate your wisdom, and especially your honesty. You are right. The 5% challenge is active, and it's a good fit for a lot of people at different times along the journey.

Come back if and when you are ready! In the meantime,we're just a mouse click away.
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GAYLE-G-63 12/3/2011 4:58PM

    Susan,

You did leave with not only grace, but class. There are many people who would leave with no explanation. You truly are a class act.

Huggz,
~Gayle~

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SVELTEWARRIOR 12/3/2011 4:48PM

    I love your honesty. While you will be missed I totally understand what you are saying. You have to do what is right for you. Everyone has to find what works for them. I wish you nothing but the best. Please feel free to contact me if you want to talk. All the best

Mo

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THETURTLEBEAR 12/3/2011 4:47PM

    Good luck Susan! Your Spark friend Teddies are still on our journey with you, regardless of the team connection.
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IMIN2GENES 12/3/2011 4:31PM

    I'm so glad you're being honest and choosing what is right for YOU! You're right, this journey is about you. We'll welcome you back when and if you decide the time is right. Hope this doesn't sound too corny; but I'm proud of you. You have handled yourself with grace and wisdom. I'll be cheering you on all the way! And, you haven't let anyone down.
Chris
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CRAZYDOGLADYBO 12/3/2011 3:47PM

    I think that is a wise decision. This is always about ourselves and none of us are alike. What works for one won't work for another.

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ONEKIDSMOM 12/3/2011 3:13PM

    Every so often, one has to re-prioritize. You have to take care of YOU! That's the primary reason we're all here at Spark... to get healthy. Like PonyFarmer said, "No Guilt!"

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CODEMAULER 12/3/2011 3:13PM

    This is the season where it's VERY easy to over-commit; good for you for recognizing a potential issue before it became unbearable!

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PONYFARMER 12/3/2011 3:04PM

    This is very smart of you. I had to do the very same thing myself about 8 months ago and I was so releaved afterwards. To be honest I do not get people who can belong to 18, 20 and sometimes even more teams.

I struggle with many of the same issues as you. I think it was what drew me to you as a SparkFriend.

When I was in the 2 or 3 teams that I joined, I always felt anxious and I have to be honest here, I did not lose much. Since leaving almost all my teams but 2 and those teams do not require anything of me, they are just there for support when you want it or when someone else may need it, I have lost 24 pounds and plan to lose even more.

I now have a 45 pounds lost with 91 more to go. WooHoo.

So for me, my friend, you are very wise and you are doing what is best for you. DO NOT FEEL GUILTY. I wasted a fair amount of time when I first stopped all of my teams.

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GOOZLEBEAR 12/3/2011 2:57PM

    I'm sure your Teddy Bear team will understand and want what is best for you.

Hugs

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Somebody is praying for us and I want to say thank you

Thursday, December 01, 2011

Hello,

Before any of you get your knickers in a knot, nothing is wrong, we are not in crisis but we just get the feeling that someone, somewhere is praying for us. We are not doing the best financially at the moment but in other areas we are so blessed.

Remember how I won the two prizes last weekend at my staff Christmas party? Well, the luck continued and I won another two prizes at our student - run raffle yesterday! Me! One was another gift certificate to a local restaurant and the other was a nice holiday themed ornament.

Yesterday I got 20 on my first spin and another 20 on the bonus spin.

Things are also going well with my depression. I have been using my light therapy for 30 minutes in the morning about 4 days a week AND I have successfully cut my dose of Celexa to 40 mg down from 60 mg.

I have also been invited by an instructor to accompany her on a business trip to St. John's. The college pays for her gas and hotel room so I am going to get a free trip out of it. I have some money saved up from not eating at Tim Hortons so much which will give me some spending money.

I've finished my 3rd day of weight training and have not quit! And I ran into a store yesterday (Northern Reflections for all you Canadians) and the manager came over and asked how much weight I have lost because she can see a difference.

Yes, I'm proud of myself but most of all I am thankful that someone, somewhere has us in their prayers. Several years ago, when times were better for us, we gave this woman (who was on a disability and who had a son with severe learning disabilities) a lot of our belongings. We were lucky because when we bought this house from my mom she had left it furnished. Anyway, we gave this woman (we have never met) a fridge, microwave, tv, beds, chesterfield, kitchen table, etc and she told the person who delivered it that she would never stop praying for us....so Daphne wherever you are...thank you! And to any of you, thank you as well.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LILORITA 12/15/2011 4:53AM

    emoticon emoticon. You truly are a blessing to others.

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THETURTLEBEAR 12/3/2011 10:51PM

    emoticon

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BOVEY63 12/3/2011 11:39AM

    You are blessed because you are a blessing to others.
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Hope more good keeps coming your way.

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CRAZYDOGLADYBO 12/2/2011 9:59AM

    Wonderful that someone is watching over you!! It is also great that someone outside family notice your weight loss.

Let me say emoticon to weight training!!!! emoticon

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ZIPCONTROL 12/2/2011 4:47AM

  Its nice to feel blessed... revel in it ! make it last !

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JOANNANOW 12/1/2011 10:46PM

    Have fun in St. Johns! You are so sweet that's why you have such good luck. Ya I know it doens't make sense but it feels right so I'm going with it. Sometimes everything seems to be unfolding as it should (to quote the great Desiderata)
May peace and the joy mark the season for you and yours.
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SVELTEWARRIOR 12/1/2011 10:43PM

    Through prayer all things are possible!!!!

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GLORYANDME 12/1/2011 10:42PM

    Love the power of prayer! Thanks for sharing this heartwarming blog! emoticon

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CODEMAULER 12/1/2011 10:09PM

    The power of positive thoughts is not to be taken lightly!!

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CROOKEDLETTER 12/1/2011 10:00PM

    Glad you are feeling blessed despite the financial difficulties. Glad you have stuck with ST for three days (keep it up but remember to have rest days for those muscle fibers to knit back together). Sending grand good wishes your way!

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KAYDE53 12/1/2011 9:32PM

    You would probably be surprised how many of your Spark friends pray for you, Susan. I know I do!! I'm glad that God is providing your needs through these prizes! I'm so glad to read of your depression improvement, and kudos on your commitment to exercise!! emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 12/1/2011 8:39PM

    I missed your last blog, but I'm glad that this week is much sunnier. All those things you're doing to care for yourself are making an impact. Nice that you already have some money from your non-Timmies mornings (so hard to give up!) to spend in St. John's.

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CHUBRUB3 12/1/2011 6:47PM

    You are in my prayers Susan, and I KNOW you are in other friends' as well.
So Great to have a NSV and have other people notice your weight loss.
Hugs,
Angela

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_LINDA 12/1/2011 6:11PM

    I am so glad things are going better for you, this is wonderful to hear..May this lucky trend continue and more good things come your way..
emoticon emoticon

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PONYFARMER 12/1/2011 5:41PM

    God is good!!!!

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KANSASROSE67 12/1/2011 5:06PM

    This blog made me so happy! I'm sending a prayer of thanks up right now!



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APIRLRAIN888 12/1/2011 5:01PM

    Awesome

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GOANNA2 12/1/2011 4:40PM

    I am happy tohear that you are doing so well and that
lady luck is showering you with gifts.
Prayer is a wonderful thing, isn't it? Enjoy your trip.
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LALASLAND 12/1/2011 4:40PM

    Susan! What a wonderful, sweet, and gracious blog! I loved every word of it! So glad that you are filled with this peace that passes understanding! It can only be from the Lord! I am glad you are making ends meet, but boy, it is tough, isn't it, to stay afloat! I hope you have a great rest of your week! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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My funny week!

Monday, November 28, 2011

Hello and Happy Monday to you all,

I just realized that it will be one week tomorrow since I last blogged (where does the time go?) and that blog was about S.A.D. I hope my absence didn't cause any concern and have any of you worrying that the depression was worsening. Guess I really should have written a follow-up blog sooner! Oops!

I've had a good week actually despite my back flaring up several times. Funny thing is I can apparently walk emoticon, dance emoticon and exercise emoticon without any flare ups but getting up out of a chair downright kills me. Go figure. It is quite funny if you think about it and has made me laugh several times this week. Like the day my husband picked me up outside our local mall and when I got into the car the pain struck. I think I caused several shoppers to stop dead in their tracks with the YELP I made and then I had to haul my right leg into the car by grabbing on to my pant's leg. Then there was the small issue of closing the car door. Being the true rednecks that we are, I told John not to get out but to simply reverse the car quickly and then slam on the brakes! Worked like a charm and yet another life lesson gained from shows like "The Dukes of Hazard" emoticon

I exercised every day last week for at least 30 minutes so that was good. My weight went down .8 of a pound which was another plus. Still struggling with the nutrition tracker but I'm NOT giving up. No, siree, I am not giving up as that is the one thing I have yet to master and I am taking it on as a personal challenge.

We had our Christmas social with the college on Saturday night. The tables only seat 8 and it seemed like a lot of people wanted to sit with moi. Go figure. Apparently my husband and I keep people amused with our stories and our antics. emoticon Last year our table was voted the table that everybody wanted to sit with...even though of all of us only one person was drinking alcohol. I think I drank between six to eight glasses of water during the night and was the dancing fool (see, I told you my back only acts up when I sit!).

Oh, and guess who won the prize for the table AND the door prize!?!? ME!!!! You would have laughed at me because the door prize consisted of two bottles of wine, wine glasses, a gift certificate to a nice restaurant, two Christmas movies, a Christmas CD, and more candy and chocolates than one would think possible. So, what did Susan do with the latter - opened it all up and went around table to table and offered it up. And to think my co-workers now think I am so generous when in reality I just wanted it all gone!!!! I had two candies and a handful of cheesies but other than that nothing.

Which brings me to a question I have for all of you. As you probably know times are sort of tough right now with only my part-time salary keeping us going. We've made cutbacks and have notified our families that we would not be exchanging Christmas gifts this year. But we forgot to tell our next door neighbours who always come over to our house on Christmas Eve and we have a small meal together and we have gifts for the couple and their 28 year old daughter. I'm thinking it is kind of late to say "no presents' so what do you think about the policy of re-gifting? I was thinking the wine would make a nice gift for Wayne and Chris and I have a nice cosmetic bag my mom gave me last year (still with tags attached and it did cost $35 !) that I could give their daughter...oh, and Mom is fine with it!. Would that be really cheesy? I really would like to be able to afford gifts for everybody but we can't this year so I've made up my mind about it. What do you all think? I'm sure some of you must be in the same financial situation.

Well, if you are still reading I commend your dedication! We once had a neighbour who fought in World War 1 and he had an expression to let you know if you were talking too much...."Save a slice for tomorrow"

I must take his advice and sign off! Take care and have a wonderful week ahead.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CALGARYNEWF 11/29/2011 6:50PM

    Good call on handing out the candy!!!!Smart!

I would've sat at your table as well!!!Given how much I laugh when reading your blogs, I can only imagine what it would be like to sit at your table and hear your about your antics.

I don't think re-gifting is a bad idea. They sound like great gifts and a great idea.



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ZIPCONTROL 11/29/2011 1:44AM

  You are the life of this party anyway Teddy Bear !! Keep going and all the aches and pain shall move too !

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KAYDE53 11/28/2011 11:48PM

    I agree with everyone else, re-gifting is fine! Thanks for the chuckle with the Dukes of Hazzard trick! Do hope your back gets better though! Good job on your exercising & weight loss too! Way to go! emoticon

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SVELTEWARRIOR 11/28/2011 10:45PM

    I am glad you are doing well. I LOVE the car door manuever!!!!

I thiink the regifting idea is a good one!! Hope your back feels better soon

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HEALTHYBARB1 11/28/2011 5:23PM

    Glad you are doing well!! I think regifting is great idea...just don't give the gift back to the same person who gave it to you or pass it on in their presence...we are cutting way back this year too and with this economy everyone seems to feel the same way in our family or at least understands. Everyone appreciates baked goodies too or a gift certificate for dinner at your home for a quiet after the holidays evening. Take care of you! Hugs Barb

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CHUBRUB3 11/28/2011 4:17PM

    GReat job Susan!
Yes re-gifting is just fine. THe only thing is remember who gave it to you, cause returning it may be tricky.
Hugs,
Angela

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CROOKEDLETTER 11/28/2011 2:34PM

    I agree with everyone else spreading the love by regifting is fine and dandy. Sorry your back has been bothering you. I had a back injury earlier this year and also find that moving is fine, it is sitting for too long that causes problems (or not lifting properly). Glad you had such a great time at the social and that you spread your prizes far and wide and had a grand time dancing.

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EJOY-EVELYN 11/28/2011 1:52PM

    Your Dukes of Hazard maneuver is too funny! Albeit, a bit sad (pardon the pun). No wonder you and your significant other are so popular at parties!

I so believe in regifting! The principle behind it is so practical, I often tell people when they open my gift, they’re welcome to give it away, if they like. Just avoid regifting to the person who gave it to you . . . and yes, after awhile, this can be tricky (when I saved a basket of bath products having forgotten exactly where they came from). Besides, with wine . . . who’s to say that you didn’t love the wine so much that you didn’t go buy another bottle.

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APIRLRAIN888 11/28/2011 1:23PM

    Secret Santa ? One person

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_LINDA 11/28/2011 1:18PM

    Sorry about your back being a bother :( My back never feels better when its moving too. All this sitting and laying around isn't doing much for my diposition.
I agree with regifting. If its brand new and you have never used it and don't need it, why not see if someone else can use it. Great idea really.
I can easily see you being the life of the party. Every time I see your sweet profile photo, I see a fun girl :) It was sad to find out you are dealing with depression..
You will always be a ray of sunshine to me! Enjoy readiing your blogs!

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BOVEY63 11/28/2011 12:43PM

    Just saying, I would want to sit at your table too!
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Handing out the candy was a great idea, and I am all for re-gifting especially when it is something you won't use and due the financial situation your are in. I recently did the same for a recent wedding - with my cut in hours I really couldn't afford to buy a gift. The couple will use the gift and it would have just stayed in the box never being used at my house.

Hope your back feels better real soon.
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LALASLAND 11/28/2011 11:31AM

    Susan, NObody would know it is a re-gift but you. It's a nice, NEW gift to them, and that is all that matters! I think they are perfect, and if you were gifting them to me, I would not care to wonder whether you paid for it or re-gifted it! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JOANNANOW 11/28/2011 11:14AM

    Hi Susan I'm happy to hear that you were not sinking into SAD. I think the gifts sound lovely... don't worry about how they came to you.

I hope your back settles down. Pretty good to be walking and dancing when your back hurts! Hope your back is on the mend.

I had a good chuckle over your Dukes of Hazzard move. LOL emoticon

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GOANNA2 11/28/2011 10:04AM

    Go for it. Times are tough and I have regifted many times
so I don't think there is a problem.
Also I hope you feel better soon.
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THETURTLEBEAR 11/28/2011 9:56AM

    I just read one of the advice columnists yesterday about re-gifting. She said if it's not used or used-looking, and if you are not re-gifting in the same universe (like giving something from a relative to another relative, or a co-worker to another...i.e. situations where you can get "caught") that it's fine and dandy!

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LORENVER 11/28/2011 9:34AM

    Found your blog from the 5% challenge page and thought I'd drop a line.
I think the regifting is a great idea, especially if you don't need or want the items. Kinda like passing the chocolates, spread the love!


Loren

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JLITT62 11/28/2011 8:39AM

    I have absolutely no problem with regifting & those sound like truly lovely gifts.

I know I'd want to be at your table if I were there!

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It's back - My life with Seasonal Affectivedness Disorder

Tuesday, November 22, 2011



Hi,

November and March have always been hard months for me to deal with because along with dliniccal depression I also have another form of depression called Seasonal Affectiveness Disorder. On their own they are hard enough to deal with but when the two unite - well lets just say it can be unpleasant!

So, what am I going to do? Well, I've decided to embrace who I am lumps, bumps and mood disorders. I'm tired of fighting and I am going to welcome S.A.D. into my life just as you would a stranger. But here is the catch - I am making ground rules and have let this little evil friend of depression know that I am stronger now and it won't be so easy to bring me to my knees. I've already given it "the talk".

It went something like this:

I don't like you anymore than you probably don't like me. I am putting up with you because I have to and simply ignoring you won't make you go away. But when you are living under my roof you are going to live by my rules. Yes, you can throw a pity party but it will not be a regular occurrance. Yes, you can make me feel tired but I am not going to eat out of boredom. I will still exercise and if I feel I need a nap, I will take one. I am in control and you are along, well, because I really can't toss you to the wolves....the poor wolves wouldn't want you anymore than I do! I will turn on every light in the house if I have to and I will use my light therapy box. And don't think I'm above telling my SparkFriends about you and your behaviour!!!! emoticon If you get too much for me to handle I will seek help!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MELLYBEANS0919 12/19/2011 5:51PM

    I love this, as somebody with SAD, this blog rocks.

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BRIGHTPENNY 12/3/2011 9:41PM

    Susan, as I was reading your blog, I was saying to myself "light therapy", and then towards the end, there it was. I agree that diet can help but also exercise, so as much as you can, walk those dogs of yours and do what you find is comforting to your spirit. I know you won't hesitate to seek medical help as needed for you have done so in the past, so I won't worry. Take care, my SP friend. Dark times can be fertile ground for personal growth. I'm trying to put a positive spin on your situation: you can gain from this time, it's just not so pleasant while moving through it, as you likely know too well. Life is about just that, personal growth and from that movement within and towards others. i believe you are demonstrating just that. Give me a shout if you need to "talk".
Jan emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 12/3/2011 9:46:11 PM

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ERIKO1908 11/26/2011 2:50PM

    you are awesome!! i love how you took this battle public...now that we all know about it that SAD best be on guard!! hugs & prayers to you...

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KAYDE53 11/23/2011 11:44PM

    My hubby has SAD too!! He has one of those lights and takes vitamin D. Sounds like you're being proactive, and attacking this thing head-on; good for you!!! emoticonWe're here for you too!! emoticon

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HOPEFULANGE 11/23/2011 6:55PM

    Stay strong! Put up lots of christmas lights inside! They always make the dark seem warmer. emoticon

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GLORYANDME 11/23/2011 3:20PM

    Way to let your S.A.D. know who is in charge! Glad you gave it boundaries! You rock! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 11/23/2011 1:40PM

    You've really become so much healthier this past year. You know it's coming & you've developed great strategies to mitigate the damage. This year, I think you'll find is much easier than last year.

Have you thought about ways to combat the depression with food? You want to make sure that you are eating foods high in omega 3 fatty acids, Vit C & Vit B12: flaxseed, olive oil, walnuts, salmon, tuna, eggs, fortified cereals & grains, fresh colourful fruits & veg.

We're here for you. You need extra support, just let us know & you know we'll all come running. Hugs.



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BOVEY63 11/23/2011 12:55PM

    I love your attitude ~ kick that S.A.D. to the curb!
Here's a little sunshine for your day!
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ZIPCONTROL 11/23/2011 9:53AM

  Crookedletter took the words out of my mouth !! Yeah ! Show SAD who the boss is !!

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GOANNA2 11/23/2011 8:13AM

    Susan, you are in control and I'm glad you know
that you are not alone as Lori says. Just keep
telling SAD to take a hike whenever 'he' approaches.
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SVELTEWARRIOR 11/23/2011 1:54AM

    YOU ROCK!!!! Way to control your life!!! I love your strength and determination!!!

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CCCARTER3 11/23/2011 12:22AM

    Susan,I am so proud of you ,you are a strong person.
I have SAD also and I got a therpy light lamp,and I love it and yes if I feel I need to I turn on all my lights in the house.
Stay strong you will win.

CC

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LALASLAND 11/23/2011 12:13AM

    Susan, I am so glad that you know that you are NOT ALONE! emoticon emoticon

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JAMER123 11/22/2011 10:31PM

    Great blog and a great fight you are beginning!! I am a SAD person too. I learned a long time ago that specific lighting can be very beneficial to a brain. I got and OttLite and it is wonderful. I use it for all evening activities, reading, crafts, etc. A Daylite is another good light. Also, Vit. D is the sunshine vitamin and also does wonders for a person. We use sunscreen when we are out in the summer and them in the cold climates, we are indoors a lot so there is little Vit. D absorbed into our systems. I can tell you that I rarely have any problems with SAD any longer. As you are talking yourself out of SAD, you may want to look into either or both of these thoughts. Good luck and thanks for a good blog for discussions.

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_LINDA 11/22/2011 10:13PM

    So sorry you have another weight around your neck :(( But I feel the new Susan is going to beat back these monsters and show them who is boss!
It is a problem we don't get much sun in the winter :(( I have a Spark friend who has SAD and uses a lamp that replaces the light of the sun and she loves the way it works. I was thinking of looking into it as I never see the sun in my dark little north facing apartment and I know that can't be good for me..
You may think I have energy to burn all the time, but it isn't so. By mid afternoon, I could collapse :( I am wondering if this lamp would do something to help my rhythms and aid me in sleeping better too.
All the best, and I will be here for you backing you up when the blues and energy drains hit..
Hugs,
Linda

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APIRLRAIN888 11/22/2011 10:03PM

    Awesome

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CODEMAULER 11/22/2011 7:11PM

    I think this is an empowering blog - review as needed, because your words are saturated with wisdom!!

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JOANNANOW 11/22/2011 7:08PM

    I think that was a good approach. Positive self talk is something you seem to be good at. I have that problem too. We have a full spectrum light in the kitchen so when I work in there I am subjected to the right light. Nov. and March are my worst times too. I just came back from a snowy walk ... the sun shone and hopefully those rays made it to my brain! I am trying not to let SAD interfere with healthy eating ... time to go to the tracker now.... so far so good for today.
We can do this... emoticon

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CROOKEDLETTER 11/22/2011 6:48PM

    You tell SAD who's boss!

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THETURTLEBEAR 11/22/2011 6:37PM

    AWESOME blog Susan!!

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EJOY-EVELYN 11/22/2011 6:11PM

    What a wonderful power you have taken back as your very own. I love your enthusiasm to get rid of the stinkin' thinkin' that can all too often lead us to substance abuse. Stay strong and you'll be the ultimate winner. WooHoo!

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Why I'm happy today~

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Hello!

Well, truth be told I'm happy most days which is kind of odd since I have depression. I think that is why most people I know cannot believe that I have been suicidal in my life but I tell them I'm a really good actress. Anyway, this is not to preach about mental illness nor my acting abilities (or lack thereof!) but to share some good news.

If you've been reading my blogs you know that a) I'm been walking the Newfoundland T'Railway, b) I've been involved in the Fall 5% Challenge and c) I'm slightly crazy....snuck (a Newfoundland term for the past-tense of sneak) that one in just in case you thought this was going to be a dry blog! Oh, and please, don't tell me I shouldn't call myself crazy!!! It is not meant as a slight to my "mental illness" but an acknowledgement that once you accept that deep down we are all slightly mad life really does start to make more sense! emoticon

So, why am I happy? Isn't it obvious - I found Spark, I have made some fantastic SparkFriends, I'm changing my life for the better, I have a wonderful husband, my depression is under control, I have two hilarious dogs, I have a roof over my head, and nobody is shooting at us!

WHAT? You want more?! emoticonWell, lets see, in my virtual walk across our island I'm 3/4 the way there! I don't know the actual km check but it is over 650 under my belt. And, I finished my very first challenge and although I didn't lose the 5% I did lose 9 pounds. I think 10.5 would have been my official 5% but the point is I lost 9 pounds. emoticon

I am trying my hardest now to work on my toughest challenge - to use the nutrition tracker. I have done it faithfully for the past few days and each day I fill in that information it is that much closer to becoming a habit. I might not get my quotas in each day but at least by tracking I can see what areas I need to improve on. So far, I've saved $10 from eating breakfast at home and that money will be my spending money when I go to St. John's shopping in mid-December! That is my incentive not to eat my breakfast out.....I get to take what I would have spent and can reward myself later on with a new piece of clothing or whatever! That was my husband's idea and I think it is great!

Sure hope you are all fine! It is sunny but chilly here today - when I was out for my walk I had to wear my wool hat and mittens but it was sunny!

Susan

P.S. I just tallied my fitness minutes for the 5% Fall Challenge and I managed to get in 3902 minutes since September 24th.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GLORYANDME 11/20/2011 5:15PM

    Thanks for sharing your happiness! I enjoyed participating in
the fall challenge with you. Great job on the 9 pound loss! I agree with you lots of good friends on SP. Its nice we can be there for each other on our weight loss/healthy lifestyle journeys. I'm sure your two hilarious dogs keep you laughing! Prayers and cares! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ZIPCONTROL 11/20/2011 12:51PM

  Happiness.... is .....well..cool !! emoticon

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JOANNANOW 11/20/2011 10:26AM

    You are my inspiration this morning. Your happiness is contagious! Your weight loss is terrific and I'm so happy for you!
I'm sending you some virtual fruit ... hope the real thing starts rolling onto the rock soon. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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APIRLRAIN888 11/19/2011 11:37PM

    Great job

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YIWEN39 11/19/2011 8:26PM

    That's awesome Susan :-) Glad to be a fellow Teddy of such a happy Teddy :-)
See you in winter for more fun and adventure :-)
Eve

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SVELTEWARRIOR 11/19/2011 8:08PM

    Susan you are so inspiring!!!! Awesome job on losing 9 pounds!!

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BOVEY63 11/19/2011 7:49PM

    You are doing so awesome! Stay happy Sweetie!
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LALASLAND 11/19/2011 7:26PM

    Oh, I am so so so so SO happy that you are happy! emoticonI do understand depression (as you well know!), and it is miserable the way it gets a hold and doesn't let go! I firmly believe that our depression has lessened a lot because of the physical activity we do, don't you? I still get depressed (even this week), but I am not taking meds, either. I'll go back on them if it gets unbearable, but I seem to find that fitness keeps the demons at bay enough to have peace of mind.

Love ya! Keep Sparking and keep Smiling! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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IMIN2GENES 11/19/2011 6:53PM

    That's a lot of reasons to be happy! Congrats on your 9 pound loss. That is awesome! Way to go on the trackers... that's been a godsend to me!

Keep up the great work!
Chris

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CROOKEDLETTER 11/19/2011 5:23PM

    Wonderful work. Yay for weight loss, yay for feeling good, yay for being 3/4ths of the way across the island, yay for eating breakfast at home, yay for delightfully smart husband's idea of saving up for a shopping trip.

There's quite a few of us that have a naturally sunny disposition and depression. It is such a strange mix and confuses the heck out of others. Glad you enjoy your happiness.

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CHUBRUB3 11/19/2011 3:36PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
So proud of you Susan! You are doing so well, and we are all crazy in one way or another.
Hugs,
Angela

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EJOY-EVELYN 11/19/2011 3:13PM

    Nine pounds is big WooHoo! That's 36 sticks of butter that you never want to see again.

Less eating out means you will undoubtedly also get a few less processed foods and less sodium. Another big WooHoo . . . as well as the benefit of shopping later as a great reward. Love that hubby of yours for such a great suggestion.

This can be a rough time of year . . . even with family around a level of loneliness can set in. Continue to reach out to those around you who truly care for your well being. You're doing that! WooHoo!

With three great hits (WooHoo's) you're due now for a home run . . . the Winter 5% Challenge! . . . just one more way you can instill healthy habits well into your core being.

You are on fire, girlfriend!

Comment edited on: 11/19/2011 3:14:10 PM

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TEMPEST272002 11/19/2011 2:56PM

    What a great idea with breakfast. My favourite breakfast is oatmeal with a small diced apple & walnuts with just a dash of maple syrup. Can't wait to see what you end up buying with your breakfast money.

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THETURTLEBEAR 11/19/2011 1:22PM

    You're a rock star Susan!!

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