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Thank goodness I'm still walking

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Hi and Happy Sunday to you all!

Very happy to report that my toe is not in pain at all although there is some minor odd sensation in my upper foot when I walk. Not going to let it stop me however as I know if I stop walking now I might be sealing my fate.

I might not be doing much diet wise but I know one thing that I haven't let slip is my new appreciation for walking. You see, walking doesn't require a lot of equipment nor a gym membership. It also doesn't require a lot of prep time or advanced planning. You just have to get off your bum, check the weather, dress appropriately, put on comfortable footwear and off you go. Now, there are things you can do to make your walk more enjoyable but they are just add ons.

I don't like walking in my town (too much traffic and smell of gas) so I walk in the woods. I don't have to and a kilometre is a kilometre regardless where you walk it. I also like to take my dogs and end up laughing at them so much that I don't notice how far I'm gone or how cold I am.

I also break my walks up. The magic of exercise is that it all adds up until at the end of the week you are surprised that you did "how many minutes?". The world should have no problems at all according to all of them I solve when I am walking and thinking about everything and nothing.

On another good front, I'm heading back to work tomorrow and I really am excited. I think just getting up and out of the house is a good thing for me. That, and I love my job! I only work half-time so I really have it made and I know it. The only thing is this is a rough time to be returning as the current semester will be over in several weeks so everybody tends to be a bit edgy this time of the year. Patience is lost, tempers flare, students are overwhelmed, and instructors are burned out. Oh well, that is part of the charm!

Haven't done too much this weekend although I did some more clearing out of my spare upstairs bedroom. I use it for a sewing room as well and I just dug out a quilt I started four years ago! I have it all put together and have about 1/4 of it quilted. It is for my niece Willa in Australia....it was supposed to be a gift to celebrate her birth!!!! Thank goodness I didn't do a baby pattern but one for a child! Ha. Talk about a project taking me a long time to compete! I'd like to finish it and send it to her for her birthday in May so I'm making it a priority.

Oh, I've got something funny to share about my husband and I. We have a wacky relationship and most of my friends think we are hilarious. We just think we are normal and really don't think we are the least bit funny. BUT, we do have our moments.

It started out innocently enough. I was doing an online quiz to see what colour schemes are the real me. There are a whole bunch of images, music, words, etc, that you pick and the computer generates an overall image for you. Well, I was at the part that said, get a good friend to pick the group of words that best describe you. So I sung out to my husband who happened to be washing dishes. (What was I thinking of interrupting him?). Anyway, I called out twice and he comes in the living room and says a) he was busy and b) he couldn't see the computer screen due to the glare. I explained again what I wanted him for and he said, well, let me finish up in the kitchen. The not-thinking part of me pipes up "oh for pete's sake just pick a group so I can get this over and done with" . He then grabs the laptop and says he can't because although he wanted to say select compassionate, sincere and patient, I just ruined it and "impatient, rude and half-crazed" weren't available options. Well, I just about fell out of my chair laughing because he was right!!!! It was just too funny but I guess you sort of had to be here to appreciate how awful I was behaving. Tsk-tsk!

Gotta go as the laundry pile seems to be calling my name. I wish I could train Maddy and Lou to do it but that would be really lazy, now wouldn't it?

Take care you all!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUNEBUGG02 3/28/2011 8:31AM

  Glad you are enjoying walking - that's my favorite too. Although I live in surburban Washington DC, our home backs up to woods and has a trail that runs behind it. That's my favorite place to walk. When it is too wet or cold, I opt for the dreaded elliptical machine in the basement (though it is growing on me). Loved the funny story - humor really helps us on this journey!

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BLUESKY_321 3/28/2011 5:32AM

    Thanks for laugh ... sounds like you've got yourself a good man there! :)
(and glad your toe is ok!)

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GZELLEFRO 3/27/2011 11:02PM

    We are fortunate aren't we and we don't even realize it! I try to remember that when I'm feeling blue. Glad your toe is doing better. You are so right about walking. I should do more of it!

Have a great wek!

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HOPEFULANGE 3/27/2011 10:09PM

    emoticon Too funny about the colour scheme!

Good luck getting back into the swing of things - have fun at work tomorrow!

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/27/2011 9:39PM

    Glad you were able to laugh over your moment of truth. You're right. It was funny.

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KAZINMICH 3/27/2011 7:09PM

    Glad you foot is getting better! Your relationship with your husband sounds a lot like mine! LOL. I also agree with walking in the woods vs. downtown. I love nature and really enjoy it too. :) It sounds like a wonderful weekend!

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KAMAPERRY 3/27/2011 6:30PM

    Happy your toe is ok!

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JHADZHIA 3/27/2011 6:21PM

    So glad you can enjoy walking! It really is best with dogs. We would walk for hours looking for Bendix in the off leash area when he disappeared into the bush chasing after something. He was a very motivating dog :)
Enjoy your work tomorrow, hope its not too stressful!

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TEMPEST272002 3/27/2011 5:38PM

    I'm so glad you're foot isn't hurting. I love walking with dogs too. It's good for the soul as well as the body. I bet you & hubby are hilarious in person! Hope tomorrow goes smoothly.

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CHANGING_LIFE 3/27/2011 4:53PM

    Glad you are walking better. It seems like you feel about walking like I do about running. I think that's how running started for me. I started walking but then began realizing I wanted more and more. I walked because I needed the exercise and I liked the calm it gave me. I know some people never try running, but last year was a time for me to cross over to running when I began realizing that I could hardly get my heart rate up by just walking anymore. It's like that country song: "How do you keep your feet on the ground when you know you were born to fly?"
I'm so glad you are doing well! Have fun at work tomorrow!

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Mrs. Klutz and her toe!

Friday, March 25, 2011


Well, in my normal rush around the house and try to do everything at once frame of mind, I not only suceeded in getting nothing done but I also think I may have broken my baby toe! Yep, I was in the middle of three jobs and I somehow managed to stub my slipper-clad toe into the door frame of my bedroom. I hit with such force that I fell down across the carpet and immediately started to well up with tears (I'm such an emotional girl). Darling hubby who is lying on our bed having a well deserved nap, only wakes up when he hears me crying. How he slept through my 210 pound frame hitting the floor is beyond me but this is the same guy who (on two seperate occassions) slept through trees falling on our house!

Anyway, while I'm there rocking myself back and forth and sort of laughing because of my stupidity all I could think of was "well, I'm not going to the hospital for an x-ray because I just had a pedicure and they will make me remove my toenail polish". At that point, my husband bursts out laughing at me because of my so-called priorities! So there we were on the bedroom floor, me half-laughing and half-crying, my husband trying to look at my foot, when Maddy and Lou race in to see what the "fuss" is all about. Then they raced to their "toy" basket and grabbed toys and shook them in my face to get me to play. So much for being good bedside manners!

So I hope it is not broken. I can't really tell but I don't think it is. Right now it is red and swollen but I can sort of move it a bit. Of course, there is not much to be done for it anyway so I will have to put up with it whatever it is. Just call me Mrs. Klutz!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VICKILYN4 3/27/2011 1:48PM

    Oh my...how that hurts. I have done this before. But I like how the pups were trying to cheer you up and say..it will be okay momma..let's play to take your mind off it. That was so cute. Hope it starts to feel better soon.

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HOPEFULANGE 3/27/2011 7:10AM

    Poor baby toe! I hope he's alright (and still looking ok from that pedicure!) emoticon

Can you walk around?

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KAMAPERRY 3/26/2011 8:38PM

    Oh ouch!!!!! You poor girl! I would have been the same way about the polish!

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JLITT62 3/26/2011 5:13AM

    Nothing more frustrating than stubbing our toes! I once did it against one of my kettlebells, if that makes you feel any better.

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TEMPEST272002 3/25/2011 10:22PM

    Ouch! Take care of that poor toe. You're right about them not doing anything for it, so not really worth a long wait in emergency. I so hope it's not broken & that you'll be walking the dogs again soon!

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ERIKO1908 3/25/2011 9:38PM

    I'm so very impressed with your priorities!! I'm thinking you had to have learned that here on Spark!! Hope your toe gets to getting better soon!!

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/25/2011 9:33PM

    We have several family stories that involved some serious pain that, even years later, are still funny. Your's is funny, too. So glad that the pedicure wans't damaged in any serious way.

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KAZINMICH 3/25/2011 8:04PM

    oh no! my exbf did this. He was racing upstairs trying to outrun us (my daughter and I) and slammed right into the door frame, pinky toe first. I brought him to the hospital cuz his toe was sideways, it freaked me out. They fixed him up. We had a good laugh too.

I really hope it's not broken and heals quickly! He couldn't wear closed shoes for a while..

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DRGOMTI 3/25/2011 7:23PM

    Oh poor Mrs. Klutz! : ( Hope it's not broken! I was hobbling around with a sprained big toe last week. I knew it wasn't broke cz I could wiggle it. I said, this too, shall pass, n it did. all better this week. : )) I wish u good healing!!

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WALKZWDOGZ 3/25/2011 5:33PM

    YIkes! I have to laugh at the dogs trying to cheer you up though. That's so sweet!

A friend broke her little toe when she tripped on a book of carpet samples we had down. OUCH! Those things can hurt. Take care of yourself, & we'll hope it mends soon!

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IBECCA 3/25/2011 4:49PM

    ouch... poor girl

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LESLIES537 3/25/2011 4:48PM

    I hope your toesy feels better!!! OUCH! At least the injury didn't mess up your nail polish! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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If a little is good for you, more may not be so

Thursday, March 24, 2011


Well, it sure doesn't feel like Spring around here but I guess that is such a little think to complain about when there is so much going on in the world around us. When we walked the dogs yesterday it was so windy and cold that I wore the exact same layers as I would have on the coldest day in January! We got out though and that is the main thing.

I'm at a loss of what to write about this morning which kind of strikes me funny because several of my SparkFriends don't blog because they don't know what to say. I'm just letting the brain waves travel down through my head, neck and into my arms and my fingers are busy putting my those tangled thoughts into letters and words for you all to read.

Why do I blog? Because this is how I get the most support! When I click on my comments and read what you guys write back to me it is like you are here in my living room with your pom-poms waving wildly for me. Now, that is truly a funny mental image if you stop and think about it. Ha!

I'm hoping to head back to work this coming Monday as I feel the worse of my wave of depression is behind me this time. I think the best thing I learned as the emotions crashed over my head was to just ride the wave knowing that it will pass. If I fight it too much, I end up going under but if I just relax, and let the riptide take me, well, I'll just write it off as yet another ebb and flow in my life with the black cloud. I told you all about how the anxiety was really getting to me? Well, it turned out the increase in the meds was to blame. So remember if a little is good for you, more may not be so!

Today, my plans are to walk the hounds and me! We do see a lot of people driving in their cars and letting their dogs run alongside as exercise! Can you believe that? First of all, I'd be so afraid of hitting my dogs and second of all, part of the joy of having dogs is sharing the walking time with them. That is why, I also don't wear headphones etc while walking them. I'm on high alert!

Oh, yeah, and after I do the walking and come back here, I really have to tackle some general housecleaning. Our kitchen looks like we haven't tidied it in weeks....seriously! Funny how two grown ups can be so disorganized!

One of my husband's good school friends was involved in an accident yesterday. They usually carpool together but yesterday the young fellow had to see a doctor so he drove himself. Apparently, he struck black ice and then the winds were so bad, the car was just picked up and it flipped over about 7 times ending up 60 feet off the highway buried in snow. The young fellow is fine other than a few bruises but they are all pretty shaken up. That is how easy it can happen. Life...seize it with both hands!

Well, the beasts are getting restless and keep walking back and forth to look at me and then out to the porch. Now, who has who trained?

Talk to you all later!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DRGOMTI 3/25/2011 12:43PM

    Thanx for the reminder n inspiration to get out there n walk the beast! : ))

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VICKILYN4 3/25/2011 11:24AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Shaking my Pom Poms for you! Congrats! Glad you are feeling better. I would also be afraid I would hit the dog if I walked him while I drove. That just isn't smart. Have a great day Susan..you deserve it.

Love ya.

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HOPEFULANGE 3/25/2011 7:46AM

    Sorry to hear about your husband's friend...it's treacherous out there in the winter! Glad he's ok.

As for driving alongside while your dog is running outside...my dad actually used to do that with our dog when we were little. He ended up losing the dog because he shot off into the woods after something and never came back. I remember looking for weeks and weeks for him. emoticon I'd NEVER do that with my dog now. Walking with your dog is a great way to bond!

I hope you're looking forward to getting back to work! emoticon

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/24/2011 9:28PM

    What can I say? Rah rah rah! Siss Boom Bah. You rock.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/24/2011 9:29:00 PM

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BOVEY63 3/24/2011 1:16PM

    So happy to hear that the young man is okay.

Great job on getting out and walking yesterday. I too was wearing my heavy winter jacket for the morning walk and was able to wear the mid-weight one for the lunch hour walk. The thought of driving while letting my dog run sounds too dangerous - not only to the dog but to other drivers who may have to swerve to avoid the dog and wind up in an accident.

Here's a little extra cheering for your day!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KANSASROSE67 3/24/2011 12:22PM

    So glad the accident didn't turn out worse. How scary! Best wishes for a great walk! I'm waving my pom-poms!

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KAMAPERRY 3/24/2011 12:04PM

    Have a great day! I took my dog AND my ferret for a walk last nite emoticon

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REDWEASEL61 3/24/2011 11:58AM

    I always enjoy your blogs! Glad you got your meds straightened out.....I know how that can be a nightmare.....now enjoy your walk!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JEPPINER1 3/24/2011 11:43AM

    Woo hoo! You go girl. Rock on with your bad self! lol

I read a blog the other day that a dog they adopted ran. She accidently let go of the leash and the dog got spooked. She's trying very hard to find her. It was very sad to read. I love animals.

As for us cheering you on. Of course we will! You do the same for us! emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 3/24/2011 10:46AM

    My pom poms are already ready to wave at you! I think it's ridiculous to "walk" the dog with the car!!!! Seriously?! Is that what we've been reduced to? Anyhow, I'm with you. Walking with dogs is one of my greatest pleasures. It's cold & snow here too... but hopefully it will warm up soon. PLEEEEEASE warm up soon! I am so ready for spring, it's not even funny.

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ALISHAB3 3/24/2011 10:09AM

    emoticonI love Pom poms! We are always here to be supportive. emoticon

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    I'm so glad your DH's friend is OK! I can't help but wonder if your husband wasn't protected from injury by not going that day! emoticon

My kitchen looks like a tornado hit! emoticon

And Jazzie, my little puppy sheltie, has already trained me in brand new ways, the little stinker! emoticon

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LESLIES537 3/24/2011 9:43AM

    Thank God your hubby's friend is ok! Sounds like he got lucky! Life is SO unpredictable, isn't it? emoticon

I can't believe people would walk their dogs while driving! Can we say lazy?!! Geesh! emoticon

Enjoy your walk! Us cheerleaders will be here when you get back, waving our pon poms and doing flips! (I always wanted to be a cheerleader, yay!! lol) emoticon emoticon

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JUNEBUGG02 3/24/2011 9:41AM

  Glad you got the meds back to where they need to be. Pom poms waving your way as you and the hounds walk!

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Back to the scene of the accident - old photo - Might be disturbing

Monday, March 21, 2011


Now that I have you all frightened to death, let me assure you that the accident I am talking about occurred two years ago and Maddy is fine now! I am only sharing these photos because I wanted to a) show you miracles do happen, b) the marvelous work our vets did to save Maddy and c) my determination

About two years ago, Maddy chased a van on a snow covered woods road and despite the driver making all attempts to avoid contact, Maddy ended up flattened underneath the front tire. And, when I say, flattened, I do mean flattened. He was on his back when I got to him, and the tire was gone between his hind legs and had just stopped short of his neck. Basically he was spread-eagled with the weight of an industrial van on his stomach. Need I remind you he weighs 10 pounds!

As you can see, he was in very bad shape and it was basically touch and go for several weeks but he needed a lot of care for about four-five months. We took turns and slept on the living room floor with him.....here is a picture of one of John's turns.

As bad as this looks, he made a full recovery and was the very first dog in Newfoundland to be treated with the particular treatment for his back. His fur grew back except for one smallish spot but his bushy tail covers that up!

Anyway, I might be accused to trying to gross you out with the pictures but they are there for a purpose. It was a miracle that saved Maddy's life and a lot of stubbornness (on his part) and work on our part. His wounds oozed so much I washed his bedding several times a day, he had to be medicated (not for pain but to keep him from doing too much), he had to have boiled chicken prepared daily. I took a month off unpaid to stay home with him just to keep him company and we played soothing music for him.

What does this have to do with my current journey? Well, there are a lot of similarities This journey is going to take pure stubbornness and determination on my part and I need to care for my body much the same way we cared for Maddy's. I have to exercise enough to lose weight but not too much to hurt my lower back. I need to prepare homecooked meals and just maybe some soothing music could help me relax.

To help me deal with some of the blame, guilt, etc I have avoided walking on the beautiful road where this accident happened....until this morning! I decided that the time was here to go back to that spot and to take on my inner demons. I felt sad when I passed the spot where impact occurred but overall I felt I had accomplished something. Maddy didn't seem to notice where he was and Lou was just really excited to be outdoors. The road leads to a tree nursery so all along the sides are rows and rows of beautiful pines, etc.

So that was my accomplishment for today....to tackle old fears and move on in yet another direction.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHRISTINA791 3/23/2011 6:18PM

    Poor little guy - he looks like a sweetheart. I'm glad he pulled through all right, and I think you showed a lot of strength in being able to go back to the scene.

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JUNEBUGG02 3/23/2011 3:40PM

  WOW! What an ordeal for all of you. Good dog for fighting the good fight, and you are amazing to be able to take off work to take care of the little fella. What a kind, compassionate person you are.

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JUNEBUGG02 3/23/2011 2:50PM

  WOW! What an ordeal for all of you. Good dog for fighting the good fight, and you are amazing to be able to take off work to take care of the little fella. What a kind, compassionate person you are.

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TEMPEST272002 3/23/2011 9:56AM

    The analogy is a good one. If you put the effort into caring for yourself the way you cared for Maddy, equally amazing changes will occur! I'm so glad Maddy recovered from this awful incident and that you've been able to release the lingering pain by visiting the scene of the accident.

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I don't know who Lou is but I am glad that Maddy is doing so well!

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INFLATED 3/22/2011 1:08PM

    I saw the blog title and had to look. In the middle picture is that the dogs tail?

I am glad you faced your fears. I am one that when I have a near-miss while driving, I keep reliving the moment. My husband outlook is, we didn't get hit and he is unaffected.

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JAVALOVERTOO 3/22/2011 12:15PM

    Wow, great story. So glad Maddy is all better! And I am so proud of you for facing your fears and getting back on your road. You can do this!!!

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JUNEAU2010 3/22/2011 12:05PM

    That's such an inspirational blog! I love the analogy to your journey and the closing where you conquered fear!

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BYEFATNANNY 3/22/2011 11:39AM

    Oh my gosh, I would have been devastated. What a cutey! Good for you getting the "bad" out of your system by taking that walk. You'll have to show us a happy picture of Maddy now.
Best wishes.

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VICKILYN4 3/22/2011 10:59AM

    Good for you Susan. I'm proud of you. Baby steps is what it takes.

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LESLIES537 3/22/2011 10:12AM

    Wow! I'm so very proud of you, Susan!! That was a big accomplishment, I say! Good for you! Maddy is such a trooper :) emoticon

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JLITT62 3/22/2011 8:37AM

    Wow, good for you for tackling that fear - that had to have been very difficult! I can't even imagine such a horrible experience!

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JEPPINER1 3/22/2011 8:24AM

    Wow! That is one tough dog! Good for you for walking the road. That is a big hurdle and you should be very proud.

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MEMARE 3/22/2011 7:11AM

    Susan thanks for sharing Maddy's Miracle. Iím so glad he came through!
I completely understand your dedication to care during his recovery. I did the same for my Nitro Girl when she had her TTA surgery and all the 5AM morning physical therapy sessions so that her leg would heal properly. At times I didnít want to do them but I knew I had to for her betterment; so I did.

I think thatís why Iíve been successful in my own Ďrecoveryí so to speak. It takes that dedication; along with tenacity and the mindset that YES, you are worth it and YES, it takes work to make it happen (but whatís a little work when looking at the big picture?).
Putting that same care and tending into our own lives to get us to goal is what we need to do. You are meeting your demons face on and kicking them to the ground; and getting stronger every day. Itís a beautiful thing.

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HOPEFULANGE 3/22/2011 12:22AM

    What a nightmare! I was actually having flashes of something similar in my head when I was walking Leto today and a truck came pretty dang close to us taking a turn. I'm so sorry that you and Maddy had to go through that.

I'm glad you were able to go back to the spot today. It shows that you are healing and wating to move forward. With all you've been going through lately, that's great to see.

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KAMAPERRY 3/22/2011 12:10AM

    Oh amen!! That poor little baby!!! How awesome the way you took care!! Now apply it to yourself, like you said! emoticon

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GOOZLEBEAR 3/21/2011 11:24PM

    That poor little precious pup. I am so thankful she made it through that terrible ordeal. You did good today by going ahead and making yourself walk that same route and face the demons, fears etc,

You are doing great and thanks for the motivation!


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JHADZHIA 3/21/2011 11:22PM

    I remember when you first wrote about Maddy. He was a precious gift. I am still astonished how that poor little dog could have survived.
Glad you can walk that path again, I hope you are keeping Maddy on a leash at all times as once they have chased cars, they never give that up :( Bendix was lucky twice when he broke free from Angus and ran across the road twice, he was hit, but not hurt once and narrowly missed the other time. He never gave up that strong willpower to chase fur bearing animals (he didn't chase cars), and he was absolutely blind to where he was and where he was going, he just followed where the scent took him.
Well done for overcoming this difficult step!
emoticon emoticon

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BOVEY63 3/21/2011 10:49PM

    Thanks for sharing this story. So happy to hear Maddy has made such a miraculous recovery. He is an inspiration to all of us - showing how determination can get us over the obstacles we face.

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/21/2011 10:25PM

    It's a beautiful story of survival. And it's a beautiful thing whenever we face our fears, no matter how trivial those fears may seem to anyone else. Congratulations on a day well-lived.

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APIRLRAIN888 3/21/2011 9:50PM

    wow amazng thanx for sharing! and yes we need to use same determination \for us!

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ROSES4UN4ME 3/21/2011 9:41PM

    we just a incident in our area that they took this dog was thrown off the back of a pickup going 50 miles a hr.... he was realy bad but he is coming along real good...they ought to do thesame thing to them i hope they caught that idiot....but i am glad your maddy is doing so well good story

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KAZINMICH 3/21/2011 8:46PM

    Amazing, and didn't gross me out! I'm so happy Maddy is well and you were able to overcome this obstacle. Congrats!

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GAYLE-G-63 3/21/2011 8:41PM


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    Oh, I sure did love your story today! I completely understand the trepidation of walking along that same path this long. Since Charlie was killed on our dirt road right in front of our garden, I'm forced to see the blood soaked spot where he was hit by the car. I asked Drex if we could wash out the blood, but he said it would just be too hard since it's been so dry and the road is so hardened. I almost feel like putting up a wreath of flowers there so the neighbors will have to drive around it and the sign attached saying I forgive whoever it was that ran him down and didn't stop to apologize or check on him.

Gosh, I just got all blubbery... I'm sorry! I love the miracle you shared! emoticon

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STACYE13 3/21/2011 8:34PM

    Aw you just about made me cry. My furbaby recently got hit by a car and didn't make it. His was a head injury and there was no way. I'm SO happy that your lil furbaby is still with you :) I sometiems wonder why we, especially as women, have such a hard time taking care of ourselves when we go all out for everyone else. It's like being on an airplane. They tell you to get your own oxygen mask before you get your kids. We all have to learn that it's okay to take care of ourselves. Thank you :)

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FITBARB2 3/21/2011 8:25PM

    Awww I am so glad your little puppy is ok now.... Your fantastic parents. Your right, we need to put that much effort into our own lives .... emoticon

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MYOWNHERO 3/21/2011 8:21PM

    So glad things turned out for little Maddy!

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I'm trying!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Happy Spring to all my Spark Friends in the northern hemisphere! It is another beautiful day here although still a bit nippy at -2 degrees c. at lunch hour. Walked 4.5 km this morning and still needed a wool hat and hood pulled up but it was well worth it. Yesterday we had more snow but it is melting quickly so you know that spring in NL canít be that far away.

Iím feeling much better than I was and Iím proud to say this is day three of anxiety-freedom! Funny thing is, I basically went back to the original dose of my anti-depressants (Celexa and Seroquel), and cut out the Ativan and the sleeping pills. Iím a stubborn olí cuss and Iím sort of making myself keep busy to keep the anxiety at bay.

Iím also on Day three of the Beck Diet solution and so far, Iíve learned several things about myself. I eat like a two-tonne Annie, I eat because Iím afraid of being hungry, and my number one reason for being involved with Spark is so I can feel like Iíve accomplished something. The latter is actually a good thing, by the way!

As of today, Iím back to logging what I eat and Iím going to try to resume the water consumption. I am also going to focus more on meal planning so Iím not making rash, unhealthy, last-minute meal decisions. I KNOW I have to focus more on breakfast and lunch so Iíll be less likely to stuff myself late at night.

Iím going to share with you my silly little ďreminderĒ plan..laugh if you will! I went out and bought fancy sticky notes (ones in different colours and star-shapedÖthat cost an arm and a leg more than regular ones!) and have written encouraging words, little hints, reminders, etc , on them. I have them on the handle of the fridge, on the bathroom mirror, inside my wallet, etc. I also have reminders sent to myself on my cell phone to review my reasons for wanting to change my lifestyle (which is part of the Beck program). I want to put them in the car too but Iím afraid of what Johnís carpool buddies will think when they read ďDonít eat it, fat arseĒ, or ďDonít get constipatedĒ messages stuck on the dashboard!!!! HA!!!!

Oh, one other tidbit to share although you all probably know about this little trick. Despite being the complexion I am, I despise sunscreen especially on my face. It makes my face all white and shiny. I mentioned this to somebody and they gave me a great suggestion. Now, before I go out, I put a blob of sunscreen on my finger tips, tap them together several times, and then tap it on my face. It doesnít rub my face (need, I remind you Iím a redhead and have the red cheeks to prove how sensitive my face is), it doesnít look white and I feel better that Iím doing something good for me. Right now I am using Clinique Solar Smart SPF 50 face cream. Anybody got any other suggestions for facial sunscreens?


P.S. Does anybody notice my not-so-sexy "fit-over" sunglasses on my head? John says I look like an alien when I wear them over my other glasses........

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUNEBUGG02 3/23/2011 4:06PM

  Love the photo and so glad the anxiety is under control. Good for you doing the walking. I'm fair-skinned, also, but not as sensitive as some. I have SPF 15 in my foundation (L'Oreal, I think). Don't know if you are able to wear any foundation, but I think several incorporate sunscreen. I really enjoy your blogs - you express yourself so well!

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VICKILYN4 3/22/2011 10:56AM

    Way to go with the sticky notes. Maybe I should use these. Your photo looks excellent. You're looking good lady. Keep up the good work.

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KAMAPERRY 3/22/2011 12:26AM


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LESLIES537 3/21/2011 2:31PM

    Love the sticky note idea! Just do me a favor and leave the ''fat arse'' part off! Negative self-talk does NOT belong in your vocabulary, young lady! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KAZINMICH 3/21/2011 11:38AM

    Don't worry about the alien sunglasses. They protect your eyes and are comfortable, right?

I have a horrible time with sunscreen on my face too. I think I have rosacea (sp?). If I use anything on my face, I also break out in a really red rash. I've been darker skinned all my life - the last few years is the lightest I have ever been, and growing up we never used sunscreen. I started using it on myself when my Aunt & Uncle both passed (35 & 45 years of age) within 2 years of each other from Melanoma cancer. Scary!! I also break out in horrible pimples from any types of cream on my face. If you find anything that's tolerable, let me know too!!!

Oh, and one more thing - you aren't exactly "Trying" you are "DOING"!!!! And I LOVE the constipation post it, that got a good chuckle out of me - that's definitely something I'd do!!! LOLOL!!!

We had a downpour last night and thunder storms. Spring is definitely making itself known in Michigan! Happy Monday to You!

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JHADZHIA 3/20/2011 9:20PM

    Love your sunny photo, you look great!! Its a good idea that you are putting motivational messages all over to encourage yourself.. It doesn't taste as good as thin feels!
I have sensitive skin too, red head and freckles and lotions irritate it -I am also allergic to aloe vera which is in so many products. I rely on a big hat to keep the sun off my face..You do well to wear those goggles and protect your eyes from the sun. I used to have a pair, not sure what happened to them. I bought prescription sunglasses, but they don't wrap around like that -those are better.
Continue to look after yourself, you are doing fabulous!!
Enjoy your spring!!

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/20/2011 6:34PM

    Hi! Glad to hear that Sring is in the air AND in your step.

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JEPPINER1 3/20/2011 6:14PM

    Wow. Looking good! Glad to hear things are well!

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JLITT62 3/20/2011 4:30PM

    I have post-it's with motivational sayings in several different places - so I don't think your nuts at all! I think it's great.

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TEMPEST272002 3/20/2011 4:07PM

    Hey cutie! I can't see the alien glasses... so you'll just have to post a photo of you wearing them! You know how I like to laugh!

I'm glad your mental health continues to improve. You've done a fantastic job of caring for yourself & that just goes to show how far you've come.

I think the post-it idea is a great one & could be a real conversation-starter for hubby's car pool...especially if you got creative. What about...

-If hunger is not the problem, food is not the solution.

-Little pickers wear big knickers.

-I've come to far to be controlled by a cookie.

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HOPEFULANGE 3/20/2011 3:52PM

    It's great to hear that you're feeling better, and yes spring is in the air! I'm hoping the snow in my driveway will melt rather than having to go out and shovel today...

Love the notes idea! Maybe the one in your car should be more general...like "don't worry, be happy" or something that will remind you about the journey you're on without going into details.

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    You've taken an important step...wanting to be Healthy and Fit
The 'notes' are great...Small steps and determination will lead to...Spark Success!! emoticon emoticon

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BOVEY63 3/20/2011 1:08PM

    So happy to hear that you have been anxiety free!
I love the post-it notes and other reminders idea - I'm going to use that too.
Have a wonderful Sunday!

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    I think you look smashing! (that is a good thing, btw!) emoticon

I take Celexa! I have Atavan, but I haven't taken it in two years. It's in the cupboard just so that I'll know it's there! emoticon

Love you, my Newfie friend! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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