PCOH051610   51,838
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Time off and wondering what to do......

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Hi,

I know many of you viewed my blog title and said to yourselves, what does she mean, "time off and wondering what to do with it, I wish I had some time off"

Well, it is not the simple. When you are physically ill, you are sent home to mend and you usually have some restrictions to your lifestyle. When you live with mental illness, there are no outward symptoms, and you are sent home "to relax". Hmmmm,,. such an easy concept but how does one do it?

It seems like the things we take for granted are so fleeting. I just spend about 30 minutes sitting outdoors in the sunshine.....yes, it was -5 but at least it was sunny and I was dressed for it. I took a cup of coffee out to the patio with me and sat on the warm boards and just watched the dogs chase the birds at the feeders.

I am so sleepy which I am blaming on the increases of the new medications. It will take a week or so for it to build up in my system so right now I'm sort of doing things when I have the energy and sitting back when I don't. Last night I had an energy burst around 10:00 p.m. so I took the dogs for a thirty minute walk.

So, that is where I am right now. I'm doing what I can, when I can. Oh, about my appointment yesterday. I finally confessed to my doctor (through tears, I might add) that I dread having the Pap test done because I am afraid of the knife. He looked at me and said, have you ever seen what we use to gather the sample? I told him I thought it was a single blade knife (why else would I bleed) . Once they showed me the actual tool and told me some relaxation tips, I was a lot better. He also explained that the uterine muscles are not stretched in woman who have never had a baby or have infrequent sex. Well, that helped explain things too. Funny, how we often too afraid to express our concerns, isn't it.

Today, my focus in on breathing and taking one minute as it comes. I might stretch out for a quick nap and then take the beasts out for some more fresh air. Thanks for reading and I will try to catch up with all of you over the week!

Susan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HICKOK-HALEY 3/17/2011 1:53AM

    Oh I hate having those test too. And I have to make my appt. to get my boobs squished. Sure hope the Sun stays out, and gets warmer for you, and that the meds. can taper off after a while. Like you said, just do what you can do, and don't worry about the rest. You will get there, I know it!! emoticon
Jeanne

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KAMAPERRY 3/16/2011 11:25PM

    one step at a time!

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SLIMMERJESSE 3/16/2011 2:04PM

    "What you can, when you can." That is the best we can do and just keep on keeping on. Thank you for the goodie and keep your chin up. Life is tough for many of us right now, and we will get through together. Have a good day.

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TEMPEST272002 3/16/2011 1:37PM

    Doing what you can, as you can is the right thing to do. Walks with the dogs, sitting in sunshine, deep breathing, journalling... all relaxing, healing activiites - just what the doctor ordered. emoticon emoticon

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DRGOMTI 3/16/2011 12:32PM

    Whew! I can't believe it's still -5 there at yer house! It's been warming up here. My hubby is loving it, but I'm dreading the muddy spring to come. Yes, my glass is usually BONE DRY! : )) I'm so glad u got the pap thing cleared up!! I'm never afraid to ask my doc questions. If I ever get to that point, I'll get another doc that I can talk to! I hope your new meds start working soon. But just think, you're still getting out there walking!!! Give yourself a reward for that!!! I'm sure if you keep "taking the beasts for a walk" you'll be feeling better soon!! I know cz when I do my woodsie walk with winders, I feel so much better! emoticon
emoticondr

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KANSASROSE67 3/16/2011 11:45AM

    Thank you so much for the Bear Hug goodie! I think sitting in the sunshine is a wonderful way to spend time. Just keep doing what you can and you will grow in strength and energy every day. Best wishes!

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APIRLRAIN888 3/15/2011 9:44PM

    rest ;p that is what I would do

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S3XYDIVASMOM 3/15/2011 8:27PM

    "I'm doing what I can, when I can." I think that's all anyone can ask of you, at any time. Your time outdoors watching the dogs sounds lovely. I'm glad you got the good information about the pap smear.

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GEORGIAK25 3/15/2011 3:50PM

    These things take time to get over. Yes the medication will make you tired but it is part of the healing process. So you sat outside for awhile even if it was cold. The sunshine would have been so good for your soul.
My DH is going through the same thing at the moment and it is hard for him to do things other than "relax". He is slowly coming good and you will too.

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LESLIES537 3/15/2011 1:57PM

    That's it...one foot in front of the other, just one step at a time. You got this! emoticon

I'm glad you were able to express your concerns about the pap to your doc. Funny how our misconceptions lead to unneeded stress, isn't it. I struggle with that myself. Thanks for setting such a good example for me. I really need to talk to my doc about more than I am!
emoticon

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Going to my family doctor

Monday, March 14, 2011

Hi!

Well, I made up my mind this morning that I have to stop mindlessly eating so much crap. I made up a booklet of coupons to use for the month that will allow me certain "treats" and my husband will do the buying and dishing out. For example, I love salt and vinegar chips so I am allowing myself one big bag a month. If I eat them all in one sitting, I have none for the rest of the month. Same goes for chocolate and the other assorted goodies that seem to be chewed up and swallowed without any thought or even satisfaction.

I had a good breakfast at home this morning. I tried greek yogourt which I jazzed up with strawberries and bananas. I also bought a very healthy bagel and had some peanut butter with it. Made a pot of tea and drank that before heading out with the dogs for our 40 minutes of walking and fresh air. Actually, the fresh air was rather bracing as it was freezing rain.....BUT we did it!

I ordered myself a present from Chapters the other day and it arrived with this morning's mail. I bought the book and workbook, called The Beck Diet Solution which is based on cognitive therapy. I've only browsed through it but it seems to be a great fit with the Spark exercise/nutrition plans. I am very interested in anything to do with psychology (I did my BA in both that and history) so at the very least I have found something to read. I will let you guys know more about it and will give the book my honest opinion.

This afternoon I am having my annual Pap smear....UGH! I HATE it so much. Usually I have to dope myself up to make it through but today I want my doctor to see how I really am. My blood pressure will probably be elevated just at the thoughts but that is all I can do. I am asking him for thyroid testing and fasting blood sugar blood work as they are the two things my other doctor said to check for.

I have my reward picked out for doing this.......I'm worse than a child who needs a lollipop after a trip to the dentist! I am going to buy myself a nice magazine to come home and curl up with. Notice it won't be a food reward!

Really must run now and get a bath before heading out the door! Thank you all for reading!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HOPEFULANGE 3/15/2011 10:10AM

    Wow I love your idea of the treat coupon book! I should use that idea!

I'm super glad to hear that you're back out walking and trying to eat well. Mmm, that bagel and peanut butter sounds so good right now!

I hope your doctor's appointment wasn't too uncomfortable! I had my last p.smear in a mobile clinic, which turned out to be a camper trailer! Ack, talk about weird!!!



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KAMAPERRY 3/14/2011 10:50PM

    Good luck and I love your positivity!

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TEMPEST272002 3/14/2011 9:28PM

    I'm very proud of you for making so many healthy choices in spite of the fact that you are struggling. Well done! I'm really interesting in hearing your review of the book. I hope the doctor's visit goes well.

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DRGOMTI 3/14/2011 9:10PM

    Hope you pass all your tests! : )) I didn't do so well with my fasting blood work a couple months ago. I thought seeing as I lost 20 lbs my cholesterol n blood sugar would be down. But no such luck. my blood sugar was down a little but my cholesterol was up even higher! UGH!! so I wait another 6 months n try again. : )) He's not gonna put me on meds yet. Have to work real hard to lose this next 10 lbs n see if that helps. Oh ya, my pap is due this spring too. emoticon
I love your plan for controlling the mindless eating. I'm sucking on butterscotch candy right now. I'm such a sweets freak. But today was much better than yesterday!! Hope we're on an upward spiral!
emoticon dr

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JUDI_CUTIE 3/14/2011 6:11PM

    I hope your doctor visit went well.

Welcome to the Beck team. I really found the Beck approach to be just what I needed!

I do seem to be stuck at my new weight (which is good news that I didn't gain it back and bad news that I didn't lose any more in a long time. But I am not giving up!)

emoticon

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JLITT62 3/14/2011 4:22PM

    You reminded me I really have to make a doctor's appt - thanks for the reminder. Hope it was less stressful than you expected.

That's a very creative solution to mindless snacking - hope it helps.

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 3/14/2011 3:44PM

    emoticon

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ELISELOVE1 3/14/2011 2:22PM

    emoticon

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BOVEY63 3/14/2011 1:46PM

    Great job on the breakfast and walk!
emoticon
Best of luck at the doc's!


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JEPPINER1 3/14/2011 1:19PM

    Awesome! I hear you on the rewards. I have to get out of the habbit of rewarding myself with food. Good luck with the PAP. I don't know any woman that likes those. Yuck!

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JHADZHIA 3/14/2011 1:10PM

    You have made a great choice for a book. I have been following two people who have been blogging about the Beck chapters one by one and how they are doing with it and it seems to be a very good motivator.
I wish you luck with your exam -I dread that every year too.
Good for you for getting out when the weather is not perfect -too many people use that as an excuse.
Good idea with the treats! I love sea salt and malt vinegar chips too and its hard to eat just a few..
Keep up the great work!

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APIRLRAIN888 3/14/2011 1:01PM

    have "fun" at the docs!

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LESLIES537 3/14/2011 12:59PM

    I hope all goes well! Enjoy your magazine! emoticon

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Just a pile of words tumbling around in my mind.......

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Hi,

Today's blog, unfortunately, will just be a pile of words that have been tumbling around in my mind. I have no gumption to put much thought into what I'm writing and especially not when my mind is racing.

I really would like to thank all of you who commented so lovingly on my last blog. Not one of you condemned my sabotaging efforts but rather gave some insight as to why I was behaving this way.

I did follow some of your advice and have managed a trip to the grocery store and I made it out for several walks with my dogs. The latter was most humiliating as my legs turned to jelly and I was so out of breath that I only managed half of the normal route. At least is was some fresh air.

Tomorrow I am going for my annual checkup. I will get routine blood work done which should point out if the trouble I am having is physically oriented or this the new and improved version of depression.

I am scheduled to return to work in a week's time but that might change if the medication doesn't kick in. It is like I am seeing/feeling everything through a fog which is the most unsettling feeling. I make myself get up each morning as usual and try to keep some routine going but usually just fall in a heap at midday.



This is a recent picture of my brother and his partner. I am including it here and on my Sparkpage because they are really behind my "journey" all the way. Right now I will take all encouragement I can find!

Well, that is about it.

Susan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

S3XYDIVASMOM 3/13/2011 10:38PM

    I think it's commendable that you are still making the effort. I've had a week of slackerism without even the excuse that I've felt out of sorts. I'm hoping the visit to the doctor will be informative.



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KAMAPERRY 3/13/2011 8:03PM

    So glad you have your brother's support!! I am proud of you for that walk!!! You tried, and just increase it little by little and don't overhwhelm your self!! Good luck with the dr! emoticon

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TEMPEST272002 3/13/2011 7:00PM

    I'm glad you're going to the doctor. Please be sure to have them check your thyroid. I thought I was suffering from depression & felt like I was walking under water all the time.

I'm glad you're still blogging. You don't have to make everything shine & be pretty for us. No well-crafted sentences required. We're here to support you!

emoticon

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DRGOMTI 3/13/2011 6:37PM

    Hey! you got out n walked!! Congratulations!! Funny thing, so did I today! : )) n like you, I couldn't do my whole woodsie walk but I managed to get up the 1st hill thru the melting snow n tomorrow I'll go alittle farther. Windy was very happy about it too! Then when I got home I had enough energy to sweep n vacuum the attached garage, n cleaned out Windys toy box. We found her old Kong frisbie, n all kinds of other FUN toys that she hasn't seen for a while!!! Oh boy Oh boy!!! So I get to track a few fitness minutes today! emoticon
Good luck at your appt tomorrow!!! Your meds will kick in more in a few weeks, n then the weather might give us alittle more sun n we'll be on the mend! Hang in there Susan!!
emoticon dr

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JHADZHIA 3/13/2011 2:34PM

    Hope your medication does work.. Glad you were able to at least get out for a bit!
Awesome you have a brother backing you up! You need real life support and those two guys look like they would be lots of fun to be around!
Good luck with your check up tomorrow!

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DDBRENNE 3/13/2011 2:28PM

  This pile of words is good therapy. Keep on taking the journay. It is good to have family with you on it.


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LESLIES537 3/13/2011 2:27PM

    I'm going to have to go back and read the blogs I missed...(I'm sorry!!!) Just want to say I love you.

Hugs,

Leslie
emoticon

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JLITT62 3/13/2011 2:25PM

    Sorry you're still feeling so blah. Hopefully the longer days & spring will help make a difference.

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Why am I doing this to myself?

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Hi!

Happy to report that it is a beautiful sunny day here and that I'm alive and well. Ok, that is the only positive thing I'm going to write about so if you don't want to see the "negative" side of me, please stop reading

Still with me? I don't know what is wrong with me. I know I've been feeling blah the past few weeks but I'm really doing my best to sabotage all of my progress. What scares me is that I know I'm doing it and it is like I really couldn't care less. This is not like me.

I know I've let the nutrition part of my journey get derailed over the past few weeks but I was getting outdoors to walk everyday. Now, this is the second day that I just couldn't be bothered. I even admitted to my husband that I know it would make me feel better but still, they are gone without me and I'm home moping about. I wish somebody, preferably one of my SparkFriends would pop out of my computer screen and smack me up the side of my head. Really, I do!

I've been eating really gross stuff, not drinking my water, not eating breakfast, hardly getting any fruits/vegetables in, etc. I'm aware of this but still I only manage to stuff my face and think about it afterwards.

The ironic part of all this is that my mental state could clearly only improve if my physical state was reborn! I'm thirsty all the time (I used to drink my 8 glasses of water), my skin is dry and tight, I'm practically constipated, my skin is breaking out (from the KING size fruit and nut bars and salt and vinegar chips), I haven't cooked a meal since Sunday.

Has anybody out there ever gone through this? I think I'm a rational human being and although I know I'm doing everything wrong at the moment I can't seem to change. Dear god, am I that stupid? Maybe I'll go outside and knock my own head against the snowbanks to knock some sense into me.

Last night I walked up the stairs from our basement and I was winded and out of breath when I reached the top. My husband was shocked because I don't get out of breath from walking 2-3 km but one set of steps did me in. I am going on Monday to have my yearly checkup done so I will mention this to my doctor but I'm thinking it is the change in medications.

I really don't know and I kind of feel really silly writing this blog.

Hope you are all well and forgive me for being so blasted negative! I really try not to be but I'm mad at myself!


Susan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LESLIES537 3/13/2011 2:35PM

    Yup, been there, done that. I kick myself in the butt for eating so bad and then I go and do it again the next day. Feel like I've totally fallen off the wagon this time. I mope about it, do it again, mope some more...and so on. *sigh*

This is where you let out your feelings...don't you dare apologize for that! It's OK!! emoticon

We'll get through this, one foot in front of the other. Together :)

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KAMAPERRY 3/12/2011 9:31PM

    I am just coming out of it. Try what I am doing, small, attainable goals each day, it does help. emoticon

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DRGOMTI 3/10/2011 10:58PM

    Oh Susan! You are not alone! Both my sister n I are on sp n we're both in a real slump. it's so weird cz seems everything you're going thru, I'm going thru the same thing. My sister always goes thru this slump/depression this time a yr. She doesn't think it's just SAD, she thinks it's just something she goes thru. So, you're not alone n I guess we have to take the bad with the good. All our days aren't gonna be ha ha happy, n if we can just hang in there, the sun will shine on us again. And the fact that you're doing everything you can right now to help yourself is good. I love how honest n open you are! I can really relate to you!! just knowing I'm not going thru this alone gives me hope! This too shall pass!! I'm glad you have some friends that will give you a swift kick, cz how can I kick you when I need a kick myself?!! : )) Your friends are awesome and I love reading their support to you!! Keep your chin up! You're a beautiful person n I love reading your blogs whether they're positive or negative. emoticon
emoticondr

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JHADZHIA 3/10/2011 8:50PM

    So sorry you are blowing it, but perhaps your medicine isn't working and you are depressed. This is a sickness you can't help. That is unfortunately just the way you feel when you no longer care about things... I hope you can get your medicine adjusted or changed so you can get back on track. It will make a huge difference I bet. You said it, this is so not like you..
You don't need a slap, you need help.
We are all here for you, hoping you can feel better soon..
emoticon emoticon

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RIMAJO 3/10/2011 5:31PM

    emoticonYou are loved Susan.. NOT silly, or stupid.. just loved, but struggling. I know you can overcome this & succeed. You know what to do..you've got lots of good feedback here, and good support too. Love & faith. I believe in you.
emoticon

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BTRTHANEVA 3/10/2011 5:15PM

    OK, here comes that slap upside your head... WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU? Is there something that you don't want to face? Why are you going out of your way to make yourself miserable? Are you trying to take the attention away of whatever it is that might be bothering you? How's this all working for you???

Now, go take a long, hot shower, let all your worries flow down the drain with the water, and cleanse yourself. You deserve to treat yourself with tenderlovingkindness and with respect.

Life is too short and fragile for us to be making it any more complicated than it needs to be.

Send with love. Been there, done that...

If I'm totally off base, I apologize. But you asked for that slap, and from all the years as being an enabler to my kids, I realize what I should have done was keep it real.

Because I really care...about you!!!

Take good care of yourself. For you AND your husband.

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PEPSICHIPS 3/10/2011 4:22PM

    Hopefulange
I think everyone goes through spurts like this from time to time. Not sure if this suggestion will work for you or not, but reread your blog and write " TOMORROW, I WILL BE POSITIVE"
TOMORROW I Will EAT HEALTHY etc. Take every neg thing in your blog and make it positive tomorrow. Try it, I bet it will work. Let me know.

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GEORGIAK25 3/10/2011 2:47PM

    Yes I have gone through this and it is hard. Start by drinking your water evenif you have to line the 8 glasses out. Put up notes on the fridge and cupboard doors with questions like
Do I need this or do I want this. Is it good for me or is it not.
I know all about the emotional side of me sabotaging my efforts - I am going through this at the moment. Find a way to calm the emotions. Very hard. but try. I call myself a middleaged menopausal maniac at the moment because even I don't know how I feel. Hormones driving me nuts.

Good luck with gettin back on trqack. You have done well by sharing with us as that is the frist step to getting back on track.

You can do it.

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HOPEFULANGE 3/10/2011 2:17PM

    Just think of how much more fun Maddy and Lou would be if you went for a walk with them! I'm sure they're noticing that you're not out with them! Try to start up again for them, and hopefully along the way you'll start to do it for yourself again!



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JLITT62 3/10/2011 1:59PM

    Can you pick just one healthy habit to start back with? You are too beautiful a person to give up.

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RUNNER12COM 3/10/2011 1:19PM

    Find a little victory and allow yourself to celebrate just that. And then let that springboard you to your next little victory.

One step at a time. That's how you get back.

SDJ

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FATSOO51 3/10/2011 12:42PM

    SMACK!!! Feel that??? emoticon
It probably due to the junk you are eating....sorry, but you asked for it! Now stop that right NOW!!
Getting our brain to think positive is not easy by any stretch of the imagination....but, we have to kick ourselves and try and make the best of what we have.....try to concentrate on the good things in your life...I know you have many, I do to, but sometimes it a struggle. emoticon


Nancy

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APIRLRAIN888 3/10/2011 12:40PM

    I do that too!!!!
so I stick with
lifestyle change= one good decision at a time!
robotly stop and thing, option A or B, A or B
all day long!
tiring but saving me in the long run

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BOVEY63 3/10/2011 12:37PM

    First of all, you are not stupid - we all go through this.
emoticon
I agree that hormones could be the cause of some of this, as well as "spring fever." This winter has hung on so long and there are a lot of us suffering from it. My hope is that when we turn our clocks ahead on Sunday, spring will be sprung!
emoticon emoticon emoticon
And, just in case you still need a hit up side the head, here's one!
emoticon emoticon
I'm giving myself one too - maybe it will help me too.

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JEPPINER1 3/10/2011 12:02PM

    Oh and your not stupid! You are very normal! emoticon

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JEPPINER1 3/10/2011 12:01PM

    I do know exactly how you feel. I even let it go on for few years sometimes not months or weeks. Your best bet, in my opinion of course, is remember why you are doing this, and think of what you did when you started. Go back to baby steps. Start off with walking 10 minutes a day. You may find that you walk the 10 minutes and want to keep going. Drink 4 glasses of water to start and build up again. Treat yourself but once or twice a week instead of every night. Go back to the basics. Everyone plateau's! emoticon

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MOOKBALL 3/10/2011 11:37AM

    You may be pre-menopausal. Hormones can screw up even the best of plans. Check with a doctor.

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What a difference a few days can make

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Hi!

Happy Tuesday everybody and if anybody knows me well, they will know that I really dread Tuesdays for some strange reason. Can't quite wrap my head around that one but I have felt that way about poor, helpless Tuesdays for longer than I can remember! Of course, I'm the weird one that actually likes Mondays!

Anyway, I digress. My blog title today is about my "mental" state. If you've been reading my blogs, you will know that I had a very mild flare up of depression over the past few weeks and I have taken a few weeks off from work to re-focus. After trying to fight its approach, I did what three doctors told me to do (yes, I'm bit of a slow-learner too) and that was to up one of my medications. What a difference 25 mg can make in a matter of four or five days!

Now, it also might have something to do with taking the time off work, or having my husband home this week (spring reading break at his college), or it might all be in my mind. But regardless, I am feeling much better! I'm not looking for answers because I'm too busy appreciating how good I feel.

I also have a light therapy box that I sit in front of on bleak days. I've been using that for the past week and catch up on some fun reading while I sit there for thirty minutes. Again, it could be all in my head but I don't care!

A few of you commented on my new profile picture and your comments blew me away! It was just a shot I took myself and to hear that I look happy and pretty?! Me?! Guys, it is just me. I just had my grays covered up at the hairdresser and the very ends trimmed off my hair but your comments made me laugh. I really don't think I am pretty at all but I do love that my wrinkling ol' eyes are full of mischief! That is the true me...always scheming up funny things to do.

So, how do I claim to be depressed? I often thought I wore a mask so people wouldn't know but now I am actually more open about it. My face is the picture of depression because you never know who suffers from it and who doesn't. I get the weirdest responses when I tell people I suffer from mental illness....a) they laugh out loud because they don't think I'm serious, b) I get to hear "but you look so happy", c) thank you for telling me because I alwayst thought depressed people somehow looked "depressed".



So, now you all have a picture of what I look like. Mental illness is all around us but because it is often invisible, we tend to not "see" it. I'm astonished that I can say this but I'm actually glad I have depression as it has taught me so much. I'm not going to die from it but it makes me humble and definitely makes me appreciate each day as it comes.

Thanks for reading! I am truly honoured to be SparkFriends with all of you!
Susan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAMAPERRY 3/9/2011 12:37AM

    So happy to hear when you are happy!! I also think you are very pretty!! Very warm, and you just "glow" in that picture, I love it! emoticon

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HOPEFULANGE 3/8/2011 7:24PM

    I don't care what you say, you are pretty!!! emoticon

Glad to see you're feeling better and that you're laughing about something!

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RIMAJO 3/8/2011 1:05PM

    emoticonSo glad to hear you're feeling better, whatever the case. If its an improvement - it's all good! Also love the new pic.. how beautiful you are!!

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GAYLE-G-63 3/8/2011 12:20PM

    emoticon

Susan, you're a beautiful person inside and out!

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TEMPEST272002 3/8/2011 11:13AM

    I'm so relieved to hear that you've nipped your depression in the bud. Those of us who suffer from depression know how difficult it is to stop going down that slippery slope. Great job taking care of yourself!

I think you're adorable in your new pic! You have such a friendly, welcoming face. I like the mischievious glint in your eye too! Makes me think we'll have a good laugh when we do finally meet.

Hey, I got your email & will reply soon. I'm just caught up right now time-wise...but I promise I won't leave it too long. Boy - you and I, we're slowing than snailmail! lol


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CHANGING_LIFE 3/8/2011 9:44AM

    Awww! I'm glad you are doing better and doing right by yourself.

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 3/8/2011 9:35AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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VICKILYN4 3/8/2011 9:10AM

    You look FANTASTIC!!! Happy Tuesday day to you and hope the rest of the week just keeps getting better. You deserve it!

emoticonand emoticonin case you need it this week!

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JEPPINER1 3/8/2011 9:06AM

    I have depression because of chemical embalance. I take 200mg of Zoloft daily to keep it in check. It's amazing what a little medicine can do. I would cry hysterically one day and the next goofy and happy. I was an emotional basket case. Good for you having the strength to take more medication and know what you need. There is nothing wrong with it. We all need a little help now and again. Finding tricks to help through things, if it is medicine, reading, letting out a good scream, more power to the person. emoticon

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WJGRIFFIN 3/8/2011 8:59AM

  Happy Tuesday ti you keep up that great attitude.

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