Sunday, March 06, 2011
I'm in a really weird mood today and despite a headache could just laugh about anything. Mind you, I think it is true gift to be able to laugh at oneself or either that, it's a sign you are mentally ill. I think I fit both categories!
First of all, the morning started with Lou deciding to climb over the snow bank and fence in our garden to get closer to the doggies in the garden to our diagonal. This was before 8:00 a.m. and thankfully the others doggies weren't outdoors or else everyone would have been awakened from a sound sleep by moaning and crying dogs. By the time my husband got dressed to go get her, she had walked back over to our garden. Being the BDR (big, dumb retreiver) that she is, she got all excited to see "daddy" in the next garden, jumped back over the fence and scratched her lower belly on the fence pickets! She cried a little bit and let us look at it but it is only a scratch so she if fine. But then she came in and acted all sicky-poo and wanted rubs and hugs. Maddy seeing that Lou is getting all the attention, promptly rolled over to his back demanding the same! I'm telling you there is never a dull moment!
Okay, so we went for our normal walk and when we came home I decided to dig out one of the exericse videos I received for Christmas. The one I chose was Spark's Fit, Fired and Firm. Picture me still dressed in my longjohns (from our walk), trying to do lower body exercises with two curious dogs underfoot! I managed to do the ten minutes twice and then had to pee........that is about when I caught sight of myself in the bathroom mirror.........OMG...... I looked exactly like Camilla Parker Bowles on a bad hair day! Seriously!!!!! My husband, who is nearly bald, claims people pay to have thick hair like mine but I sincerely doubt it....not the way it looks right now.
Anyway, I walked back into the living room still laughing at my attire and my 'do when I noticed my husband had our local community channel on tv. It was a repeat of a gospel concert our local SPCA put off several weeks ago. We knew some of the performers so we watched......again, all was going well until a friend of ours got up and said he was going to sing a duet with the missus "acapulco"!!!! I really think he meant "a cappella" as in without music but I nearly fell to the floor in laughter!!! I don't think he will live that one down....charity or not! Ha!
Oh, in closing I have to add a picture of my cousin's two dogs. This is especially for Tempest272002 as one of the dogs in the picture looks something like what her dog will grow into.
Willow is the black and white one and Maggie is the Husky cross with the mismatched eyes! Maggie will be four tomorrow and was abadoned at 4 weeks old and Willow was the very first dog I was involved with rescuing. She is about 8 years old.
I must go and hop into the shower to see if I can calm down the hair!!!! Hope I made some of you smile!
Saturday, March 05, 2011
Well, it turns out I slept a lot better last night when I increased my medication and stopped taking the sleeping pills.
Woke up totally energized and was out in the fresh air and -10 temperatures before 9:00 a.m. with John, Maddy and Lou. Oh, and heaven forbid, I forget to include Lou's frisbee because she now insists on taking it along on our walks. The frisbee is a red, rubber Kong brand and when she grabs hold of it, the thing bends, turns inside out and looks like a big set of lips! It is too funny! That and she runs up to us and whacks us in leg with it if we don't pretend to chase her!
On this mornings jaunt, they saw a bunny rabbit and all hell broke loose! Maddy was way over his head in snow by the time his paws landed and looked so pathetic. Lou, on the otherhand, somehow thought the bunny was a squirrel and sat under a tree and howled at its branches! That is the thing when you adopt/rescue a dog....no idea if they're slow learners.....Ha!!!!
Came home and had a short nap with my two buddies before we headed back to the same place to walk again. Maddy did his very best to catch a skidoo for us and Lou beat herself out with the silly frisbee. They will certainly sleep well tonight....as will I, hopefully!
Just finished making an apple crisp that I found on Spark......talk about yummy! I resisted the urge to run down to the grocery store to pick up some vanilla ice-cream to have with it but I think it is pretty darned tasty without it. Definitely a keeper recipe!
Here is it just in case you are interested:
3 medium apples, cored and sliced thin (I did not peel my apples)
1 tsp cinnamon
2 TB sugar
2 TB flour
Mix the cinnamon, flour and sugar together. Arrange your apple slices (in a 9 inch baking dish)
and sprinkle the spice mixture in layers between the apples.
In a medium bowl, combine:
1 cup quick oats
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 cup brown sugar
2 TB heart healthy margarine
Place the oat mixture on top of the apples. Bake uncovered at 325 for approximately 30 minutes.
I vary the amount of apples and the amount of sugar because I don't like things too sweet.
This recipe was submitted by BLESSEDW/3
Anyway, I hope you are all doing well and are having a relaxing weekend. I'll try to get in touch with each of you later on in the week!
Friday, March 04, 2011
Before you read any further I want to reassure you all that this blog has nothing whatsover to do with chicken but I figured I would be a good way to make more SparkFriends. I seem to have a good few but I only hear from the regulars (which I am very thankful for) but nobody new seems to read and/or comment. I think that is my way of saying I need to shake things up!
I've been in a funk lately dealing with SAD. I'm really weird in that I suffer the most from it during the spring and actually enjoy winter. I always knew I was a bit different but this is getting out of hand! Just for once I wish I was normal. Nah, I take that back.
I'm going to up my medication tonight and will not take the sleeping pills. The latter is knocking me out way too much to the point where I feel like I am stoned throughout the next day. I took one last evening....about 22 hours ago and I still feel drugged. I spoke to my pharmacist and he thinks the dose is too strong. So, I'm about to follow my doctor's suggestion and up my antidepressant by 25mg for a week to see if I feel any different. Again, I checked this out with my pharmacist and he said I should notice an improvement (if one is to be had) within a week.
Funny thing is I'm not feeling actually depressed but more like anxiety. I am still getting out doors to walk the dogs and I'm not feeling all gloomy like I have in the past. Mental illness is a weird old thing let me tell you.
Maddy (our Pomeranian) had to go to the vet yesterday for his yearly dental and they ended up pulling out three more of his wee little teeth. When we picked him up he could barely stand up and was acting like Keith Richards (stoned) all night and well into today. He seemed hungry so they suggested I give him some chicken and rice (well, it turns out I did mention chicken in my blog) which I cooked from scratch and the little buggar gobbled it all down. Lou put on her best "I'm sick too" face so she was given some of mommy's home cooking along with her DNC....dry nasty crap.....dog food. She was happy not to be left out.
Tonight I am going out with my group of humane society friends to rescue a little kitten. I think we have a home lined up which is really making me feel good. In last night's community newspaper there was an article about a dog in a neighbouring community who walked out on sea ice and was afraid to come back because the water opened up. A woman (a stranger to the dog) saw this, called the fire department, the dog was rescued and the first thing the dog did was walk over to the woman to get a big hug. And people think that animals can't think!!!!
I must go and get out of my pjs....it is supper time and I'm still in them! I'm going to force myself out the door for some fresh air and for a short walk with my canine buddies. Not sure if Maddy is up to it yet so my husband will serve as the car escort!
In closing, thank you for reading. I hope one day to meet some of you face to face to personally thank you for being such a inspiration to me along my journey!
Tuesday, March 01, 2011
We've had another snow storm here overnight so it is nice to see the snow still pure white as opposed to the gray colour it turns as Spring progresses. I didn't get out for my walk in the woods with Maddy and Lou today so we had to make do with walking around our neighbourhood. Managed to walk 3.5 km but it just isn't as enjoyable as being in the woods.
I saw my psychiatrist yesterday for the first time in about 14 months. Actually I did see her one year ago tomorrow at her husband's funeral but that wasn't a professional visit. She has become a good friend of mine and fellow animal lover so we talk about a lot of things besides my mental state.
Yesterday we talked for 2 hours (!) and I left feeling emotionally drained. But that is how I make progress as I tend to over analyze my own situation and she basically tells me that it is perfectly normal to feel that way or explains why I feel that way.
She was amazed that I really enjoyed this winter. I think she thought I was down because the winter was long and a lot of people just get fed up with snow, even those who are not depressed. But this year has been different! This has been the first year in memory that I actually don't want winter to end! Seriously! I just love getting out in the snow with Maddy and Lou and having the cold air and sunny skies on my face.
So she ruled out that as a cause of my anxiety. She knows that I dread Spring (March is not a good month for someone with Seasonal Affectivedness Disorder) and I dread the clock's changing even more.
At the end we narrowed my "warped" thinking to two reasons: One, I have never gone this long without feeling down before and I was probably always wondering when and if it was going to raise its ugly head. Apparently this is quite common as true depression will always ebb and flow throughout your life so you learn to take the good times with a grain of salt because you know they are not going to last. I know that sounds depressing in itself but for me, it gives me a sense of hope that I have finally learned when I'm in a downward spiral and thus I can be prepared.
The other thing, is what we are going to do when and If John has to leave to find employment. Actually John came with me to the appointment so I think he got to hear how concerned I am about this. In Newfoundland it is quite common for workers to fly either off shore or to Alberta for work and return back one week out of four. We've been blessed that we have never had to do that but it might become a reality over the summer when he finishes college. I think even acknowledging the anxiety this was causing helped relieve some of it.
So, my doctor/friend also told me to "increase" my medications when I felt like I was out of sorts and to decrease it when I thought I was okay. Now, I'm not a doctor (nor do I play one on tv...sorry, couldn't resist) but I always thought psychiatric medications were the one drug you really didn't want to be playing around with. I know they always warn you about not stopping them without consulting your doctor first. So, I'm still wary of playing doctor with my medications and I'm going to leave them alone for a week or so to see if I can pull myself out of this hole I seem to be mired in
I know I haven't been very faithful to my nutrition lately so that is one thing I can definitely change with only positive results. I joined a challenge under the Newfoundland Spark team to lose 5 pounds in March so I'm going to make an honest effort with that.
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