PATTYKLAVER   254,291
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It's That Time of Year Again

Monday, October 17, 2011

About this time every year I find myself a little more depressed. It's the time of year my father got sick and passed. It will be 25 years on November 10. Come the middle of October, it always hits me. At least I am aware of what's going on and the reason behind it. But I still find myself struggling to find ways to keep myself busy and upbeat.

My circumstances this year don't seem to want to help. My daughters are not near me. We've been busy and haven't talked as much as we usually do. I am working at a job that I don't like and barely covers one or two small bills each month. I struggle to find ways to make and save money in order to cover the rest of my bills. I'm not really doing much socially and know it would help if I did. I just feel that I am at a crossroad in my life right now and have a lot of decisions to make.

I must put my thinking cap on, put my ideas and thoughts down on paper, and push myself to get out and do things. I want to do things that are different and meaningful. Time to get out the address and phone book and check online. Get myself in gear is the order for the day.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FRANCESLUCAS 10/18/2011 2:17PM

    Girl, I understand how you are feeling! And you can get yourself out of that mood! You know it will pass but you can make it pass faster by getting out there and doing something. I find that when I help others, I forget about all my issues. Money problems are so straining so doing something that will take your mind off that would help!! Good luck to you! Will be praying for you!

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SLIMLILA 10/17/2011 11:26PM

    emoticonSo much on your plate Patty, good that you take the time to write it all down and get some excellent feedback like SpaceyKP gave you. I'm noticing Seasonal Adjustment Disorder (SAD) starting again when we go out at 7:30 and it's pitch black...

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SPACEYKP 10/17/2011 9:51AM

    If you're looking for things that are social and meaningful, you should be able to find plenty of volunteer opportunities online. I remember hearing about a website where you can find all sorts of volunteer opportunities in your area, but I can't think of the name right now. I'll let you know if I do find it!

If you have trouble keeping yourself busy this year, maybe instead of thinking about your dad passing away trying turning your thoughts to all the good things about him. Write in your journal about everything you loved about him. Or you could do something productive to help honor and celebrate his life. It's a little late for planting outside, but maybe you could start some seeds inside and grow a little memorial tree/plant/flower in honor of his memory. Or put a scrapbook or photo album together of all the good times you shared. Something that you can look at that will make you smile and feel happy.

emoticon emoticon

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A Nice Thing Happened

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Yesterday, I got to see my oldest great-niece for the first time in at least 5 or 6 years. It was so nice to see her again and spend some time with her. I also got to spend some quality time with my sister as we waited for my niece and her kids to get there. Family is the most important thing to me.

It was also a nice, quiet day for me. I got a couple things done around the house that I've put off for a few months, like hanging pictures in the extra bedroom and going through some cupboards in the laundry room. The only bummer of the day was the way the Tigers lost to the Texas Rangers. til next year.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUMMARAH 10/16/2011 6:29PM

    I'm trying to get to see my granddaughter. Family means the world to me, too.

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SLIMLILA 10/16/2011 4:37PM

    Glad to hear good things happened for a very nice change... & you got to enjoy time with family.

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SWEETANGO 10/16/2011 11:37AM

    Family time is the best! Sorry about your Tigers loss yesterday. I was watching while they were ahead 2-0, and was hoping for a victory. When I turned off the TV, things got ugly. . .are you counting down the days until spring training already? I know that some of my baseball fan friends are...
Have a great Sunday. Judy

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FITMARY 10/16/2011 9:55AM

    Family makes it worthwhile!!! emoticon

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Good Progress

Friday, October 14, 2011

I felt like yesterday was a good day to get a few things accomplished. Granted, I didn't do everything on my list. But I felt like I put a good dent in it and it felt good. I got a lot of my running around done. I even did a good deed for one of my Avon customers and took her to get her car from the repair shop. She called me after calling 4 or 5 people that she knew that couldn't help her. She had already walked home from work. It really didn't take me out of my way or too much out of my day.

So, today I finish up a couple errands that I didn't get to and spend time cleaning the house up. Then it's back to job searching and practicing my interviewing skills, typing, etc.

At least today I know I won't be getting stressed out watching the Tigers-Rangers game. It's a travel day. I scared my poor grandkitty last night whooping and hollering at the TV. She sat there looking at me with her ears straight up as if to ask me "What are you doing?" Shortly after that, she went into the bedroom and hung out on the bed. I felt kinda bad, but her expression was priceless!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 10/15/2011 11:39PM

    OOOh, poor kitty kat!! I know our dog is not too impressed that we spend all the time with the baby either. Relax and enjoy your weekend!

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MISSLISA1973 10/15/2011 11:59AM

    What a great opportunity to help out someone in need. I can only imagine how much she appreciated it. emoticon

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TOPAZROSE 10/15/2011 7:08AM

    How sweet of you to help out. Our cat sometimes wonders what is going on in our home too! Have a lovely weekend.

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SWEETANGO 10/14/2011 3:07PM

    Kudos on the good deed for your customer!
I hear you about baseball! We are Brewers Fans, so the Arizona-Milwaukee games have been causing a lot of hooting and hollering around our house. Game 5 is tonight...our dog doesn't relax when the game is on.
emoticon
Have a great weekend. Judy

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DIDMIS 10/14/2011 3:07PM

    Ha ha you were really excited weren't. Poor kitty. She thought Halloween had already came

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Can I get a smooth day?

Thursday, October 13, 2011

My stressful day yesterday started the night before. My cat grabbed one of my pills that I had just set down on the counter and got it open somehow. I have no idea if she injested any of it. She was kind of whiny yesterday morning and I worried a little about her, She seemed fine after work, however.

Then, I couldn't get on the internet. The cable company said it sounded like my modem was bad and scheduled an appointment for a technician for this morning between 8 and 10. I woke up this morning and got dressed early to find that I can now get on the internet. Go figure!

I was having trouble getting on internet sites at work yesterday. The passwords that the boss gave me weren't working. Of course, she blamed me and asked me what I was doing wrong. I left to a "I might call you to come in for a little bit tomorrow or Friday." And she commented that she won't be in the office the next couple weeks. The guy that works there may or may not need me to come in for anything he might need done. In other words, it doesn't sound like I'll be getting any hours the next couple weeks.

I spent the rest of last night sorting my Avon order that came in. I now get to deliver it all today as well as all the other things that I really need to get done.

I still am having trouble fitting everything I need to do in my schedule. It doesn't feel like I have any structure to my life at all lately. And I can tell it in the fact that I am finding it hard to control my ADD. I'm not concentrating like I need to and am forgetting to do stuff. I don't like this. It's good that I have a doctor appointment next week. I really need to talk to him about this.

I know that writing things down helps. I know reading my notes helps. Organizing my space helps. I've always written things down. I've been trying to re-do my notes. I'm slowly working on organizing my house. But I feel like I'm taking one step forward and about ten steps backward. Keep forging ahead is what I keep telling myself. I need to take a little time every day and journal. Write my feelings and goals down even for just a few lines. Hoping I can get my act together soon. I feel that I won't get ahead in life if I don't.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 10/14/2011 12:29AM

    Oh Patty,
you are always so busy... I know you could use the money, but I am sure not having to go to that job will be good to level off your stress.
Enjoy your Avon...maybe I should look at doing that again, it's been about 10 years or so, it helped me meet people back when I did it...and I sure could use some friends.

We will be moving at the end of the month... dd is getting a bigger place with a finished basement, so that's the plan for awhile... I don't want to buy a house (aprox. $300k here in AB.) until we have some income - well, actually, can't get a mortgage till then anyway. And it keeps our expenses way down and helps dd too.

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DIDMIS 10/13/2011 9:52PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NPA4LOSS 10/13/2011 12:54PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon I hope that you have a better day today! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/13/2011 12:55:16 PM

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INGMARIE 10/13/2011 11:00AM

    seems to me ,you need some of theese. emoticon emoticon
Take care, things will get better. emoticon

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MIA Today

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

I will be MIA today on the message boards and trying to respond to other people's blogs. It seems that something is wrong with my internet modem. The soonest someone can come out is tomorrow morning between 8am and 10 am. I ran to the library before work because I was having some withdrawals. But, my time is limited if I'm to make it to my "favorite job" on time.

I did go on the job interview with the personnel agency yesterday. I wasn't eligible for the CSR job because I had worked for the company before, but they are putting my resume in for some other positions. And I got to leave my Avon book there and a couple more new places. So the day wasn't a total waste.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 10/12/2011 10:22PM

    Bummer, on losing your connection, hope it's not for long...

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NPA4LOSS 10/12/2011 9:20PM

    See you when you return.

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