Friday, October 07, 2011
I went to work yesterday against my better judgment. I know I should have a better attitude, but I also know that I should let go of people who make me feel bad. I have this sense of "do my best and be committed" that I'm still struggling with. But yesterday sure made a good argument for getting out of Dodge.
The boss was out of town. I was there from 10-4:45. She called - no lie- at least 15 times. She called the other worker to tell me to not answer any of my emails - she already did. She called to ask if we had received an email. She actually had to make three calls before I got it. It had two attachments on it, one of which was empty. She swore she only added one attachment. She called to ask me if I had the form to send the insurance company for the employees that would soon be covered with health, life, eye, dental insurance. She didn't believe me when I said I had it. So, she called back to say she talked to the representative at the company and he would be sending it again. And make sure I save it this time! She called to ask if we got a fax from a company and didn't understand why we didn't know why we didn't.
I barely got my little bit of work done by the time I had to leave for the day. I will probably be criticized for what I did with the insurance papers. (I talked to the insurance guy myself and know I did it the way he wanted me to do it!) I also know she had made a mistake and sent a letter out to someone with the wrong name on it - I don't think I was supposed to overhear that one! I found it very hard to concentrate with all the phone calls. I also found that it was harder to remember how to do things when I don't get a chance to do them very often. Everyone has to stop and think about stuff when they haven't done it in awhile. But she honestly doesn't see it that way. She thinks I lied when I told her all that I had done for other companies. She got a little ticked at me when I told her one day that every company doesn't do things exactly how she does them.
I realize that I'm rambling. But I do find that putting my feelings and thoughts into words on paper helps me sort things in my mind. I do know that I was so exhausted last night that I couldn't really do anything after 8 pm. I was dozing at 9, and I so very much wanted to watch the whole Tigers-Yankees game!
I'm going to spend some time on my Avon job today. And I'm going to apply for as many jobs as I can, along with practicing my job interviewing skills. I'll give myself today to recuperate and think things over. I really expect that my decision will be to tell the boss that I'm not coming back in. My mental health isn't worth the little bit of money that I make and all the stress that this job comes with.
Tuesday, October 04, 2011
I got a bit done yesterday. Not as much as I would have liked, but I did feel like I accomplished something. I tackled the front closet looking for my daughter's Halloween costume box. I took pictures of some of them and put them on Craig's List. I was able to condense a couple boxes. That project was my biggest of the day. I've been putting it off and am glad that I got it done.
I applied for a lot of jobs yesterday and touched base with a few of the employment agencies that I'm registered with. I broke down and practiced my typing again. I'm down a few wpm and know that I need to keep practicing to keep it up. I've got to take time to go through the Microsoft Word and Excel class books that I have. The more skills I have, the better chance of getting a job I have. Speaking of which, I've got to go over my job interviewing questions again. I know this is my major weakness - my lack of confidence shows through a bit. So, I want to spend at least an hour to an hour and a half on all those today.
I stopped at Wal Mart and bought some white paint to do the trim work in the condo. I want to get it done before I put the clear plastic on the windows for the winter and before I have people over for Thanksgiving.
I also have to be realistic. If I don't get another job soon, I won't be able to keep up the payments. This bothers me mostly because it's my daughter's condo and I really don't want to let her down. But...if I can't make the payments, we need to get a renter in here. Fresh paint always helps on the presentation of a place.
So, I've got another day that I hope will be productive. I have to stop at 1:00 and take my sister to her lawyer's office and stop again to have dinner with the family as it's my Mom's 81st birthday. My family always gets on my case because I usually don't eat at restaurants. As we all know, most of the meals just have too many calories and other bad things that I just don't need to be eating. But, I'm always dedicated and determined. I can probably get by with a salad or a piece of grilled chicken. (Of course: the family picked a pizza place.)
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