PATTYKLAVER   254,150
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PATTYKLAVER's Recent Blog Entries

Anxiety Turned into Determination

Saturday, August 04, 2012

My anxiety of Thursday gave me a swift kick that I desperately needed. I woke up yesterday with a renewed determination to get things accomplished and get my life back in the direction that I want it to go.

I spent the afternoon doing some research and found out some things that I needed for my divorce proceedings. It felt good to feel like I accomplished something as I sent the paperwork to the lawyer.

I got the schedule of fall classes for the local community college in the mail yesterday. There are definitely a couple classes that I'd like to take. I just need to get my finances in order so I can register. It would feel good to brush up on things and to make myself more marketable in this lovely economy that we are in.

I am hoping that this renewed determination will continue for awhile. I am making it a goal to have it last at least through the end of the month.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 8/6/2012 4:51PM

    Good to hear you're turning this around to your advantage....My dd told me about an intro class they have at the local rec centre, where you for about $35, you can try 3 different fitness classes 3 or 4 days a week for 3 months...How could I not sign up... Usually it is $46 a mth.... and I have been putting that expense off, but I really do have to figure out what is important to me and then realize I am worth it and do it. I took my client to the gym yesterday and I really enjoyed it, but as usual with my life, things are about to change again, so don't know what for sure or when. Am considering buying an apt. building with dh and have living space and also an income... exploring options.... emoticon emoticon

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BERGBA7 8/5/2012 5:09PM

    YES!

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MELLYBEANS0919 8/5/2012 12:41AM

    emoticon

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NPA4LOSS 8/4/2012 11:20PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LISAM1307 8/4/2012 2:59PM

    Congrats sounds like great plans!

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Anxiety Got the Best of Me

Friday, August 03, 2012

I had a court appointment for my divorce proceedings yesterday morning. My DH had sent papers saying he wouldn't be able to be there. When I showed up, there he sat. It surprised me and caught me off guard. We really didn't say much to each other and the proceeding itself was relatively painless.

I found myself very anxious the rest of the day. It was hard to concentrate on the things that I had to do. I can only attribute it to the way the morning played out. The mediator had reminded us that we really need to talk and try to iron things out on our own. Otherwise, the process will only drag on and cost us more money than need be. Although I knew this was coming for awhile, up until now, I guess I just kept it in the back of my mind. So, it's time to bring it to the forefront and get it over with. We have another court meeting in two months. This time I will be more prepared.

On a good note, I got back on my work website. The schedule for the week after next was posted and I am on the schedule afterall. Here I was thinking next week would be my last week. As much as this job is not my ideal position, at least it is a little money coming in. But I will be spending some more time today online doing some more job hunting. I've had a few interviews this past week and am still waiting to hear from them. The waiting is never fun.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 8/3/2012 11:41AM

    Well, certainly glad it wasn't as bad as it could have been.... Keep us posted on the jobs. I haven't even looked for anything lately..Good luck to you.. emoticon

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RUNNING-LIFE 8/3/2012 11:02AM

    Good luck hunting for a job. I can only imagine what it's like to be going through a divorce being nowhere near that stage of my life yet- but it must'nt be easy. You are in my thoughts!

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SOON2BSMALL1313 8/3/2012 10:18AM

    I'm sorry to hear about your divorce. HUGS it's never an easy thing to have happen even if you are expecting it. Good idea on being more prepared next time. And lastly GOOD LUCK on your job hunt emoticon

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Warning: Stress Ahead

Monday, July 30, 2012

I haven't slept well the past couple nights. It didn't take me long to figure out why. There's a little bit of stress going on in my life this week. It still amazes me how hard stress can be on a person.

The job I have now is a part time, temporary job. The probationary time is coming to a close quickly. There have been a few cashiers that started about the same time as me who have been let go already. I know that higher-ups have been observing me. I don't know if I will be kept on or not. Only time will tell.

I do have two job interviews today. I don't feel that I interview as well as I'd like to. I'm trying to stay as positive as I possibly can and will practice some questions/answers before I go. Knowing that I may very well be out of a job soon makes these interviews all the more nerve-wracking.

I have a Discovery Hearing in front of a judge on Thursday for my divorce proceedings. My DH is supposed to be there, too. I haven't seen or talked to him in over two years and am not really looking forward to seeing him now. He's the type of person who is very self-centered and will easily skew the facts to his advantage. Having a tight budget, I'm really hoping that the judge will be fair and able to see through any untruths he may tell. He may even feel that he doesn't need to show up. He lives out of state and feels that what he does is very important and anything else is secondary. Not knowing how this hearing will go definitely has my nerves stretched.

At least I know that by Thursday afternoon I will have some answers. So, I am taking a few deep breaths and plunging head first into the week. I look forward to a good night's sleep Thursday night.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 7/30/2012 11:04PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

You sure do have a lot of stress, all coming at once of course.... Good luck on the interviews. I got a call today from the interview I had a few weeks ago.. guess what, I didn't get the job... but at least she asked if she could keep my resume on file.... really should have asked her why and for some constructive criticism, but I didn't...

Sleep well, my friend, you need to have your wits about you right now... emoticon emoticon

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BERGBA7 7/30/2012 8:36PM

    Good luck for the interview and on the current job too! Everything will be fine on Thursday, don't worry!
emoticon

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VJH-W65 7/30/2012 11:11AM

    Holding you in my thoughts
most judges have finely tuned bull detectors

You can do this, the sleep is vital to healing.
I try to 'shut down' my brain safely
Starting going to bed habits helped me


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Goals/Schedule

Thursday, July 26, 2012

I haven't really had a set schedule since I started this job in May. I feel that it's starting to take it's toll on me. I've always felt that I do better with some type of schedule in my life. As my work schedule will change from week to week and sometimes day to day, I only have a couple of options here. One is to quit the job all together, which is an option that is not too feasible at this time. Another is to keep doing what I'm doing - try to find another job. It's been a long, difficult journey for me to do this. I have spurts where I have some temporary work, which is great. But it's been awhile since this has happened. I do love having set hours.

About a month ago, I got a notebook out and started writing down some new goals for myself. I haven't added any and have only accomplished a couple of them. This is bothering me, too. I feel that I need to take time out of my day today and work on this. I feel that I will have to really think about this. What do I want to do in my life to improve it? What do I want to look forward to? Decisions........

I did read something this morning that really seems to fit me right now: Sometimes you need to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself of who you are and who you want to be.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FIFIFRIZZLE 7/29/2012 3:35PM

    Patty maybe after you have been doing this job for a while and succeeding at it they will offer you more regular hours. In the meantime, it seems that irregularity is your new routine. I guess you do have the option of being firm about keepng some Me time, say some day or two afternoons that you will decline the offer of extra hours of work. Do you have to work nights? If not maybe your routines could fit not the events to help you t feel more settled?

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NPA4LOSS 7/27/2012 10:30PM

    What a wonderful saying. Enjoy a little R&R when you are able. emoticon

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DIDMIS 7/26/2012 11:23PM

    Patty right on. Take time for you. Rest in the Lord and don't fret.
I have lived by faith for over 50 years and the Lord has not let me down yet.
Irene

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SLIMLILA 7/26/2012 9:21PM

    What a cool comment! I'm on gramma duty this week while dd is away, but then I think it is time for me to do something for ME... Wouldn't that be just the time this job interview will be successful? Did you have your interview yet?

This dating site is probably fake, I can't believe that many different people all have the same goal, and they all have a Masters, but their jobs vary, even with that kind of education? Think I've been had.

I don't have any goals, so I guess I really am just going with the flow or like a ship without a rudder and have to make some decisions. I've really enjoyed most of all not having to get up early and go to work, but as I see the retirement money dwindle, it's going to start getting scarey I think...
Maybe, I will snag a rich sugardaddy....haha! wouldn't know what to do with one if I did.....lol... emoticon emoticon emoticon

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The Weekend

Monday, July 23, 2012

The couple days that I spent camping were exactly what the doctor ordered. I enjoyed myself and totally relaxed. I hated having to come home early on Saturday night, but I had to be at work at 7:45 on Sunday morning. After working a long 9 hour day, it made me miss camping all the more and wishing I can find a new job soon. I do have a couple interviews lined up for this week and next and am hoping they go well.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 7/25/2012 2:00AM

    I hope so too..... Your so deserve a break.... 7;45, Yikes?!?!?!?

Well, I got a call today too for an interview on FRiday for the instructor of medical office reception job I applied to a couple weeks ago... It is M-Th from 8am til3pm, so if I get it, 7:45 will be my time of day again too...

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NPA4LOSS 7/24/2012 7:03PM

    emoticon You will find that job! I am so glad that you were able to enjoy your camping trip! emoticon

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BERGBA7 7/23/2012 4:18PM

    Good luck on your interviews! Camping is just great! Happy to see you enjoyed it.
emoticon emoticon

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