Thursday, December 22, 2011
I hate to admit it, but I've been in a depressed mood lately. People have noticed and commented on it. When I think about why I am this way, I come up with a few reasons. One is my job situation. I've been applying to jobs for at least an hour every day. I've gotten a few interviews, but no job offers. I'm basically a laid back person and don't come across as high-energy. This could very well be hurting me. The lack of money coming in steadily also weighs heavily on me.
Another thing that really bothers me right now is the fact that this will be the first Christmas spent without my girls with me. I miss them so much anyway, and the holiday just seems to make it worse.
So, since I don't like the situation, I have to take hold of it and change it. I'm going to start by reminding myself that companies realistically don't hire during the holidays. I'm going to spend time practicing my job skills and job interviewing techniques. I will still continue to apply for jobs.
I will skype with my daughters more. I will write them good, old fashioned letters. I will make plans to do new things and tell my girls about them. These plans will include getting back in touch with old friends and spending time with family.
I will clean out and organize my house. I will see how creatively I can re-decorate using what I have and maybe finding a few thrift store bargains. Often times, just doing this gets me energized again.
I will call my therapist and get an earlier appointment. I will tell her what's going on and get some concrete suggestions from her on how to help myself.
I will journal every day, reporting to myself on what I've done to improve myself and writing down my feelings. I will set some goals for myself by the end of next week and keep track on my progress in achieving them.
I really hope that my plans help me snap out of this.