Tuesday, November 19, 2013
I was so out of control that I couldn't trust myself to ride through the kitchen on my Hoveround without stopping to snack on something. So I went back to the basics almost 40 years ago when I was an active member of Overeaters Anonymous. I found my original book and started with step one. I am powerless over food and MY LIFE HAS BECOME UNMANAGABLE. It was a big first step to take all over again, what with all my efforts and self-education on food management, nutrition, health, and the like. Now, just a few days into a "relaxed" kind of abstinence from compulsive overeating I feel much more able to manage the circumstances and situations swirling around me at this time. I have a healthy snack if I need it, and have amped up the protein in my meals. That alone can assuage physical hunger, and it's working for me for now. I've seriously invited God into my food journey once again( steps two and three). I've been overweight all my life and each time I come to a new path in this lifelong journey, it makes the long road behind seem so much more worthwhile, and the anticipation of the road ahead so much more interesting . I feel like at this stage I am pulling together all the loose ends of all the plans that have worked for me in the past, with a few new twists and turns to make it new and fresh and exciting. for the opportunity to bring it all together.
Friday, November 15, 2013
After a very stressful week filled with annoying amounts of paperwork, doctor's visits, and the rush -rush of everyday living, I am coming to the end of the week on a positive note. I prayed and God answered prayer. He showed me where I had gone astray with excessive people pleasing to the detriment of my own peace and serenity; He showed me how to put first things first to take care of the important things where necessary; He showed me that I need to take time every day to get quiet and read the proverbs daily which I really enjoy and
seem to help me focus at the start of the day ( I read the Proverb chapter for the date of the present day), and he showed me that I am becoming too hyperactive again and running in circles, so I had better slow down and DO SOME DEEP BREATHING before I wind up with a cardio problem again. So today I worked off my anxiety by cleaning, straightening up and sorting through all the stuff in my kitchen that was in disorder. That was an important start to the holidays to come, and I felt so peaceful when I had accomplished it all. And I wasn't hungry anymore! I always get hungry when I am over-stressed. Doing my kitchen clean-up was like a work-out at a gym...dishes anyone??? I decided that I was taking my DD and grandson out for Thanksgiving since it will be less than a week after my cataract surgery and I don't want to cook or have anyone else messing around in my kitchen. I made a decision to end a 10 year counseling relationship that was forcing me into a co-dependent situation that I have been trying to end for some time now, and I read the 15th chapter of Proverbs with lunch today, and enjoyed both. I have so much to learn from Proverbs that I need to read them over and over because I always forget what I try to remember!!! Haha!
Wednesday, November 06, 2013
I've been taking two steps back for every step forward, and it's making me so tired. Time to go straight and forward again. One of my best friends just reached her all-time weight loss high today, 168 pounds down, and it was such an encouragement to me. Then at a birthday lunch for one of the gals in our Weight Watcher group, this same friend discouraged me from asking the waitress for another round of garlic knots after out delicious Italian meal was finished. I wanted a few more to take home to eat with my left over lunch. But she was right, and I didn't need to add on all those extra calories and fat for the next meal at home. Instead I will saute' a nice bunch of fresh asparagus. Better choice. Sometimes we get blessed with a little prod to our conscience and someone becomes a little angel on our shoulder just when we need her. But wasn't it so nice that she shared her victory with me today by lending encouragement and wisdom just when I needed it most.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
So I'm learning a new lesson: Whenever I think I've reached a pinnacle of success. its
because I've learned the lesson I was supposed to and now it's time to move on to a new chapter in my personal Book of Life. Seems obvious, doesn't it? It should be, but sometimes we tend to think we've got it all together, when all we've done is mastered a new set of trials and problems. Then we're supposed to take those experiences on to write a new chapter in that book. It took me a lifetime to learn how to have the confidence to speak up for myself and make my needs known. So then I got so good at it that I began to think I could handle almost anything that came my way and could speak out whenever necessary. Now that I know I can do that, I began to discover that sometimes I was putting my foot in my mouth (We overeaters will eat anything if we're hungry, right??) and have begun to learn that sometimes it's just better to bite my tongue (doesn't taste so good, but neither does my foot). Last week I was a little miffed because my weight watcher leader didn't choose me as one of the successful members of the group, and I told you guys all about that, and I got over it, forgave and forgot. But I was curious as to how I was going to feel upon returning to the WW meeting today, and surprised myself by not volunteering when she asked for another member to take the seat of a missing member. I think it was by the grace of God that I refrained from raising my hand, but someone else FINALLY volunteered (yes, I had to sit for a few minutes of not responding and that felt weird!!) but someone else finally went forward and I really enjoyed just sitting back and listening for a change. It seems I'm a born teacher and it's hard to just sit back, but today I was so glad I did. At the end of the meeting I did offer a viewpoint, but I haven't quite mastered the new listen and learn lesson yet, so my hand still just goes up if there's a silence in the room; God forbid! lol
Friday, October 25, 2013
Just when I could finally SEE my weight loss, the scale went up 1.4 pounds. It's okay though because I look the same and feel the same as before I got on the scale. Little things like a pound up don't get to me the way they used to, and that's a good thing. Getting passed over by the leader of the group when she was asking the "successful members" to give a talk next week, was a little harder to take, but as with the pound up, this too shall pass, and i'm still as successful whether or not she asks me to sit on her panel. I know how hard I've worked to accomplish this weight loss, and my friends do, and most of all, God does. So I'm very grateful today for all my blessings and the few rain drops that fall along my path will quickly fade away. For today, I have so many blessing to count, that there's no time to sweat the small stuff. Thank you Lord.
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