Monday, April 18, 2011
Day 7 assignment - 30min
Goal - to get in 1.5 miles in that 30 min
Action - Did Two minutes at 2.7, then increased my incline to 2 and a 3.0 for Two minutes. Left the incline at a 2 for the rest of my workout but upped the speed to 3.3mph. I did that for 28 min, sometimes upping it to 3.5!!! I'm getting STRONGER!
I did a mile in 18:52 YAY, my goal was to do it in 20min.
Total Workout - 32 min (last two were a cool down) Miles - 1.7
Short Term Goal:
My baby brother is graduating from ASU in May with his Law Degree AND Masters in Business. Our Dad died 9 years ago from ALS and my mom is in S. Africa serving a mission for a church. My brother's wife's family is attending the graduation but it's really important to me that my brother has people from his own family there. Also his first baby was born in February and I haven't been able to see him yet.
I REALLY want to go AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO GO!!!!! Why? Because I'm fat, not just fat...MORBIDLY OBESE!!! My brother and his wife are GORGEOUS, I'm talking model Gorgeous! Then I have another brother who is coming with his wife and once again...they are good looking with VERY fit bodies. I know my brothers and their wives will be thrilled to see me, that they don't love me any less but I love myself less and there lies the problem.
Yes, I have let many aspects of life pass me by because I've been afraid of being judged, of being embarrassed, of not being able to fit and so much more.
The last time I went on an airplane I had to ask for a seatbelt extension. I'm dreading that!!! I set the goal to be 299 before I leave in 24 days but that goal was set before I had this awful eating days (Yes, I didn't openly admit to more than just that one day. Yesterday was NOT on plan).
My goal is a loss of 3lbs a week. I'm going to up that bit before my trip so I can try to make my 299 goal. Weigh-in is tomorrow. I'm a little nervous to see the number. I'm really hoping it will show a number lower than last week! I've decided I need to UP my workouts to get the results I want for my 24-day goal!
P.S. Besides my 32 min workout I also walked my kids to school. That was a 15 min walk walked at a rate of 3.5mph.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Okay, I didn't literally slip but I MAJORLY SLIPPED on my weight loss program!!!! I was just going to keep it a secret and not share anything about it here on SP but I have to keep it REAL!
I'm hoping to be one of the many people I admire here who can post that they've lost 100+ lbs. When I find people like that I peruse their blogs to get ideas, inspiration and just a little pick-me-up. I want to keep a blog not for my own personal journey but for a resource, in a year or so, for others who are where I am now. So to do that I have to write everything, the good, the bad and the UGLY!
Last night was UGLY! So my husband is out of town which puts me as a single parent right now. The kids have no school today so yesterday felt like a Friday night. My 12-year-old has been eating healthy and has the goal to lose 1lb a week. I didn't feel like cooking last night so I let her choose where we were going to purchase our dinner. She chose McDonald's. Together we sat down and looked at all the nutritional facts before setting out to get it. I knew what my nutritional facts were here on SP and how much wiggle room I had to stay within the guidelines. Unfortunately I had A LOT of wiggle room. My daughter and I each got a salad and a small fry. (still didn't put me over on any of my numbers). We checked out the nutritional facts for the meal my 16 yo son ordered....1500 calories! Good thing he's an athlete and probably burns that in one workout!
Even though I ordered a salad I'm feeling bloated, the spiciness of it along with the salt on the fries was too much!! I'm learning that about myself. Even before I started eating healthy I rarely added salt to things.
Anyway, after that meal I was going to be done for the night. WRONG! I don't know if it was all the carbs in the fries or just the fact that I went off plan but I wanted MORE!!! And the craving, DESIRE hit me strong! Unfortunately my 12 yo daughter, my healthy eating buddy, left to hang out with a friend or I would NEVER have done what I did. I didn't want to be a bad example to her.
My older kids were taking the car for the night so I told them I had to go get gas in the car. Well the closest gas station is connected to a Safeway. We needed milk and eggs so I used it as an excuse to go in and buy my dear old friend that I haven't seen in two weeks....PEANUT M&M's!!!!!! Unfortunately I also bought their YUMMY cookies and a box of Mike and Ikes. As I climbed into my car I could feel my hands shaking, I couldn't get to the cookies fast enough. I chowed down an oatmeal, raisin, cranberry cookie faster than I could blink. I felt bad, but not bad enough to stop.
When I got home it ended up just being me and the three youngest home. We put in the movie Tangled, I had never seen it. In the process of setting things up I ate ANOTHER cookie, then a THIRD!!!!! Half-way through the movie I opened up the Mike and Ikes and we divided them up four ways. After putting my kids to bed I was going to snuggle in mine with a good book and my M&M's. That was my daily routine just two weeks ago. But after the movie I was feeling SOOO bad both physically and emotionally. I knew I couldn't take back what I had already eatten but I wasn't going to make it worse.
Here I am, the morning after, feeling AWFUL! My stomach hurts and the scale was scary (thank goodness it isn't my day to log in my weight).
That wonderful yellow bag of delicious goodness (or fatness) is or was sitting in my pantry this morning. Today is garbage day and in front of my kids I took out the bag and put it into the black can that is waiting at the curb. A few of my kids were freaking out because it was a waste of money to throw it away. A few of them wanted them if I didn't but I told them we already enjoyed cookies last night and a little bit of movie treats and NONE of us needed anymore of that junk in our body.
So, there it is, the ugly, the bad and the GOOD!
And a HUGE yell out to TUBLADY! I read a comment she wrote on yesterday's blog post. I hadn't "met" her yet so I traveled to her Spark Page. I'm so glad I did! Her amazing story and results were one of the things that helped me walk away from doing further damage! THANK YOU!
Update***********I wasn't planning on working out today but DID!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
So since I'm just starting on my weight loss I know the weight will come off at first without killing myself. I decided 3lbs a week is a good reasonable healthy amount to lose. As long as I was eating healthy, following my 3days a week workout and losing the 3lbs I was fine.
Well, today I decided to add a fourth day of workouts in, just a 20min mile. My DD did a workout on the treadmill and then graciously took over again (what am I going to do when she gets a full-time job?) and I went out to the treadmill.
I watched part of another episode of "I used to be Fat". I knew I could do a 3mph workout because that's what I have been doing. Today, for some reason, it was really hard!!! But I worked through it, lowering it to 2.7 at times to get a bit of a breather and then upping it to 3.3 to make up the difference.
As I stopped my workout I selected the display option that shows ALL of the stats so I could chart down my calories burned, distance, time etc.... As I was looking over the numbers I saw that incline was set at a 5.5 WHAT?!?!!!! Since I'm just starting out I always do my incline at a 0. Did I really just exercise for 20 minutes at that incline? I went back inside the house and asked my daughter, "when you worked out did you set the incline to 5.5?" She had!
Wow, that was a realization to me. My body can do more than I'm asking it to do. I know the real changes and results will happen only when I push out of my comfort zone and really challenge myself.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
I did it! I put my brain to work and figured out a way to get the assigned 1.75 miles in today!
My oldest daughter came home Friday from finishing her first year of college (I know, EARLY! Love it!) It's been an adjustment for her. She's gone from being independent with lots of other young adults to being home with her 6 younger siblings plus 2 daycare kids. There's lots of screaming, crying, running around, cheerful yells and MESSES. I'm trying real hard to let her live her own life and set up her own schedule.
The only way I could see I would be able to fit my walk in today was to ask her to watch the three little ones (mine age 3 and the daycare, ages 2 and 10 months). I hesitated a bit because it's my obligation not her's and the little one has been quite fussy today. Well, like I always tell my kids, "What's the worse that can happen by asking?" So I did it and she said YES, she was glad to help me stay on top of my goals.
Once again, 1.75 miles might not seem like it should take a long time. It might take someone else 15 minutes to do but I knew it would probably take me around 40 (that's a good chunk of time in my reality but I'm going to have to CHANGE my reality if I want to stay focused on a healthier ME!)
I grabbed my laptop, found a show my sister told me about called, "I Used To Be Fat" on MTV and headed out to my treadmill in the garage. I set the goal to walk the 1.75 miles in 35 minutes, that would make it at the rate of 3mph. I did a warm-up of 2.5, then switched to 3 after two minutes.
Oh My STARS....My body did NOT want to do this today. The 3 was killing me so I turned it down to 2.7. I then compromised and would do a minute at 2.7 then 1.5 minutes at 3. As I was approaching the 20 min mark and I wasn't close enough to one mile yet I decided to up it. So I went to 3.5...UGH! Okay, back down to 3. I gradually upped my levels and eliminated anything in the 2 range. 3, then 3.5, then 3.2, then up to 3.8!!!!! As I was working harder at the 3+ range I admit I was hanging onto the handrails. I kept hearing Jillian yelling at me, "LET GO!" I would and even tried a brief few seconds at 3.8 without holding on.
I didn't reach my original goal of 1.75 miles in 35 minutes but I DID get it done in 35:14. YAY ME!!! Wow, it was a push and it felt good to do so, I could feel myself shrinking by the minute. Oh, wait a minute, that was the girl on the show I watched. Amazingly she lost 90lbs during my 35 minute workout (in reality it took 111 days).
Thanks for the encouragement from fellow sparkers. And a HUGE THANKS to my wonderful daughter who graciously took over my obligations so I could cross off this TO DO from my list.
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