Wednesday, January 09, 2013
Well for those of you who watch my "Status" feed know I just started a new job. Sorta exciting. Its education, its close to my house. But it's as a teacher's aide, not teaching.
I have been out of work for *2 years* during which time I have applied for hundreds of jobs. In November I looked at my husband and said "If I cant get something by January, that's it. I'm done. I'll get a job as a cashier or secretary." This particular job pays the SAME as those positions, but at least its something I can put on my resume.
So Yes - Starting Things.
1) I will give myself 2-3 weeks to wallow in "Oh god, how do working people find balance time!" Then I will do it. This may mean getting up early for AM runs. This may mean Child gets to watch me sweat with a Jillian DVD. And when the weather gets warmer, I will start bicycling to work (its 3 miles) at least once per week.
2) I am restarting my program, not because I gained a buncha weight over the holiday, but because I need to reset my brain. 10 days of sickness, sloth and eating had a 3 lb impact. I've already lost 2 of the lbs so its really just one that needs my attention. But I was getting lazy with my tracking and eating anyway. So a Start-Fresh is in order.
3) I will restart blogging in my other blog. I havent posted anything since the August Monroe Triathlon. Family members comment that they enjoyed my writing and seeing what I'm up to. Now its just a matter of doing it.
Oh dear. This entry comes perilously close to New Years Resolutions.....
Sunday, January 06, 2013
2. How can you do more of the things that give you energy and less of the things that deplete your energy?
Hmm. This is a toughie. In the previous blog I identified the people around me as being both the source of energy and the greatest energy suckers. So the answer to this question is pretty simple: continue to surround myself with positive people and reject negativism.
Lets face it, misery loves company and when you feel like whining, there's nothing like a friend's shoulder to lean on. The trick is not to get trapped in that cycle of feeling helpless.
Sorry - its a short blog, but sometimes the answers, while individual, are simple. "And knowing is half the battle!"
Saturday, January 05, 2013
Leaping off of my SparkSister DogLady13's idea (she does a lovely intro)
What has given you or depleted energy from you this year?
One year ago I decided that the key for me finally losing the weight was to start tracking calories. I had lost my job in June 2010, decided this was the impetus to finally "Lose the Baby Weight!" - Nov 2010 I weighed in at an astonishing 197 lbs. Thanks to the support and encouragement of my SparkFriends, I'm now a much more manageable 156.
I gain energy from the people around me. The people around me also deplete me. You dont realize how much until you spend time around such a relentlessly positive group like SparkPeople. When you need energy, you post a blog, a question in the forums, I've even gotten emails from people when I put a sad little blurb on a Team Huddle. And we all pay it back in Spades when we have extra. We encourage each other and the group dynamic makes it possible for us to succeed as individuals.
On a more personal level, my brief stint this fall, refueled my desire, my love of teaching. When I lost my job, I lost my identity. Where most people have confidence and self worth, I was plagued with doubt. I would drop Child off at preSchool, sit on the sofa for 3 hours and cry, then scrape myself back together and go pick him up. Although the teaching assignment was temporary and flippin' FAR to commute, it refilled my confidence that I can do it, I'm not a terrible teacher and person.
Depleted: well, when you finish your first Triathlon in the freezing rain, charging up that hill and there is nothing NOTHING left in your gas tank. Then you are depleted. But go to the diner and eat Pork Souvlaki WITH the french fries. Do your first Brick workout. Then you are depleted. Break something: I've done ribs and fractured my elbow. The pursuit of endurance sports has taught me in a more viceral way than any other lesson that I should measure my best against my own best and not any others. I'm 38 yr old woman, not a 19 yr old boy. I will never be able to complete a triathlon in 56 minutes. Just not gonna happen! But I can do better than I did last time. I can set new goals for myself and be satisfied with my own performance. I can inspire the people around me. I can lead by example.
Let that be good enough.
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