Friday, December 21, 2012
So I've been pretty MIA this week. I've been working at least 10 hours a day. By the time I get home, I don't have any motivation to think, let alone log on to the computer and type. I do miss my spark friends and I'm doing my best to check up on every one.
I'm coming down with something. Yesterday my glands hurt and I was sneezing. I took it easy all day (it was my day off!) and I also went to bed early. I was a little dizzy this morning but felt generally better. I feel achy now and will go to bed after this post.
I've been eating like crap (although trying to stay in the correct calorie range) and not working out. Adding that ontop of my stress and not sleeping like I should, I'm not suprised that I am getting sick. I've tried to focus on getting some NUTRITIOUS food into my body yesterday and today. I've also tried to get my water intake in too. Hopefully this will get me well soon.
I have to remember to take some time to take care of me on top of my crazy work schedule. I can tell that I am depressed and overwhelmed by work right now. I need to stop letting it affect my eating habits, and try to reserve SOME energy for exercising. If I can't manage to exercise, then I need to at least eat nutritiously. I am trying not to beat myself up on top of every thing else. I. Am. Exhausted. Working 60 hours a week, then grocery shopping, christmas shopping, and cleaning on all my sparetime afterwards, doesn't leave a lot of relaxation or fun. I'm not making excuses for myself, I am just tired.
Tried on my wedding dress and it fell down (now i need to size exchange it lol)
People keep noticing my weight loss.
I feel better about myself.
I also physically feel better.
Things I'm thankful for:
spark people to always come back to.
My health (in general, not the being sick right now part)
Things I must remember:
Sunday, December 16, 2012
This was a little scary to post since its so intimate, however, look at the difference!
As my dear friend LOLAMOM2 has informed me, I have lost the equivalent to:
a Welsh Terrier, a large male Maine Coon, his medium-sized box of clumping litter, a car tire, an average one-year-old, a KitchenAid Standing Mixer, or a Christmas turkey that feeds 10-15 people.
HOW IT FEELS?! Easier to breethe. No knee pain. Little back pain. Quicker to move! Higher energy and overall just good. :)
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Not only is my body exhausted but my spirit feels crushed as well. I have experienced some heart break today at work. I feel that it is sad that I am that emotionally invested in my job that when I experience disappointment I actually feel pain equivalent to heartbreak. But I also think its a reflection of the passion I have for what I do. I've been on and off crying all night. I am allowing myself this one evening to grieve and really live in the emotion because its not too often that I do. However I will learn from it and move on tomorrow. But for tonight I feel sad, under appreciated, misunderstood, slighted and plain hurt.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Well apparently I've decided to give myself a break this week and RELAX. Its hard, because I worry I'm back sliding. But I am still trying to remain in calorie range. I also gave myself permission to eat pizza today. I've been craving it forever. I only had two pieces and still remained within calorie range. I didn't eat until I was going to die. So i think that is progress (hopefully?). Healthier lifestyle doesn't mean total restriction. At least that's what I'm telling myself.
I was busy running around work today so I also didn't get on the treadmill today. I believe I am having an occular migraine. My eye hurts!!!! I took a migraine medicine because its on the side of my head that has been hurting lately and my eye feels a lot better so I am assuming its a migraine, but really I have no idea. I need to get ahold of my eye doctor.
I thought about getting on the treadmill but honestly I kinda feel like I'm on the verge of exhaustion. My chest kinda feels like if I'm not careful, I may catch a cold any moment, and my head hurts all the time lately. So I have decided that TONIGHT I will not get on the treadmill. And I will TRY not to beat myself up or worry about it (although as you can probably tell, i'm not doing a very good job of that).
Mean while, since I've decided to take a break off from the activity, I'm boosting my sparking to make sure I stay on track.
Nonscale victories today:
Maintained portion control over former "trigger" food, pizza.
Things I'm thankful for:
Bonding time with Cameron this weekend (rare with teenagers).
Finally knowing who our center manager is going to be (& the person I wanted).
Having some coverage in to take some of the stress of me in the quality office.
Randy being home.
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