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My grandmother has passed... and I am a mess.

Monday, February 20, 2012

The last month has been harder for me and my family that it should have been. My grandmother had a bad uti, and was put in the hospital for antibiotics for a few days. Then she was released to go to a nursing home where my mom and aunt had arranged for her to get physical therapy. My grandmother did not move much any more. She liked sitting and watching tv and that was it, she had withdrawn from life... she was a constant fall risk and getting worse, so my mom wanted her to have physical therapy to get her moving again. We all agreed that this would be a very good thing for my grandmother.

One week at the nursing home she fell. I'm not even sure if they had started the physical therapy yet or not... we just don't know. Mamaw told my mom she got up to close her room door at 10:30 and that her knee gave out on her short walk back to bed. She said she knew they would come around at 11:00 to check on her so she wasn't worried... But they never came. Sometime during the night my grandmother pulled a blanket off her bed to cover her on the cold floor. Around 4:30 AM my mother received a call about the fall. Mamaw was taken to the hospital, where it was discovered that not only did she bust her head open bad enough to require several stitches, both her wrists were badly broken, and they both required surgery. That was done on a Monday night. They took her to ICU after the surgery because she could not come off the ventilator yet... she could not breathe on her own until the next day when she finally was able to come off it. She was in ICU for a couple days, then moved to a room... She was unable to use her arms, so she had to be fed and given drink by hand.

My mom would not send her back to the first nursing home (understandably, my mother is convinced that my grandmother laid on the floor for several hours before anyone found her.) so with the help of a social worker we found another good home that would give her physical therapy along with helping her as her wrists healed.

She went to that home on a Wednesday afternoon. She was there about 2 days, during those 2 days they had already let her enjoy a special, fully submerged bath ...twice. It seemed to be the right place... but on late Friday afternoon (Feb 3rd) she had a very massive stroke. She could no longer speak, eat, swallow, or anything at all and she was paralyzed on her full right side. She seemed to not "be there" a lot of the time... but occasionally she would focus her eyes on us and it seemed she knew who we were and that we were there. In addition to all that... she was very hard of hearing. ... this made it even harder because we had been communicating with her by writing on a white board prior to the stroke, after the stroke we could not tell if she could still read.

After several days in ICU, she was moved to a regular room... but she did not improve at all, including finding out she had pneumonia and a severe bladder infection along with everything else... and the question came up of whether or not to put in a feeding tube. I thought it was a no-brainer... of course we will feed her, however possible, but my aunt and mother didn't think that was the best thing to do. After speaking with the doctors... seeing her ct scan and how massive the stroke was, and knowing the slim chance of her recovering to any form of "normal" life... including being able to swallow, let alone feed herself, communicate... etc... they decided that just letting her go instead of artificially keeping her with us would be the best thing for her. on Feb. 9th she was moved to hospice care in the hospital. I struggled with that decision a lot, even though I know she would not have wanted to be kept alive on feeding tubes and IV's the rest of her days.... it is still a painfully hard decision to accept.

Mamaw slowly got worse, but was kept as comfortable and as pain free as possible. I sat with her many, many hours, as did my mother. She left us at 11:00PM Feb. 19th. I was not there, but I got there within minutes and she just looked just the same as before... very peaceful, very restful. I believe she died peacefully in her sleep. She was 85.

Through all this and on a very seemingly unimportant note, I threw in the towel on any dieting... and I'm sure I've gained back the bit I lost in January, although I've not weighed. The stress was so overwhelming that I just ate myself numb. I have been wanting to just stop. Stop everything. Sell all, quit all, move and start over. Everything feels like it's falling apart and is so overwhelming. I can't stop long enough to recover. I know Mamaw is no longer suffering/or in any pain... she is in heaven with her family that went before her and I know that one day I will see her again. And somehow I have got to recover from all the anxiety and stress and helplessness and sorrow I have been feeling.

Until then I have my life to live.... to the fullest, and that includes making sure my health and inactivity do not hinder my days. So it's back to the beginning and I'm trying to get ready to get fit and healthy so that on the day I die they'll be saying... "What in the hell was a 101 year old woman doing on a surfboard anyway?!?!?"

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MICHELAR 2/28/2012 9:59AM

    Sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

emoticon emoticon

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ASILLA 2/25/2012 9:37AM

    Your Mamaw was very much loved by your family. Surely that was a comfort to her having had you and your mother there with her. Sometimes when life is uncertain, it helps to have a loved one near.Thoughts and prayers going out to you and your family.

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HAILEYSMEMAW 2/22/2012 7:35PM

    sorry for your lose.
Please give yourself time for grief,before starting again.
I lost four family members within 18 months(my family &in laws)
I thought I had grieved ,but oh how wrong I was.Right in the middle of starting SP all come crashing down.
So Please take time out to remember to You can take time off &come back.
you are in my prayers

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JUSTME29 2/22/2012 7:27PM

    I'm sorry for your loss. I can truly say that I know exactly where you are right now. I lost my MIL just before Christmas, and I still haven't found a "new normal". I wish that I could offer you more than just words.

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NGCHILD 2/22/2012 1:06PM

    Sorry to hear of your loss, you are in my thoughts and prayers!


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OWENZZOO 2/21/2012 11:04PM

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother, husband, and dad all in a period of 2 years.

Just be patient with yourself. I'm not saying to give up at all, just do what you can. In the meantime, you have every right to feel how you feel. Your emotions are yours and they are perfectly okay. Be sad, be mad, be reflective and when you are ready, be happy.

Anna. emoticon

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    OH honey I have walked in your shoes when my grandmother passed from lung cancer due to second hand smoke. I was the one by her side throughout and had to be the families tower of strength as well as my own. It was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do and the heavy sorrow is so very difficult but only for a time For time does heal and the precious memories remain. Until then be gentle with yourself. Take it one day at a time to mourn embrace it in loving memory of believing that going forward is what your Grandmother would of wanted, to celebrate your life, remembering her strengths, taking them as your own along with the great memories. Now is the time to build your own so that when your times comes, you have yours to share with her. emoticon

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BURRITAELITA 2/21/2012 9:00PM


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MOMFAN 2/21/2012 4:25PM

    Hugs and prayer!

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GMO_JEN 2/21/2012 1:45PM

    I am sorry for your grandmother's loss. It sounds like she was surrounded by love, though, and that is such an important thing.

It also sounds like you were under so very much stress. I say, be gentle with yourself, and gradually get back into the swing of things so you can be that 101 year old surfer.


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SHEL1181 2/21/2012 12:21PM

    So sorry to hear about your loss and the incredible amount of stress you have going on right now. emoticon

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STORMMIEONE 2/21/2012 9:20AM

    I'm so sorry for your loss. I went through a lot of the same stuff with my mom 2 yrs ago. It was very hard.

I put on all the weight I has lost and more. I still can't get back on track. But I do visit SP everyday and I was logging my food fathfully until I got sick at Christmas and just can't get back on track. The cold weather here isn't helping since I like to take walks. I am waiting not so patiently for Spring. lol

Hang in there. Take it one day at a time. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NATIVE_ONE 2/21/2012 8:35AM

    I understand everything you just went through and I am sorry for your loss. I had to go through this very same thing two months ago. And just like you I got there just a few minutes too late. We have to believe that going forward with our lives is what our Grandmothers would of wanted, to celebrate our lives, live with our great memories and build new ones so that when our times comes, we can share as we will eventually meet with them again.

May you and your family embrace those fantastic memories you have had with her and rejoice in knowing that she is with God, no longer suffering of any kind and with other family and friends.

emoticon May you surf until you are 102 on the best beach ever!

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DASU1949 2/21/2012 8:06AM

    101 is amazing! You must have many memories to treasure.
When my wife was going through rehab for 4 months I saw many similarities in the care (or lack of) she received in nursing homes which was unfortunate.
One irony about life is that we can expect death as a reward. Your grandmother is at peace, no pain, and with her loved ones. It is hard for us still living but life goes on. The pain will lessen but the loss will remain.
Plant a tree or a Rose bush in her memory. Then every day you can look at it and be reminded of the love she gave you.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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DAISY443 2/21/2012 7:43AM

    Tears for you and your family. Hugs!

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LIBRA73 2/21/2012 6:47AM

    Oh girl!

We are certainly due a phone call! When you are ready, spark mail me and we will schedule a talk!

I know for sure your grandmother would not want you to be in pain and let all other things go. It's so hard. Sorrow is so very hard. You have great memories, and you have a family who loves you and friends that adore you. It's your time to work on you and get those surfing lessons in. I can't wait to see you on my facebook page when you are in 101, posting pics of you catching waves! (And that killer bod to go with)

Big hugs!!

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WILD4STARS 2/21/2012 3:50AM

    So sorry to hear about your grandmother. There's not much in life that is harder than losing the ones we love.

I know she would have wanted you to find the strength to get back on track, get healthy and look forward to surfing well into old age !!

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Need help on making changes.

Thursday, January 05, 2012

OK... so I've done ok so far this new year. I've been getting in the water like I should, and exercising daily altho I did miss a day. :/ But still, I'm getting there...

My problem is eating. Later in the evenings, I am just a bottomless pit! Usual scenario: I'll come home from work (lately it's been after 6 or 7 PM) and the first thing I do is shuck the work clothes, usually put on some warmups, then I eat supper. (My daughter has been getting that ready lately.) But then without thinking, I'll get seconds, thirds, cookies, and more. I want to STOP doing that!!! I want to do things differently this year and so far so good except for the eating. I'm doing the same ol' things. My word for the year is control... but lately the food is still controlling me!

Does anyone have any advice on how to thwart this behavior? Take into account that I'm usually very tired, spent, very hungry, and ready for some chill time... how do I do this without all that food? I know it's habit... I also know I'm rambling now... ugh.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SARAHTAIT 1/9/2012 1:40PM

    Get on the computer and go to spark people whenever the urge to over eat hits. Stay busy! Knowing that this is the time you are prone to snack....prepare for some healthy snacks! emoticon

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DOLLY_37 1/6/2012 3:29PM

    Everyone has given you great tips emoticon
You have the same problem as me...I eat dinner and then all eve I'm starving...belly rumbles and I want to eat...science is showing fat has a mind of it's own...I keep telling myself it's my fat talking to my brain...saying FEED ME! I have to think of it like an addiction...it's a choice....just like smoking...eating crappy stuff at night is a choice that needs self talk...but man it's hard...YOU CAN DO THIS! We'll do it together...how???? day by day...eve by eve...hour by hour...when I first quit smoking I didn't think in terms of days I thought in terms of hours....I figure wt loss will be the same way.. emoticon

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STORMMIEONE 1/6/2012 8:54AM

    Wow you've gotten lots of good ideas. I have the same problem with eating. I don't stop. With me I have found that I think it's boredom eating. If I am doing something even just reading a book I tend to not eat cause I'm not thinking about it cause I'm busy.

Hopefully you can find something that works for you. Good luck! emoticon

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SEASONS_CHANGE 1/6/2012 8:43AM

    It doesn't help that you have all of that temptation laying around the house. I've tried Zantrex-3 before and taking it on my last break at work gave me energy and NOT hungry at all in the evenings, which was pretty cool. I would at least try it until you get into the groove of grabbing something healthy to much on instead of the chips. It would be even better if the family would learn together to cook healthier meals so that everyone is leading a healthier life.

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LIBRA73 1/6/2012 7:09AM

    I love all these ideas. My hubs does the very same thing when he comes home. I started packing him a little bag of nuts and a water so on his commute home, he snacks on those and that kills the major hunger.

Food is still controlling me too! Great job on the water and exercise!

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LIVING4HIM_INWI 1/5/2012 9:24PM

    I like SHEL1181's plan with the snack, exercise, and then a meal. That's a winner! Otherwise, I'd make sure that you have good healthy filling things to eat throughout the day too, that should help keep you from feeling so hungry at the end of the day. Also, make sure that you get plenty of sleep. I tend to eat more on nights when I'm really dragging. You are going to try different things until you find what works best for you. You are going kick this habit to the curb! 2012 is your year to shine!!!!

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NATIVE_ONE 1/5/2012 8:28PM

    Sounds as if you have gotten some sound advice here already, hope some of their ideas work for you. My thing is to drink water first if I am still hungry. After about 5 minutes of waiting I figure I was thirsty not really hungry so I don't go back for more. Good luck tackling this challenge!

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SHEL1181 1/5/2012 7:23PM

    Definitely pack up the food once you get your plate. Also, I don't allow any junk food in the house....LOL, well, okay, maybe just peanut butter and chocolate chips (yeah I have been known to eat right out of the jar), but that's really it. I don't know when you exercise but that's what I do as soon as I get home. It curbs my hunger afterwards so I don't eat as much. I'm always hungry when I get home too and I'm a diabetic so I make sure to eat a small snack (maybe a banana or something similar) before I exercise. Then afterwards if I'm hungry I grab something small. Don't know if that will help you but it works for me.


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DAISY443 1/5/2012 11:59AM

    Have a bag of carrot sticks, celery and radishes in the fridge. Munch on those before you eat dinner. If you still want more after dinner, eat some more of the veggies. Drink water in between every bite you take. Should help!

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HANNALA1 1/5/2012 11:44AM

    I struggle with the mindless munching at night too so I'm not one to give advice. haha What my plan of attack is....until I can stop it completely, I prepare a 'snack plate' early in the day...so when I get in my uncontrollable munch mood...I can pick it instead of fattening foods. (Like the rest of my daughter's birthday cake that I pigged out on. Ugh!) I have celery with a thin spread of peanut butter (for the yummy peanut butter taste with a crunch) and then some popcorn. Then I have my sweet and salty fix. So hopefully it'll work until I can break this horrible, horrible habit!

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TASOGAREBAN 1/5/2012 11:31AM

    Brush your teeth right after dinner! Usually it will change the taste and will most likely stop you from wanting to eat chocolate and sugary stuff. Also, pack up dinner once you have had your serving. I tend to make dinner and I immediately put it all into tupperware (for leftovers) after my bf and I take our share. I don't put it in the fridge immediately but I find that it changes my mind to move it from pot/pan to tupperware because it makes me feel like I need to put it away. I don't know if that helps. And eat slowly and mindfully. Don't eat in front of a tv (or at least not in front of an interesting tv show/episode lol!) because you'll be distracted and just chomp down all your food. I try to enjoy my food while I eat. I'm doing it now!! emoticon

Hope that helps some!

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FUNKYG1 1/5/2012 11:30AM


First, congratulations on getting in the water. I have not for about 10 days due to this stupid cold. As for the evening eating, these are some of the tricks I tried and they worked. First of get your normal serving of dinner. Once that is on the plate, have your daughter put all the food away, out of sight. Once you have finished eating, putting your fork down after every bite, immediately clean up your dishes or have daughter to so. If you have a hobby, then get busy with it. I enjoy knitting and crocheting both of which keep my hands busy and my mind off of food. Have your last snack, cut up an apple in several pieces as it takes longer to eat or maybe some popcorn, something that takes a while to eat.

As I say, these really helped me through some tough nights and hopefully, they will help you as well. Oh and drink lots of water at dinner.


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January 1, 2012

Sunday, January 01, 2012

emoticonFirst day of the year,
emoticonFirst day of the month,
emoticonFirst day of the week,
emoticonFirst day of creating a new me.

I did weigh in this morning... and I am at the highest weight I have ever been without being pregnant. :/ But for whatever reason, I did not become upset (I have literally shed tears over weigh-ins that were less). My feeling is that of, OK... that's my starting point, and today is my first day to do something about it.

I reset all my goals and streaks here on sparkpeople.
I am determined to do things differently than before.
I received an exercise bike for Christmas that will live in the living room in front of my big tv, and I will use it.
My husband, daughter, and I have been doing some research about juicing and the benefits of that... it's very encouraging. (Have you seen the movie Fat Sick and Nearly Dead? Read or heard of the Gerson Therapy? Seen the movies The Gerson Miracle or Dying to Have Known? ... very eye opening and encouraging!) Anyhow... now we have a juicer on the way. :) That will be VERY new to us all.

I also plan on actually taking the baby steps to get my new way of life going. My first baby step is to get back to my water habit. Drinking my 8 glasses minimum daily. Don't know why I just let that go.

Second baby step is to get on my exercise bike daily.... even if just for 10 minutes (which is where I'll start).

My New Year's Resolutions:
to take it one day at a time
to be kinder to myself
to approach my goals slowly
to do things differently
to remember.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANNROSE126 1/8/2012 9:54AM

    U GO GIRL.

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NATIVE_ONE 1/3/2012 8:49AM

    Good luck with achieving your goals in 2012. And I think it is fantastic that you didn't beat yourself up about your weigh in. Too many I think depend on what the scale says and the big story is a whole lot more that what a scale reads.

Best wishes for 2012!

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HANNALA1 1/2/2012 6:47PM

    You can do it! emoticon

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STORMMIEONE 1/2/2012 8:38AM

    Good for you! Baby steps. Take it one day ay a time emoticon

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SPARKNMOM 1/1/2012 11:36PM

    I love that seeing the current weight didn't discourage, but served as a starting point. That's what I, too, will do tomorrow when I step my scale. New start. New beginning weight. New journey to goal. It's OK that it's the 100th time...as long as I get to goal....and WE will!!!

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SGKAYLOR 1/1/2012 8:23PM

    One day at a time, you can totally do this!!! 2012 is our year!!

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SEASONS_CHANGE 1/1/2012 7:02PM

    Sounds like you are approaching it very well. I'm confident that you can do it and look forward to seeing your progress throughout the year.


of a whole new you...

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BEACH_BABY_82 1/1/2012 2:43PM

    I am doing the same thing you are. I think we will both be fine. At church today we talked about choosing one word to be our word for the year... Mine was 'Action'. What would yours be if you had to choose just one word?

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DAISY443 1/1/2012 2:07PM

    Baby steps turn into giant gains! Good plan! emoticon

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LIBRA73 1/1/2012 12:45PM

    I love it! Those goals are really good, reasonable. I haven't seen those movies are know anything about juicing. But if you find that it works, I am gonna try that too!

I am going to set some knew goals etc when everyone gets back to their routines in this house and I can concentrate!

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CHARLIE-B 1/1/2012 12:27PM

    Oh my Renee`, great minds work together. 10 minutes is my starting point on my exercise bike too and I'm doing Green Smoothies now. A lot like juicing I guess, just done with a blender.

We are going to make our goals in 2012!!!! emoticon


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WOUBBIE 1/1/2012 12:18PM

    FlyLady always recommends taking a full month to focus on one habit and really get it ingrained. She said she used to put post-it notes all over the house to remind her to do a particular thing. Drinking enough water is tough for a lot of us. I still slip and I've been working on it for several years! At least it has finally re-trained my brain to recognize the "thirsty" signal separately from the "hungry" signal. I used to eat a lot when I was probably actually only thirsty.


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LIVING4HIM_INWI 1/1/2012 11:53AM

    Agreed, one step at a time! And if you happen to take a step backward, don't let it keep you going back, just start again right away with one step forward! You'll do it! You will make great progress in 2012! I just know it!!!! I've been praying for you and your family!!! 2012 is a great year already!!!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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GOLDDUSTTWIN 1/1/2012 11:04AM

    emoticon every journey or goal begins with one step forward.
Re-examining what we do is a good thing.
May you continue to work to your goal

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Jingle the Jiggle Challenge (Drop the Jiggle!) Week 2 blog

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Ok.. I forgot to blog yesterday... I'm sorry.... forgive me? :)

I have my living room all Christmasy now. Our tree is up, decorations are out... it looks pretty good... even if I'm not quite finished, it's really close. My dining room is still decorated for Thanksgiving... but the day after the feast that will change. :)

I really don't have too much to blog about.
I'm not doing well on the challenge. I keep eating too much, moving and drinking water too little, forgetting the vitamins and so forth... it's just sad... especially since I recognize these problems and yet... still allow them to continue. And that's what it is... I'm allowing myself to falter. Ugh... my excuses are that I'm tired, depressed, overwhelmed, and just plain ol' lazy. I'm at work right now... still (it's after 7PM), and I wanna go home so bad, but I have at least an hour's more stuff to do... (why am I blogging now?, I needed a break!!!)

I need some support, encouragement, advice, and empathy. Y'all ever get this way?

Well... back to the work!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SPARKNMOM 11/19/2011 1:20AM

    I'm slowly crawling back on the wagon. Seems like I've been doing this same yo-yo thing forever, but at least I haven't completely thrown in the towel. Just keep at it. Day by day....we'll get there :)

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WOUBBIE 11/16/2011 9:11AM

    I'm a big fan of FlyLady and her number one rule is:


Maybe there are just too many pieces to the challenge for you. What if you focused on just one thing, like drinking enough water? I gotta admit, it took me close to 3 years to establish that one routine so firmly that I do it by habit/instinct now, but it was definitely worth it.

One thing FlyLady never touches on, though, is how to make things DOABLE. The reasons that I didn't drink enough water are not the reasons that you don't, and it can take a long time and a lot of analysis to get to the bottom of your own personal reasons. (Mine turned out to be easy. I don't like to sip water; I want to guzzle it and get it over with. I finally committed myself to buying the thin plastic bottled water because the bottles collapse as I drink and I can down 8 oz in about 5 seconds. And yes, I recycle dilligently. :) That overcame my objection to drinking enough water, but your issues are very likely different. Maybe you can ask yourself what specifically is stopping you and how to overcome those objections?)

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STORMMIEONE 11/16/2011 8:58AM

    I'm right there with ya too. I know exactly what I'm doing wrong but that doesn't stop me. Hang in there

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LIBRA73 11/16/2011 7:06AM

    I hear you!

I hate to hear that you are feeling depressed. It's very tough to get out of that.

I think the Christmas decor should help lift your spirits some.

I felt the same way for about a month and half. I was just not doing what I know I should and KNOWING that I wasn't doing what I should just made it worse! Something in me clicked...I think it was finally being brave enough to get on the scale. I was stunned at the weight I put on. So I got my rear in gear *again*. I got to. I am so not happy with this fat roll. (see my last blog)

I would drag you out myself if I could. Walks help me. I love being outside when I feel depressed. What about getting out a bit? Talking to your kids? (not about yoru depression, but their lives, friends) I know you love them more than life itself. Just being around young people lifts me up sometimes. Listening to them talk about their friends and lives might lift you up? A devotional? I just finished one on worry and stress and it was pretty cool. Wish I was there.

Big hugs girl! Get on that dreadmill and just do it. Don't argue, just do it!! You are a force when you want to be!!

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GMO_JEN 11/16/2011 12:35AM

    I am so with you! I keep trying to be good, but I am just not feeling it-eating too much, and movin way too little too! I haven't even tried vitamins yet, so you are ahead of the game if you are getting it in most of the time! And, we still have time, so you can still jingle that jiggle off! And, I can cheer you along...even from my couch ;)

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CRAZY_KAT_1984 11/15/2011 8:13PM

    Wow! You already have your tree up and decorated?! I don't even know if I'm putting mine up yet...As for the rest, you sound like me about 2 months ago. I have to say, I've made fitness a priority, but the rest of my home is messy! My putting a dollar in a jar after each workout helps me see exactly how much I'm exercising and helps motivate me. Also, focusing on getting more sleep made the rest of my day go so much better emoticon I hope some of my suggestions help!

As for me, I'm having a dabburn day, but it's almost over now. I also have finally figured out my calorie equation emoticon
I'm doing great on my exercise streak, though! Tomorrow is a new day!

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    I've been there with you so many times & it's a constant fight for me to stay with it. In fact, I've just started over for the "millionth" time, but I refuse to give up & you shouldn't give up either. I like to remind myself that I am a beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be healthy and not be trapped in this body that I now find myself in. Don't give up!!! As I tell myself...Suck it up, Buttercup. You CAN do this!!! No pity parties here. Do what I keep trying to do. Take one day at a time & when that seems too hard....take one minute at a time. I'll be thinking of you. emoticon emoticon

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JUSTME29 11/15/2011 7:53PM

    I'm right there with you. I wish I had something better, but at least I can keep you company.

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Jingle the Jiggle Challenge (Drop the Jiggle!) Week 1 blog

Monday, November 07, 2011

Ok... this here is that blog I've been promising to do, seein' how it is part of the challenge to blog weekly. :) Looks like my blog days will be Mondays so long as I remember. :) Mondays will be good, too, since that's right after the weekend, and perhaps that will force me to do better, seein' how I'm gonna have to tell on myself anyways. :)

So... we're one week into the Jiggle the jingle challenge and I have not been doing well at all. My eating is out of control, my exercise has been nil, I've forgotten to take my vitamins nearly every day, I'm not drinking my water like I have been previously, and my mood has been pretty down lately. Bummer of a week last week, really.

But today picked up big time... I got up at a good early hour, ate oatmeal for breakfast (and coffee!) and walked a mile on the ol' dreadmill while watching Vampire Diaries (love that show) did a ton of laundry (while watching even more Vampire Diaries) and even got to talk to a really good friend I met here on spark! That was absolutely terrific! (love ya, girl!!) then I did more laundry and watched more Vampire Diaries, but... I did pig out on crackers with cheese and peanut butter. :/ My fault for not having a lunch planned and eating in front of the TV. ... anyhow, then I made a huge pot of chili for supper, did even more laundry, and then this evening attended the quorum court meeting where my daughter's flag design was accepted via an official resolution! It was a contest for our county school students (celebrating the 100th year of our court house) and my daughter's was picked! She got an official copy of the Resolution and $50! How cool is that? !!!! :) They had 3 flags total made... 1 is flying at the court house. Way cool.

So... today is a good start to this week and hopefully I'll do better on the vitamins, food and water and keep up with the dreadmill mile.

I don't know how much weight I can lose between now and Dec 15th (last day of the challenge)... any loss will be welcomed. I just want to stick to this one! I"m so bad about fizzling out!!! I don't want to fizzle again. For me... fizzling out also equates to a weight GAIN and that's the pits.

I think I can beat the fizzle this time!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTME29 11/8/2011 8:52PM

    Congrats to your daughter! That's so awesome.

You can definitely beat the fizzle! Want to borrow a stick?

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    Congrats to your daughter - what an honor! And best of luck with the rest of your week, it sounds like you're off to a great start emoticon

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BADSEEDGIRL 11/8/2011 10:03AM

    Etch new day is a new chance to make the right decisions. So you had a bad week, we all do. Just try to do better the next day. When I first started having to take meds regularly, I would often forget, but I started putting a post-it note on my steering wheel of my car that said "Did you take your pills?" When I got in the car it was there and if I had not I would run in and take them before I left for the day, you might try that with your vitamins! Good luck!

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STORMMIEONE 11/8/2011 8:42AM

    Congrats to your daughter.

Halloween candy, time change and colder weather are making it hard for me to stick to eating right and exercising. I really need to get back on the fitness train.

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LIBRA73 11/8/2011 7:20AM

    I know what you mean. My eating would top Jabba The Hut's eating! If I don't stop, I am gonna look like him!

I did laundry all day yesterday, too! Still have one little load to finish this am!

Yesterday was terrific, and we gotta do that again!

I don't what kind of weight I will lose, but I am so not in the mood to gain! So here goes nothing! No running around like a crazy person this am. I should be able to get that turbo in with no problem!

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LIVING4HIM_INWI 11/7/2011 9:52PM

    Congrats on your daughter's success!!!

Now for you, you need to find something fun that you enjoy for exercise or maybe do several different things to mix it up! You don't want to dread it. I do admit that most exercise is hard to get motivated to do but I know what works for me is to schedule it with a friend or several friends because then if the one friend backs out, there are still more to keep you going. Keep trying different things until you find something that works for you and isn't such a chore. When you start to exercise more the other stuff will either fall in place easier or will not be as important anymore.

Keep going cuz you're worth it!!!!!!

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