Friday, August 19, 2011
For a number of years, I attended a retreat center in southerm Missouri called Diana's Grove, which offered leadership training. Each year there was a Rites Team, a group of people who were working at an especially intense level that year, moving toward "initiation". One year, that Team came up with the motto "Do It Afraid".
I've been inspired tonight by some Sparks, especially the blog called "Like a Virgin", to Do It Afraid, and have proceeded to give myself a goal that really frightens me. I've promised to start looking for a personal trainer, and start working with that person as soon as I am done with the Diabetes and Exercise study I have volunteered for (they asked for sedentary subjects, and don't want me to change my exercise habits in mid-stream, because it will mess up the data).
I have never been athletic, and have never been graceful except when dancing (and not always then). I was always the kid picked last for the teams in PE class, and hated it with a passion. I have thought about a personal trainer before, even investigated to some extent, but have always stopped, imagining myself in thrall to some young, naturally athletic, hard-bodied type who can't imagine that my lack of athleticism is more than innate laziness. And let's face it, it would be really embarrassing to have someone like this watching and critiquing my inept efforts.
None the less, I am going to do it this time. What is the worst that can happen? I'm the one hiring this person, and if they are working for me I can insist that they work WITH me, not against me, right? And there is some level of time constraint just because I can't afford to continue hiring someone to do this for long--just long enough to get me started and educated as to HOW to do it.
So, going to go play with my granddaughter for the rest of tonight, and tomorrow when she goes home, the phone book and Web search begin.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Things are back on track for me again today, thank heavens. I have met both my goal of not eating out when I'm tired and hungry, got out of the grocery store without junk food when I was tired and hungry, and have done my 15 minutes of constructive something around the house both yesterday and today. I decided that the kitchen was NOT going to happen in an hour or two, so I am cleaning it a few drawers at a time in my 15 minute sessions--have five kitchen drawers that are dust free and straight, plus I found a favorite small cutting board that I lost MONTHS ago. And I lost a little bit when I weighed today. I'm still no where close to where I was last Sunday when I officially weighed, but it's better than yesterday by a long shot. So, onward to tomorrow.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Feeling a little discouraged today. My weight has gone UP the last three days, in spite of doing everything "right" except for a small glitch yesterday (around 250 calories over the top of my limit), with a LOT of exercise to off-set it. I am almost back where I started, and I don't know why.
Yesterday evening was difficult. Went for a stress test for a research study I volunteered for, which was supposed to be about 45 minutes long. I got there at 5:30, but the doctor wasn't there, and there were two people ahead of me already waiting. The stress test was difficult mostly because I had to breath into some machine with my mouth instead of through my nose, and it nearly killed me. (Amazingly, I didn't break a sweat.) By that time it was 7:30 PM, and I was slightly nauseated at the idea of left-over Chicken Tagine at home, so I went and got a gyro and Greek salad at a little local place. It was late when I ate, of course, so that may explain some of today's 1.8 pound weight gain per WiiFit, but geeze--that much?
Even more annoying, I ached and kept waking up all last night, in spite of taking ibuprofen and a warm shower before bed, and woke up tired, achy, and extremely low on energy. Why do other people feel energized by extreme exercise? All I feel afterwards is crappy.
Eating right again today, and will try to get in my WiiFit tonight, and my 15 minutes around the house. Didn't get either done yesterday, what with getting home so late and being so tired. The stress test definitely replaced the WiiFit, though. :)
Monday, August 15, 2011
Went to GoodWill today, and bought three skirts and a skirt suit for $16.00, none of which currently fit me. I was doing one of the motivation things last week, and realized that I usually fall off the weight-loss wagon about the time I have to go buy new clothes or go naked (something none of us want to see). I hate shopping, and decided maybe I was stopping at that point SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SHOP AGAIN IN A COUPLE MONTHS. So, I decided then and there that I was going to get a few clothes "ahead" so that I would have something to wear when the glorious day comes that my pants fall off. Since I just cleaned and sorted my bedroom on Saturday, I know that I have lots of tops and blouses I can grow back in to, but I was going to be short on bottoms, thus my purchases today when I took all the stuff I will never willingly put on my body again to GoodWill. They got something, I got something.
Then I went to the grocery store and got out without buying any of the candy sitting by the checkout counter, in spite of being hungry by that time.
Came home, ate a quick snack so I wouldn't snack all night, then made rice to go with the left over Chef Meg's shrimp creole (which I really like, BTW) to take for lunch tomorrow, boiled some eggs for breakfast since I seem to be getting hungry early and am perpetually low on protein, cut up cauliflower to pre-package for lunches and pre-packaged grapes for the same purpose, and made a good dinner.
THEN, I got on the WiiFit determined to do my 100 calories I have promised myself each day, and actually got up to over 200 calories.
Ya' know, I can do this when I put my mind to it.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Yesterday was so energizing, I thought maybe this time I was going to keep going on my goal to do something constructive each day without a struggle, but no.... Today, I spent much of my time on the couch trying to convince myself to get up and do something, anything. Finally made it at about 3PM, and did my hour's worth of work around the house. Cleaned the bathroom cupboards today. They not only look much better, but are much easier to use and find stuff in now. Again, it didn't take that long, so why did I put it off so long? I spent more time and energy worrying about doing it than I did actually getting it done. I could kick myself when I do things like that. I saw there is a SparkTeam for people like me, and I need to get off my duff and get involved in that. Anyway, I did get to my goal, no matter how long it took, so I guess that's all that counts.
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