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Can FOUR THOUSAND People Truly Be Wrong? - May 12, 2011

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Something occurred today that has deeply troubled me: One of the most popular bloggers on this site, one who has truly motivated many, with over 4,000 followers, felt impelled to leave this site.

This is the second instance in as many weeks wherein certain blogs had to be modified to conform to the opinion, seemingly, of the offended few. In the other instance, I actually understood the reasoning behind all the x'ed out thoughts: It, frankly, was racist, albeit directed by the author to the author herself. It, too, caused an uproar from well-meaning individuals supporting the blogger.

But today's instance was totally different: It seemed to involve, as far as I could tell, some well-published web pictures from other sites that, although not pornographic in any true sense of the word, might have offended a few. In the context of weight loss and exercise, it really did not seem inappropriate. But that is my own opinion.

What strikes me as disturbing, is there seems to be a group, hopefully small, of individuals who feel impelled to troll this site, lurking in the background, cloaked in anonymity, hiding behind a computer screen, gathering data to report to the "powers that be", of anything they perceive as "inappropriate." Now, mind you, these folks are not being paid for these "services". They do it of their own volition.

I would like to know when did this site become a forum, seemingly, to "study" the "inappropriate" nature of others' postings? Isn't this site predicated on the fact that there are many here seeking the support of others, as they embark on a major lifestyle change to reach a healthier conclusion, as opposed to the way they have been living in the past? Wasn't that the idea?

How does an individual with well over 4,000 followers become such a threat, on a regular basis, to a handful, who obviously have some deep-seated need to have this incredibly large group conform to their own way of thinking? When did SP become about this elite group?

I really feel that some should re-examine their reason for being here and what their true motives are. Some serious introspection is in order here. It's truly a shame that such an incredible and popular role model (ergo the title, "Can 4,000 People Truly Be Wrong?") who served as a beacon for many, by her own example, is now gone from the site.

Let me ask a question of these shadowy individuals: Did this action on your part to report this person's blog, help you exercise today? Are you now better equipped to lose weight, now that she is gone? Why exactly are you on this site?

I seriously think you need to take a good, long hard look at yourself (or "yourselves" if you are more than one person), and re-examine exactly what kind of a new life you want for yourself. And can you attain it, without making it at the expense of another individual who has done you no harm and has actually helped motivate many?

Something to think about.

______________________

Addendum: How ironic that the two most popular blogs for today are both written by this person. Now what does that tell you? And what is even more ironic, anyone wanting to read the posting cannot reach it because "the member does not exist." Have we crossed over into Alice's mirror world? Does any of this make any sense at all?

One final remark: It occurred to me after I wrote this, that once the blogs went private some time ago, at the discretion of the author, any person wanting to continue reading the blogs had to "friend" the author. That being said, it is now blatantly obvious that one of these "fans" was, in fact, the one that did her in. How sad is that? Where is the PSA for adults who bully their peers?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PYNNER 5/17/2011 11:26PM

    If you don't like someone's blog just click away from it. I agree, Sparkers who blog are working through their journey of thoughts. Unfortunately there are people out there who get high on power and if they can cause harm to others it boosts their egos. These are sad people, I have had lots of experience with someone like this. I hope things like this do not continue.

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BUTTERFLYLAURA 5/17/2011 6:10AM

    That is truly sad. I've not been about here. That is really heart breaking to read that happened here.
Thank you for the posting here.
Blessings,
Butterfly Laura
emoticon

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REDLACED 5/17/2011 3:17AM

    Thanks for blogging about this as I was wondering what had happened to these bloggers!

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BEVERLEAF 5/17/2011 1:23AM

    I guess I've missed out on reading ANY of Yoovie's blogs and having gotten to know her. I wish I had! This is a surprise to me, but I've only been a SP member for 6 months. I had no idea anything like this could happen so it's good to know. I guess I'd better not post any of my nude elbow photos on here or someone will turn me in for being some kind of perv. Thanks for the very well written blog, and I'll be watching to see if there's any news about what's become of Yoovie.



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SM-ARTGIRL 5/17/2011 1:13AM

    There is a new team called "inspired by yoovie".
Show your support.
Bullying is not acceptable in real life or online.
emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/17/2011 1:15:17 AM

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DWILCZKO 5/17/2011 12:41AM

  such craziness!

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PRINCESSNIBBLES 5/17/2011 12:28AM

    Thank you for posting! I have not read any of the person's blogs, but it is sad that she was harassed to the point of leaving emoticon

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WISEDUP1 5/17/2011 12:04AM

    Well said!
Why is it that this "friend" could not remove themselves from her list if it was bothersome?!
I hope that Yoovie decides to come back! She is a bigger girl being who she is meant to be as a person!
Blessings...

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STIMPYKINS 5/16/2011 11:17PM

    I agree with you!! It's a shame that the trolls that caused this whole mess can still skulk around Spark under the cloak of anonymity. I hope that the powers that be will see this whole mess for what it is- a few disgruntled crankpots who do not like reading about a bold and vibrant woman living her life to the fullest. I loved Yoovie's posts and looked forward to them every day- I feel like I have lost a friend. I wonder how many "complaints" Spark received about her in relation to the number of people who "liked", subscribed, or read her blogs.

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KRISTEN_SAYS 5/16/2011 11:05PM

    Thanks for posting. I miss Yoovie!

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JAKOTAMJ 5/16/2011 11:02PM

    Amen & Amen!!

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DANCINGBRAVE 5/16/2011 10:28PM

    This site is voluntary; not compulsory. If members don't like the ethos of another, just move on. There are too many people in today's world that feel they can impose their thin-skinned, I-am-easily-offended view on the rest of us. I am sad that Yoovie felt that she had to shut shop because of a bunch of bullies. I imagine that those of us who speak out against them can expect "retaliation" ...not everyone will accept it.

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A-NEW-PAULA 5/16/2011 9:35PM

    I'm glad you are not going to be intimidated by these people into leaving! Have you read FIT WHITS blog about it? It is really good too. According to her Yoovie decided to delete her page. I wish she would have stayed and used this situation to bring about positive change but I guess that someone or some people took it to the next level and harrassed Yoovie off of SP in her normal life. That is probably the scariest part for me!

I didn't see the pictures that everyone is up in arms about but Yoovie is a photographer AKA a artist. They have a much broader perspective on what is considered art and not pornography! But yes someone who had "friended her" was her Judas! I find this whole this very upsetting...where does it end?

Great blog!!!


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PINKIEB1 5/16/2011 9:20PM

    Thanks for this blog. I've left groups because other members have have nothing better to do than start arguments over nothing. SP is about support, hope, and positive action, not tearing people down because they don't act or believe just like you.

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OAKASHANDTHORN 5/16/2011 9:17PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

What sicko's would criticize Yoovie's blogs???

She was the BEST!

I demand that she be brought back!!!!!

I can not believe this happened!

It makes me want to leave SP in protest.

AND, I might add, nobody FORCED these detractors to read Yoovie's blogs! If they didn't like what she wrote, why didn't they take their weird little sensitivities and paranoias elsewhere? Ditto for choice of artwork.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon



Comment edited on: 5/16/2011 9:28:44 PM

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DUNLAPMOM 5/16/2011 8:49PM

    Ok......This is crazy!!!!!!!!!!! bring this Person back! I mean...REALLY! How can so many people be motivated by one person and not get the support of the site she is providing that for. I'm new and I dont know if I even want to get really involved in this program due to the drama. BRING HER BACK FOR GOODNESS SAKES! What happened to freedom of speech! The right to pursue happiness. Notice it doesnt say we have a right to it we just can pursue it! Let it go for creepers sakes! Oh ya....BRING HER BACK!

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MJC1971 5/16/2011 8:21PM

    Thank you for being the voice for so many of us who feel exactly as you do. Yoovie was a HUGE inspiration to so many of us and will definitely be missed.

Comment edited on: 5/16/2011 8:21:43 PM

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NUMD97 5/16/2011 7:54PM

    I have noticed something interesting since posting this blog: The spam content of a certain sort has increased in my e-mail folder. I realize that this sounds outright paranoid, but I just made the connection: It seems to be generating because of the traffic here.

Just so the haters know: I will not be intimidated. As long as I "play by the rules" as set forth by this site, and do not allow racism or pornography to cross my page, the rest is pretty much fair game. Are your lives THAT wretched that the only satisfaction you receive is hurting others who have done you no harm? I really pity you.

I strongly suggest you get the help you obviously so desperately need. And let the rest of the nice folks continue to play nicely in this cyber-sandbox.

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SWEETMOMMY41 5/16/2011 7:50PM

  i agree. please bring back Yoovie! i love her blogs,too and i find her very motivating,inspiring!

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TEAM-SARAH 5/16/2011 7:32PM

    Well put!

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MRSSCHENCK 5/16/2011 6:52PM

    Great post. I was thinking about Yoovie today and wondering what we could do to get her to come back.

Yoovie if you are reading this...come back. We miss you. emoticon

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CUDDLYPOLARBEAR 5/16/2011 6:24PM

    Youve hit the nail on the head with your blog....thanks for posting

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AML05030 5/16/2011 6:06PM

    Poor YOOVIE :( I hope she sees that we miss her. I love her kick butt attitude! She's no nonsense like Jillian Michaels! I need that kick in my pants and she would give it! Or if i was down she'd make me laugh!

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CHAOTICMOM4 5/16/2011 6:01PM

    My breakfasts just aren't 'Sexy' anymore without Yoovie.
emoticon

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PATIENCEISAVRTU 5/16/2011 5:52PM

  I hope I don't get kicked off for this as I'm new and I love SP. Due to being new I also have missed the opportunity to enjoy YOOVIEs motivational blogs etc.

Hopefully this won't last as I hope the staff from SP are taking note and doing something about this. Maybe somehow they can convince YOOVIE to come back and effectively manage the complaints of the minor few who she upsets (suggest feedback to them of "We have many members who love this blog and find it motivational, which is what this site is for, ff this offends you please don't read it and move onto something else".)

I teach my children responsibilty and accountability. It's about time we stop letting the small few dictate for the masses.
The few should take responsibility and don't go near blogs like this. They need to get over themselves, become not soooo selfish and think about the beneift of the site for others.

This site is about motivation - I hope this is movtivation enough for something to be done!!!!

SP STAFF PLEASE NOTE WE WANT AND NEED YOOVIE BACK!!

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BLUEJAYKIM 5/16/2011 5:36PM

    Thanks for posting. It is a shame to not see her on here anymore. I enjoyed her weekly and monthly challenges and her way about life. So sad to not see her here, but hoping for a revival.

Bring back YOOVIE!

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SHOAPIE 5/16/2011 5:07PM

    emoticon emoticonYou've said it so eloquently. I miss her too.

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TASOGAREBAN 5/16/2011 4:38PM

    It seems someone went to a LOT of trouble just to get Yoovie kicked off. Which kinda sucks. I always loved Spark because it was full of such motivating, caring people. That's the general consensus ABOUT Spark, whether it be by members or by magazines and online sites. Spark is the feel-good, motivating weight loss site. This whole incident just leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

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LULU3561 5/16/2011 3:30PM

    Exactly my thoughts - how could her blogs with so many followers be offensive? I don't get it I loved her blogs.
emoticon

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KATV865 5/16/2011 3:27PM

    Great post, thanks for speaking up about this.

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CAMSMOM918 5/16/2011 3:23PM

    i haven't been online in a couple of days so didn't know all what was going on . . . thank you for bringing all this up. all of this narc'ing is so stupid - honestly. and, you know, it's not like she doesn't offer a "disclaimer" as to what you were going to encounter on her page or by reading her blogs. She is a no-nonsense, in your face, make no excuses type of person and that was makes her so inspirational.

And to the narcs: Grow up! It's like what some people consider to be objectionable television, radio, movies, etc. - if you don't like it, turn it off, change the channel, don't pay to see it . . . really simple not rocket science stuff here. i just wrote her, too, to thank her for being such an inspiration to me . . .

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
balls - lol

Angela

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KERRIJANE123 5/16/2011 3:06PM

    I think it's the first time I've taken the time to read every single comment here, hoping for one of Yoovie's detractors to speak up and help us to understand their point of view. Not one! I guess that says it all!

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-CURVALICIOUS- 5/16/2011 3:04PM

    I HOPE I offend people with my blogs. I hope my words resonate deeply with people and while they may be offended, they will get something out of it. So many people look at the words instead of the meaning.

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MIMI61604 5/16/2011 3:03PM

  It seems as though someone 'friended' Yoovie just for this purpose. But, like others here, if people didn't like what they were reading/seeing, why didn't they just leave? I'm sure if the rest of us had no life we could find plenty of posts on SP that offend us...but I don't think normal, non-psychotic people care to look. Maybe they were jealous of Yoovie!?

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GINGERMACC 5/16/2011 3:01PM

    Thank you for this blog entry. I agree with you wholeheartedly and miss her and her uplifting, funny, irreverent, and 'kick ass' blogs. The person(s) who reported her should be ashamed of themselves for treating her the way they did. I hope they know that karma is a bitch.

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LIFEINMOTION 5/16/2011 2:39PM

    well, crap. i was hoping it was just a glitch that i could no longer access her blog. i don't understand why the offended culprits can't just mind their own business and stop reading her blog if they don't like it...

Comment edited on: 5/16/2011 3:23:00 PM

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DEBBIEOLMOS57 5/16/2011 2:34PM

    we will miss her

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EMPTRS 5/16/2011 2:24PM

    Amen to that! I am too busy trying to change my life to be bothered to judge other people's blogs! Let's remember why we are here!

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TRISHADEE1 5/16/2011 2:22PM

  She was an all inspiring person and she will be badly missed. emoticon

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ANEWLEAF81 5/16/2011 1:43PM

  Well put. Some people really need to just get a life. If something offends you, DON'T READ IT, LOOK AT IT, or INVOLVE YOURSELF WITH IT.

Also, shame on Spark for not allowing freedom of speech to win out here. I saw the photograph you are referring to, and if that offends people on here, they should turn their computers off...there are many "offensive" images lurking behind every mouse click.

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GRUBBMEISTER 5/16/2011 1:21PM

  Jealousy.......the Devil's favorite tool! Even after Yoovie's gone she will be remembered!

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JELLAJIGGLES 5/16/2011 1:01PM

    Amen sister. I am really considering moving on to a free weightloss site that is less conservative.

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NUMD97 5/16/2011 12:57PM

    I believe you are mistaken, BAILEE_GRAVES. Once a page is taken as "private", you do, indeed, need to be added as a "friend." Case in point, someone today cited another blog as a positive example, and many clicked on it to see the link in its entirety, and found it could not be accessed. Perhaps that is not a good example, since the popular blog was the original poster, not the link.

But note, that the person in question HAD two popular blogs the day all this happened and neither could be accessed, but in fairness, I'm no longer sure why.

But, frankly, it doesn't really matter. Poor behavior should not be condoned, and the people who feel it "necessary" to do this, are, as others have pointed out, cowards for hiding behind their anonymity. I am a firm believer that one should conduct oneself in the same good fashion whether on line or off line ("up close and personal"), and the manners that we were taught as children should prevail in either situation. If one would not say something to someone's face, it is certainly inappropriate to "lash out" from behind a computer screen.

Comment edited on: 5/16/2011 1:32:27 PM

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AJAYZCHAOS 5/16/2011 12:51PM

    It seems that soon SP will become a for pay site and only those whose views meet w/these chosen few will be allow to blog here. Thanks for pointing out the glaring wrongs that are being done by the few who think they are the elite but are doing so much harm to so many. Perhaps the PTB will think on it but I doubt it.

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REBEKAHJOHNSON 5/16/2011 12:48PM

    My last blog offended a couple people as well. I don't care. I'm not changing it. At least I didn't get flagged I guess. Its my opinion, on my blog, on my page... I'll say what I want. D@mn it.

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BAILEE_GRAVES 5/16/2011 12:46PM

    Just to let you know....once a blog is named a "Popular Blog" you don't have to be a person's friend to read it. It's available to everyone. I wasn't one of Yoovie's friends but would read her blogs when they came up on the "Most Popular Blog" page.

Just clarifying that as it means it wasn't necessarily one of her Spark friends who reported anything. It could have been anyone.

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DESERTFLOWERG 5/16/2011 12:32PM

    I am a cynic about the introspection capability of individuals who seek to censor others. Unfortunately, I really expect that the "thought police" are proud of what they have done.
But I am glad you have invited them to reflect about their motives.


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EGR2BEME 5/16/2011 12:29PM

    Thank you for what you posted! I am not familiar with the blogger that you are referencing...at least I do not think that I am.

I believe that everyone is entitled to their opinion...when I read a post from someone that I do not agree with, I click off and move on!

I do find posts that I do not agree with, and people that feel that need to preach...so to speak. I dislike the tone so I quickly exit rather than get myself upset. I don't feel the need to turn them in to the SPARK leaders.

And your remark that the complainers would have to be a "friend" is so true and makes their intent even more suspect.

This is the United States of America people...freedom of speech. Take what you need and leave the rest.

I am so sorry that a popular blogger was compelled to leave...by most likely one or two sorry individuals. I hope they are reading the posts here and taking a good hard look at themselves.

Thanks again for posting this message!



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JELLI-LEAN 5/16/2011 11:58AM

    emoticon emoticon

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JULIA1154 5/16/2011 11:51AM

  Thanks for posting this. I'm truly distressed that SP apparently allowed this to happen.

Wanda, you've hit the nail on the head :)

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If I Am Not For Myself, Who IS For Me? - May 5, 2011

Thursday, May 05, 2011

This is basic. And, no, it's not my original thought, but one that has always had strong meaning for me.

One has to be strong, confident, a warrior, in fact. One must believe in what one has to offer. No one gets rewarded who cannot exude confidence. I need to revisit that. And often. I have to believe in myself. If I don't, no one will "buy" what I'm "selling". And if that is so, then whose fault is that?

Men, most certainly "get" this. Women really need to get on this bandwagon as well. Perhaps more than they usually do.

The business world loves this. And as I head for Interview #2 today (the more important one), I am reminded of this.

And, yes, I am for myself. And if not now, when?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PHEBESS 5/5/2011 8:38PM

    I love Rev Hillel!

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KATYAROSE 5/5/2011 1:06PM

    I love this blog, and thank you so much for the reminder! Women must get on this bandwagon, and absolutely more than we usually do! As you said, "the business world loves this." Thanks for your post!

Oh, and here are some fantastic resources on confidence building for women - The Hot Mommas Project - largest database of case studies of women role models int he world AND the Chief Hot Momma, Kathy Korman Frey, is a Twitter Queen! If you follow her, you'll get tons of great advice and encouragement. Her blog is also wonderful!

http://www.hotmom
masproject.org/casebrowse.aspx<
BR>@ChiefHotMomma
http://hot
mommasproject.wordpress.com/201
1/04/09/women-power-and-money-s
ummit-hot-mommas-project-financ
ial-literacy-teaching-tools/

Good luck with job interview #2!
emoticon

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RAINBOWCHOC 5/5/2011 12:59PM

    positive thinking is a great tool
best wishes, Sandra

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It Is So Incredibly Easy - May 1, 2011

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Bet you thought I was going to say, "It's so incredibly easy to lose the weight, that it is the maintaining that will prove to be the harder of the two tasks." Well, that's not where I am today.

What is so incredibly easy, is to gain back weight. When we struggle so mightily to lose a pound, even miraculously sometimes, two pounds a week. To put back four in a week is not a difficult task. THAT we know how to do expertly. We've been doing it for decades. What we are seeing now is HOW MUCH, calorie-wise, it takes to put back that amount weekly, if we are religious trackers. That little computation can be positively astounding.

And then there are the games we love to play:

If we eat 500 calories above SP's recommended allowance, can we maintain our current weight? Can we even lose weight by doing that?

How about this:

I can't go to the gym, or go for my daily walk this week, because there is SO much work to do elsewhere, so if I stay CLOSE to the calorie range, that should be okay, right?

It's amazing how much noise we can generate in our own heads. No one else needs to know. It's just "us" in here.

So many, myself included, started "this time" with tremendous passion and dedication to the task at hand. Months and months into it, we get tired of being "so good". We start to lose our way: We don't need to be on Spark anymore, we "get" it. This is the face of addiction: Heavy duty denial, Charlie Sheen-style, if you will. I can just "will myself" to be thin (to paraphrase).

There is a tremendous disconnect with the "tried and true" methods. It's so simple really, at least on paper: Less calories in, more calories out. We need to rekindle our original passion. We know all the reasons why we're doing this, but we also know, at least intellectually, that it takes time. We need to revisit regularly what works and what doesn't. Especially at so-called "plateau" time. If the exercises are becoming boring, routine or monotonous, or the menu, routine fair, mix it up!

Lifestyle changes are fluid not static. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is written in stone. Some activities we promised to accomplish are not as agreeable as we thought they would be. So what? That's not a fail. We tried, it doesn't work for us. Try something else more enjoyable. Again, it's all about calories in, calories out. Can it be simpler?

The biggest issues in weight loss, I believe, is internal. THAT requires a lot of introspection. Once that can be addressed, understood, and conquered, the work with weight loss will get easier. I honestly believe that to be true. As one looks inwardly, one is bound to discover other elements that are also "out of sorts." It's all part of the total gestalt. It doesn't really matter which came first, and which followed, but ultimately, it all has to be addressed. Not overnight. Not in a week, but slowly, like the SP program. One innovation at a time. One day at a time. One meal at a time. One bad habit at a time.

In an extremely crowded stress-filled day, I need to find a measure of quiet time. I need to spend more time with just me. I need to reassess what my goals are, and where I want to go and how I'm going to get there. Not just about the losing of weight, but of the re-finding of me. That, too, is for the long haul.

And it starts with today.

  


What Does It Take? February 21, 2011

Monday, February 21, 2011

What does it take?

emoticon To be focused?

emoticon To be alone to do what is needed, weight-wise and work-wise, without distractions? To do something exclusively for oneself, benefiting no one but oneself?

emoticon To do this and dare to succeed?

emoticon To do this well?

emoticon To be a champion?

emoticon To actually strive to succeed?

emoticon What does it take to be a winner?

And exactly how badly do you want this?
What does it take?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PINKHOPE 2/21/2011 6:53PM

    It takes perseverance and changing habits. That's the key.

Press On!

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MICHARM 2/21/2011 4:20PM

    It takes determination and discipline!!! We can do it!

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I'm A Regular! January 9, 2011

Sunday, January 09, 2011

I learned something interesting tonight. I renewed my membership at the local "Y", and as the young woman started going through the directory looking for me, I took out my membership card to assist her with the spelling of my name. She was somewhat chastened by my gesture, more annoyed with herself than anything else, as she remarked to me, "I should know you! You're one of my regulars!" Wow! I never perceived of my membership that way, albeit I do go at the least three times a week, and when I know I'm going to be coming up a tad short for the insurance reimbursement, upwards of six or seven times a week. Recently, I started tallying manually how many hours I go to the gym (as SP unfortunately is not pulling it in 100% correctly for the strength training sessions that I design for myself) and I'm finding I've been going lately about 4-1/2 hours a week. That's a mix of cardio (treadmill and swimming) and strength training.

I'm starting to see the changes in my body for all the effort I've been making. The recent photos, as well as remarks from family and friends (even neighbors I hardly see!) reinforces what I already know: I am changing. The gym (except for when I'm sick - hey! I'm not a fanatic!) is becoming second nature to me, like brushing teeth. I know when I don't go, my body actually craves the workout.

I AM moving in the right direction. And these changes are changes I can live with.

So, re-upping my "Y" membership for the third year in a row, apparently makes me a regular. And THAT is truly a good thing.

  


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