Saturday, January 20, 2007
When my coworkers found out about my birthday, MOST of them were cool with me sticking to my guns about my diet. I was quite clear that, while I would not eat sweets, I had no problem with them being eaten around me, and they should feel free to use the occasion as an excuse to enjoy whatever treats they wanted to. I told them ahead of time, so that nobody would be put into an awkward situation.
Sure enough, one difficult coworker (who happens to directly supervise me) made a special trip to Costco, and insisted I eat an enormous, praline mega-cupcake that she'd been nice enough to buy for me. Hello, awkward moment.
I refused. Of course, everyone who happened to be in the office started chiming in, encouraging me to eat it, and in effect, "enabling" me to blow my promise. It was a very unfortunate situation, and it made me angry that she would do this to me... but historically, she has not been a friend, so I can't help but feel resentful that her motives were not quite benign.
She failed. I didn't cave.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
I have a coworker named Jane. I have several things in common with her: long hair frequently worn in a ponytail, we're both certified horticulturists, and obesity.
About a month ago, Jane took a little vacation. She came back looking tanned and much blonder. She'd gotten highlights while at the beach, and she'd enjoyed herself. Little things, but it made a big difference in her appearance.
When asked about it, she said she'd made a resolution. She just decided that she wanted to be prettier. She even had a name for her committment... she called it "The Beautification of Jane".
I was intrigued, and took a good look at Jane. She looked more toned and slimmer. I became envious. Why didn't I think of this?
Fast forward to 2007: I made a resolution to lose weight. The first 10 lbs are gone. I got all excited looking at pretty clothes online, and for the first time, I let myself fantasize about how hot I could look by this summer, if I stick with it.
And of course, I want to keep up with Jane.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
I've suspected that I might be losing weight for the past three weeks now, but I've been in denial about it. After all, there have been many false starts in my life, as far as weight loss resolutions are concerned. Who hasn't been there?
This time, I did all the math, figured out how many calories I need to eat, figured out how to burn them, and figured out how much weight I should be losing, and how fast. This time, I felt a commitment to follow through that has been lacking in my recent past.
For years, I have been so resigned to obesity, that even when confronted with the obvious signs of weight loss (adjusting the balance weights on my scale at every weigh in), I was unable to wrap my head around the notion that I could do this. I have imagined that my pants were looser before.
Now, there is no denying it. I just pulled these jeans out of the dryer (the sure test, if ever there was one): my pants are loose.
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