Monday, November 05, 2007
My brother and I at Guy Fawkes Night.
It's the second week in November and I am disappointed in myself. For the last week I was only in my calorie range twice. It's my fault. I am being careless and/or hungry, despite buying fruit and healthy stuff. The three goals I made on the first have not come to fruition. But I am not getting down on myself, I am just restarting. What's wrong with being 5 days late for November goals?
I have to be willing to admit to myself that it's not "just an excuse" to say that part of what's behind all this is that it has been a very crazy month for me. We found out my mother has breast cancer and although we know she is going to be okay, the worry and travel takes it's toll, not matter what I want to think about myself. Then I had guests in town for the last two weeks.
Aside from the fact that I loved having my brother here, I am really ready to REFOCUS on myself for a little while so I can realign my life where I want to be.
My yoga instructors believe in daily practice so I know they are upset with me, but when you're entertaining and traveling, it's hard. I'm hoping to really get down to it and show them that I am serious, even a month after starting, for no matter how long I can do it (the month after next will cost $150 and I don't have that).
I think I am finally willing to accept the coffee-thing. I have to get myself a little set-up here at work to brew decafe. Le sigh.
I am EXTREMELY frustrated by the fact that I can't seem to get the correct amount of nutrients into my diet and I don't know how I can fix it. I know a vitimin, but I want to get it from food. Why can't I?
Goodbye sweetings! Hello natural (at the start of winter, what a joke!). I'm gonna try. Why has it been so hard? Only because I am letting it be.
I have 5 more pounds, one more inch, and a whole lot of health and self-image to work on. It's been 5 months. This last step should be a piece of cake...er, fruit! (cheeseball?)