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Breaking Your Boundaries

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

“When you're trying to motivate yourself, appreciate the fact that you're even thinking about making a change. And as you move forward, allow yourself to be good enough.”
— Alice Domar

Maybe you've hit a motivational wall and need to get back on track. Or maybe it's time to head down another road entirely. But how? What you're looking for is a breakthrough to make it happen.

When Grand Plans linger in the daydream stage, there's always a risk that they'll die there.

1. Go Public

Going on the record is one way to keep them alive. "If you tell everybody you're running a marathon, you don't want to quit "When you put your goals in front of others, there's accountability, and serious motivation in not wanting to lose face or let yourself down. Whatever your goal you can draw enthusiasm and ideas from like-minded dreamers.

2. Confront the Risks

You might think that projecting certainty will get your loved ones to buy into your goal, but often it's being honest and vulnerable about the stakes that can really activate your support system.

3. When in Doubt, DIY

If help isn't forthcoming ask yourself: 'Is there another way to make this happen?'
If you have a dream, you can't let people tell you no!

4. Know Your Strengths

Sometimes Strengths—our abilities seem so obvious, and so they're easy to overlook. Play it forward.

5. Spread the Word

"Develop a supportive community

6. Cultivate Wonder

"Many of the world's inventions don't come from people simply working hard and throwing themselves at a project," says life coach Kathlyn Hendricks, PhD. "They come from wonder—from curiosity and a willingness to be delighted. That is your fuel source and your reservoir, and most people need to practice it at least ten minutes a day." The best way to shake free of your usual thinking patterns, Hendricks adds, is to make the sound hmmm aloud. "It's impossible to criticize yourself when you're making that sound," she says. "Follow it up with a question: 'Hmmm, I wonder what I'll feel like after exercising for the first time?. Hmmm, I wonder if I need a Web site of supportive weight loss. Hmmm, I wonder if I can....'" The answers will often launch you into new territory.

7. Embrace Your Critics

Naysayers come with the territory. Take all the negativity and tell them where to stuff them." Your in this for the long haul whatever it takes Commitment, consistency and control!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARNIKENNEDY 11/16/2011 7:19PM

    Love this! Thanks so much for posting!!!


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Redefining The Scale

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

No matter what our weight, we can and should be using the cues from our physical and mental selves to judge how healthy we are rather than using the numbers on the scale as the defining rod.

Health is not and should not be a numerical concept and cannot be defined using statistics. Human beings, however, tend to want to quantify well-being into easily understandable figures. We feel compelled to ascribe numbers to every aspect of wellness, from the qualities of our food to our fitness levels to the physical space we occupy. As a consequence of social pressures, we turn our attention away from health and focus instead on the most contentious of these figures—weight—checking our scales to see how we measure up to our peers and role models. Yet low and behold each of us is actually equipped to gauge our relative healthfulness without any equipment whatsoever! Trouble is we seldom use it!

What we should be doing is as with everything else in life finding a balance. This includes the use of the scale, When we have that balance and stop defining our health by numbers we instead commit to a lifestyle that honors the innate wisdom that comes from within our bodies, mind and spirit. It is logical of course to examine how we feel while considering our health—as a strong, fit, and well-nourished individual we'll seldom feel heavy, bloated, or fatigued.

If we have concerns regarding our weight, we should remind ourselves that at its proper weight, our bodies will feel buoyant and agile. Movement becomes a source of joy. Sitting, standing, walking, and bending are all easier because our joints and organs are functioning as they were meant to. When we are physically healthy, our minds will also typically occupy a place of well-being. Mental clarity and an ability to focus are two natural traits of whole-self health. Surprisingly, promoting this type of easy-to-discern wellness within ourselves takes no special effort outside of satisfying our hunger with nourishing, wholesome foods and moving our bodies.

The numbers you see on the scale, while nominally informative, can prevent us from reaching our healthful eating goals by giving us a false indicator of health. You will know when you have achieved true health because every fiber of your being will send you signals of wellness. When we actually choose to listen to these signals instead of relying on the scale, our definition of well-being will be uniquely adapted to the needs of our body and of our mind.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARNIKENNEDY 11/16/2011 7:26PM

    Beautifully said! I think the scale is highly over used. It's how we feel that has the real meaning!

emoticon emoticon

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DEE0973 11/16/2011 10:00AM

    So very true and difficult at the same time. I'm working on this aspect. Have a Blessed Day

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GONEWLIFE 11/16/2011 8:53AM

    Well said !

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Your Comfort Zone; a refuge from the stress of the day.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Creating a soft place to land; a refuge from the stress of the day.

Our day-to-day demands can quickly take their toll on our well-being if we are not vigilant about caring for ourselves as best we can. One way we can ensure that we have an opportunity to relax and recuperate at the end of our day is to create a soft place to land. This landing pad, whether it is an entire room or merely a small corner of a larger area, can provide us with a safe and comforting refuge in which we can decompress and recover from the day’s stresses. There, we are enveloped in feelings of security that transcend other issues that may be unfolding in our homes. Our landing pads also act as way stations that enable us to shift our attention away from our outer-world concerns and back to our inner-world needs.

To create a soft place to land, begin by scouting potential locations. Or perhaps your entire home is your landing pad in which case you may only need to de-clutter. Your habits can often provide you with insight into the perfect spot, as there may be an area of your home you gravitate to naturally when you are in need of comfort. Any space in which you find it easy to let go of stress and anxiety can become your landing pad. A basement or attic, spare room, or unused storage area, furnished with items that soothe you, can give you the privacy you need to unwind. If you appreciate the elements, you may find that spending time in a section of your garden or outdoor patio helps you release the day’s tensions. Preparing these spaces can be as easy as replacing clutter with a small selection of beautiful objects that put you in a relaxed frame of mind. Remember to consider noise and activity levels while choosing the site of your landing pad. If you know that ordinary human commotion will distract you from your purpose, look for a secluded spot.

The soft place to land that you create should inspire within you the mantra, “I can breath here. I can relax here. I know I am safe here.” When you return to your home after braving worldly rigors, you will feel a subtle yet tranquil shift occur inside of you as you settle in to this most personal of retreats and feel centered once again.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARNIKENNEDY 11/16/2011 1:28AM

    A great blog! Thanks so much : )

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SNOWMAIDEN 11/15/2011 2:25PM

    My home is my retreat. It needs updating, it's needs me to finish re-decorating, to pull up carpets and put down new flooring. It's needs a new kitchen and bathroom but it's my bit of the world where I can come home from work and threaten to resign and tell my boss exactly what I do think - without fear of being actually being heard and sacked and where I can be me without being judged.

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CHUBRUB3 11/15/2011 2:19PM

    Thanks Marion! It is so important for us to have a place to reconnect. I thank you for the reminder.

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Shake What Your Mamma Gave Ya!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Most of us express our individuality in many ways throughout our life times. Although, as we proudly share our offbeat traits and preferences with the world, we take great pains to downplay those eccentricities we ourselves deem odd. Instead of living lives colored by these quirky impulses, we seek out socially acceptable outlets for our peculiarities. We may not realize that we are editing ourselves in this way because our individual societal awareness is unintentionally attuned to the attitudes of the people we encounter each day. Over time, we have learned to suppress some of the most fun aspects of individuality. To rediscover and embrace these buried traits, we need only ask ourselves what we would do if we knew for certain that no one would judge our choices.

Visualizing this day without judgment can help you better understand the idiosyncrasies that are an important part of who you are but seldom manifest themselves in your existence. Perhaps you secretly dream of replacing grown-up, conservative clothing in favor of a changing array of costumes. You may envision yourself painting your car electric-green, hugging the trees in a crowded local park, singing joyous songs as you skip through your community, or taking up an exciting hobby like fire spinning. Try not to be surprised, however, if your imagination takes you in unexpectedly simple directions. In your musings, you may see yourself doing things such as breaking out in dance or dying your hair a fun color. Regardless of the nature of your suppressed peculiarities, ask yourself what is really stopping you from making them a part of your life, and then resolve to incorporate at least one into your everyday existence.

Life as we know it is so short. Making the most of years we are granted is a matter of being ourselves even though we know that we will inevitably encounter people who disapprove of our choices. When you shake your tail feathers like no one is watching, you will discover that there are many others who appreciate you because you are willing to let go of any inhibition. By doing this you help others know it is okay. No one else in the world is precisely like you and, each time you revel in this simple fact, you rededicate yourself to the celebration of individuality.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWMAIDEN 11/15/2011 2:11PM

    Oh to have the freedom to be me - when did that change I wonder? I was me when I was a child and then I was taught self-awareness - bummer!
I wonder if I'm being me on this site...hmmmm

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RAINBOWCHOC 11/15/2011 4:13AM

    a big AMEN to that! I have often been told that people love to hear what hey would want I say as to say it themselves....but my mouth does get me into trouble too!
I hope you are enjoying the new puppy, give her a tickle from us!

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\speaking From Experience

Friday, November 11, 2011

Whatever the nature of your feelings, carefully define the reaction taking place within you.

When we feel disconnected or distant from those we love. You could be trying to analyze this sense of emptiness or judging others for distancing themselves.That's what this felt like yesterday I found it to be helpful to spend some time alone just took some space, and explored these feelings. Because I felt disconnected Exploring these possibilities helped see how the universe often uses people to mirror our own fears to us so that we can resolve them.

By understanding that we usually create our own sense of separation and disconnection from others, we can learn to release our fear of being abandoned; whether by human or our best four footed friends. If we discover that we are the ones who have been pulling back emotionally or pushing our loved ones away, we can take action to resolve the situation. The more we work on resolving our fears about being left by another, the stronger our connection to others will grow. You can heal and strengthen your connections with loved ones by taking a look inside yourself and exploring your own feelings.
Our feelings can sometimes present a very challenging aspect of our lives. We experience intense emotions without understanding precisely why and consequently find it difficult to identify the solutions that will soothe our distressed minds and hearts. Yet it is only when we are capable of naming our feelings that we can tame them by finding an appropriate resolution. We retake control of our personal power by becoming courageous enough to articulate, out loud and concisely, the essence of our emotions. Our assuming ownership of the challenges before us in this way empowers us to shift from one emotional state to another—we can let go of pain and upset because we have defined it, examined the effect it had on our lives, and then exerted our authority over it by making it our own. By naming our feelings, we claim the right to divest ourselves of them at will.

And talking them through audibly also helps tremendously. As you prepare to acknowledge your feelings aloud, gently remind yourself that being specific is an important part of exercising control. Whatever the nature of your feelings, carefully define the reaction taking place within you. If you are afraid of a situation or intimidated by an individual, try not to mince words while giving voice to your anxiety. The precision with which you express yourself is indicative of your overall willingness to stare your feelings in the face without flinching. Naming and claiming cannot always work in the vacuum of the soul. There may be times in which you will find the release you desire only by admitting your feelings before others. When this is the case, your ability to outline your feelings explicitly can help you ask for the support, aid, or guidance you need without becoming mired in the feelings that led you to make such an admission in the first place.

When you have moved past the apprehension associated with expressing your distressing feelings out loud, you may be surprised to discover that you feel liberated and lightened. This is because the act of making a clear connection between your circumstances and your feelings unravels the mystery that previously kept you from being in complete control of your emotional state. To give voice to your feelings, you must necessarily let them go. In the process, you naturally relax and rediscover your emotional equilibrium.


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