Sunday, September 22, 2013
I have had a revelation. It seems so silly and simple, I'm a little embarrassed to confess this.
There are many reasons and factors contributing to my tendency to overeat. One of them is that I would eat something so it wouldn't go to waste. I grew up in a family that was far from wealthy and stretched meals and foods a long way; it was "wasteful" and wrong to throw good food away... you know: "Waste Not, Want Not."
My revelation is that -- DUH!!! If I'm eating it and don't really need it, it's not conducive to good health, isn't that kind of a waste in sort of an upside-down, reverse way? Isn't it worse than waste?? So, I'm training myself that it's okay to throw food away when the alternative is to dutifully eat it before the expiration date. It's okay. In fact, it can be liberating to throw something away that has been taunting, "you're not hungry, but you can't waste food..."
If I feel guilty throwing food away, then perhaps I will plan better so that there is less chance of anything expiring or being left over, but I will no longer feel pressured to eat just to avoid "wasting" it. Little did I know, that in itself was a worse kind of "waste."
Sunday, September 08, 2013
It's very difficult to stay focused on my mission, especially since one of my favorite things to do is eat very unhealthy foods and large, large portions. I medicate with food, I celebrate with food, I mourn with food. I have to reel myself in and remember how much MORE I want to lose weight and be healthy. People are right when they say, "your weight gain didn't happen overnight, so weight loss isn't going to happen overnight either." But if I could just see progress every day and find something else to focus on besides food, particularly at those moments when I crave pizza or ice cream or any number of other "food meds," I'd be less likely to fall into feeling defeated. I have the information. I know what made me this way and I know what it'll take to get where I need to be. I just have to keep reminding myself how much I want this.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
So here I am again, after slacking off and ignoring my responsibility for 3 years. How did I do on my own without Spark People? Not good! In fact, as you would guess, I gained about 30 pounds!
Now I've once again had enough and am giving it another shot.
I have invested in a personal trainer that I will take seriously and I have to put this first before anything else. Everyone and everything else is going to have to step aside and become a lesser priority.
One good spot of good news to report: I did quit smoking!!!! It will be 2 years being a nonsmoker on October 30th! I am SO GLAD to be a nonsmoker now!
If anyone out there is listening, I hope you'll welcome me back and let me join your community again. I don't know if I can be here every day, but Spark People is definitely part of my strategy going forward!
Friday, July 04, 2008
Feeling a little defeated.
I have this toe issue that has gotten to the point where I can't even put on my shoes to go to the gym. Having surgery to fix the problem but until then and while recovering, I'm stuck.
I will still track my nutrition. But it's hard to face every day that I'm not doing the fitness part. Yes, I know there are things I can do, but this pain is zapping my energy and deflating me. I don't want to give up. I can't give up. I can't continue looking like this; I need to win my health back, but like it or not, this issue is getting in my way.
So my mission is on hold with this temporary roadblock. I have to accept that I will not reach my goals or keep up with my fellow SparkPeople who are making progress for a little while. I hope I'm strong enough to work around this as I would likely suggest to anyone else in this situation.
But I have to also admit that I'm a little angry, disappointed, and feeling a little defeated right now.
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