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Innocence of the Young

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Good Morning everyone. I wanted to wait until I heard from my son who went through the VA meeting yesterday with all his medical records. If you have a family member who is getting out of the military due to injuries .... from the military take heed. This is what I know and you need to know. A soldier is assigned a person - ex military to guide the soldier through this process. This guy gives the soldier the impression he will be there for him. He does spend some time with the soldier - the soldier is given a phone number to call. Soldier is told to go through medical records and get familiar with all military injuries, etc. If you have questions, this guy is not there - he does not answer the phone. VA told DS that this guy is overwhelmed with the amount of soldiers that he has to handle. The process is rigged against the soldier in favor of the military. My DS was more fortunate - my DH did stuff like this when he was in the military but still had many questions but could not get answered bc person that was there to support my soldier did not answer the phone. He went into the VA meeting prepared so we thought. We told our son that the purpose of this meeting is to low ball your percentage for disability. My DS had 2 surgeries - one was botched and one was done to repair the damage- the best they could. My DS can not touch his toes or run or sit for more than a hour or two b4 his back hurts. Enough of that I will be in tears. DS was treated like he was trying to cheat the gov't when talking about all his injuries, etc. His medical records had so much stuff - the VA just disregarded. One soldier against the VA machine. He was intimated and felt dismissed. His medical records were disregarded except for his back. I could go into details but will not. His medicals records were 3" high of paper. Much of the medical records DS did not want us to read. It describes some very horrifying stuff. My son said to me that I was willing to give my life to my country and this is how I am treated. As a vet said to me recently - they chew them up and spit them out. So we will see how this process enfolds it is still on going. He was told the only thing he can appeal on is his back. My DH was amazed how a soldier is given the feeling someone is there for him but really is not. Things do not change much when he was in the 80's in the Army. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ONEKIDSMOM 6/23/2012 6:23AM

    A year ago memorial day, I ended up in a FB argument with Jessica Ziegler (wife of the most serviously wounded in the Ft. Hood shootings, short of dying, that is) over something she said about soldiers "faking" PTSD to up their percentage of disability. As ex-wife to a Vietnam vet (purple heart, no less) who *would not* go get his service related issues even looked at, and mother to a soldier who was "this close" (as in squad members wounded, including the one he gave up his seat to in the building) to the Ft. Hood shootings in 2009... this is an issue that pulls at my heart strings.

PTSD is not visible but it is real, and it is incapacitating to varying degrees. She was coming down hard on the side of "get the fakers out of the way so those who are *really* hurt can get the benefits." Sigh. I tried to says something supportive of the sufferers from PTSD and somehow this started a flame war, which was NOT my intent.

I do not envy those who must make judgments about degree of disability. My heart goes out to you and your son. Keep on fighting, that's all I have to say. If you honestly believe in your cause, persistence is the best card in your hand.

So sorry you (and he) are going through this. emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/23/2012 6:25:56 AM

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ALOHAEV1 6/20/2012 7:31AM

    Tried to think of a different word but horrific is all that keeps rolling in my brain too.

They say a squeeky wheel gets the oil. Don't back down. My heart aches he has to go through this; he has two strong parents in his corner and we are here with strong arms with hugs and prayers.

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MERRYMARY42 6/19/2012 10:42PM

    I too am horrified at this, and I know it happens has happened and will happen in the future, My brother was in Vietnam, he came home a completely different person, a pacifist, I guess you would say, his glasses were still broken the day he got back to Moms and they got broken his weekend befor leaving for Vietnam, and he was on the front line all the time, When he got back to stateside, Mom know the day he was supposed to get in the states, but he was put in a hospital in San Francisco, had lots of shrappenel and just general jungle rot all over his body, it was like 3 weeks before he was allowed to call home, and our Mother was frantic, he was sprayed with agent orange several times, got malaria and hospitilized 2 times his first year home, and is 65 years old now and unable to work, he got 25.00 dollars a month disability for a few years, but when he applied for more, they have told him there are thousands in front of him so they will see what happens. It is all a farce. I absolutely do not mean our country either. and he hs never regretted a day he spent in the marines, I love and honor our military men and women, just wish things could be a bit better and easier for them.
So that is my rant Nancy, and the best of luck to your DS, he deserves so very much.

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    I'm so sorry that you and your family have to go through this. Please let your son know that I appreciate what he does/did for my country.

10k Leader

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DR1939 6/19/2012 1:11PM


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1CRAZYDOG 6/19/2012 10:45AM

    OMG, this is horrifying. Just horrifying.

Wanted to let you know DS is going to be stationed @ Ft. Hood. Apparently they deploy 45 days later. I am really quite disappointed, but just knew this was what was coming.

My prayers for your son and you. He may be only one soldier, but what he does could impact many others. You just don't know. PRAYERS

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Happy Father's day

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Dear Dad,

This has been one hell of a year huh?
But it only gets better with a positive mentality.
We have gotten a lot closer over these past couple years, I'm very glad and grateful that we have.

You are my dad. A father and son deserve the bond that we have.
I'm grateful to be a Jones and to have you and mom guide me in life for 22 years.
Y'all are my mediators, my mentors, and my motivation.
When I grew up you guys where there to show me the world and broaden my views of the world.

You guys were there to wash my head when I hit it on a fire hydrant when I crashed my bike then brought me to the ER to hold me down to get staples.

I joined the army in 2007 to better myself but mainly to show my family that the fight is never over and that I could make something of myself.
It was rough adjusting through basic training, AIT, and the first year of active duty army lifestyle, but the rewards of knowing that my family took pride in me was more than enough to continue the trek to success.

When Y'all drove me to Killeen before I deployed that was the hardest thing I've had to do and I know it was hard for you guys to let go and let me continue the journey.

I was scared and didn't want to leave. It brought back memories of us walking and holding hands as a child. Where I couldn't go anywhere without you being right by your side.

Yalls hugs that day I will never forget because I knew the love was everlasting no matter what happened to me...

When I came home things were rough and you guys were understanding.
The love we share as father and son is never ending because we have been through so much together and shared so many memories.

You and mom are an amazing couple and raised kim and I from the ground up. Took in children who didn't look like you and you didn't know our future or what was to be.
We were raised as son and daughter better than any parent can raise their next of kin.

I need you to know that without your love and guidance I am nothing. You're on my mind and in my heart 24/7, 365 days a year, and I'm so proud to be your son.

Do you remember the first time I drank ale with u in England?
I remember eating fish and chips and we got strongbow cider.
We still have that picture it's so funny we both look goofy as hell all flushed in the face smiling. that picture is forever imprinted in my brain :) do you remember?
When I was in Chicago 8th grade year at Midwestern music fest next to the stairs and next thing I know you are there!!!
I was so astonished and surprised it was awesome that you came and it made me feel so loved that you would
Take the time to watch us play and were so supportive.
Even when Kim and I had an argument at the party at Rice and we where walking home you calmed me down and stood proud by my side til I calmed down.

You have always been there dad and we have succeeded in everything we have faced together.
I'm happy we tell each other " I love you" now and it feels great to be so open and just pure with you dad.

I love you and mom more than life itself and I'd literally do anything for y'all. Hell as y'all know I would give my life for this country just so you guys would be proud of me and know how much I appreciate what you all have done for me.

Mom and you are an amazing team and I strive to have a relationship as successful and meaningful as the one you guys possess.

I love you and know you will have a great time together in Italy this year!
Traveling the world and enjoying every second together.

I love you dad and thank you for everything you have done and the future we have as son and father.
Have a great fathers day!

Your proud son

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALOHAEV1 6/19/2012 7:13AM

    Tissue Alert! Good thing I have long arms because the keyboard would be soaked!

That is an awesome Father's Day gift and you are wonderful for sharing it with us, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(Hope things went well yesterday, geez I hope the whirlwind slows down for him)

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MERRYMARY42 6/17/2012 8:35PM

    so very very nice, I know how very proud your DH and yourself are, really wonderful letter.

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1CRAZYDOG 6/17/2012 10:32AM

    emoticon Words fail me. This is awesome.

I gotta tell you I see so much of how my son feels in what your son wrote too (and my DS did write a very emotional letter to DH which I am still processing, but basically a thank you for all the parental efforts, love and encouragement).

Doesn't it make all the effort SOOOOOOOo worthwhile. You did a good job and your DH too. And you know, I'm learning more and more as a parent that the job doesn't end! That's all right.

Hope your DH enjoys his special day.

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LAURELSPARK 6/17/2012 9:11AM


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Been working on DS medical records

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Good morning; What a surprise when one seems such a volume of medical records.
It shows how the first surgeon found nothing wrong with my son's back the first time even though he went back with concerns. After he escalated, the second surgeon noted he was missing major parts that he included in the second surgery. It also states that the second revision is usually a more risky surgery with limited success but their was a failure - where the screws were loosening because the first surgeon did not use the correct size. This was said in very medical terms. We are putting together a time line for when this injury occurred.
emoticon emoticon emoticonIt is much work and we will continue today. DS meets with VA on Monday. He is more confident so he will be prepared the best we know how to do with very little information on what the meeting will expect. I am doing good food wise and exercise. Hope all of you are doing well. DS wrote a lovely long letter to my DH for Father's Day. I read it and I had tears. Have a good weekend. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1CRAZYDOG 6/16/2012 10:37PM

    Awww, best of luck with your son's med records. You're a great Mom!

Got a letter yesterday from DS and he also wrote such nice things to DH. I was a blubbering fool too!!

Got a call too today. Seems he got his orders, but couldn't talk about it over the phone. So . . . we have to wait for the letter he said he wrote yesterday. Dang . . . sure doesn't sound like ft. hood to me. But we'll see.


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MERRYMARY42 6/16/2012 1:38PM

    I am so glad you fare there for your DS, tosay is my DH's birthday, Fathers Day tomorrow, our 51st wedding anniversary Monday, and today also is a graduation/birthday/barbeque, so it is going to be crazy for a few days, plus Tuesday both my SH and I have physicals, so we have to watch the cholesterol, all weekend. emoticon

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SONYALATRECE 6/16/2012 1:30PM

    Blessings to you & your family's health.

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Thursday, June 14, 2012

Good Morning:
My life is transformed as my mind is renewed.
My mind is a powerful tool. The thoughts I think and the memories I recall shape my life experience. When I choose life-affirming thoughts, I have life-affirming experiences. A transformation occurs. My physical appearance changes as I smile more often, walk more confidently, and let my inner light radiate outward. As I develop greater peace and awareness, my spiritual essence shines more brightly. My inner transformation positively affects my life and the lives of those around me.
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticonHave a wonderful day! I have been exercising regularly. emoticonI hope you all have a wonderful day!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MERRYMARY42 6/14/2012 5:10PM

    very nice, now if I could start living it

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1CRAZYDOG 6/14/2012 1:40PM

    Exceleent blog.

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HELP! Any one have any information about dealing with VA

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Good afternoon- just got a call from DS. He is starting the process of med boarding out of the Army. He was given all his medical records yesterday to go through. There are severe errors or lack of entry information in his medical records. VA is rushing him up to meet with them with his medical records. He has been assigned a person to help but he can not seem to contact him today. He feels that they are stream rolling over him. Rushing him. He thought he would have a week to look through his records. It is very important that this process go smooth. This is his future with benefits.
Any thoughts. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MERRYMARY42 6/13/2012 7:47PM

    I am not help at all, just lots of support in my thoughts and prayers for you and your family. Hugs

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1CRAZYDOG 6/13/2012 3:02PM

    Wish I could help you. **SIGH** Hope all goes as smoothly as can be expected when the govt. is involved.

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DIANNEMT 6/13/2012 2:56PM

    No advice but do NOT let him be rushed! Check with the VFW? Maybe someone there can guide you?

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RONNIEHUEY 6/13/2012 12:50PM

    So far I can't help.will be going through it myself soon.My daughter was injured in Afghanistan.They are discharging her due to the injuries.She wants to stay in the army but they are saying no.She was injured 3 weeks ago and she is still there.So if she was that badly injured why is she still there?I have lots of questions.Good luck! emoticon

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