NIKKIG3   22,557
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NIKKIG3's Recent Blog Entries

2015-Recommitment to Myself

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

It has been a while but now at the end of 2014 I feel READY for a new chapter. So often I get side tracked by life and before I know it I'm back to being at the bottom of my own list with all my personal goals constantly being swept aside for what I believe was more important.

Truth is what I already know that I must make me more important. And once again, (I promised not to beat myself up for being in this predicament again) I am recommitting myself to ME. So before the New Year of 2015 I decided to list my PERSONAL goals for the coming year and plan to revisit this list to keep myself on track:
1. Lose 50lbs this year (5lbs a month) totally doable.
2. Work for myself

That's it. I am not going to crowd myself with alot to do but rather commit myself to quality of the things I have to do. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRSCGE122 12/24/2014 4:57PM

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WOOFERCOALBOY 12/24/2014 2:11PM

    Taking care of yourself is much more important than we realize at the time.

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Why My Weight Loss is a Secret

Thursday, November 15, 2012

I have been on this journey for a long time. Most times I am losing the same weight over and over again. 2 years ago when I decided to lose weight I did something that I have never done before- I kept it to myself. Why you might ask when everything preaches to "get a network of support" and "do it with a friend".

I realized that "for me" with certain things I work best ALONE. In the past when I told others it then became a cruel game of "watch Nicole mess up, what is she putting in her mouth now" and I found that when I told others of what I was doing it just seemed (to me) that people around me did everything in their power to undermine my efforts. When I say that I am trying to eat better and lose weight someone always brings home donuts or cake, or cook something they know I have a weakness for and when I give in to it, then I am stared at and ridiculed. Of course this could all be in my mind but I really don't think I'm crazy.

The last time I took this approach it worked wonderfully and by the time people realized that I was slimmer and looked different, I was 30lbs lighter and well on my way.

So this time I am doing it again. I have not told anyone what I am doing and mysteriously there is no cake or lavish meals being cooked and all is well. I realized that I don't need anyone's seal of approval or brotherhood mentality to do this. I don't think anyone in my immediate circle really understands. And that's ok. I am in good company here on SP and here, since we are all going through the same thing and facing the same obstacles day to day, I realized that I have all the support I need to get through this and succeed.

I'm just really happy to be back!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOUGLYE 11/16/2012 12:29AM

  Find what works and GO FOR IT
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SUNSET09 11/15/2012 9:33PM

  Welcome back Nikki! What tends to happen is, although some may be sabotaging you out of jealousy or they realize they may need to follow suit, you are more aware of these things because it is a life style change for you and a learning experience. As you are elevated, the temptation elevates itself as well. Some do it out of love, some may think you’re losing too much and food is the answer. If it works for you to keep it to yourself, girl do YOU! I understand as I prefer my friends to notice and compliment instead of seeing a few pounds and bragging about it when no one else sees it but me. Keep on, keeping on! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KNIBARG 11/15/2012 8:41PM

    Good luck on your journey. You can do anything you put your mind to. emoticon

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Something to Say

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Today I am in a very reflective mood. After the holidays we will be in a new year. And this year so many good things have happened, along with some adversities and a whole lot of changes. But of all the things I am most proud of this year, I am proud of myself for getting back in the race towards being healthy.

Yes I have fallen off but I got back up and it feels amazing. Yes I am starting at the beginning "again" but I've started. I know that I am looking forward to the end where I can finally say "I am in maintenance mode" but just being on the journey and keeping me on my list of priorities feels so DAMN good. I consider this an early Christmas present to myself.

So today I want to congratulate all who, like myself have jumped back on the horse after falling off so many times!

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I Survived the Weekend!!

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

It has been a long time since I was able to say that the weekend came and I was able to keep myself on track with eating well, so I am very excited!!! I am also very proud of myself.

What really helped me was that I tracked everything and I knew that I had to step on the scale this morning those things kept me conscience of what I was putting in my mouth for the first time in a long time.

I am so happy now that I am back on track. This week I drank all my water, lost 5lbs and I know I lost some inches because my stomach looks and feels smaller. I am especially happy about the stomach issue because that was my biggest pet peeve since having my son.

I know that next week will be a HUGE challenge with Thanksgiving and all but I know I can stick to my guns.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 11/14/2012 6:10PM

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KJELLYBEAN15 11/13/2012 3:09PM

    You go girl! No matter how determined I am to "do it right" over the weekend, something happens. Be it just not getting enough water to under estimating my calories. I am slowly getting into my weekend accountabilities. But it looks like you have made it. Good for you. And 5 pounds? Great job!

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JOHNMARTINMILES 11/13/2012 2:58PM

    Tracking is probably the single most important factor in regular weight control.

Make Today a Great Day!

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Why I Stopped Blogging on SparkPeople...

Saturday, November 10, 2012

About two years ago I was on top of the world- with myself. I was losing weight, feeling great, and it honestly looked like I was going to finally hit my goal. Then I had a huge set back and BLAM, all my hard work and focus flew out the window. And when I finally got out of my haze I was heavier than when I originally started. Now try looking at a great new, smaller, more fashionable wardrobe with a big, frumpy body all over again! I was devastated and with that came the shame, embarrassment, hurt and anger.

Because my circumstances were so different from when I was succeeding I could not come to terms with what happened. All my blogs became depressing, angry, blameable, and shortly after, they stopped all together. Then life, then more eating then more shame and the circle continued.

SparkPeople has been here for me like no other. It has been my solace, my source of joy, my place of challenge and knowledge. So when I stopped reaching out I spiraled in. Into a bad place of regret, condescend, and misery. Until now.

So I am back. Even though I am starting at the heaviest I have ever been, one thing I've learned from SparkPeople is never give up. So I am blogging again. The good, the bad, and life.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 11/11/2012 4:13PM

    Glad ur back.

Listen to Richard Johnson M.D. give a lecture on YouTube. He wrote "The sugar Fix" I recommend reading his book.

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SKINNYSTRUMMER 11/11/2012 10:48AM

    Wow, what strength! Take it one day at a time and try to forgive!

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CELESTE_B 11/11/2012 9:43AM

    I love the blogging feature, even it it's just to post my workout notes. I put something there just about every day and I change my status.

I've found some really great motivations SP friends by blogging and I don't know what I would do without their motivation.

I know it sux to be back at square 1 (ok beyound) because I'm right here with you. And will be here for you whenever you need a friend.

Come on, emoticon and we can push each other.

Looking forward to getting to know you!

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PURPLELVR7 11/11/2012 9:25AM

    Welcome back, glad you are back

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HDHAWK 11/10/2012 9:23PM

    I am exactly where you are. I started Spark in 08, lost 33 lbs. and kept it off for over a year. I've gained it all back plus more. I keep starting over and failing, but I haven't left spark. I just keep trying. You can do this. You're not alone in losing and gaining. Don't feel bad, just learn from it and keep moving forward. emoticon

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BOBOBOBBI 11/10/2012 8:29PM

    Welcome back! SO proud of you!!! You got this!!! :) :)

Best of luck on your journey!!

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1_AMAZING_WOMAN 11/10/2012 8:02PM

    The same thing has happened to me; the negative blogging I mean. But, for me I notice that when I am spending WAY too much time on the computer I become more and more negative. After all, all that time on the computer means I am giving up a whole lot of meaningful things in my life, especially time being active. But, I am also giving up books I really want to read, getting out more socially, getting re-involved in hobbies I once loved etc.

So, for me, I am going to turn away from Sparks somewhat, and turn towards those things. And, journal privately, where I can really ferret out what I need to change in my life.

For me, I will be MORE successful at my program if I spend LESS time on Sparks.

Amber

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CROWLEY123 11/10/2012 7:55PM

    You are my hero! I aspire to be as strong as you are today.
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REFFIE1 11/10/2012 6:55PM

    This is the first step and now you are on your way to bettering your health.
Congratulations on having the courage to come back and welcome. emoticon

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KAREN608 11/10/2012 6:38PM

    Glad you came back. This online community is the best!
It was a set back but so many of us have them.
Never ever give up!

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GOPINTOS 11/10/2012 6:36PM

    I can so relate. But we are here now and we can do this thing together!! So sit down and buckle up for the ride!!!

Thanks for sharing!

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Smile and Enjoy the Rest of Your Day!
Melinda (gopintos)
Perfect Health Diet Team
Country Living Team
Dr Oz Show Fans Team
Wheat Belly Team

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PRESBESS 11/10/2012 6:30PM

    I'm sooo glad you are in to win it! You can indeed lose the weight. You have the tools, the support and the know how. Keep pushing! Go ahead, make it happen.
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CRISSA1669 11/10/2012 12:43PM

    Hi, I can honestly feel/hear your frustration with yourself and I completely understand. It has got to be very overwhelming to think of doing this all over again.......so.......don't think about it anymore. You probably devoted enough time and energy to that...so now here you are on it again only difference is you already KNOW you can do it because you've done it before. So whatever worked for you the first time around...do a replay...except for the falling away part...I bet you have learned what to do and what not to do when LIFE/STRUGGLES/STRESS etc come your way. This really is a lifestyle change so while you are implementing the changes in your life to get fit and healthy and strong for yourself and your family, the weight loss comes along with that. I have been at this for 19 months, my starting weight was 273 and now I'm down over 100 pounds...if I let myself think about it too long I'd feel stress about gaining the weight back....BUT in reality, I have made the life changes of portion control and regular exercise so I really don't concern myself with ever going back to 273. So be encouraged, put on foot in front of the other, make more good choices than bad, move your body regularly and you'll get there again!!! Lord bless your journey! :)

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CANDIK48 11/10/2012 12:04PM

    Welcome back to taking control and setting yourself to working toward your goals! I have faith you'll get where you want to be! emoticon

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