Thursday, May 10, 2012
Yesterday was that day of the week that I hate ... Wednesday !!! As it goes that day is always bad been that way for years. It was especially bad because me and my husband had a huge fight. Most know he is working out of town so a fight that spans two states is never good. I wont go into specifics about it lets just say it isnt over yet. Having trouble sleeping last night i was laying in bed thinking ok what are you going to in the morning. I am alone without the grand kids this week which is not good. As an emotional eater the first thing I taught me was to have a plan for those days. I am a high stressed depressed emotional eater. So I keep a list posted so that i will not spend my day in bed under the covers, crying eating very little or to much. So this morning i did the morning check in with the spark and a friend online and then took a hot shower ... and kicked my butt into high cleaning mode. emptying the cabinets in the kitchen and cleaning them, then i fixed breakfast. Next is to do the daily workout. The whole time my phone was chiming email messages. i just kept doing my thing in the kitchen and then when done i came to see what the heck was going on with my phone. Like i said i am alone today and that is difficult in my state of mind, everything has to be a focused effort. There are a lot conversation with the inner me that I can do this, we have goals, June is right around the corner you can make it through this morning the afternoon will be better.
Back to the chiming on my phone. the first email was that email from Xphoenix of the " done being the fat girl" team ... i know this email it is the one that tells us who is the DGOTD ( Done Girl Of the Day) email #2 said a had a new comment on my spark page ... Oh i love comments on my spark page so yea i went there to see which of my spark friends was saying good morning ... I became overwhelmed when it was Xphoenix congratulating me on be the DGOTD. I just sat there looking at it. I write blogs about my issues in life to get them out of my brain not to have people pitty me. I would never ask for anything from anyone, I truly believe that I am strong enough to handle anything by myself. So on the worst day that I have had in a while, something somewhere sent for help for me. There is no worst feeling that fighting morbid obesity alone, except maybe being depressed while you do it. And somebody somewhere somehow said I will help today. Even as I write this blog my email is still chiming that i have spark comments. You will never know how much I appreciate this today. You all are a wonderful group of ladies. I could have never prepared for this today thank you so much for the honor and the support.