Monday, August 05, 2013
So back in March right as the yearbook deadline approached (I'm the newspaper/yearbook advisor as well as librarian/computer teacher) I came down with a really bad case of bronchitis. It knocked me off my feet completely for three days, then the fourth day I was somewhat alive again and on the fifth day I managed to go back to work. Why am I talking about that episode? Well... ever since then I have never felt 100% well. There are some days I feel almost at 80% - especially if I'm really busy and active - but that's about as good as it gets. Constant fatigue, insomnia, bouts of dizziness/light headed, periodic nausea (only the feeling of it - never the completion ... though sometimes I'd prefer it to go through completion!,) muscle aches when I haven't done anything strenuous, etc., etc. I saw my doctor at the beginning of June for my thyroid checkup (I have underactive thyroid) and told her what I was experiencing. Of course, in May I had accidentally gotten a months worth of generic synthroid, so wasn't sure if that had something to do with it. She suggested that I use the brand name for a few months and see if that helped - if it didn't, to see her.
So all of June and July nothing changed (in fact the bouts of nausea became more frequent.) So I went to see her again this morning. Back in June I'd been checked for anemia and a few other things, with no results. Today she suggested that maybe the bronchitis was actually mono, and/or that I might have chronic fatigue syndrome. She tested me for the Epstein Bar Virus, as well as retesting my thyroid.
All I know is that it takes everything in me to function some days, and with it getting closer to school starting up again, I am worried. Normally I would have already spent 30+ hours working in the media center or twice that surfing the net for new ideas/websites, etc. I've barely managed maybe 10 hrs combined.
She asked me how much exercise I'm getting, and I told her -somewhere around 40 - 70 minutes at least three times a week, usually closer to five times. I was told to try to increase it to every day. Ugh. Oh yeah, on the little slip I get every time with my checkout papers it tells me - don't add salt to your food (I don't ever!) - eat more fruits (more than 5 or 6 servings??) - make half your plate veggies (okay , could do better on that ...) This little paper goes with me due to my obese range and also the last couple times I visited the doctor, my blood pressure was pretty high (although when they checked it ten minutes later it was in the normal range. Go figure.)
Yeah, so this weekend I ate a pizza. Otherwise I ate pretty healthfully. But that darn pizza made the scale go up 1 1/2 lbs at the doctor's office. I'd really hate to think about what the scale would be doing if I wasn't getting my walks in most days of the week...
Friday, July 26, 2013
Tonight I was watching the latest episode of Extreme Makeover; weight loss edition. Extreme irony is that while watching it, I was eating a pint of ice cream and drinking out of a 20 oz Cherry Pepsi bottle.... I've watched every episode of the three seasons so far, and every time I do, I feel a conviction that I need to do more and do better. Sometimes I do it, but most times it doesn't last beyond the 30 minutes or so after watching.
Last summer after my dad died I managed to lose 20lbs through healthier eating and running. I somehow managed to keep that 20lbs off through Christmas. Then ... it started coming back. I have not regained all of it yet (all but 5 or 6 lbs of it depending on the day.) All through the past year I have maintained a walking habit - at least 30 - 45 minutes three or four times a week. Just walking though doesn't help much if you are at the same time consuming gargantuan amounts of calories in the form of Little Debbie's, ice cream, soda, Hershey Nuggets, etc., etc. It barely keeps up with it.
In my fridge I have the foods that can help me eat more healthfully. It's just a matter of actually eating them. It's a matter of throwing out the junkfood I have in the house right now and pouring out the soda (which I've already done - at least two bottles. have one to go.) It's a matter of NOT buying the junkfood to bring into the house.
It's also a matter of changing habits and mindset. Like I was telling my bf recently .. on my way to go see him (a 16 hr one way drive ...) I stopped at Walmart to pick up a couple things. Without even thinking about what I was doing, I had picked up a box of Little Debbie's to take on the road. That was along with the mini-blizzard I got from my favorite ice cream joint - DQ. I was staying at a hotel that night, and felt sick after eating the blizzard. The next morning I left the box of Little Debbie's in the dresser.
That was kind of a victory, but then again while I was visiting my bf I kept buying candy bars that I hid in my purse to eat when he wasn't around ... and having so many fast food places so convenient (where I live, I'm 30+ miles from any fast food place) I went way overboard .. and hid the evidence as much as possible. One night he came back unexpectedly from work, and I was sitting on the couch after having just gotten back from a 4 mile walk in the local park and stopping at the store ... there next to me on the couch was a box of french chocolate mints. I was SO embarrassed.
I want desperately to stop doing this to myself. I'm not hurting anyone but myself when I binge on junk like this. When I do this kind of thing, I'm only defeating myself and making all the exercise I do manage to do pointless. So I see the numbers not going down, or worse going up, and I don't want to exercise.
I have someone in my life right now who loves me just as I am. He knows my flaws and my weaknesses and still thinks I'm attractive and awesome. Now I just need to get myself to believe it for myself.
Both my bf and I really want to have a child. My weight and our ages are big factors against that ever happening. If this is something I want enough, then it is time for me to get over myself and stop doing things that only defeat what I want - that only sabotage my dreams.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
This morning I completed my first Long Run with the running club. I had to miss last weeks due to another appointment. So, I did my first Long Run of 5 miles! Previously, the longest I'd
ever ran was 3.1 miles on pavement, and 3.5 miles on a treadmill.
I wasn't sure if I'd be able to do it or not, but even with some monstrous hills (well... they felt monstrous to me anyway) I managed to make it all the way. I finished in just under 1 hr 28 minutes. The weather was nearly perfect for the run this morning - a cool 75 degrees and a nice breeze. The sun didn't even really hit us till the last half mile or so.
For next week I need to be better prepared with some ice bottles for a nice cold bath when I get home. I also need to get something to stop the bathtub drain. :) Next week we do 5 miles again, and now I know that I can do it!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
I'd been thinking about joining the Dallas Running Club for awhile. I ended up not joining because I thought I might be moving to California. Well ... obviously, I am still here in Texas. :D
So today I decided that I would go ahead and join the DRC. I noticed that they have a 23 week program to train for the November half-marathon -- and that the only requirement for starting it is being able to run/walk 3 - 4 miles. Well , I can run/walk 3 miles in about 43 minutes, so I decided to sign up for the training program in the 14-16 minute pace group.
The first meeting is July 8, and the first training run is July 13. Wow! Wow! Wow!
I hope I'm not the only one in that pace group. It would be nice to get to know some other people in the area who are at a similar pace as me.
I also signed up for the 4th of July 5k run, which is free for DRC members. I had planned on waiting until the end of July to reenter 5k races, but I think I'll do okay. I've got two weeks to get ready!
I need to get new running shoes. I will get a 15% discount coupon for a local running store in the mail through the DRC - so I'm going to wait till I get that and then pick up some new shoes.
So, my running schedule will be Monday, Wednesday, Saturday, and then later on probably add in Friday or Sunday too.
I really hope 23 weeks will be enough to get me ready to go a full 13+ miles at once! Right now doing 3 miles at one time seems like a big accomplishment.
One thing I will have to do is definitely watch my eating/nutrition. Need to cut out the junk food!
Friday, June 12, 2009
Today I got an email letting me know I had been accepted to grad school, starting with the second summer session!!!! I am ecstatic! I am itching to sign up for my first class and get started!
Library, here I come!
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