Thursday, January 20, 2011
I've been on Spark People about 2 months. I got excited about finding SP because it is so wonderful. I over-reached it many ways, but I didn't realize that's what I was doing until I started to get frustrated because I couldn't meet the goals I set for myself. I chose too many teams to belong to and then felt guilty because I wasn't contributing the way I felt I should. I felt relieved when someone suggested I cut some of them out and just focus on the ones I wanted to belong to the most. It took a lot of time to fill out the SparkPoints page and I felt overwhelmed sometimes trying to get it all done (it goes a little faster now that I've had some practice). Also someone told me that I don't even have to do it if I don't want to. I didn't know that was an option, there seems to be a big emphasis on SparkPoints from what I can tell. The things I've learned on the message boards have been helpful. Then I noticed I wasn't following the 10% suggestion. The 10% suggestion says that you are more likely to stick to and be successful with small changes to about 10% of your life, or is it making 10% worth of changes (vs. the 50-90% I was shooting for). I was too eager to change too fast and got ahead of what I was really capable of accomplishing. I am nearly 50 years old. I'm not 20, 30 or 40. And I'm not sure I even know what it means to be 50, but I know that my body is wrecked from the mistreatment I've put it through in the last 10 years. Before that I took pretty good care of it, so I'm hoping that once I get going it will remember those good times. I hope that I will cooperate with it's desire to improve. I have been reading some very helpful blogs and articles that have begun to change my outlook. I've read how other Sparkers are struggling. I took a survey that told me what weight loss thought processes have weakened my resolve. The article is 'Is weight loss stressing you out?' I recommend it. So...I was thinking about giving up, withdrawing from SP totally because I wasn't doing what I said I was going to and I felt that made me a failure. Then I read blogs of other Sparkers who left SP 1,2,&3 times and came back. And I thought, why leave, just stick around, look honestly at what is going on, tell the truth and do the next right thing. Don't hide and feel ashamed. So...I'm hanging it all out there and it feels pretty good to get it off my chest. Now I can start anew and be more reasonable and more loving to myself. And isn't that the way to go. Thanks for listenin'.