Sunday, August 31, 2014
Still struggling with my grief. I think the 2nd year has been harder than the first was. Trying to move on, but not sure how. Trying to beat my depression back, get to a point where I have more good days than bad days. Money is very tight, after I pay the bills there is nothing left for entertainment.
To get me out of the house, give me activities with people that doesn't cost much to participate...... About 2 months ago, I started to volunteer with a garden group at church. Gets me out with positive people. Gives me an outside activity that enjoy. I recently joined a Bible study group that meets weekly. I also recently joined a monthly book club, I've heard that many meetings are more a gab & wine session rather than discussing the book.
About a month ago I started trying to get some exercise every day, even if it's just a walk around the neighborhood. Even if it's just walking in place while I watch a favorite TV show. If I wake up in the morning feeling sorry for myself, I exercise before allowing myself to sit on the couch and pout. I forgot to track it on SparkPeople every day, but I did ok. I feel good about how well I did.
September is about eating better, eating in a healthier way. I can't diet, I can't stick to a diet. I know I'll slip up. Ice Cream will call my name. Treats I buy for the grandkids won't be eaten and finished before they go home. Days I wake up feeling sorry for myself, I eat my way through the day.
I can however.....I can try to eat better. I can't afford to through food away, but I can not buy the unhealthy stuff when the unhealthy is gone. I don't have to grocery shop when I'm having an emotional eating day. I can purchase snacks for grandkids in single serve sizes, and keep them out of sight.
Praying that I can continue to make positive forward progress.