Staying positive (no matter what)!

Friday, November 14, 2008

I was just thinking today that even though I'm not well at the moment, I won't let that get me down. I'm going to stay positive! Health and happiness go hand in hand and I want to have them both in my life. I feel bad that I can't exercise for now but that's okay because I really want to put my health and well-being first. I don't want to push myself and get ever sicker. I'll give my body time to heal. Today I realized that I really am not fine right now. I have to stay in bed basically all the time because the second I get up and start doing something, my heart begins to beat like crazy and I get exhausted. Like today: I was washing the dishes and packing some things for a weekend away from home and after just 15 minutes I had to sit down. I was short of breath, absolutely exhausted, my heart was racing like mad. I took my pulse and it was 145. I hadn't even done anything THAT tiring. I also still have fever and I'm really dizzy. I'm really worried. What the hell is wrong with me? On Monday morning I'm going back to the doctor and she'll take my blood pressure & pulse again and hopefully she'll have some answers or ideas of what's going on.

But, no matter what, I'm staying positive. I'm sure it helps. Attitude plays such a huge role in our everyday lives and it can make a huge difference. I'll try and be one of those people who never lose hope no matter what obstacles come in their way.

  

Bad news from the doctor

Thursday, November 13, 2008

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday because I haven't been feeling well lately. I'm constantly dizzy and I've had low fever for over a month now (that's also why I haven't been able to work out properly. It's so frustrating!). She took my pulse and blood pressure and guess what? My pulse (lying down, relaxed) was over 100. And my blood pressure was way too high. She took it again just to make sure but it had only gone up a bit. She told me it would be better if I stayed home the rest of the week and this weekend. I'm going back there Monday morning. This is so frustrating! I have NEVER EVER had high blood pressure in my life! Not even when I was at my highest weight - so I'm guessing this isn't weight related. It's just so absurd that once I make an effort to lead a healthy lifestyle and manage to lose weight my blood pressure suddenly is too high. Anyway, it really scared me. I don't want to be sick. I want to be healthy and have no health problems of any kind. I'm going to use less salt and fats & oils and eat really, really healthy foods. Lots and lots of fruit and vegetables, complex carbs, fish, chicken, water. I'm not supposed to work out because of my blood pressure but I'll do some yoga (stretching might help in lowering it!). I want to take good care of myself and be healthy. I'm going to focus on that 100 % from now on. When I'm fine again, I'll start strength training and jogging.

It's for real this time. NO MORE SLACKING. It's my future we're talking about here.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KKIDSMOM08 11/13/2008 1:23PM

Take care of yourself. Don't push until you get the ok from your dr. Report Inappropriate Comment

I've been slacking

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I haven't tracked my meals or my workouts in days now. I feel horrible for slacking like this. I'm not sure if I should go back to FastBreak and start fresh. I just want to do this right this time. It's been a bit chaotic until now; I've done well and then I disappeared for a while; I was healthy and then I relapsed and started to skip meals... I don't know. Maybe I should start fresh. It would be a symbolic new beginning for me and I think it would also change my mindset and make it much easier for me to stick to this (100 % - I mean I've been too lazy to work out properly etc. I just want to be healthy and stop being so lazy!).

This site truly is amazing and it has saved me from myself. I'm now looking forward to being healthy and strong & becoming more and more aware of what really is good for me and my body instead of wanting to hurt myself by starving or overeating. I now know I'm worth so much more. I'm worth being healthy and happy. And free of all negative thoughts.

From now on, I'll focus on becoming the person I really am deep down inside. I want to take better care of myself and be more active here on SparkPeople. I owe it to myself to treat my body with the respect that it deserves.

  

No guilt

Friday, November 07, 2008

So, the day is almost over and I'm glad to tell you that it went really well. Friday is my official treat day (which basically means that I'll have a bit of chocolate in the evening while watching a movie with Tommi). However, it used to always turn into a binge which would end up ruining my evening and making me sad. This time I decided to keep it under control and enjoy my Friday night. AND I DID! I used to have popcorn and chocolate and ice cream and lots of other stuff that made me feel miserable. This time I had a bit of dark chocolate and a few glasses of Coke. I still ended up going over my calorie limit but not as badly as I used to before. I'm definitely on my way to a new kind of lifestyle! I refuse to feel guilty now. I won't ruin my lovely Friday night by feeling sorry for myself. Next week I'll make sure I won't go over 1550 calories and I'll feel even better! Live and learn, right? :)

I decided I needed to find a healthy role model. You know, someone to motivate me to get fit again. In the past, I've often admired models (like, really stick-thin ones) so I wanted to find a healthy, curvy, sexy woman to look up to. A more realistic goal, something to keep me motivated. AND I FOUND ONE. Beyoncé Knowles. I've loved her for years. She's such a beautiful, talented and sexy woman. A real motivation! No more looking up to stick-thin models. I don't even want to look like that! I want to love my curves! I think me and Beyoncé have a similar body type so that's what makes it even more motivating for me.

Ok, that's enough for today. Tomorrow is a new day! Hope you're all well!

  

I love feeling like this

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Today was another amazing, positive day. I conquered myself and hauled my butt to the school cafeteria and had lunch like I promised. No more skipping meals. I've been focusing on the portion sizes today like yesterday and I can already say it's making a huge difference! I can't wait to begin to see the results.

There's something I really have to focus on from this day forward. And that is FITNESS. I've been just plain lazy and avoiding working out for months and months and that simply will not do from now on. I've been doing cardio but strength training is what I need to focus on now. I read a few very motivating fitness articles and decided that enough is enough. Tomorrow morning I'm going to put on my workout clothes and start my day with a nice strength training session.

Now I'm going to take a shower and go to bed so I'll have energy to workout first thng in the morning and have another amazing day!

Keep on going everyone! We can do this!